I have my son who is now 2 and he is the only one we are planning to have. Since my DH has already had another child who is 14 but does not live with us and we rarely get to see, and the huge age difference my little one is basically an only. Any tips or suggestions on raising an Only or directions to links, books or groups would be wonderful.
I, too, have an ONLY. He is 3 1/2. I would love to have another, but my husband isn't interested.:( I would be interested in hearing any good info you come across...I can use all the help I can get!
K.
First off, if he has other kids he gets to play with at daycare or at the park, it's not that big of a deal that he's an only child. Make sure he knows that the decision not to have more children is nothing to do with him, and that you love him. Saying things about "Isn't it nice to have Mommy and Daddy pay attention to only you." And, "It's so nice to get to listen to you without anyone else interrupting us." Will put it into his head that being an only child is wonderful. And, in the event that none of that works, Elmo is an only child. :)
The age gap you have is very close to my two children. I have a 14 year old from a previous relationship and my husband and I have one, now about 1 1/2 old. The oldest one has been an only child but the typical attitude and spoiled behavior he does not have. My advice is to remember you are raising a child, among other things, to be a happy, functioning, health contributor to society. You are raising a child to be someone’s spouse someday. Your baby will not always be your baby.
Get him involved with playgroups, classes, ect. I am an only who was in a lot of classes, and also had close cousins. I do not feel deprived, I feel happy to have relatives who filled the role of sibling without the fighting that siblings often go through. I feel lucky that my parents could afford to send me to pursue my interests without having to provide for my brothers and sisters. Make the most of it. Many "only's" are quite fulfilled!
Hi A.,
I would suggest play groups, community groups, and scouts to heep him involved as he gets older with his peers. Don't waste your life or his with an apologetic attitude, but rather make him feel lucky for beng an only child, and when the time comes address his desires to have a sibling, so that he knows you understand his feelings. Incidentally, those who desire siblings very often wish they didn't have one, once they get one:-)
Playdates are great, but you want to know where to go. I found recently that the library system, http://www.slco.lib.ut.us/ is a great resource for evening and weekend activities, plus there is a bonus---start your little one off reading. They have life size puppet shows, reading circles, tot reading time, and much more. go to your local library and ask or visit the website listed above. Also from the website listed above, there are links for children's safe websites that are built for learning. Have fun, Maybe see you around. I am also part of a moms club that is so far fun for me and my little ones. I could send you info if you want me to.
A.
My daughter is also any only child. I didn't have a hard time finding things to do with other kids when I was a SAHM, but now that I've returned to the work force.... it's really hard to find weekend activities.
I used to take her to the sports complex a couple of times a week for turf time, took her swimming at mom & tot time, gymnastics, etc. All of those now happen when I'm at work. I've not found anything in the valley (not sure where you are located) for weekends yet.
I assume your child is in daycare? If so, at least friendships are being made there. I'm considering moving our daughter to a public facility (we currently have a nanny) just to get her more exposure to other children as well. The nanny takes her to gymnastics twice a week, but that is it.
What does DH stand for?
My husband has a daughter with someone else and she is now 13,I have 2 kids previouse and they are 20,18.ao I know what your going thru. Are son we have together is 5 and there is a huge gap between all three,and we don't see his daughter at all.so I guess what i'm saying is if there never around then our only child will never miss them.So the best thing to do is have play dates with you child.
