Getting 3 Month Old Twins to Sleep

Updated on October 18, 2010
A.C. asks from Johnstown, PA
10 answers

I have 3 month old twins that both love to fight going to sleep. My son is easier to get to sleep, but my daughter fights it to the bitter end. Once they are alseep they sleep all night and only wake up around 6 to eat and then go back to sleep until about 9 or 10. I would like to try the "cry it out" method, but they sleep in the same crib and wake eachother up. We have been trying to hold them until they go to sleep, but as soon as we lay them down they wake up and SCREAM so I pick them up and hold them until they are asleep again. This could go back and forth for 2 hours or more. My husband does not seem to have the patients to hold the kids when they are crying or fussing if it lasts longer than 5 or 10 minutes, so he will just go lay them down in the crib crying already...and I can't hold them both. I know they sleep better when they are together because when they sleep they face eachother and are almost always touching. Does anyone have advice on getting them to sleep easier or on the cry it out method with twins that sleep in the same bed.

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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Do you swaddle them? If not, you might try it. I found it especially useful when tranferring from my arms to the crib. Wrap them up before you rock them to sleep. Then the swaddle keeps their arms and legs from flopping around while you transfer to the crib, and keeps them feeling warm and toasty. Pretty soon they'll be strong enough to kick out of the swaddle when they wake, and that's fine. The swaddle is just for the transfer to the crib at this age.

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K.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Have you tried one of those aquatic music soothers that attachs right to the crib. My son had one when he was a baby and it did the trick for him. If fussed we just hit the button on that and it soothed him right back to sleep.

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N.H.

answers from Harrisburg on

When my twin boys were that age I had them in separate cribs because they woke each other up a lot. You're probably going to have to (within the next few months) put them into separate cribs once they start moving around - it becomes a safety issue. My twins were terrible sleepers so I let them CIO when they were 5-6 months. I did separate them completely (different rooms) for this but put them back together after they were sleeping well. I know some people who just keep them together when they CIO so that they get used to sleeping through the other one crying. This was the best thing I ever did, saved my sanity, because I didn't have a lot of help from my DH either (he works long hours) and it's almost impossible to soothe 2 babies at the same time. I was also a walking zombie until then because of night wakings. I'd research different CIO methods but we put them down and let them cry for around 15 minutes and if they hadn't gone to sleep went in and gave them a rub and told them to go to sleep (and made sure nothing was wrong). With mine, they were asleep the first night in 15-30 minutes. If they woke in the night I did the same thing. Good luck!

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K.T.

answers from Scranton on

Hi A., boy have we been where you are now! Our twin girls are now 2 1/2yo and we also had the same sleep issues. Our little ones slept in the same bed until they were almost 3 mos, but they would wake each other. Our nights were long and sleepless and we decided to put them in seperate cribs in different rooms, then we were gradually able to move them into the same room still in seperate beds. One of our little one requires more sleep than the other and sleeps through her sister's talking, singing and fussing. Also, have you tried swaddling? This may help if they are in seperate cribs. Wishing you patience and sleep in the future. Best of luck.

Katina, mom of Kenzie 4 1/2, Payton and Morgan 2 1/2.

P.S. It does get easier:)

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E.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi A.:
{{{Hugs}}} - hang in there, getting twins to sleep is challenging but they *will* get better at it (and someday in the near future you'll feel like you need a bullhorn to wake them up and get them ready for school on time!). At three months, their tummies are still quite small so they will still be waking out of hunger, but one thing that's worth trying to reduce the struggles is to try putting them down to sleep *earlier* - it sounds like your daughter could quite possibly be *over-tired* and that's why she's fighting sleep so stubbornly (this is counter-intutive but it was helpful for us - the putting them to sleep before they get over-tired is the one thing I remember from Dr. Marc Weissbluth's book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy CHild")

All kids are different, but our twins surprised us by how often one could sleep through the other's crying

Good luck! Things *will* get better, I promise!

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

The CIO method only works if you let them CIO! Put them down, mama! They will love to be secure sleepers when they get the hang of it. At this age, holding them until they sleep is training them to need you to hold them in order to fall asleep. They are sleeping so well and so long already, (congrats) that CIO would be perfect for you-they don't seem hungry etc.

Don't wear down your hubby. Papa needs rest to sustain twins all day-you too. This could get worse if you don't let them self sooth. It will get worse at first because they are used to you hanging in there and holding them for up to 2 hours. Once they learn that bed time is bed time (3 nights to a week) they won't cry so long. A little crying before sleep is fine.
Could you separate them until they fall asleep and then put them together?

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E.F.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I can imagine how exhausted you both are, but it is much too young to let a baby CIO at this age. I'd suggest that you read Ferber's Solving Your Child's Sleep Problems to get a better idea of developing good sleep habits and what is reasonable to expect at each age. Don't be afraid to reach out to friends and family for help. It is a difficult time, and lack of sleep can make post partum depression more likely, and dads are susceptible too. Take turns getting some sleep, and know that this time will pass.

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M.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi A.,

I created a product called the Magic Sleepsuit that is designed for babies who are no longer swaddled, yet still like to be cozy and secure in order to sleep better. Typically, babies grow too big, start to squirm out of the swaddle or want more mobility at around 3 months of age, which is the age I suggest to start using my product. It helps those babies who like being swaddled and have difficulty sleeping on their own. I would offer to you to go to my web site and read about it (www.magicsleepsuit.com). We also recently teamed up with Kim West "The Sleep Lady" whose techniques are more gentle that the strict cry it out method. Her books include "Good Night, Sleep Tight" and "52 Sleep Secrets for Babies". We believe that combining a good routine with the Magic Sleepsuit should help bebies sleep better and longer.

Good Luck!

M.

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S.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

My twins were in the same crib until 6 weeks. We put them in different crinbs but with the ends of the cirbs close to each other. One still has difficulty going down to sleep but it only lasts 5minutes. They other one will fall asleep with the crying becuase she is use to it.

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L.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

It's totally normal for them to have trouble falling asleep at this age, but you can help them along by starting a good, calm, quiet bedtime routine for them to get used to that will 'cue' them that it's time for sleep. I can't believe they are sleeping through the night already! Wow. By the way, I think it's great that you have them sleeping together - probably part of the reason they do sleep so well (once their asleep). Good luck!

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