Do We Expect to Much of a So Call Organized Activity?

Hi,

I can understand your frustration. I have a 15 yr. old and a 5 year old and both do sports and my oldest has been in something or another since she was 4. She has done competitive cheer and dance for 5 years now and there is usually always an issue with something in just about every sport. I've just always tried to stay positive and as involved as I could. I would consider, if your unhappy with the dance studio she was at, that you check around and try out another one (if she loves to dance). There are usually several in each town.
As far as the AYSO. My daughter did AYSO when she about 8 for one year. I knew very little about soccer and I volunteered to be a coach and my husband asst. coach because they didn't have one for her team. We both had to go to 2 weeks of classes to get certified. (all on my time) Needless to say after all that she ended up being the one that just stood out there and never did it again after that year. So, please just keep in mind that everyone that puts that together is volunteering. I would just try and work the chain to see if anyone has something smaller that she can get. Things like that can be very frustrating, but try and hang in there.

I don't think you are expecting much at all. Asking for properly fitted uniforms is not an unreasonable request. Remember, you are paying for this activity and keeping those that run the activity employed. I would just be persistent, but polite, until they get your daughter a shirt that fits her. I've found with organized activities, there are sometimes communication issues amongst the people that run the activity which can create situations like yours.

Good Luck,

MC

Hi R.,

It was unfortunate that the registration person from the soccer league. It does show a little lack of professionalism although, as many have said, these are volunteers and maybe it would be nice to give her the benefit of doubt for the no-show.

You might be getting a too-large t-shirt because of the late registration date. They probably have to commit to orders well before the start of the season in order to have them. It's probably a guess as to what they will need as far as sizes for extras.

Do the best you can with what you've got. Get to know some of the other parents. Maybe one of their children's t-shirt is too small. Just take your cues from your daughter. If she's having fun and the fit of the shirt doesn't bother her, then be content for now.

Good luck. D.

Hello,

Regarding the terribly fitting costume for your daughter, often the costumes at dance classes are cheap and poorly made- I agree they are awful. I think by pulling your daughter out of dance you were, unfortunately, punishing no one but your daughter of a fun experience. Could there have been a better, less extreme option? I am not excusing the behavior of the owner, absolutely not. But could you have politely- but firmly- insisted on a larger size, could it have been altered in any way? (my daughters costume showed everything from the side- I did a quick stitch on both sides and it worked great) Anyway, it is in the past. Going forward, I would do just about anything to try to avoid pulling your daughter out of things. It isn't fair to your daughter.

As far as soccer is concerned, I know with our league, it is almost an entirely volunteer association. So, understand it is almost never going to be perfect- also- these people work hard, and are often overworked and underappreciated. So you may want to keep that in mind.

Have you asked for a smaller size from the head of the organization? I would start there. You don't want to pull your daughter from another activity. I would either hem the shirt, request another size for safety reasons, try to switch with a larger child, or tie it up. Since you signed up late- they may not have extras.

See if there is someone else you can meet with to complete the registration immediately. If not, try to handle "no show" woman by saying something like:" I really want to get this taken care of today, where can we meet? I am available at 6 tonight" Or, say something like this:" I am out today, if you leave the registration information on your porch I will swing by and pick it up this afternoon and get it back to you tomorrow to ensure my daughter can participate in next weeks game" I wouldn't even mention the fact that she didn't show up the other day. She knows what she did.... maybe (who knows!) she had a very valid reason. Don't alienate her right off the bat- she may be the person you have to deal with for years especially if your daughter loves soccer. I have learned to grin and bear it with difficult people, sometimes, if it is to benefit my childs experience. My friend says "Go along to get along" and that may apply in this situation. There are difficult people everywhere. How you handle it is up to you, you can't control the bad behavior of others and sometimes it is better to let it go- for your own sanity.

I think the end result should be making your child happy and allowing her to have a fun time. If that means, smiling and putting up with inconsiderate adults sometimes- so be it. It sounds like you are a strong defender of your daughter which is absolutely wonderful!

I truly wish you the best of luck and no rain this weekend!!!

Hi R.,

I find that kid's activities are usually not hassle free for the parents! It's not that you are asking too m uch, it's how you handle it that makes the difference. Keep in mind, that with many of these things you are dealing with volunteers who have families themselves, and somewhere along the line things don't get done as you would like. Explain that your daughter is going to trip on the shirt, and it is falling off of her shoulders, it is a hinderance for her to play in. If they don't have another one, ask around if other parents have an old one that doens't fit their child anymore, shrink the heck out of it, tie it up on the side in a knot, do whatever you have to do to make it work. I had the same situation with my kids, and with a little luck and creativity youwill make it be okay. Pace yourself, she's only 4!