Does This Seem a Bit Much? (3 Yo with Their Own iPod Touch)

Updated on July 21, 2011
K.U. asks from Detroit, MI
42 answers

We have a teenage girl in our neighborhood that baby sits a lot of the little ones in the neighborhood, including our 3 yo daughter. She has an iPod Touch and was letting DD play with it (neither hubby nor I have an "i" ANYTHING). The baby sitter happened to mention that one of the other little girls in the neighborhood that she's watched (also 3 yo) has her own iPod Touch! Not just she plays with her parents', she has HER OWN. My daughter is totally happy playing play-doh and crayons and blocks and magnets and Candyland. She does not play any electronic, video or computer games at all. Is it just me, or does a 3 year old with their own iPod Touch seem crazy to you? To me, this seems to fall into the category of the parents having "more money than brains" (as my dad used to say). Is this spoiling and completely unnecessary, or am I old-fashioned and behind the times?

(I'm just curious as to other moms' opinions - I'm not going to be swayed into getting my 3 year old the latest electronic gizmo meant for adults.)

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So What Happened?

Thanks for everyone's feedback so far! Of course, I can see a parent having an iTouch themselves with certain apps on it and letting a 3 year old entertain themselves if they need it (waiting at a restaurant or at the airport, for example) - it's the idea of a child that young having one of their own that struck a cord in me. I didn't really consider that maybe she got the older model when Mom and Dad upgraded but still...I don't know. I'm not a real tech-savvy person, and having the latest electronic "thing" is not a priority for us. To me it smacks of materialism and there are other gifts I would rather give my child and other experiences that I would make a priority. I don't like the idea of this stuff taking over our lives. Eventually, when she is old enough, I could see it, but not now. Like someone else said, if this is what they get at 3, what are they going to want when they are 8, or 14?

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

If an iPod Touch is only meant for adults, why are their children's educational apps on it?

I didn't learn on a computer in preschool, but my daughter does...not because she is spoiled, but because the only ones available in my day used a punch card.

Yes, get with the times.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Well, I am so out of touch with technology that I actually had to look up what an iPod touch is...so yes, I think it's a bit much to get a 3-yr-old one when I didn't even know what it was! :-) I know every family is different, but I totally agree with you. I'm trying to avoid electronics as much as possible with the kids, because I want my kids to be able to entertain themselves and use their imaginations as much as possible, and I think that the overuse of electronics isn't healthy for young children. Once in a while, yes, but it always very easily grows into too much "screen time" for the kids. My kids have a Wii, and we occasionally let them get onto the laptop or computer to play games, but they don't have any handheld devices yet (and won't for a very long time). If we are in the car for a long drive, I would rather they talk to each other or us, or read, or draw, etc. Definitely no iPod Touch or anything like that for either of my kids for a very, very long time. :-)

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Well, my 8 yo has an ipod. I don't think he could have managed it at 3, but really--who cares? If their 3 yo can use it and likes it and they didn't have to hock the family jewels to buy it....what's the big deal?

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

My 8yo son had his own ipod when he was little. It was free / a hand me down. GREAT for keeping his music separate from ours. (We have eclectic tastes; from Voigner to Marilyn Manson to Trace Adkins to Nina Simone to Greenday to Snoop to Crystal Method, etc.) He still has it 5 or 6 years later. Sturdy thing. In fact, he's listening to it right now ... bedtime music.

More on the electronics... he got his first digital camera when he was 3 or 4 ... can't remember at the moment (I think the ipod was 2ish, may have been 3). Nikon Coolpix. Same thing... for we got it on sale (xmas sale) for less than "kids" cameras, and it's a GOOD camera. 4 or 5 years later it's still going strong. And he's taken thousands of pictures with it. Several hundred that are very good.

My son takes care of his things. We taught him proper use of small electronics the same way parents teach their children not to put PB&J sammies in the VCR/DVD, or kick them, or whatever. Sure they get dropped from time to time... heck... as an adult *I* drop them from time to time. But years down the road they are still completely functional, used frequently if not daily, and in part because he got them young, he's not OBSESSED with them the way many kids/teens are when they first get their own. He looks at his friends (and friend's older siblings) all geeked out about the _________ (or the newer, shinier, whatever _____) and looks at them like they're insane. Electronics have rules, and they're tools, not some kind of holy grail or right of passage. That was a totally unintentional side effect, but I really like it.

I can see if you're not into photography or music that you wouldn't necessarily teach your children to be. But for our family music and photography and languages and books and computers and sports are a way of life. I'd much rather have kiddo shooting his own $200 camera we paid $50 for than begging to use my 2 thousand dollar camera. I'd rather he dock his ipod and listen to "approved" music than try and find his music in mine and stumble across some lyrically challenged punk rock. For the same reason, he doesn't touch his father's guitars without asking (one of the least expensive being $3k), but he can grab his own hand-me-down (aka free) strat whenever he feels like.

We're not wealthy people, but we do have expensive things that we've worked hard for and saved for and have collected over time. Allowing our son to have free/ hand-me-down/ inexpensive versions of what we, his parents, use isn't "over the top" it's normal. It's also fun. I don't have to tell him "go play, mommy's shooting"... he can choose to shoot right along with me or go play if he wants to. Just like reading. I can sit on the couch and read a book, and so can he. Kids copy their parents. They WANT to, it's wired in them.

Also, the idea that if a child is interested in "things with batteries" they won't be interested in anything else is insane. I mean... we ALL know the parents who turn on the TV and plop their kids in front of it and that's ALL the kids will do... but that's a parenting issue. You set rules & limits & kids follow them. They push boundaries (whether it's how far they ride their bike, or how loud they can turn on music), that's normal kid stuff. You just PARENT and keep your boundaries firmly in place until it's time to adjust them. My son (and many other children I know) are surrounded by electronics. They ride bikes, swim, climb trees. They're not CHAINED to their electronics. They have rich and full lives. Because they have parents who care, they aren't plugged in (or left outside) all day but are taught balance.

Just because it doesn't make sense in your own family, doesn't mean it doesn't make sense in other people's families.

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C.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Well first we live in a more tech age then when we were growing up. Second teenagers are one thing but a small getting such an expensive item.What does it teach them. Gimme Gimme Get Get Get.
My oldestchild is 11yr. Practically all of his friends have cell phones for one yr. I think it is a different situation if both parents work full time or if live in the middle of nowhere. I am trying to hold out for as long as possible before we get a cell phone for him.
I think less is more. Just because someone can afford to purchase their children lavish gifts it doesn't mean you should. I think more parents need to use the NO.

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P.W.

answers from Lexington on

Well, let me reak of materialism then.
My DS has had an iphone since he was 2. Actually, he had (and still has) 2 of them. They were disabled and he couldn't call but all the other functions worked fine. DH and I had the 1st iphones and when we got new ones we gave him both of ours. They are lifesavers on long car rides and on international travel (which we do a great deal of). We have music. movies, kids apps, etc on them. One of his favorite things to do on them is watch you tube and netflix documentaries about trains on them (all of which he can put for himself and has been able to do since he was 3). He also has his own real laptop. The fact that none of the items were new is really not important.

You are assuming that all the kid does all day is have her face in the screen. I'm sure that the kid also plays Candyland and runs around outside and plays with play-doh, and crayons and blocks and magnets.

How does any of this affect you and why do you care what other people give/don't give to their kids? You don't know the reasoning behind any of it and shouldn't assume one way or another. Maybe it's "recycling." maybe no one wants to go through the hassle of selling the items. Maybe they just wanted to give a brand new item to their kid. Why do you care?

As for behind the times, you may well be. DS has been using computers in his preschool. He knew how to use them before then.

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M.M.

answers from Lake Charles on

I will have no problem letting my daughter have an iTouch when she's three if she tells me she wants one. It depends solely on the kid, my daughter is responsible and loves music and at two knows how to work my iPhone 4 to get the iPod on it working.. To say that a parent who gives their kid such a thing has "more money than brains" is extremely judgmental. My daughter does not even know what a wii, PS3, xbox or nintendo is and will not for some time but a device that plays music, where exactly is the harm? Not to mention my daughter loves classical music. It's one thing to say it's your preference to not go this route but it's another to make a blanket statement on the issue. My daughter has a million toys that combined cost 5x a iTouch and she would rather play with my pots. And I'd be willing to say you have spent way more on toys during the lifetime of your little one, it's all relative. I just hope you'll be able to have some sort of give and take with your kid because these things are way more a part of every day life than they were even 5 years ago. And there are a lot more ways to spoil a kid than giving them an iTouch.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

I'm with you. I think it's completely ridiculous and unnecessary. I would NEVER be so daft to purchase a toddler an expensive electronic like that. Not only that, I don't find any value in it teaching a single thing.
If you're old fashioned, so am I...and I'm in my twenties.

Oh, and "educational shows" is a complete farce!! These shows teach little and act more as a distraction and babysitter. That's how I feel about parents who give their little ones ipods...that they use them to distract and occupy. I feel there are actually age appropriate to achieve this. "Getting with the times" does not mean we have to purchase these items for our children. I am very with the times and am technologically advanced. I am an adult. My child is not. He is a child. Not a pseudo child who entertains himself with adult toys. Harsh opinion, I suppose...but it's mine. I don't expect others to agree!!

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J.R.

answers from San Diego on

I personally don't think I'd ever get my child something like this, but I wouldn't be so harsh in my judgment of parents who do. If there's one thing I've learned as a parent, it's that every family is different.

And if I had to choose between having more money than brains or more brains than money, well, that would be a tough one. :) There are plenty of dumb poor people in the world, too. :)

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B.J.

answers from Kansas City on

My 3 yr old son plays with my IPod Touch probably more than I do. There are so many educational games and things that he loves to play, and I feel it's a great learning tool. Sure he plays some games that are just for fun too, but mostly it's all preschool developmental games. He traces his ABC's, does counting games, matching games, etc. He will mainly play it when we are in the car, or if I'm making dinner or something like that. If we could afford it, I would definitely get him his own.

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B.M.

answers from Dallas on

girl please, i am totally with you. sometimes i feel i'm behind the times, but for now while my son's 2 yrs old, i don't so much care if i am. my DS plays w/the same things your DD does and he even rarely watches TV. i think the longer you can keep them out of the electronic world the better. i don't see the benefit right now. he WILL learn it all later & he'll learn it really quick, i don't worry about that at all. i'm glad you posted this though b/c i feel i should be getting him leap frog (which is WAY diff than what you said, but still), but i don't even wana dive into all that right now, y'know? glad to know i'm not the only one out there. i'm 31, so i think maybe it's our generation....idk b/c my two other friends w/babies our kids age let 'em play on their i-phone. i could care less about the stupid games - he needs to have matchbox cars, colors, and books - geez! :)

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

we got a IPod touch for free thru my husbands business and my husband and I both already have IPhones so we gave it to our son (will be 3 in May). He plays music (he loves REO Speedwagon, Phil Collins and Keith Urban ha!) and educational games/apps (ABCs, reading, counting). He was hooked on it for the first few weeks then it's like every other toy. He picks it up every so often when I'm cooking dinner or busy with the baby. Had I of had to purchase it I doubt I ever would have unless he specifically asked for it repeatedly like he does for all the various choo choo trains he wants LOL! He's also really mature for his age and verbal so I trust he won't toss it in the potty!

Something to think about when not exposing kids to technology in some manner is that, at least in our school district, the kidergardners are using IPads in the classroom so it helps for them to at least be exposed/know what things are IMO.

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L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I completely agree with you; it's ridiculous. No other way to put it, frankly.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I think that it's too much for a small child. Get the kid something age-appropriate, like something from Leapfrog. My DD has a v-tech laptop that teaches her letters. She doesn't need a real laptop. I also agree that there is something valuable in allowing a child to be a CHILD. Go poke things with sticks, run around on playgrounds, play with pots and pans. Be creative. Be adventurous. Look beyond the screen inches from your face. I also personally disagree with kids having tvs in their rooms and computers with no supervision. I think a child with their OWN iTouch is different than Mom or Dad having aps on theirs for the child to use occasionally.

Additionally, if you give a little kid really pricey things, what will they want when they are older? And what will be left to look forward to? I don't think you're behind the times. If it was entirely up to me, my SD wouldn't have gotten a cell phone at 10. It was just an expensive toy to her and she didn't have any need for it.

I'm not above kids having fancy toys. I just don't think everything out there is appropriate for a small child.

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My niece got an iPod for Christmas right *before* she turned 3. My son had to wait until he turned 11 to get his. So, at first, I was shocked that my sister got it for the little one. BUT, when we go out for dinner to a restaurant, all the adults are VERY happy that child has her iPod with her, because expecting a 3yr old to sit quietly for 2hours while adults have dinner conversation is a bit unrealistic and paper and crayons only entertain for so long. My sis didn't want or need an iPod for herself, so they're calling it what it is: the 3yr old's iPod, not mommy's iPod that she can "borrow". Part of me still thinks it's CRAAAAZEEEEE, but another part of me sees the benefit of it. Plus it's easier to carry around than a pad of paper and a bunch of broken crayons that fall all over the floor...

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Uh, 3 years old??? WAY too young! I would never get my kids that when they were that little! They would have to earn it themselves- when they got older.

M

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M.P.

answers from Provo on

Ok . . .I admit my 17 month old has my OLD ipod touch. BUT he only uses it as his white noise maker at night and naps. If we were on a road trip, he could watch his shows on there, or when we are at the doctor and I'm trying to distract him while the doctor checks out whatever he needs to (he loathes the doctor). But those are the only time that my son gets to use his ipod. And the only reason why it's officially his, is because I got a new one as a "yay for me I'm almost done with school" gift.
But in any other situation I would agree that it would be to much. What use does a three year old need one for? I'm sure he/she isn't using the texting app to keep up with her friends with out raking up the bill! That kids needs to go out and play in the mud! Make a pie and force her brother to eat it, or something!!

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I wouldn't give my 9 yr old an ipod touch.
She does have her own music player but it's a sandisk player not a 300-400$ ipod. No WAY I'd even LET a 3 yr old even touch one.
you watch this is going to be the kid that asks for and gets ANYTHING.
SPOILED rotten and mommy and daddy will be wondering why she acts the way she does.

I wonder if you neighbor hood is zoned for live stock cause this is going to be the kid that asks for a pony and gets it.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

It's not something I would do.
And I hope they don't get upset if/when their toddler decides to flush it down the toilet. It happens.
My son went through a phase when he was a toddler when he loved cell phones - he'd pretend to call and talk to all sorts of things.
When we got new phones, we'd take the batteries out of the old ones and let him play with them.
As for being behind the times - more power to you!
I've worked with/on computers for 25 years as of this summer.
It's a job but the thrill is gone. I actively pursue being behind the times.
I hang out at Renaissance fairs and love every minute of it.
If my son wants a roaring case of carpel tunnel syndrome - he can go for it when he's grown up and on his own.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

no, i think that's too young for a child to have an expensive gizmo. they don't understand at that age how to take care of something that easily broken and hard to replace.
khairete
S.

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C.W.

answers from Allentown on

Dang! My 3yo does not have his own iPod touch. But I have no problem admitting that I'd consider getting him one if he were into that and we had the spare cash. I fail to see how being able to afford it impacts brain power.

My 3yo DOES play video games (the latest and greatest, to be shared as a family) and on the laptops (also to be shared as a family), and on the iPad (again, family) and with our (mine and dh's) smartphones.

I assure you that we are intelligent people. We homeschool for academic purposes. My kids run through the woods collecting frogs, make mud pies, and play sports. There's high parental supervision and interaction and plenty of siblings to necessitate strong values of sharing and empathy.
To assume that a $230 device could possibly change that is crazy.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Well, I would say don't judge, you don't know anything about how this family allows their 3 year old to use the Ipod Touch. They may well have very appropriate limits. They may also play plenty of Candyland, play-doh, building blocks, etc. Personally, I don't believe in totally banning anything electronic. Moderation and supervision are key. Making sure the kids lives are enriched with plenty of real life, non-screen, physical activity, and that they are content to entertain themselves without electronics all of the time.

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C.T.

answers from Detroit on

i would never allow my 3,4,5,6, whatever age have and I anything! and you should ask the sitter to stop allowing your daughter to play with it, because accidents do happen and if it gets broken her parents may not have enough sense to say you allowed a 3 year old to play with it, so you need to replace it. so they may want YOU to replace. toddlers( i feel) need leap frog or other durable electronics. good luck

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C.J.

answers from Lancaster on

In our house, only myself and hubby have cellphones (and inside our home, they get turned off). 13 y/o DS would like an iTouch, but he's been told he has to wait until he is 15 to have one.

Electronics are not good for anyone, let alone children. The electromagnetic field put out by all the gadgets are giving people insomnia and other, more serious, health issues.

Children in our house are not allowed on the computer before age 5, and then only with adult/older sibling supervision. They are not allowed online until age 12. Our computers are in the highest traffic area of our house so that I can keep an eye on what they're doing.

5-7 y/os are only allowed five hours of computer time a week; 8-10 six hours; 11-14 are allowed one hour a day. 15+ will be allowed two hours, when we get that far.

We don't have any video game systems in our house. We have some educational games (okay, and two Star Wars games lol) for the PC. Other than that, we're a fairly low-electronic household. I've noticed that my children are extremely creative and still know how to "play". When their friends come over, everyone wants to cook in the kitchen or play in the backyard, not on the computer. They're very big on inventing new games all the time, too.

I'd go with 'more money than brains' (my Mother says that all the time!). Not to mention not particularly healthful for the little one!

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I think it is a bit much. My daughter just got one this past Christmas and she is about to be 10.

They didn't even know what ipods were when they were 3 (she and her older brother). Of course....that was maybe before there WERE ipods, lol.

But, I still think it is a bit much. More money than brains sounds like an apt description to me. I don't think you are behind the times at all.

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M.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes and No. There are many great educational apps for the iPod Touch / iPhone and some are suited for kids with special needs. Perhaps the little girl has her own because there's a certain application on it that is helping her? Honestly, I like the iPod Touch better than a Nintendo DS for the kids. Better stuff at a lower price; BUT 3 years old is indeed a bit young.

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C.W.

answers from Bellingham on

My step daughter was given a first gen ipod touch by her mom when she was 4 years old.(her mom got a new one) She gave it a bath in the bathroom sink one afternoon. I thought it was hilarious.

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

It does seem like a bit much. My SD's little sister is 3 going on 4 and she loves playing with her mom's iTouch. So I can see a 3-year old playing with it. I guess if parents have a lot of money they can just buy their kids whatever. My SD had a Gameboy at age 5 and a laptop computer at age 9. I don't like the computer because there isn't any restrictions on it and her mom lets her just surf the internet all willy-nilly. But she's not my kid so I can't do anything when she's not here.

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L.J.

answers from Boca Raton on

I also don't own an "i" anything....I don't even use my phone to go on the internet. BUT, I understand that an itouch can be nice for a kid (even a 3 yr old) if the paretns can afford it. There are a TON of educational videos online and often I sit with my 2 and half year old daughter in my lap and we watch videos online about colors, counting etc. My daughter knows how to use an iphone because my girlfriend lets her use it when she comes over! Crazy?! SO....Although I am not buying an expensive thing like that for my kid, I understand it could have a time and place.

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

I dont really see the harm, my 2 year old has a touch screen game that is meant for 3 and up, but she got it for xmas and can play the games so.... I dont see much of a difference. Maybe this particular 3 year old likes music....a lot.

There are certainly worse toys.

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K.P.

answers from New York on

We bought an iTouch when my son was born b/c changing CD's while nursing in the middle of the night got really old, really fast! He's almost three and the majority of the items on the iTouch are his music, his t.v. shows and his movies. We purchased a screen that attaches to it b/c we travel quite a bit and we can take along his shows and music no matter "where" we are. The iTouch is docked in his room and he knows how to use it to find his music. It's the "family" iTouch, but in all reality it's mostly his and I'm glad he has it.

At his age, I had a record player and "boom box" in my room... it's no different. We don't have "i" stuff either... basic cell phones, no "tablets", no upgraded cable, no wireless in our home, no videogames, no t.v's in the bedrooms. My son is far from spoiled and I happen to have "more brains than money"- for us it made sense and was far more portable than a CD player!

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B.C.

answers from Dallas on

My 3 year old is not interested in electronics at all and I am so glad! She loves to color, play in the sand, ride her bike, play with her littlest petshop toys, and dress up! Amen! Lol.
My 10 year old has a stereo system, mp3 player, dsi, and a 32 inch lcd tv, but no phone, no ipod touch yet.
You start at 3 with an ipod, what are they going to want at 5...???

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C.H.

answers from Seattle on

I see your point as I dont believe in video games either. I think they can turn children into zombies. I, however have an Ipod touch and use it occasionally with my 3yr old to play interactive games with him matching, seek and find, and language tools. I think its a great learning tool when used for that purpose and with a parent. It should be monitored no matter how you use it. Children learn from computers in this day and age beginning in kindergarten in some places. I think if you explored what the Ipod can teach you would be amazed at the learing apps out there for preschoolers.

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

it might be too young to have their own. they can be fragile. but if that's the only thing the kid wants to do. if they aren't into the whole crafting thing, etc. it IS a very good educational tool. they have tons of preschool apps and numbers, sightwords, etc. my son has been playing with mine since he was 2. he's now 4 and he can read. i don't know if this is because i have read to him almost nightly or because of all the learning apps i've put on my ipod. i have more games for him and my daughter than i do. they also love to listen to the music and dance around. and it's great for car rides, too! but, would i get them their own at this point? no. i recently got a smartphone which is just like my ipod pretty much, and i didn't give it to my 6yo, even though i thought about it. i just thought it was kinda weird to have a 6 yo with their own ipod. but then i know a lot of those kids, too.

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A.G.

answers from Atlanta on

I think it is a little ridiculous, but to each their own. I think if your daughter is satisfied with what she has- that's all that matters. I know a ten year old that wanted one for her birthday because her friends has one. She didn't get one- here's why. She's been through two cell phones in two years because her younger brothers (2 and 4) or cousins get ahold of them and love to drop them in water, or take them apart. That's a great deal of money to throw in the toilet. I have a friend that has an Iphone and she has 3 children (6,4 and 1). She will let the older two play games or watch videos on her phone for a little bit at a time. Let your daughter grow and user her imagination as long as you can- its something a lot of kids are missing out on these days!!

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I wouldn 't buy a kid still young enough to put things in her mouth anything electronic.

M.B.

answers from Orlando on

i dont think it is..my almost 5 year old son had one younger then 3....we are getting him an ipad for his birthday coming up. i think since he doesnt have it all day and only in the car its fine.

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J.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think it is ok for kids to be introduced to new technology as early as they are ready. If your kid is happy with crayons let it be, someone's else kid may not be satisfied with it and will need something more advanced. It is not spoiling kids it is educating them. When my son is ready I will get him iPod too, now he is 2,5 years old and he is still happy with his crayons, little planes and trains....

L.G.

answers from Eugene on

Nine and ten year olds may have an iPod Touch as a gift from me. Three years of age ....too young.

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A.W.

answers from Dallas on

my daughter only 19 months and she plays on mine so i buy her one of her own coz it good for education she loves dora explore and learns so much but i give her like brakes during the day from it so she doesn't become obsessed with it so she can play at the park or with paint and do normal things kids that age should be

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D.G.

answers from Chattanooga on

Dang most anyone in my family has is a MP4 player.. i plan on getting my kids 4gig MP4 players that will only cost .. and my kids are 8,9 ,12 and 14.. but each their own

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A.H.

answers from Omaha on

My husband has an ipod, itouch and an ipad. My kids are 2 and 3 and love all three of them. In fact, they know how to maneuver all of the apps, home button and on/off switch better than I do! My husband has put a lot of stories, songs and simple games (like paint) on his ipad and itouch for them. We are thinking about getting a refurbished one for them to have. They just enjoy it so much and really learn some basic technology skills as well as classic stories and songs. It is just another form of media that is part of our lives these days. We choose to embrace it.
A.

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