Getting 11 Month Old to Nap on His Own

i noticed that you don't live in st louis, but here we have St Luke's Sleep Center, and I ended up going when my son was 8 month old. he just would not go down on his own and stay asleep.
I had to schedule an appointment, but you could look to see if there is a sleep center near you, or call St Luke's Hospital in Saint Louis to speak with someone or to find a place near you. It was a life saver, and the way I put my son to sleep was more comforting then letting him scream it out for so long off the bat.
(we started with just 3 minutes of crying, then we worked it up to 10 minutes or so over the course of a few days. We just had to go in and pat him, but not say a word, and not stay in the room for more than 30 seconds, or a minute, i can't re,ember which) But anyway, good luck!

Get a book called.... Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Dr. Richard Ferber. It was a lifesaver for me...years ago when my youngest started waking up in the night and demanding hours of my time, rocking, singing, walking, until she would go back to sleep!!! The book gives you a step by step method that I can tell you had us enjoying a full nights sleep within about 3 days!!! There were some tears ( hers and MINE) during the process..but it certainly paid off in the long run.
The idea is, after you put them to bed you dont interact with them...no talking...no eye contact...dont pick them up. If they need diapers changed, you do it in the bed...no rocking...no "rewards" to them for getting you into the room. Just firmly but kindly put them back to bed with their lovey ( good idea!!!) and leave the room. You lengthen the time that you allow them to cry each time....it seems like we started with something like a minute...and added 30 seconds or a minute to it each time. You WILL survive this...and so will that precious little boy of yours!!
Good luck...let us know how it goes.
R. Ann

I hope you get some good advice because my 10 1/2 month old son either gets rocked or bounced by me or my husband EVERY TIME he takes a nap or goes to bed for the night. He is getting too big for this. He weighs 25 lbs. Our backs need a break. So I'm anxious to hear any suggestions other than letting him cry it out. Good luck.

Good Morning S., First congrats for your stick-to-a-tive-ness ( fonnix Wurks fur me ) on conceiving your little angel man.
You started off on the right track Monday by what you did! You kept to the routine! I am not sure if you rock while he listens to his story but that may help get him drowsy. But before you even start your routine you might say something like," come on Baby lets get ready for nap time" then continue with story and music etc.
It takes patience & persistence! Keep to your routine don't deviate even a little bit unless it is really important to you.

He will cry naturally, reassure him he is ok and you are there, then walk out again, (after kisses of course) Oops lay him down if he is standing up ya know...lol

I would love to be able to rock our youngest gr son to sleep sometimes, but his daddy started the leg bounces and he wants no part of rocking and I can bounce that long :)) He just turned 10 Mo's so he gets hugs, kisses and music to go down for a nap.

Hang in there S., he will catch on and be fine, It's only been one day!!
God Bless you and your precious family
K. Nana of 5

Maybe you should shorten the rocking time 30,25,15,10,5, at first. Then as hard as it is put him in his crib.. he will get use to it. Going in and checking may not help him. It is helping you. Have a baby moniter close he will be okay. Give it some time and he will get use to the new routin.

You could try transitioning him on the floor. Make the room safe and make a little nap nook on the floor with whatever will make him comfortable. Then lay down with him. Start out snuggling very close until he falls asleep then move on to snuggling for a few minutes and scooting away, but staying in contact (ie. rubbing his back). Eventually, you could work up to just laying down next to him for a few minutes, without touching him and then getting up and leaving before he falls asleep. Make sure that he is in a safe environment and that you have a way of knowing when he wakes up - monitor or if he sits up and starts calling for you.

As for the crying, I've always gone to my daughter when she cries. I think that it reassures her that when she does need me I will come and over time I think that it has helped her to not cry so much if she doesn't know where I am.

I hope this helps. I would also recommend The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. It has some great ideas on making sleep less of a struggle without the stress, to you or your child, of letting them cry.

We were in your boat about 6 months ago. My son was used to being rocked and did not know how to put himself to sleep. We used the "crying it out" method as well. It was horrible for a while, but eventually he got it. At night he goes right to sleep now, but he still cries for a bit for naps. My doc says is totally normal for some kids to resist sleep and continue to cry a bit. I would say stick to it and it will get better. I know it's heartbreaking to listen to their cries!

S.,

I feel your pain - I just started the crying out with my son Sunday night. He already went down for naps on his own, but not at night. It was a long, VERY HARD night for my husband and I. I felt the same way - it seemed as if everytime we went in he would calm down and then get even MORE upset when we left. I just wanted to pick him up so bad!! It took a total of 2 hours to get him to sleep. BUT - he had the best night of sleep he has ever had - he wasn't his usual restless self and he slept later than he normally does. The second night was easier and he still got a great night's sleep. It really helps to have someone to help you through it - if it isn't your husband see if a family friend could help (just make sure they can support you and not make you feel worse when your child cries) Good luck to you - I know it's not easy.

J.

My recommendation is to continue what you started. They are little for only so long. And, it can always be an option to have your husband rock the baby when he is home. That will give you a break. They have proven that babies that are nurtured more when they are young, tend to be less clingy or dependent when they are older. So, enjoy this young time while he is allowing you to hold him, because it won't be long before not only will he not want to be on your lap, but he won't want kisses anymore either. As a mother of 7, I never tire of holding my babies. One would think that it would be easier to put them down once a person has had so many. But, each baby are their own little person and they grow up so fast. Fortunately, with having others to also rock the baby, I get some stuff done. With having my first, it seemed I never got anything done, and needed to put him down more. If I could have, I would have hired a maid. Hold that little one and you will never regret it. Kymberli

When my oldest daughter was about the same age, I was hugely pregnant with our second and couldn't rock her anymore. We did the same thing, read her a book and put her in her bed and left the room. You just have to be consistant and strong. When you cave in your son will know that the more he cries he can get you to pick him up again. Start doing it at nap time and get him used to going down at naptime by himself, then after he has accomplished that work on night time. Believe me it is easier in the daytime and when that happens, night time won't be so bad. He will cry and it's okay. You did right by going in and soothing him, just don't say anything to him and keep it up. It may take several times. Eventually he'll fall asleep. Be consistant. Good luck and God Bless.

I haven't read other responses. My appologies if this is redundant.

What worked for my son was to simply put a mattress on the floor instead of a crib, so falling out of bed would present no harm. Then I would simply lie down with him until he fell asleep. This always worked and before he was 2 y/o he would lay in bed and I would sit in a chair and either sing lullabies or read to him as he fell asleep. Before he was 3 y/o he was able to go to sleep on his own after we had prayers and a tuck-in with a kiss good-night.

I feel the important thing to consider is that children under the age of 3-5 y/o do not feel equipped to negotiated life without their 'expert' by their side. They don't want to go anywhere without the one who makes their decisions for them, not even into dreamland. In order to feel secure, a child simply needs to know that you are available and are confident to handle everything they can't (even if that means you are confident in your faith that God can handle everything you can't). If you are insecure about the experimental approach, the child will certainly feel insecure about it. So, you need to find a method that you are certain of and somehow let the child know that someone will respond to him if needed. I don't think you need to worry about rushing anything. My son is 22 and has been going to bed on his own most of his life.

This reminds me of the time my sister-in-law asked the doctor when her 20 m/o would wean himself. The doctor simply said, "Don't worry. He won't take them to college with him." She relaxed and he weaned himself within a month or so. My son weaned himself at 19 months. He had only nursed at bed time for some time. One day I slipped into my nightgown during the day after a bath and it triggered him to nurse. So, I slept in street clothes for 2 weeks and he never asked for it again! So, just pay attention. Often the child will teach you what you need to know about being a parent!

I also like to tell parents everywhere that the best help I ever found as a parent was in the book, The Family Virtues Guide, by Linda K. Popov. It teaches the strategies that help you hear your child and set clear boundaries at the same time. I cannot imagine how tough parenting would have been without that book. You can learn more at www.VirtuesProject.com.

Good luck and never stop celebrating that beautiful baby!

Routine is the answer. Before you put him down for a nap, make sure you have a quiet time maybe reading to him or giving him a bath. Something that makes him know it is time to sleep. Also Keep up this routine until he knows that it is time for him to go to his own bed. Ask him to bring you a book that he wants to hear or pick out a favorite game (a quiet one). This worked for me.