Honey, you could be speaking for me- word for word- weight, height, age, weight loss, fast food ruts, the whole bit! I worked with a WONDERFUL trainer (though unfortunately she wouldn't be much help for you since your in SA & she's in Houston).
The 2 things that made the biggest difference for me were excercising more, which it sounds like you've got down already, and eating MORE. Cutting calories didn't help (unless it was empty fat & white sugar), but eating 6 small meals a day made all the difference for me. I was supposed to be hitting 1800 calories a day, so I was to try for 6- 300 calorie meals & less than 30g fat per day, so each meal was to be 6g or less of fat. I graduated down to this one, starting at 20g (surprisingly I usually hit 30 each meal!!), then 15, then 10, then 6. I never actually ate 1800 calories just b/c it seemed like so much food to me, but the inches started falling right off. I lost 14 inches off each thigh, nearly 12" off my waist, 10" off my hips (I was curvy even when I was scrawny), and about 2-3" off each arm within 6wks-2mos.
The scale didn't show any difference, but I dropped 2 sizes in less than 2 months. I remember buying a pair of pants to wear to the gym and at the time they were on clearance, so I picked up the next smallest size which was skin tight at the time (I had to try!), thinking I'd be able to wear them in a couple of months. THE NEXT WEEK I was wearing them comfortably!!!
Quick & easy recipes or crock recipes are your friend to keep you out of those little fast food lines. Taste of Home has a healthy recipes mag I subscribe to, but you can also check them out online. I also like Delish.com for new ideas. We have an almost 6yo, a 9mo, and one on the way in Dec, and we both work full time. We haven't been doing great recently, but are working hard to get back on track this week. I sit down every w/e and set up a menu for the week including the sides, etc before I go grocery shopping that way when I get home there's no question of what we've got to cook. I try to prep the next night's dinner if I am up for it so it makes it quicker too.
Little changes in the recipes you cook with make a big difference. I use natural applesauce to replace the oil & sugar in any baking (replace the oil w/applesauce & omit the sugar); low fat or fat-free mayo/miracle whip, yogurt, sour cream, cheese- my boys now prefer the 2% over regular, etc; I always cut the oil at least in 1/2 for my meat/veggie dishes.
It's not about dieting, it's a lifestyle change, and it's so much easier if your family is on board too! At first my hubby & son (3-4 at the time & following hubby's example) grumbled about it, but now they won't eat many things made the "normal way" they have to have "Mama's sweet potatoes" or whatever it may be. =o)
Baby steps make the biggest difference, and it sounds like you are well on your way. Try not to worry so much about the scale and instead focus on how you feel and how your clothes fit. I dropped 10% BMI in 2 mos, but the scale was still sitting at the same 177lbs it was before I got prego with my last son (I'd gained 50lbs with #1). I gained 30lbs w/#2 and had lost all but 10lbs in the 2 mos before we had the surprise of our life w/#3, and hadn't put on any weight at all this pregnancy until this past month when we really started eating bad.
Sorry this is so long... Like I said, your whole story is such an exact reflection of my own (except I have more kiddos), it just floored me! Feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk to or to compare notes. I can't wait to get back on my plan once this baby girl is born. Somehow 30 is coming up way too fast- only 6 wks for me, and I'm with you- it's time to do better the next 30 years (I can hear Tim McGraw singing... LOL)