Family Home

Updated on April 11, 2013
R.H. asks from Fayetteville, AR
19 answers

I came on this site in December or so 2011 when my dad was terminally ill. It is now over a year that he has been gone. He did not have a will (as it was not notarized, so none...). The family home is left to my two sisters and me. The oldest lives there rent free as it is paid off (57 year old home). She also has put about $10,000 in repairs in it--some repairs were merely aesthetic. Now, she says that she wants to put the home in her name. Advice?

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Really? Can no one trust their sister?

For me, it would depend on how close you are and whether or not you trust her, and if it actually makes sense, tax-wise. I don't have a sister, but I know some sisters who could completely trust each other in a situation like this.

However, it sounds like you don't have one of those sisters. You say hell no, so I guess it's hell no.

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B.Z.

answers from Minneapolis on

It seems fairly simply, she has to buy you guys out. Several of my friends have had this same issue lately and they just got a couple of valuations and go middle of the road and split it three ways. She owes each of you one third. As to the money she spent, if it was needed in order to sell it you could reduce the house by that amount. I do know that you should not get into big fights with family members over things like this. It is just money and family is more important.

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K.P.

answers from Miami on

I would like to think that your sister is coming from a good place, so speak with an attorney about your options and long-term impact.

I know that when my grandparents died, their home was left to my mother and aunt jointly. They shared ALL costs associated with renovating the house to be sold. When the house sold, they shared to profit from the home.

In theory, she either needs to "buy out" the other siblings for fair market value. Hypothetically, if the house is worth $120,000 you are each entitled to $40,000 "worth" of the house, so to have the house to "herself", she would need to give each of you $40,000. That's really the only fair way to do this.

She should not be able to live in "your house" rent-free, especially if you or your other sister is still carrying a mortgage on your own home! She can either buy it for herself (which would make sense if she's got her own money in it already) or you can sell it and divide the profits.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

When my grandpa died my uncle wanted to continue living there, same deal really paid off home all that. They put the home in a trust so that each retained their ownership rights my uncle paid all taxes because he was the only one living there.

If she wants it in her name only she needs to secure a mortgage and buy out your ownership rights.

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M.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Heck to the NO!!

Have her buy out your portion of the home.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I think your best bet would be one of two options...

#1...Get a market appraisal for the home and let her buy you and your sister out. For example, if the home appraises for $150k, she needs to take a loan out to pay you and your sister $50k each.

#2...Sell the house and divide by 3.

If neither of those options work, I think she should pay the taxes 100% in lieu of rent! You and your other sister are not benefiting from this free house--only the sis living there.

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O.O.

answers from Kansas City on

Get an appraisal, agree on a "good" price & have her buy you & your sis out.
That said, since she is living there rent free, wouldn't it make sense for her to be (at least) solely paying property/school taxes herself?

I assume you want to keep your names on it, so it is still (legally) yours and an asset? If so, them I think the two of you should pay taxes AND reimburse her for the improvements she's made.

ETA: Rhonda, you need to explain the tax situation in TX. In PA, people over 65 aren't "exempt" from paying property/school taxes. Looks like they're not exempt in TX, but may qualify for a reduction/ exemption amount:
http://www.window.state.tx.us/taxinfo/proptax/exmptns.html

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S.E.

answers from Wichita Falls on

If she wants to buy out the remaining interest in the house from you and the other sister, then yes she should have it in her name. Otherwise I would suggest that she consider the taxes, insurance, and repairs on the home as 'rent' and that the house be put in all three of your names.

If she has a problem with that, then you should consider selling the house outright and splitting the proceeds. (aka Solomon and the baby style).

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Wills in PA don't have to be notorized and I just googled TX law and it states that there is no requirement in TX for a will to be notorized. So if your dad had a will it is probably valid.
If the house was left to all three of you, your sister who lives in the house should buy you and your other sister out. Is it possible though that your dad left the house to just your sister who lived in the house? As a parent, I sure would not want my child to have to move because of my death. On the other hand, if she can't afford to buy you out then she should pay you guys rent and when the house is sold all three of you should split the proceeds. That is assuming you and your other sister aren't in dire need of the money.
I hope all who read this know the importance of having a valid will.

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B.W.

answers from Washington DC on

While I don't know your family, seems her motivation is not simply to help you all out by not having to pay taxes but her reaping the benefit solely of the sale of the property. Since the property is paid off, she will be sole beneficiary of the profit of the home. Pretty sweet deal for her only. Why do you say "Hell No" though? Is it because of the money she will be making. Do you need the money or is this simply, 'Not fair'? I would hate to see money ruin a relationship as it often does when a parent passes and there is little or no guidance on the finances.
My suggestion, if the money means that much: put he house up for sale, split the money 3-ways but she shuold be entitled to the $10K she has invested in the property (aesthetic or not).

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

If she wants it in her name only I think she should buy the two of you out.
If she wants to continue living there rent free while it's in all three names? Well I don't know what your relationship is like. If it was MY sister I absolutely wouldn't ask her to pay rent, especially if she is investing in maintaining the home (aesthetic upgrades add to a home's value too after all, so it benefits you all as owners.) But my sister has never been married, has no kids and will have a very modest retirement. I have a beautiful home and family, and my husband has worked hard to make sure our retirement is secure. Therefore I would like to think that I would be generous with her, and not just worry about getting what's "owed" to me.
Be careful here, splitting up money and property after the death of a parent drives families apart, my husband sees it ALL the time in his business. Be happy and grateful for what you have and only take what you truly need and/or really, really want. Playing tit for tat is not worth losing your relationship with your sister (and she's 65!)

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M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

Keep the home in all three of your names, or better yet, have her buy you out if she wants to own it. If she wants to reimburse you for taxes she can do that without taking your name off. Sounds a little fishy to me.

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M.K.

answers from Columbus on

First of all, is the house in all three names right now? If there was no Will, was there a TOD?

I am in almost the exact same situation right now!! After my Mom passed, my Daddy put the house into a "Transfer on Death" deed so my two sisters and I could own it without having to pay taxes - that is until/if we sell it. I didn't see any problem with this. He then left us enough money to pay taxes, etc., and to do any repairs so we could sell it; he didn't really want us to rent it out (not sure why). But then after my Daddy passed, one of my sisters turned into a Witch with a capital B!!! She has fought me and my other sister on everything and refuses to help with anything! It's been a nightmare - especially since I'm two hours away and trying to deal with all this!

I am at the point now where I don't care any more and just want to unload the hassle and headaches of dealing with her - I would be willing to put the house in just her name and then she can do whatever she wants BUT I would have a lawyer draw up some type of contract so that when the house is sold, I would be given my fair share, minus any of her own money she would put into it.

If you still want to have your say as to what happens with the house, I would NEVER let her put the house in just her name. I'm not sure this can even be done WITHOUT a lawyer so no need to worry about her doing anything like that behind your back. As for taxes, either split them three ways, or if she's living there full time, let her pay a bigger portion. I hope she's paying the utilities while living there and doesn't expect you all to chip in - that wouldn't be fair?

Whatever you decide, I would at least consult with a lawyer that is proficient in dealing with this type of stuff and get your questions answered before you do anything.

Good luck!!!

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

That she thinks she can live rent-free in the home is ridiculous. If she wants to live there and manage the home, she has to buy out you and your sister. If she can't do that, then she should be paying rent.

The rental income could be held in an account that takes care of repairs, etc. and the rent amount should account for things that she does to maintain the home - so if fair market value for rent is $900 a month but she mows the lawn and does other things that a landlord would normally have to do or pay someone else to do, the worth of those services (say, $100) should be credited such that she actually pays $800 a month. Plus as a 1/3 owner, one-third of the money would go back to her anyway so her rent would really be $536 a month. However if you want to use the rent to build up a repair fund, she should pay the full amount ($800) into the fund each month so that her 1/3 of the repair fund is actually there. Any repairs would have to be agreed upon by the 3 of you to come out of that account. Cosmetic changes that she wants to do herself should be at her own expense.

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L.P.

answers from Boca Raton on

split the 10k she spent 3 ways (you each are responsible for that), then sit down and offer her to buy you out. if she refuses then agree on a rent, remember the rent will be very little because it will be split 3 ways (one of which is hers). i say sell the home.

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

I would say sure- as long as she buys you and your other sister out of your portions of the estate, basically 2/3s of the value of the home. That's exactly what a judge would say, also, if this went to court.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Mama duck is right. That is the only thing I would agree to. (Having her buy you out).

J.C.

answers from Columbus on

You say "hell no".

I say walk a bit more carefully. Death in the family tends to bring out the worst in some people. She may be looking at it that she's helping you with the taxes. I get the feeling you're seeing a money grab. Whether it has been cosmetic or not, $10,000 is $10,000. That's a lot of money in my book.

Do what you can to come to an agreement without sore feelings. If it means call an attorney for advice (for all of you, not just for you) than so be it.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think she feels like she's the only one that cares about the home, maybe because she's there every day and putting her own money into the repairs when it should be each one's job to send money each month for the upkeep. She's the one living there and can see what needs to be done.

If she's spending her own money to do the repairs then she is in fact paying you guys something each time she makes a repair. It is improving the value of the home instead of letting it get run down.

So I suggest that you all sit down and discuss an expense amount you are each comfortable with for repairs, insurance, and general expenses. If you want to let her continue living there and her oversee the home then she could do that in lieu of paying a portion of repairs. An executor of an estate gets a percentage each year for their work, why not waive her portion of any costs for her taking care of the property?

She's paid each of you $3000 in upkeep on your property...that's what I'm seeing that you said. She paid $10,000 in repairs on her own without sending you a bill for your portion.

She is willing to pay all the taxes instead of sending you a bill for your owed portion. She's not living there for free, she's keeping you from having to pay repairs and taxes by doing it herself.

If you want to keep the home ownership you all must sit down and decide how much money each year you are willing to send to her for stuff.

If it were me I'd keep the home ownership but give her some sort of status for her time and effort in keeping the home up and taking care of it.

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