S.B.
My dentist in in Dallas - but I had very similar fears to you - and also had HORRIBLE childhood experiences. I started going to Dr. Miranda (at Travis Walk Dental) about 10 years ago - and he has gotten me past all my fears. He offers nitrous oxide, and will do sedation dentistry so you don't have to hear the noises, smell the smells, etc. I can now even have dental work done without sedation - because I trust him completely and know that he won't do anything to hurt me. He even called me personally before I went in the first time to see what he could do to make me more comfortable.
www.rusmiling.com - check him out - I now live in Plano but still drive down to see him - it is worth the drive!