S.G.
First, I am so so sorry. What a difficult time. I'm sure it must be very painful to go through, but if I may give a slightly different pov? Avoid attorneys if at all possible, or look for collaborative attorneys. (This is a lawyer telling you this!)
A lawyer is looking for a fight and while they represent YOUR best interests legally, they have no consideration for your pocket book. They will fight tooth and nail to get you all the things you want, at a very high cost in their fees. You loose sight of the big picture very quickly.
It is perfectly reasonable to ask for 1/2 of EVERYTHING (401k, liquid money, investments, miles, EVERYTHING). Even though Texas has areas of "fault" which through a LONG legal battle may get you more % of the estate, I wouldn't go in gunning for more than 1/2. (keep cost/benefit in mind) Don't pay $10k in legal bills for $5k more from your ex.
Your thoughts ahead on college are a GREAT idea, thats the road you need to keep your mind on during the legal process -- what is TRUELY best for your child.
Don't drag him to court for every non-returned phone call, 5 minute late pick up, or $4 he didn't pay for 1/2 of the Children's Tylenol you had to buy. Many women do that to look more like a victim, but they just come across looking psycho.
There is standardized visitation schedules, which is really best to stick with if at all possible, because it sort of already thinks of everything for you (holidays, birthdays, your birthday, mother's day, winter break, etc.)
Try to resolve it as quickly as possible. Legal bills will run any funds you have OUT extremely quickly. Texas law already lines out standard vistitation, child support, etc. There is no reason you can't resolve it completely in an agreeable manner, and save you both thousands.
Again.... SO VERY sorry! :(