We received two graduation announcements this past week. One is from my cousin who is graduating from college, but whom I do not know personally. This particular family, my aunt (dad's sister) sends announcements out for everything -- requesting money for her college-age children's athletic endeavors (bat-a-thons, etc.) and such. My side of the family agrees that It's a little bit much.
Second grad announcement received from another part of my family, my cousin's son, who is graduating from high school. I don't know my cousin well (they've always lived in another state), and I don't know her son at all.
We are in the midst of undergoing an unplanned bathroom remodel as our shower died on us two weekends ago so money is really tight right now.
What is the etiquette for what I've laid out? Thanks, moms!
Thank you, moms. I'm leaning heavily toward doing what a lot of you said to do: nothing. :)
And just an aside, sadly, part of my family (the send-an-announcement-for-everything) are money-grabbers. I do hate to say it, but even my dad agrees (it's his sister) ... there are some stories I could tell you that would make your eyes roll, lol!
Cash and a card are the norm, but if money is tight, I personally wouldn't feel bad for just sending a card with my congrats and best wishes!!
If you don't know these kids well and don't have extra money to send, just send a nice congratulatory card acknowledging their accomplishments. Don't feel bad about not sending more.
Personally, I would just send a card and maybe a small gift card to Target. Most people do send these just so you can share in their excitement, but there is certainly pressure to send a gift.
If you really don't know the graduates, then there is no need to send anything.
we just sent out announcements. Our thought process wasn't one of looking for gifts or money, but rather not wanting to leave anyone out. We didn't expect to get a response from everybody, but just wanted to be sure we didn't hurt anyones feelings. So, don't feel pressured to send anything.
Just me, but I don't think you need to do anything for either one of these. You do not know either of them personally. If we're not close enough to the graduate to attend the get together, we do not send anything. Don't feel bad about it either, especially if money is tight.
Just because you are invited to something or sent an announcement you do not have to provide a gift. It is customary to provide a gift if you attend something but not obligatory. You do not need to send money if you received an announcement however, you could send them a congratulation/graduation card instead. You can get the cards very inexpensive hallmark sells great cards for .50 cents and $1.00 or you can go to the dollar tree for 2 cards for $1.00.
I never realized that graduation announcements are requests for money. I think many people DO NOT see them as such. You don't have to send anything. Though, a card would be nice. Not necessarry but a nice gesture. adding money or itunes gift card or something would be thoughtful and generous, but is probably not expected.
Graduating college is a great accomplishment, no reason not to shout it from the rooftops, right? I don't think it's about trying to pull in some cash.
Plus, when you order announcements, I think the lowest number you can get is like 50, so that is also why people just start sending them out to everyone and their brother :)
Don't worry about sending anything if you don't want to.
You don't need to send anything or respond to either announcement.
I personally think that is absolutely ridiculous. My step-son is graduating this year and there is no way we would send announcements to extended family, unless it is ones we are close with. Reason being it makes people feel like they are sending money, gift, etc. to someone they don't even know and who wants to do that?
I would do one of a few things...send a congrats card with nothing in it, send maybe $25 it's not much, but I'm sorry if it's family you're not even close with that's enough, or send a gas card of $25 as we all know everyone could use that.
I have an aunt (dads sis in law) who lives far away and I send her pics of my kids. I don't do social media so we do not connect that way. I always send a birth announcement. Sometimes I get something sometimes I don't and I really don't care. At a cousin's wedding I saw this aunt and she thanked me profusely for always including her. She said I am one of the few who do. (I have 32 first cousins on my dad's side). Do not feel obligated to do more than you can. When i graduated from college I received many cards that did not have gifts. I understand if people can't do anything. Its all on them.
Send a card and a small gift, like a $10 giftcard.
Unless it's a legit charity org, I ignore requests for money. As far as gifts, give what you can, don't break the bank to be nice to people who ask for money. A card should be fine. I had no idea people I should be compelled to give money when I see a graduation announcement. No one from my generation ever sent out grad announcements, only to immediate family from out of state. And only when it's an advanced degree. But recently, we've been getting grad announcement for jr high, high school, etc from extended family. We've been ignoring them. Oops.
Hello, Personally, I think it's rude for people to send these to people they hardly know. It's just a way to get money. You could either ignore them, or send a congratulations card.
Good luck.
K. K.
Annoucements are not generally intended as a gift grab. Most people truly do send them out simply to let people know the various mileposts attained in their family's life. I would send warm congratulations via greeting card - you can even say something like - I'd love to meet you one day - since I just adore your "mom" "grandmother" etc.
If you really feel a gift is called for (I don't) send them a $10 amazon giftcard. you can get nearly anything on amazon.com and since they're both young they probably do a lot of shopping online. Normally I'd suggest a giftcard to a bookstore - but since everyone has kindles and e-readers these days.....
I think it is tacky for people to send these announcements "invoices" when they hardly know you.
I'm all for it for close family or at least family I am in contact with often.
If I were as removed from contact, etc as you say you are with these people, I'd probably just send a nice card. If I got past the insult of being sent an invoice, I might, probably not but might, send a very small gift card.
How sad that so many people [responders to this question] think sharing the most precious and proud moments of your family's life is a crass attempt to get money/gifts. That attempting to stay connected with family is viewed as gift grubbing seems rather ugly to me. Negative thoughts beget negative thoughts and actions. Why look at their sharing in such a negative way? I love getting announcements, especially if they include a picture of the graduate, and I usually keep them.
When I received my masters degree in 2008, I made a graduation announcement on my computer and sent it out to the people in my family that share their milestones with me, and a few others that I wanted to include. Not for gifts, but to share my happiness. I treasured the cards and wishes that were sent to me and felt like they added to my joy. I never thought I would finish college let alone obtain a masters degree. My family was military and my parents late in life when they had me, there wasn't money for college. I went back in mid-life and pursued my dreams. Was I proud? Yes...and shared it.
Why do people have hard hearts? I don't want to live and think like that. It doesn't have to be about gifts or money...
Please send these two a lovely card, personalized with a congratulation message and your best wishes for a future of happiness. It will make them and you feel good.
