K.P.
We fly quite a bit with our son and it's not as bad as you would think! First, I would recommend the following website http://www.abbf.com which allows you to rent baby gear (pack and play, stroller, car seat, etc). You don't want to lug that stuff through the airport. Just bring the car seat. This company delivers your "gear" to your destination so it's there when you arrive at the hotel. If you want to bring the stroller on the airplane, then at least make arrangements for the sleeping and dining-out stuff.
When we fly with our little guy I always bring a new toy and two new books. The novelty keeps him entertained. You will be surprised at how entertaining traveling is to young children- lots of people and sights that are new and interesting.
We also do our best to maintain his schedule. If you have to leave at the crack of dawn, let her get in the car in her jammies and throw clothes in her diaper bag to change later, if she wants to.
Airlines allow you to travel with pre-mixed formula. They have a non-invasive test kit that they use to run it through security, so don't worry about that. Give her s/t to suck on during take-off and landing to keep her ears from popping- bottle, binky, etc. Pack snacks that you know she loves and let her pick something off the snack cart. My son LOVES animal crackers, so we keep them "away" for the week or two before we fly. It's treat to get them on the plane.
More likely than not your daughter will sleep. It's a lot like being in a car. Most importantly, though, don't let her see how anxious you are. If you're relaxed, she will be too. Talk to your doctor and see if they can prescribe something that won't make you drowsy. If you have to take something, then put your husband "in charge".
Enjoy your trip.