Five Year Old Still Having a Hard Time with Her Letters

i would talk with her teacher more about this.. a few of my friends are teachers - preK , frist grade, third grade.. and all of this sounds pretty normal to me.. yes kids now are expected to know more by each specific grade level than they were years ago but its only october, she isnt even halfway through the school year, and its kindergarten, to me knowing half of her letters sounds pretty good.. I would personally go talk to her teacher and see if there are other reasons why this teacher would think she was "behind" the other students.. I also agree with what others have said about her being nervous.. i was like that my first few years of school.. id get straight A's but not do well in class participation.. i would know the answer but not raise my hand because i was afraid it wasnt right.. she could have gotten a letter wrong one time and now shes afraid of that happening again

Run to Target and get Leap Frog Letter Factory videos! They are for auditory and visual leaners. My daughter loved them and they really helped her grasp letters.

I teach kindergarten now, and it is not what it was 5 or 10 years ago, let alone 30 when I was there. Kindergarten is now what 1st grade used to be. Due to government expectations your child will be considered behind in most schools. Is your child on the mature or immature side? If she is socially young, and lagging behind in other developmental areas, you may want to consider giving her another year to grow. Did she go to preschool? That may be a good place for her this year.

Children should not be expected to know their entire alphabet when they enter kindergarten, but that is where things are headed. The stress of an academic kindergarten and pressure from home may be too much for her. She might just need another year to fall in love with learning and be developmentally ready to grasp these concepts. If she is unwilling to participate in class activities or discussion, that you know she can handle in the home setting, it might be that she is just not ready to perform in the group setting. Another year in a structured pre-school might allow her to be at the head of the class next year. It would be sad to have her feel like she is already behind everyone from the get-go.

I don't know your child, and there are several other questions I would ask if she were in my class, so I would speak with the teachers and get a more indepth understanding of what is going on. If she is behind the other kids in academics and social behaviors I would strongly suggest taking her out for a year. Think about how she will always be behind her peers in maturity, and when she is 15, 16, 17 that could be a real problem. Your decision should include thoughts about how this will impact her when she is older.

Good luck

I have to admit, J., that I'm chuckling over your choice of words. That your daughter is "still" having a hard time with her letters. Even the smartest of kindergarteners can have trouble with their letters because it's normal/typical. She may simply need some more time and that's all right. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with her, okay? She's ONLY five, not already five.

That doesn't mean that some assessments aren't in order, of course. If she's having some issues it's better to catch them now. And it will NOT MEAN that there's something wrong with her. Only that she may need a little extra help and/or time. Also remember that at this age, our children are still learning things by rote memory. That's a lot of information, especially during kindergarten classes, that they have to remember.

She's just in kindergarten and the school year is new. Give her a little time. The teacher may be having trouble getting her to respond because she lacks self-confidence and is still getting comfortable in the classroom situation. A special ed assessment won't hurt, but I think she just needs more time to adjust to school.

My son was a late summer birthday, and it took him until Dec of kindergarten for the light bulb to go off and for him to know all the letters and actually start reading. My daughter missed the deadline and started K when she was almost 6, but looking back, she "got" the letters and reading at exactly the same age, around 5 1/2. So don't worry too much about that right now.

As for the not answering the questions, I can think of a few things to check on:
1. how is her hearing? They wanted to hold my son back in the 3s because they said he couldn't think for himself when the teacher asked him questions or told him to do something. I would tell him to do things and he did them just fine. I was shocked to learn he couldn't hear a darn thing the teacher said to him because of fluid in his ears and would repeat the other kids or just ignore her. Once we fixed the hearing he was just fine.

2. Does the teacher make her nervous? My son is very outgoing. His first grade teacher made it her mission to make every child recite their phone number in class. We moved recently, so the phone number was new to him and not surprisingly, he didn't know it at first. We worked on it, and after getting several notes about him not knowing it, finally I wrote back that he had learned it. The next day I got a note home that I was wrong and he couldn't recite it. I pulled him aside and asked him to tell me his phone number. He said it over and over. I asked him why he wouldn't tell Mrs. G. He smiled and said she made him nervous and he forgets when she asks him. The next day I wrote her a note that he was nervous. What do you know, he could do it.

3. My nephew will selectively ignore us when we talk to him and ask him to do things. He does this at school too. When his parents tell him to do something he mostly does it. I don't know if he is shy but I think he just wants to do what he wants to do.

i really do think though that if you give your daughter some time, she will mature and do just fine.

Have you tried Leap Frog's Letter Factory videos? They are about 20 minutes long and my son loved them. He would sing all the letter songs throughout the day.

My daughter didn't "get it" until about halfway through kindergarten.

When I started kindergarten - no one knew their numbers or letters.
That's what we were in school for.
And there was no preschool.
Now - some kids know this stuff coming into kindergarten.
But - that does NOT mean that the kids that don't know them are 'behind'.
Your daughter has a 'wait and see' style of learning.
My son is this way too.
The 1st 10 weeks of every school year the teachers tell me he's so quiet and he needs to speak up.
Then the rest of the year they have a hard time getting him to shut up.
For many kids, the reading and writing don't 'gel' till second grade.
My son struggled with it, but then took off 2nd half of 2nd grade.
By third grade he was reading Harry Potter on his own, and he's been at an advanced reading level ever since.
Just keep reading with/to her.
Make it fun and she won't even realize she's learning.

J., try a computer game. That is what helped it "click" in my younger son's head. Back then, it was DK's "Bear and Penguin" game called "I Want To Read". Perhaps they have something similar to that.

Please don't worry about the teacher thinking your daughter is "stupid". I'm sure she sees wonderful traits in your daughter, including that she is intelligent! Some things just take some time.

When they finish the testing, you might ask for an evaluation with the speech therapist. Spoken speech is not only what speech therapists work with - they also work with receptive and expressive language. Help in this area could also open up her mind to letters and numbers and how they work.

Good luck!!
Dawn

I wouldn't push it too hard - that will just lead to more stress. However, you can surround her with the opportunity for it to soak in. When you read to her, run your finger along under the words. Label things in your house - like a sign in the bathroom that says "Wash your hands" or put her name on her bedroom wall. These things don't help with the alphabet directly, but they do help her to "get" that letters MEAN something.

Also, get a set of alphabet flashcards, and tape them to her bedroom wall. Now the shapes are familiar. Make it fun - sing the alphabet with her while you hang them. Sing it backwards. Sing it in a funny voice - all while pointed at the right letters. Sing the alphabet while you brush her teeth. It'll still soak in at her own rate, but it will be silly and fun, instead of stressful.

(Incidentally, my first grader still gets her lowercase b's and d's, and q's, p's and g's mixed up sometimes.)

Is this her first time learning in a classroom setting? If so, she is not only learning academics but also appropriate classroom behaviors. That is a lot for a child to process at one time. It is not unusual for a 5 year old to not be able to write their letters correctly or to know the alphabet fully in order at the start of the year. With the 9/1 cutoff, you daughter is one of the youngest in Kindergarten, which is also significant to her current classroom performance. Personally, I would not be overly concerned about it this early in the year. The most important thing for her at home is a regular routine, positive reinforcement, and building positive self esteem. Let her watch the LeapPad alphabet videos, sing the alphabet song some and let it go for now. You do not want her to stress out where she does not enjoy school and learning. Most important, you do NOT want her to think she is stupid by any words or actions from you, as that will play in her head over and over and over again for years to come and will be a huge roadblock. Your daughter sounds quite normal.

My guess is your daughter is being made to feel stress over the fact that she doesnt know all her letters after two months of Kindergarten and this is interfering with her learning. It could make her so nervous she has trouble following directions. My son doesn't follow directions unless he is 100% sure he knows EXACTLY what to do. He has trouble in math because he gets nervous he's a little unsure about the answer. The most important thing right now is to make her feel relaxed about it. Stop going over them at home, dont do anything but let her watch a fun video (Leapfrog has a DVD) I teach kindergarten and not every child knows all their letters after a few months of Kindergarten, why are you worried about this? You say she knows half her letters? Why is the teacher worried? How much experience does the teacher have? Unless there are other indications that there are problems?? If she is struggling to learn her shapes and colors, and to recognize her first name, then the teachers can look at her more carefully. Otherwise have the teacher lighten up.
Let it go for a while, focus on her strengths, is she good at sports? getting along with other children?

When my son was learning his letters I made an alphabet bingo game for him. I had several bingo cards so that the whole family could play and we would cover all the letters after a couple times playing. When we first started playing I would have to show him the letter card that I was calling out but the more we played the less I had to show him the called out letter. He loved playing the game so much I made a "what does the letter sound like" bingo game. If you do this I would get everything laminated so it will last longer.

Make flash cards with each letter. Keep them in your purse. Give them to her in the car, at a restaurant, dinner, etc. Have her say the letter and the sound. If she says she doesn't know, you can say this letter is the beginning of the word: Apple. What is the beginning sound?

Have her practice writing in shaving cream - at the dinner table, in the tub, etc. Also do this in rice, with play-do, markers, tooth picks, etc. Get her excited about it - ask her how she wants to practice!

Use everyday situations to practice. Ex: I need the Milk...What does Milk start with?

Good luck!

First you need to relax, at this stage of the fame she isn't going to know them all, she isn't going to remember them all. Honestly I think teachers make it a bigger deal then it really is. Many kids still struggle in 1st grade, and that is normal. Many kids just take a little longer to 'get it' then other kids and neat thing is, that when it finally clicks it's like a little light bulb has gone off in their heads.

Back off on the pressure, it will make it a lot harder for her.

A few good sites that might help and are fun is

This one is free...
http://www.starfall.com/

Then there's Abc mouse club, it's not free but it is worth it. I don't know the cost, I was part of the test group and have had it for free for years.

http://www.abcmouse.com/

Next is Reading Egg, it's pretty could but ABC Mouse Club is better.