hi cassandra,
I also have a 4 year old. I'm not sure what your faith is, or if you're a christian, but our little munchkin understands about heaven and about the Lord. and that when someone passes away it is because that was the time that God was ready for them to be in heaven with him. Heaven is a wonderful, real place. and when kids understand that, they are very eager to go be with Jesus (at least mine is!) =) and happy for the one that was able to go be with the Lord. I'd just keep it in the positive, if possible. =) there is definate saddness for the loss, but it can be a saddness with joy.
I'm am very sorry for your loss and for the family. Hope this helps.
oh, and about the shots, whenever i am able, i just like to prompt other mommies to do more research on the subject. It was another mom who challenged me on whether or not to vaccinate and at first, i didn't understand and thought she was crazy for even considering not vaccinating. well, i did research to try to prove her wrong and "help" her kids by finding research to cause her to vaccinate once again. well, everything i learned caused us to chose not to vaccinate.
They are truely the biggest health or safety mistake I’ve ever made when it comes to my children and something I’ll never do again. Most parents (like myself before)are led to believe there is no question about the safety of vaccines. Also, most parents are led to believe that vaccinating is the only way and to choose differently is being irresponsible. ( that's what my doctor told me) The truth, however, is that there is a much healthier choice.
Vaccines have very dangerous ingredients in them. such as- antibody boosters, stabilizers, drugs, antibiotics and toxic disinfectants such as neomycin, streptomycin, sodium, chloride, sodium hydroxide, aluminum hydroxide, sorbitol, hydrolyzed gelatin, formaldehyde and a mercury derivative known as thimerosal and are made with and in horse veins, aborted baby organs and money kidneys.
And whenever this topic gets brought up, there are always a few moms that get angry because it can be a sensitive subject. But, it's our children. our precious children...i think we, as parents, should have the ultimate responsiblity for them and not just rely on what a doctor says and do research for ourselves and for our kid's health and lives. =)
also, did you know that 1 in every 150 kids are becoming autistic now? It is actually an epidemic now in the US. and very much so related to vaccines ( in particular- their 18 month "well" visit shots). (that's why all cases are found out after the year and a 1/2 mark!)
well, if u have any questions....i'm here.
M.