Myself Going Back to Work - Amelia, OH

Going back to work is such a tough decision. When I got pregnant my husband had accepted a new job here in Ohio and we moved from Indiana. We thought I wouldn't have to work, unfortunately his job isn't paying as much as we thought it would and I do have to work in order for us to live. My son was born 2 weeks ago. I've recovered very quickly from my C-Section and I'm going back to work in 2 weeks. It kills me to think about leaving my baby with someone else. I know it's only for a few months but so much happens in that time. But I gotta do what needs to be done to maintain providing for my son. Just take it one day at a time.

You could just go part time. This will take some of the stress off of your husband and make things easier too. Also you could always find another daycare to work at so that way you can work and still be with the both of them.

I know how you feel. My son will be 2 next month and my daughter is 8 months old. I have always worked and went to school up until the birth of my son. After that i just went to school until I found out I was pregnent with my daughter when he was almost 5 months. After that I started babysitting in my home to be here. After the birth of my daughter I stopped that. Now I work about 11-15 hours a week, while my husband has the kids. I just started that. I am going back to school in January and I do not want to. I feel bad for leaving them. I know since I am a senior, that I need to finish. Once I have my degree it will be much easier for us, but I am bnot ready to work and leave the kids. I also want one more. I wish that I could just wait until they are in school. I can, but it will be tough with having to pay my student loans. That is the main reason that I am going back now.. You are not alone!!

See if any family members and friends can watch them while you go to work. If not enroll them into a daycare close to your job.

Hi A.....try a home based business that gives you the flexibility to work around your husband's schedule and the ability to make some good money! I have been with Discovery Toys for 15 years....it provides an awesome income, great products for my family and the flexibility to keep them a priority....check out my website at www.discoverytoyslink.com/selltoysfast or feel free to email me if you have any questions....good luck with your search! C.

I was having the same issue. I have degrees in Criminal Justice and Sociology and my husband has had to work like crazy to support us. We are finally at the point where my getting a job wouldn't cost more than I would make but I love being able to help at my daughter's school (she's in first grade) and I love that my kids don't go to daycare. My husband is torn between being happy I am home with them and wanting to not feel fully responsible for the finances. I decided to become an Usborne Consultant and LOVE it. Usborne Books are fantastic books and the opportunity came up quite by accident. I make my own schedule. I work around what I have going on with my kids. I plan things for times when my husband can be with the kids. Sometimes I even take my son with me. We do home shows but I mostly focus on schools right now. For the Christmas season I am showing my books at Retirement Centers so they can purchase for grandkids. Anyway, if this sounds interesting to you take a look at my website www.feed-a-brain.com. If you want any further info you can e-mail me at ____@____.com. I fell in love with the books and it has just been a wonderful situation for my family. Good Luck in whatever you choose.

Hi A.

My name is M. and i have a 2 year old and 1 year old, I have been working part time since My first daughter was 3 months old, I actually like going to work most of the time, it gives me some adult conversations instead of my girls. Well heres the hard part my husband has been working full time to support us and he goes to school full time to be a nurse. So i know how hard it is on your husband because my husband is in the same boat. I just think its nice to get out once in a while with out the kids.

A.,
I am not sure where you are located or what you need to make, but I am starting a cleaning business and have work availabe for you. Evenings, weekends, you can pretty much make your own schedule as long as the cleaning is done by the move-in dates. There are also two work at home sites I would reccomend if the cleaning does not interest you. One is called West.com. I have done work for them and was very pleased. The only cost involved is purchasing headphones. The other site I would recommend is called liveops.com. Please feel free to email me with any questions you might have.

God Bless
J. F.

Hi A.! I am a full time working mom of a six month old and I know how hard it is to leave! You do what feels right to you! My husband works full time also and we considered having me stay home and him getting a second job, but in the end I decided that I would like to continue to work and I work seconds and some weekends and it is rough because we never see one another, but this way our son is not in day care!
I feel like I miss out on so much being gone at work...but no matter what you choose to do there are going to be positives and negatives! All I can say is choose what is best for you and your family!

A.,

I think any mother has a difficult time with this decision. As a "veteran" mom (my daughter is now 15 years old) I have struggled with this decision for years. For the majority of my daughter's life, I worked because I was a single mom. Two years ago my mother was stricken with cancer and I had to prioritize my life. I was able to start working from home and since then I have never looked back. The two years I have spent with my daughter have meant more to me than anything money can buy. I am only sorry that I didn't do it sooner. God gives us this great gift, this miracle of a child. Being responsible to mold this new life into an adult who will go out into the world and leave their mark. You only get one shot at it, make it count and really think about what's most valuable to you. If you are interested, I sell romance products and adult pleasure toys. I am in direct sales, but I have the freedom of having parties around my schedule, making all the money I want or need. As stated by another responder, it's work, especially in the beginning, but the return far outweights the cost! I pray your answer comes to you and you are at peace with whatever you decide.

Many blessing to you
Jenn

I'd suggest working part time as well, and doing what you can to decrease your expenses. Oftentimes we don't realize where all of our money is going until we take a good hard look at it. I've found that if we're not diligent, we end up spending a lot of money on things that we really don't need. Things add up fast. If you just worked a day or two a week, you would not have the expense or hassle of daycare, and it would be easier on your husband and better for your relationship with him, too. If he is constantly worried about the bills and exhausted from working all those extra hours, it will take a toll on him and on your relationship, and he really needs to spend time with your kids, too. They grow up so quickly, and you don't want him to miss it, either. There are a lot of hospitals that would hire you part time, so I suggest looking at that first. Even if the place you want to work doesn't have a posting, go talk to the HR person anyway. Sometimes they will hire a good candidate even if they don't have anything listed. Even if they don't have phlebotomy right now, you could always do something else (HUC, housekeeping, monitor watcher, etc.) until a position opens up. Good luck.

I am a full time working mother. The exposure my daughter gets at her sitters with the other kids makes it easier for me to leave her. (well that and my husband drops her off and picks her up b/c its by his work)

Personally, i dont feel its fair to the husband to have to earn all the income if you all cannot live on just one salary. i would never let my husband work a ton of hours so I could stay home. while i know its hard to leave your child, martial stress is harder on a child. coming from a child of divorce and having parents always fighting about money, i feel very strongly about that.

many people suggested part time work or sales type work. i also do that, i'm a demonstrator for Close to My Heart. I hope some day to build my business to leave my full time job b/c I love doing it. but any type of sales business you have to be willing to work at it and keep working at it to make it successful.

As for "taking care of the home" if you go back to work, your husband shouldnt have to work as many hours and then can work around the house to help. my husband and i share lots of housework and you know what? sometimes it doesnt get done. b/c we work full time, my daughter and my husband are my first priority, not the dust bunnies or the dishes. i do that type of stuff after my daughter goes to bed at night.

just my opinion. i know i'm in the minority many times on this board, but just throwing it out there.

You can go back to work any time. Maybe your husband should get a different job so he can work less hours and make more money. I don't think it's fair to leave your baby this young.

Why don't you try doing child care in your home. I am looking into it because I can't stand to leave my kids anymore. You can be home with your kids and make money. Good luck

Hello A.,
I know exactly how you feel !! Only my situation was slightly different. Shortly after my 2nd child was born, my husband and I split. My daughter was 2 years old and my son was 2 weeks old. I stayed home for only 6 weeks before returning to work. Leaving my new baby at a daycare, was horrible. I cried every day. He cried everyday. But, the most important thing when having children, was having the means to be able to take care of them. That was something that I told myself everyday when I left for work. If your husband is pressing you to go to work, then you must be in financial need. Lacking money to take care of a family, puts stress on a marriage. Try sitting down with your husband to come to a compromise (which is also important for a strong marriage). Maybe together the two of you can come up with a plan, where you only need to work a couple of hours a week. Sit down together, and ask him, how much income he thinks that you need, to make him feel better. If you can work as a team, then Im sure going to work a few hours a week wont be so bad. And your marraige will be better because of it. One more thing, I started working for a company, that was built to help add money to a familys income, or give moms the ability to be stay at home moms. Its called Premier Design Jewelry. Its a home party planner, but it is the best company ever !!I make 50 % of everything I sell, and I get paid the night of my show. If you have a 400.00 show, you make 200.00 that night. If you would like more information, let me know. This company has changed my life. I work about 10 hours a week and I make the same money, my sister-in-law makes as a paralegal.

A.!
Its YOUR choice wether you want to go back to work or not. I understand the pressures!

Explain to him that you want to spend time with your kids, I mean you have a newborn baby and want to spend time with the baby. Explain that its stressing you out with him pushing you and that he needs to stop doing that and just talk to you about it and listen to your opinions as well!

I know daycares are very expensive too so you might add that in! Unless you have some family to watch them! and if not find a reasonable sitter *hint hint* lol

Good luck hun!!

Hi A.:
I work full-time, plus an extra 10 hours a week of side work, so that my husband can stay home with the baby. It took us awhile to decide to do it this way, but we found that it was the most logical decision because I make almost double his hourly wage and I also get the benefits. (His industry typically doesn't offer benefits). Why put our baby in part-time daycare so my husband can work 20 hours a week, when I can make that cash in half the time without the expense of daycare?

I hate having to work so much and if I had my choice I'd cut my workload down to part-time, but it's what's best for our situation right now and we realize it's relatively temporary. I hate to be blunt, but I think your husband should suck it up and work the extra hours for now, especially with the addition of a new baby. I hope he appreciates how hard you work at home at a full-time job with a 24/7 shift.

My husband is currently building his own business so he feels like he contributes to the financials in a small way during short-term...in hopes of a long-term switch, when he makes enough money so I can stay home eventually, or cut back to part-time. Maybe you could work towards a similar goal with one of these home sales consultant roles? This way you're steadily building something of your own while you stay at home with the kids? There never seems to be a perfect solution, and it never seems to be easy. But being a mom so rewarding, isn't it? Good luck...