Family Size

I have four of my own and am now raising my husbands two little boys as well. I say go for it! The love you receive will out weigh anything else! You have plenty of love to go around. My #3 has kept me laughing for the last 16 years!

As soon as you have this child, you will love this child just as you do your others. I have three and would not change a thing. Yes, I am busy but a loving busy. I say go for it! Children can be one of our greatest gifts from God! I know mine are!! Have faith. God bless!

I am not saying that I regret having my 3rd (mine are almost 4, 2 and 3 months-all boys) but we are deep in the trenches and it is so hard (this 3rd one has really been a doozy) right now that I'm not sure what I was thinking having another baby. :) I think it depends on your older 2 how hard it will be and the ages.

I know I would have always felt that my family wasn't complete if we hadn't had him but man 3 is VERY different than 2. I look forward to when things get a little easier.

My husband and I are in the same boat here. We're trying to decide about a third child. I'd like to have another one, especially sooner than later so he/she won't be so far behind in age from our first two kids who are 3 and almost 2. But I don't see us financially able to do it for at least another year. If it's later than a year or two we probably won't because I don't want one so far behind my current two. And I'm almost definitely sure I don't want more than 3 kids either.

If we only have our two I would still be happy. There are a lot of benefits to our family of four. Practical ones like we can all fit comfortably in one car. And financial ones like cheaper vacations and less college savings accounts. But when you look at those things compared to the benefits of another child and the happiness they will bring your life there's really no comparison if you're looking at the love aspect.

You have to make the decision that is right in your heart and make sure your husband feels the same way too. It sounds to me like you're ready if you want to do it, good luck with whatever you decide :)

My thrid child was my only "planned" baby! As long as you can have financial respondsablity I say go for it! It is a HUGE change from 2 to 3 so just be ready! Pros and cons are to hard cause how can you put a con on anyone of your kids?!Good Luck you know what's right for your family!

Hi ladies I agree with all of you no matter how many children you choose or decide to have they are all blessings from above mine are 11 girl ,9 boy , and 2 boy and I would not trade them for anything . We talked to the oldest kids and we made it a family decision to bring another baby into our family and now that he has come and is 2 they want more siblings lol . I am 34 and done but I still have my days and times I think why didnt we have more but I know our limits and want to be able to provide for all them in an equal way and having more would have not allowed that . That is why I chose to stay at home and provide care for other peoples children is so my kids will be around others and they can feel like part of our family and still go home at the end of the day lol. This is a something that you and your husband need to figure out together . To me the pros were knowing that we created something together and can raise into something amazing in our eyes . The cons for me was what if I never had the chance to do it again ,Ihad a tubal in between the boys it was horrifying and the Dr. told me that there would be a 90% chance of having another one but I made up my mind that is not going to happen and had to try again {Just one more time I said to myself and husband }and I am so glad I did because my 2 year old is amazing and has learned very quickly being around older siblings but dont get me wrong he is very independet . So any way I wish you both the best of luck on what ever decision you make . Wheather you have 1,3,5or 10 you will always be family .

Hi A.,
As long as both you and hubby agree on the 3rd, are financially able to support an addition to your household, and are able to devote the time and attention to another baby, why not? I grew up in a household of ten kids, and we have a blast! I love a big family although I have only one due to a medical condition. Another factor to consider is the current age of your kids. What are some reasons why you may be hesitant to add a 3rd? Sounds like you have the monetary resources, time, and attention to devote to another child, but you hadn't mentioned why you don't want a 3rd. Is it due to your hubby's hesitation? If so, it may be best for BOTH of you to agree on a 3rd before jumping into anything.

A.-
I just had my third child 7 months ago and absolutely would do it again. I don't know if it's because she's the only girl but I can't imagine life without her. I am also the youngest of three. Three is good! But you and your husband have to make that decision. Also, talk to your kids about it and see what they think. I'm actually thinking of having one more! Yikes!

When I was pregnant after my 2nd child was born a lot of people told me only two was better. Because of the 12 year gap between 1 and 2 having a third was just like having only 2 at home. So I'm not a qualified.

I would consider your age and health as well your husband's age in this. For me, Tiger was my 10th pregnancy and I was 36. The older you are the higher some risks are; complicate that with many more miscarriages than live births and my doctor had she been involved in pre conception would not have let me rebound from a heartbreaking ectopic after a 6th miscarriage. She would have stopped me dead in my tracks and Tiger would not have been born.

Consider the full cost of a child including an education first. Your own finances could change overnight.

Now my husband has 3 younger brothers and a younger sister. My mil says the only trouble she had with the youngest three being about a year apart each was that they went through those bad phases together and lingered there. She also had the need to put all three in rehab at the same time, all out of pocket. But the majority of their problem is they grew up without a lot of parental supervision, MIL was too busy running the family business, working a 2nd job, caring for her aging MIL and ill husband (he's 20 years older than her).

The other brother who escaped the perils of youth at their house, married very young and lived at home with his wife and child for a long time. He now has 3 children and a home of his own. He says the trouble is planning for the kids futures. Financial things are in place but in the event of their demise, well not many people would take on 3 kids together he's thankful that we can be counted on if his sil or bil can't.

Hi A.,

Well I have 4 total. And I can tell you I couldn't live with out my 15 yr old even though some days he makes me really mad. When he was a baby I called him my little froggy man because thats how he laid all the time. He had long curly hair for a boy but when he turned 3 we cut it. Now brown hair, brown eyes and about 5' 2", he's taller than me

My 2nd I gave him the nickname of chewylicous when he was born. His hair was the color of corn silk, still is. He is so honest in what he tells you and doesn't lie. He is just awesome. Blonde hair, blue eyes his hair is straight as can be.

My 3rd, why did we have her ? I believed 3rd time would be a charm for us to have a girl and I was right. She is my jilliebean blonde hair and very curley like a rats nest, blue eyes (they more look purple) her eyes are so awesome, I love them. She will be my famous painter and dance on broadway one day or be a ballerina because she can already walk on the tip of her toes. She is a graffit artist she penciled the inside of are toilet bowl, coloered are cabinets with permanent marker, sprayed oxi clean on our big T.V. and ate the finish off our stand, oh and just last week she and a little girl poured 2 bottles of shampoo all over the bathroom floor, they were finger painting !!! Do you know how many suds come from 2 bottles of shampoo, alot. But I love her and can't imagine life without her.

And my 4th she will be 7 months old on the 14th of June. What will she be, I wonder. At this point she is so happy all the time she has started just sitting in her walker swaying back and forth, I have no idea how this started. She squeals like a little pig when she is happy. I can't wait and I can to see what her personality will be.

So A. what should you do ?? Well I would say go for it, life is way to short. You're not getting any younger and the kids are getting older. Times a wastin' And as always follow your heart, live with no regrets. And yes you will have more expenses and all of these things but if you don't it may be the one that got away, lol. Go for it and have fun makin' it.

I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I didn't have my 4 kids in my house. I have Christopher(15 yrs old), Matthew (6 yrs old), Jilliean (3 yrs old) and the final 4 is Rhiannon (7 months, soon enough) W.

I wouldn't be concerned about the middle child syndrome, I love my children equally and show them all the same amount of attention, and I'm sure you will do the same. Goodluck, W.

A.,

Follow your heart. I have three girls and wouldn't change a thing!!! Even though my 3rd wasn't planned, she has added so many blessings to our family. We were perfectly happy with two and really hadn't even talked about adding another, and when I found out I was pregnant it was a little scary I admit, but, it has all turned out great. Children are gifts from God so if He chooses to bless you with another, what can be bad about that???

Good Luck,
B.

I am a mother of 3 ages (7, 5 & 4). They came back to back. After I finished nursing one I was pregnant with the next. It is good that you are planning. My third child caught me off guard. I already had a toddler and an infant then found out I was pregnant again. Initially, I was in shock, denial, afraid. Went through all those emotions then finally with a lot of prayer, acceptance. My third child was born and I gave him everything I did the first 2. Even nursed him for 13 months. Going from 2 to 3 is hard. You really notice those extra duties. You take away from the 2 you currently have because now you have to do for three. I have to buy 3 of everything which can be costly. I have tuition for three. You now have to fit 3 children in your vehicle which caused me to have to get another vehicle with 3 rows of seats since they all were in car seats or boosters. So I'd say the expense is the greatest con, but the pros are tremendous, we have so much fun, and they are all so special to me. Not looking forward to the college days though. To be honest if it wasn't so costly, I'd have another one :)

3 is awesome. For me two was harder! Mine are 8,5 and 2 1/2.
The oldest is lots of help!! I am able to work from home so that is a huge benefit. I wanted a girl and we had two boys so I was going to try till I got her, lol!!!
I would have another but hubby says no!
You will never be ready financially, you will make it work when number 3 comes. Each child is a blessing!!

I know just how you feel. My husband and I debated about a third one and then decided to just go for it. Now I am pregnant and am having twins. Talk about a shocker. I went from debating 3 to having 4. It is a very scary situation but I have found that putting my faith in God has helped me through. I have really had to make myself understand that God wouldn't have given me more than I can handle and I need to accept my situation. Our second daughter is special needs and has had many surgeries (2 open heart and 2 kidney) and I wasn't sure I could deal with that kind of stress either but we have made it through. Ultimatly its Gods choice not yours and if he wants you to have another one or two then nothing you do will keep it from happening. Good luck! Children are a blessing as I'm sure you already know with your two now and it things will happen for a reason.

We had the same debate. I just had our 3rd child 8 weeks ago and would do it over again. I just feel our family is complete now. I can't really tell you why but I feel like a family of 5 is a good number.

Good luck with your decision.
L.

For me there are no pros and cons. I can't even put it like that. Motherhood is such an awesome privilege. I believe every child is a gift from God. If my husband was willing to have more I would. I had 3 for years and then a 4th. I'm 40 years old and would love to do it a couple more times. I just love my girls so much. Why not experience it again and again? Family is what it's about.

Suzi

Well, we have 3 Wonderful children . I would do it all again. It is a lot more work, adding 1 more has made me more tired and we go in three different directions now. But , it's a great busy!!!! The third is just like you first and second, it takes time to adjust. Our #3 is 27 months now . He is such a joy. I would say the Pros are love, another play mate on those can't get out day. Cons, cost more to go to the movie , kiddie park and Dr. Etc.... but if you are finacially able. You have nothing to worry about. Something else to think about, the other kids...... are they needy or do you think they will be open to sharing their time ??? Good Luck

A.~ Our #3 was more God's choice than mine! I was breastfeeding, on the pill, and taking it FAITHFULLY! There are almost 4 years between our 1st and 2nd children, so I didn't have any doubt in my mind but that a 3rd would only come when *I* was ready. But, 12 months after the birth of #2, I was pregnant with #3. They're 21 months apart, and are inseparable! It was a shock, but one I got used to before she was born. And I would not trade it for the world! The only thing is, now I almost wish the first 2 had been closer in age. . . Some say that if you have an odd # of kids, someone is always left out. I disagree. No matter the # of kids you have, someone will be left out at times. That's life.
Having 3, I look at my brother's family of 1 child and think "He doesn't even have a CLUE! One is *SO* easy ~ I know!" Parents with 2 are blessed, because you have a 1 parent to 1 child ratio. But then, with 3, chaos insues! Suddenly, there is one extra to try to watch! But it's great. And I know that the families with 4+ kids think "She hasn't got a CLUE!" about me!!! My ob/gyn now has 6 (I guess she practices what she preaches!) and when I was pregnant with #3, she said that having 4 is about the same as 3. But I'm not willing to find out!!! =) Good luck with whatever you decide, and know that what you *do* decide will be right for *you*!