Wine glass charms are good. There's also a wine chiller I've seen - it's a long glass (I think) piece, shaped like an icicle with a typical wine bottle stopper on top. You put it in the freezer, then remove the cork and insert the chiller in the bottle, which keeps it cold when it's out during a party. It's for keeping a chilled white wine chilled, or for quick-chilling a red wine ever so slightly.
A set of olive oil dipping dishes and different herbed oils? I've seen 2-sectioned dishes, one large and one small, for olives and their pits. Useful.
A wine chiller bucket for the above wine?
A nice bread basket with a tile for oven warming - put the tile in the oven with the hot foods, then put it in the bottom of the basket to keep the rolls warm.
Someone gave M. a set of little dishes with a small section in each - the dishes are different colors. Each party guest can put cut veggies or snack pieces in the main part of the dish, and then put a little dip or hummus in the small section. It lets each person walk around with their plate and "double dip" their veggies in their own supply of dip without double dipping in the community bowl! The different colors allow you to put your dish down for a second and still find it later - same idea as wine charms.
Cocktail napkins with a funny saying appropriate to her and her parties, or J. with something elegant - depends on her taste.
Coasters?
Small votive or tea light candles for decorating the table?
If you J. poke around a gourmet store or even some fancy liquor stores, you may find some good ideas.
I think a basket of accessories sounds really nice so go with your gut.