Four Year Old Still Bed Wetting

Updated on October 29, 2007
J.H. asks from Columbus, OH
16 answers

We recently tool my four year old son our of pull-ups during night time sleeping. While he was in pull up's he was doing well where he would go several days with a dry a pull up and then have a wet one, but they were rarely soaked. We decided to just get rid of them and start underware (I called it his special night time underware, but it was really regular boys underware.) Anyway, he was doing really well for about a month. Then for the past week and a half he has wet the bed every night. He's soaked...the comforter, sheet, mattress pad and mattress are all wet. We stop him from drinking about an hour before bedtime, he goes to the bathroom before bedtime and then we just started to wake him up to go to the bathroom around 11 pm. When I go to wake him up he is already soaked and he's sound asleep. He hasn't even noticed that he's wet the bed (once again, he has wet everything on the bed...comforter, sheet, mattress pad and mattress). Does anyone have any suggestions on how to help with this?

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D.

answers from Toledo on

Hi J.,

My cousin had the same problem with her daughter. There didn't seem to be any consistency to it. She had read about allergens to dairy, so for the fun of it she stopped all dairy products. The bed wetting stopped. She has a bit of dairy here and there, milk in cereal, but not on a regular basis. Prior to this experiment, the doc said there was no way dairy would be a factor. So, it is worth a try. I have also read bed-wetting isn't anyone's fault. His bladder could be a bit smaller. Otherwise, he will grow out of it. Try not to stress about it.

D.

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S.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

About a month and a half ago my daughter wet the bed (first time in years) 2-3 times a week for about 3 weeks and hasn't done it since. I don't know what brought it on and I don't know what stopped it but such is life. I'm sorry I don't have any advice for you, I do know how frustrating it is though.

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T.P.

answers from Canton on

It's normal for some kids to do this. My 7 yr. old son still wets the bed on occasion. Kids are just really heavy sleepers, and sometimes don't feel the urge to go when sleeping so peacefully. Their bodies aren't mature enough to recognize that they have to go, sometimes. I wouldn't be concerned, I know it's a pain to keep washing everything, but it's something that he'll have to grow out of.

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S.O.

answers from Cleveland on

I am unfortunately going through the same thing, but my son is 5 and still wetting at night. We don't have day time accidents at all. My pediatrician recommended some sort of special mattress pad, but Like your son, he sleeps right through it all and rarely has a clue that he is wet!

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S.W.

answers from Cincinnati on

It is more common for boys to wet the bed at night than girls and I have been told by my doctor that bedwetting isn't considered an issue until about age five/six. It may seem that he's too old to be wetting the bed, but it is more common than you think. Our son was similar to yours. We didn't let him have big drinks after dinner time and we took him to the toilet when we were going to bed (about 11pm). Sometimes we would find that he had already wet the bed and our doctor said it is because bedwetting often occurs before 11pm. He suggested taking our son to the toilet before and after reading his bed time story. We tried this for a while, but he often had emptied his bladder. However, sometimes he had not.
Our son has outgrown wetting the bed now that he's five, but I thought that it would last forever. I hated cleaning his bed sheets and covers everyday! The most important thing to remember is to stay calm about it and keep your son de-stressed about it because punishing or any negative reenforcement actually stresses the child more and makes them more likely to wet the bed. If absolutely nothing works, they actually have invented bedwetting alarms to help train children to wake up and use the toilet. This is meant for older children, however. Hang in there!

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C.H.

answers from Dayton on

hi J.,

my name is C.. i read your request, and felt i had to respond. i have 4 boys, now ages 15 yrs to 27 years. they ALL wet the bed until they were between 5 yrs and 8 yrs. i also have 2 brothers, and 4 nephews(2 on each side of the family) that did the same. while my boys were little, i learned that bedwetting problems are alot of the time inherited, especailly in boys. sure enough, after checking into it, i found my dad had had the problem, as well as my boys' father(and his brother..and their own father))....he(my boys' dad) wet until much older than they were. cutting off their drinks, i can assure you, doesn't matter. i had tried everything! i feel 4 out of 4 of my own, plus my own mom, and former sister-n-law trying the same tactics when my brothers and nephews were little, and nothing working, it can't be from late night drinking. just try to be extra patient. i know it is extremely frustrating!!!!! but he will stop eventually. try getting a mattress protecter(plastic). it helps save the mattress anyway. i can guarantee your little boy probably feels horrible, though he might not show it. he is getting to the age where it is going to start becoming embarrassing. so it is going to be hard enough for him to deal with his own feelings on the subject.

good luck and take care,

C.

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W.C.

answers from Lexington on

This may just be a problem of sleeping too soundly, it may be that he's growing and thus can't control, or it may be a dysfunction of sphincter muscle (sp?)..... had a cousin that wet the bed until he was 13 because his bladder was disproportionate to his body until he went through puberty...wasn't his fault, but a medical issue. If he's perfectly potty trained otherwise, I would DEFINITELY take him to the pediatrician for this....

GOOD LUCK! Have a blessed day :)

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M.E.

answers from Lexington on

i would say stop his fluid intake a few hours before bedtime and continue with the bedtime potty routine and waking him up to potty. sounds like he is a very sound sleeper and just doesn't realize he needs to go. i'm not exactly sure where you get them, but I've heard that are alarms that you can use that go off as sson as they get wet. they alert then child to get up and go potty. i guess they are built into the matress pad or something. they might have them at baby's are us or on-line some where.

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L.

answers from Cleveland on

When my son was about four, the same thing happened to him. He was completely potty trained, but wet during the night, and sometimes during naps. I think it is just because they slip into such a deep sleep so fast.
My son was worried about wetting the bed and always wanted to wear pull ups when he went to sleep, but I thought he would never overcome this if I did that. So I went and bought "rubber pants" The kind we had when we were small. (I think I found them at a garage sale. They are plastic really, and they used to put them over cloth diapers. I'm sure they are still available.
Anyhow, I put them on over his PJs, or even over his clothes at nap time, just to give him the security that he was "protected". He stopped wetting at night and after a few weeks, he didn't need them anymore.

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J.N.

answers from Dayton on

My son always needs adjusted when he starts to wet in the bed at night. I go to a group in Enon. ###-###-####

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

I don't know how to help you, just wanted to let you know that we are in the same boat with my 4 year old. I find that if he is worried about something, or ANYTHING at all has changed even the slightest bit, including it has been longer than normal since he has seen his Granny (his fav. grandma), that he wets the bed more. Normally, it's something bigger, like he was doing really good, stayed dry 2 weeks straight, and then he was soaking through pull-ups and the sheets and all just before he started preschool. He wet his bed every night for a month and half after that. He got better, then I got a new job, and the wetting the bed started over. His doctor said not to worry about it, some kids, potty train at night much later, up to the age of 8-10 years old!!! (UG if this goes on that long!) We too encourage min. amounts of fluid before bed, some is needed with taking his nightly meds and teeth brushing, and require him to pee before going to bed. Its the last thing on the list before he goes to sleep!
I would say to investitate to see if anything is bothering him, otherwise keep on encouraging and possibly go back to pull ups. Do you have a matress pad on the bed that doesn't leak water so you can at least save the matress???

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E.J.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi J., this is a stressful situation. I was having this same problem with my 4 year old. When I took him for his 4 year old visit this past August she said that it can be one of two things; 1. he may just be a heavy sleeper or 2. his bladder may be as big as other children so there for when its full when hes asleep he just goes. So during the night his father and I was getting him up atleast 3 times. This did not include him going to the bathroom before bed at 9:00. Now after about 3 months of doing this we have had fewer accidents with wetting the bed. He is starting to get up on his on to go to the bathroom. I was beginning to think that he had an issue but his pediatrician said that they don't usually start checking for bladder issues until they are around 7 and they are still wetting the bed. Now I don't know if this varies from dr to dr but this is according to his dr. Hope this helps.

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R.C.

answers from Cleveland on

Well, until he starts having to go on sleepovers, I guess your only solution would be to put the pull-ups back on. Stick to the schedule you made, and eventually it'll work out and you can switch back. Otherwise, since it's only been going on for a week, consider any other changes your son has been going through. As for the drinking before bedtime, best to cut it off 2 hours before hand, not one.

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P.B.

answers from Dayton on

I would put the pullups back on and let it go. Why have him wake up wet and do all the extra laundry. Does it really matter if he wets at night at this point in time?

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K.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

Just a thought....I had a friend that has a four year old boy. She also has 5 month old twins, who require a lot of attention (imagine that!!). He recently started having a lot of accidents, and they could not figure out why. One day they sat down with him, and discovered that he was "missing mommy!!" :( Anyway, my thought was, I noticed that you said you work occasionally out of the home, has anything changed?..Ie have you started working more, or has your schedule changed?? Good luck

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L.C.

answers from Lexington on

First of all you need to have him checked out by your doctor to make sure there is no medical problem. Next, preventing him from drinking only an hour before bedtime is not enough. If he goes to bed at 10 then he shouldn't have any drinks past 8.

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