Encouragement in Weight Loss, Feeling Really Down!

Updated on October 20, 2010
S.S. asks from Muldoon, TX
18 answers

Most of my life, I was a consistent weight and never had problems until college. My weight fluctuated all through, but even at the end of college, I was a comfortable size 6, healthy weight of 140 for my petite 5'4 frame. Since (about 8 years) the weight has just crept on! I lost 30lbs almost immediately after having my son in Jan. 2009, which was incredible, but was due largely to initial breastfeeding and being really sick postpartum. It has all come back and now I find myself the same weight I was when I gave birth to my son.

I joined a gym 3 months ago, been going consistently about 3 days a week. I work out at home too. I swim, I recently started running (which I cannot do, but I make myself do until it hurts, walk, then run some more), lifting weights, crunches...trying to keep it varied and consistent. We also started riding bikes 5 miles every Saturday.

I've also tried to cut the calories and stop snacking. We fall into bad fast food ruts, but i am really working hard on that too. I know how to eat healthy and I am not a dieter. I still breastfeed, so drastic fasting or cutting calories, won't work.

Long story short, I'm just bummed out, I'm working harder than I have in a long time and seeing no results. I turn 30 in about 10 weeks and I really just wanted to start the new decade and my next 30 years off feeling better. Just looking for encouragement and stories if you've had a similar struggle.

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M.T.

answers from Austin on

I wanted to respond to you bc I've been there, done that, got the tshirt. I have tried everything out there well almost. Coming out of high school and even after the college 10 lbs I was still looking pretty good and loved my body. After 2 kids and many pounds...not so much. I lose weight and put it back on. A friend of mine just started this new diet and loves it. She is going to be having a get together at her house to introduce it. I'm actually pretty excited from evrything I've heard about it. It's even endorsed by a few professional football players or something. My friend and her husband both have started using it and say it's so easy and they are already seeing results. I'm all about easy. If interested I'll find out the date and send it to you. If nothing else you come or get the info and decide it is or is not for you.

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T.M.

answers from Bakersfield on

I just recently lost about 25 lbs and the only thing I am doing different is drinking about 4 to 5 cups of hot green tea throughout the day. I put a little spoonful of honey in it for some flavor. It has totally cleansed me I think, and it has some sort of natural appetite repressant in it, I'm just not that hungry anymore. When I do get hungry I put some peanut butter on some celery and eat two or three stalks and it gives me fiber, protein and hardly any calories. Its working for me, seriously... I havent exercised a lick since my back has been out for a couple of months. Try it!
Also, remember that muscle weighs more than fat, so while you are toning up you might not notice your weight changing much.... just go by how your clothes are fitting.
Keep on keeping on! It does feel good to be able to breathe better when you get that fat off your tummy.

4 moms found this helpful
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J.W.

answers from Austin on

I feel your pain. I have three kids and gained 40-50 lbs with each of them. My youngest is now 24 months and I am skinnier than I was before I had kids. What's my secret....eat healthy and exercise. You have to make a schedule and commit to it. Crash dieting or exercising vigorously for a short term isn't realistic and it definitely is not healthy. Being at a healthy weight (which is different for everyone) is a way of life. Find out how many calories your body needs on a daily basis based on your height/weight/age/activity level (this is your Basal Metabolic Rate). You should eat no less than 1200 calories (women need at least 1200 calories to properly function) but less than your daily amount of calories. By creating a calorie deficit you will lose weight. When you exercise, you are burning calories and creating a calorie deficit. Also, exercise helps create muscle which burns calories even when you are sitting...and muscle looks/feels good.

It is not a question of diet OR exercise. You have to do both if you want to see real results. Set small, attainable short term goals. Stay committed...don't give up. Losing weight and toning your body takes time. Oh, and it is hard at first. The first month of any new exercise regime is painful. Trust me...it gets better. It takes between 8 to 12 weeks for your body to start showing the results of any exercise program. Many people lose heart before this time and give up--you are at the 3 month point...so you should start seeing a difference in your weight or how your clothes feel. If you are not, then you need to make a complete assessment of what you are eating and how effective your exercise routine is.

Honestly, I never lost weight running or swimming. What has helped me the most is interval training with weights--boot camp. The thing about doing a particular exercise over and over again (i.e. running and swimming) is that your body starts to learn the most effective way to perform the movement without exerting a lot of energy. I'll bet that it is much easier for you to run now than 2-3 months ago.

Muscle and Fat weigh the same amount. In fact, a pound of muscle and a pound of fat and a pound of feathers = 1 Pound. The difference in a pound of muscle and fat is that muscle is more dense/fibrous so you look leaner. When you work out and transform the fat into muscle, your clothes start to feel loose. My husband is a personal trainer and many of his clients have used Weight Watchers in addition to working out with him and have lost a lot of weight. I totally recommend this program.

Side notes:
A. Go to your doctor and get a full blood work up done. You want to make sure that you are all clear to start exercising. Also, have them check your thyroid and cortisol as issues in these areas can cause weight gain.

B. Drink green tea. So many benefits to list here....google it :)

C. Drink 8-10 glasses of water a day. Add lemon if water is boring to you.

D. Eat 4-5 small meals a day. Eating more frequently prevents blood sugar spikes and helps keep your metabolism rev'd.

E. Eat Breakfast! The longer you go between meals, the more your body thinks that you are starving. If it thinks it is starving, then it is going to start storing fat.

F. F is for Fiber. Increase your fiber intake slowly until you are at 28-30 grams a day. Make sure you are drinking your 8-10 glasses of water a day to ensure that the fiber is dissolving correctly or you will have gas. Fiber makes you feel full and will prevent you from overeating. Fiber one bars, greens and apples are great sources of fiber.

G. Eat Protein. Chicken, pork, fish, almonds...helps you build muscle and prevents you from overeating by making you feel full.

3 moms found this helpful
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A.L.

answers from Chicago on

My trainer has said losing weight is 95% diet and 5% excercise. It is all about the type of calories you are taking in and expending. I love the website myfitnesspal.com where you can log your food, and it tells you how many calories.

2 moms found this helpful

B.K.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi Mom
Don't be so hard on yourself.!! No matter what weight you are feeling good about yourself is the first step.
I have put on a lot of weight over the last few years but I have never been so happy. At my slimest,even though I was a complete babe!!lol I was yearning for what I have now in my life.
Try to start looking at the positives. I really believe in the holistic approach and body and mind connection.If you think slim and beautiful you will be.
Confidence in one's body is the sexiest way a woman can be.
Take care
B.

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D.M.

answers from Houston on

Honey, you could be speaking for me- word for word- weight, height, age, weight loss, fast food ruts, the whole bit! I worked with a WONDERFUL trainer (though unfortunately she wouldn't be much help for you since your in SA & she's in Houston).

The 2 things that made the biggest difference for me were excercising more, which it sounds like you've got down already, and eating MORE. Cutting calories didn't help (unless it was empty fat & white sugar), but eating 6 small meals a day made all the difference for me. I was supposed to be hitting 1800 calories a day, so I was to try for 6- 300 calorie meals & less than 30g fat per day, so each meal was to be 6g or less of fat. I graduated down to this one, starting at 20g (surprisingly I usually hit 30 each meal!!), then 15, then 10, then 6. I never actually ate 1800 calories just b/c it seemed like so much food to me, but the inches started falling right off. I lost 14 inches off each thigh, nearly 12" off my waist, 10" off my hips (I was curvy even when I was scrawny), and about 2-3" off each arm within 6wks-2mos.

The scale didn't show any difference, but I dropped 2 sizes in less than 2 months. I remember buying a pair of pants to wear to the gym and at the time they were on clearance, so I picked up the next smallest size which was skin tight at the time (I had to try!), thinking I'd be able to wear them in a couple of months. THE NEXT WEEK I was wearing them comfortably!!!

Quick & easy recipes or crock recipes are your friend to keep you out of those little fast food lines. Taste of Home has a healthy recipes mag I subscribe to, but you can also check them out online. I also like Delish.com for new ideas. We have an almost 6yo, a 9mo, and one on the way in Dec, and we both work full time. We haven't been doing great recently, but are working hard to get back on track this week. I sit down every w/e and set up a menu for the week including the sides, etc before I go grocery shopping that way when I get home there's no question of what we've got to cook. I try to prep the next night's dinner if I am up for it so it makes it quicker too.
Little changes in the recipes you cook with make a big difference. I use natural applesauce to replace the oil & sugar in any baking (replace the oil w/applesauce & omit the sugar); low fat or fat-free mayo/miracle whip, yogurt, sour cream, cheese- my boys now prefer the 2% over regular, etc; I always cut the oil at least in 1/2 for my meat/veggie dishes.
It's not about dieting, it's a lifestyle change, and it's so much easier if your family is on board too! At first my hubby & son (3-4 at the time & following hubby's example) grumbled about it, but now they won't eat many things made the "normal way" they have to have "Mama's sweet potatoes" or whatever it may be. =o)

Baby steps make the biggest difference, and it sounds like you are well on your way. Try not to worry so much about the scale and instead focus on how you feel and how your clothes fit. I dropped 10% BMI in 2 mos, but the scale was still sitting at the same 177lbs it was before I got prego with my last son (I'd gained 50lbs with #1). I gained 30lbs w/#2 and had lost all but 10lbs in the 2 mos before we had the surprise of our life w/#3, and hadn't put on any weight at all this pregnancy until this past month when we really started eating bad.

Sorry this is so long... Like I said, your whole story is such an exact reflection of my own (except I have more kiddos), it just floored me! Feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk to or to compare notes. I can't wait to get back on my plan once this baby girl is born. Somehow 30 is coming up way too fast- only 6 wks for me, and I'm with you- it's time to do better the next 30 years (I can hear Tim McGraw singing... LOL)

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

It may just take longer to see results, but think about the health results that are going on in your body by doing all that you are doing. I was a good 20-30 lbs overweight after both kids were born, and was too darn busy to get it off, even with long walks every day with both of them in the stroller. I did weight watchers and eventually took it off (about 7 months+). Still, it is a struggle. Metabolism slows down with age so even if you eat less and do the same amount of work you might still not lose. I try to think in terms of my healthy lungs and stong leg muscles while I take my walks and dammit I need a little cookie with my tea after dinner. Maybe eventually we will have time for ourselves again, friends with teens go back to the gym and evening workouts, but right now it is just too much. You are beautiful just the way you are, even if you are more a plus-sized model and not a rail. Cheers.

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

I agree that it is more of a struggle the older we get :( but just keep reminding yourself that getting older is a good thing. (It beats the alternative.) Exercising as much as you do is amazing! Way to go! Don't stop.

I just lost a bunch of weight (amazing what the thought of being the mother of the bride will do for your willpower). I have always exercised regularly, but what finally got the weight off was eating better. Not eating fast food, not only helped my weight loss, we also saved a ton of money.

I looked at why we were eating fast food. We would stop for fast food because we weren't going to get home in time for a meal or we were traveling during meal time or we didn't have anything to eat at home or I was too tired to cook, etc. Once I figured out why, I started coming up with solutions. We hardly ever eat fast food anymore. My crock pot is my new best friend.

Another downfall was the kind of snacks we ate at home. Once I started replacing chips, etc. with other more healthy snacks, I started enjoying the taste of healthy foods and stopped craving the other snacks. My new favorite snacks are blueberries or pineapple. I treat myself with those instead of several handfuls of chips. Find what is really tasty but you never bought because it seemed too expensive. It almost seems forbidden because it is pricier so I enjoy it even more.

If someone offers you dessert or your family is enjoying a nice bowl of ice cream, just take a taste of theirs. I found that all I really wanted was to taste how good it was. One bite was plenty because I could have that taste and then "show off" that I had such willpower. I always used that as an excuse, that I just don't have any willpower. Now I feel so good about myself when I can just have a bite. It feels better than eating a large piece of cake.

Eat regular helpings and don't have seconds. I used to always have seconds and sometimes even thirds just because I wanted the taste of the food. Don't stop snacking! Eat more healthy snacks throughout the day and you won't feel the need to get seconds. Also, keep water near you at all times in whatever bottle or container works for you. Sometimes I would get up and get a snack when really, all I needed was something to drink.

Good luck. 30 is awesome. (I just turned 50.)

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C.T.

answers from Denver on

Hey there girl - keep your chins up . . . with all that activity you are doing, your body is going to respond. It could be in conservation mode because you are still breastfeeding. You also could be retaining some water as a result of either food choices and/or exercise. As you exercise, it tears down some of your muscle and then your body rebuilds it stronger. That breakdown creates some inflammation and can lead to a little bit of weight gain.

A few things I would recommend is to drink lots of plain water - divide your body weight by 2 and that should be your range. 64 oz is absolute minimum. The second thing is to start a food journal and log EVERYTHING to take into your body, no matter how small. It is way too easy to sabotage a diet just a little bite at a time. The last thing is to make great food choices. Try cutting out sugar and processed foods with empty carbs. You can have a really nutritious diet with plenty of food and lose some weight just by cutting the "invisible" calories you dont realize you are eating. ie: Have a 5oz chicken breast with 8oz of salad veggies and a piece of fruit for lunch. Toss the salad with a tbsp of olive oil and lemon juice rather than dousing it with honey mustard and you'll save even more empty calories that really arent adding any nutrition. Remember you really only need to increase your intake by 500 cals over maintenance needs to cover breastfeeding.

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

Im right there with ya, i think when we decide to quit breastfeeding itll come off easier, since we are able to restrict calories and ou=r bodies dont want to store our fat.

1 mom found this helpful

S.W.

answers from Houston on

Keeping track of everything you eat is so very important. Having a place to do this is really great too! There is a place online where you can do this: it's called SparkPeople (sparkpeople.com) and it's absolutely free! It's all in one central location - nutrition (keeping track of what you eat), exercise (keeping track of how you work out) and weigh-ins (keeping track of your progress). In addition there are recipes from other members, groups to join that have common goals and interests, and a whole community of people out there that want to cheer you on as you make your goal! If you do join, look me up at lyricangel!

One tip I have is that if you do use sparkpeople, change the nutrition from their menu to entering what you want to eat. It makes a big difference. I've been back on sparkpeople now for three months (I started it two years ago but forgot about it) and I've lost 25 pounds already. (Of course, I probably have a LOT more to lose than you do! :) ) Also, when you're searching for something you eat, make sure to click the radio button marked 'Search All Words'. It makes it easier to find exactly what you're looking for. Good luck, hope to see you there!

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M.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Weight loss is much more connected to diet than exercise. "Trying" to cut calories and not snacking might not be enough. And sometimes when you don't snack you eat more at your meal. I would say keep doing what you are doing-the exercise is an awesome thing! You are so young and this is a habit that will be nothing but beneficial in the upcoming decades. Once you stop breastfeeding you should really try to get on a more restricted calorie diet if you really want the weight to come off. Try weightwatchers maybe. They probably have an adjustment for BF so you may want to look at it now.

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B.K.

answers from New York on

I'm in the same boat as you! Every day is a new day. I was very active before my son (4yrs). I worked out 6-7 days a week, 2 hours a day...very easy when you don't have kids. I gained 70 lbs with my son. That's alot, especially when you're only 5'1"!!! Well I think I lost 5 lbs after he was born and then I never got back to the gym. Now, I just had my daughter 4 months ago and I had gained 30 lbs with her. Luckily I lost 20 lbs after she was born, then it started creeping up on me again.
I recently started weight watchers online. I know that I'm obviously eating too much and not working out enough probably because I'm exhausted from running around chasing two kids8-)
But I actually liek the program and I think it was the jump start I needed to get me back in the groove.
I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one! Keep up the good work. It's not easy! Wishing you lots of luck. It'll take time, but you're not alone!

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M.M.

answers from Houston on

Go to your doctor and ask for a blood test. It might be your thyroid.

Research Hyperthyroid and Hypothyroid.

Since running hurts don't do it. You could cause more harm than good to your body. Instead walk briskly for 3 minutes, slower for 3, then repeat. Pump your arms so that they come up above your chest. This will increase your heart beat.

Make sure breakfast is one of your main meals (or at least eat breakfast). You need to get your metabolism kick started in the morning. If you are starving yourself for breakfast, it's not going to help. Good Luck!

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

three days a week is to main tain your weight not loose. you should work out 5-6 days to loose. even fast foods have healthy choices...even if your eating salad all the time its better than fried grease. your body will thank you. i lost about eighty lbs before i was pregnant. i gained all the weight back after both kids and am now sitting with a broken leg! my major hang up is i have a slightly low thyrioid and i am insulin resistant. but i am able to loose a little weight while not on those medications. you can do this. treat every day as if your going to better yourself for tomorrow. what really helped me when i wanted the sweets was to just pretend for a second that i had ate the cookie then how would i feel after i ate it. i usually always passed it up. i would also think about having to walk around the block before i ate something extra that my body truly did not need. i felt sooo good. i miss being healthy. i hope you can get in gear so it encouages us that are trying to encougage you. good luck.

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M.T.

answers from San Antonio on

Write everything you eat! It's amazing what you learn about yourself when you write your meals including snacks. What has worked for me is counting calories and do cardio workouts. Drink a lot of water, especially before each meal. If you have a sweet tooth have flavored green tea especially at night time. It's hard work but you are still young and I congratulate you for wanting to do something for self. :0)

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F.W.

answers from Flagstaff on

I didn't have a weight problem until I had to take essential medications for my well being. I went from 130 to 230. I have fought weight ever since. During pregnancy I only gained 25 pounds then lost that. I had to make a life change. I am now down to 188 and did it with Slim Fast always knowing that I'll have to buy those premade cans for work for possibly the rest of my life. I have intestinal problems so I have not worked out in a while but once that is cleared up, I will. Each person is different. I found it is all portion control. Remember restaurant portions? Cut it in half. It's hard at first because you will be shrinking your stomach. It took me about 2-3 weeks but was worth it. If I go to McD's I buy the dollar menu, double cheese burger and small fries - NO soda. You will get there just have patience.

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R.L.

answers from Houston on

I know you've received a lot of great advice, but her is my 2 cents. I had issues losing weight for years. I tried exercise, diets etc. The only thing that ended up working for me was Weight Watchers, and I did it all online. It was great because I didn't have to go to any meetings or buy any special foods or supplements. I could still go out to eat and buy whatever at the grocery store. What the program does is help you make good food choices by staying within the program. The online tools help you keep track of what you eat. What I found out was that I wasn't eating enough, so my body was holding on to the fat. I lost 37 lbs and kept most of it off for about 3 years.

I'm pregnant now so I'm not stressing about food, but afterwards I will probably need to do WW again! lol
Hang in there, remember it's a marathon not a sprint and you need to lose weight in a health way. No more than 3-5 lbs a week or else it will just bounce back. Whatever you decide to do I'm sure you will get there just keep going!

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