Having Trouble Potty Training

My son was almost 4 when we finally potty trained him too. This is what we did. I took 2 weeks off from work thinking it would take that long to potty train my son. You are going to think I am crazy, but this is my 4th child and I was sick of changing diapers. I hid the diapers and pull ups. I told my son that we were out of diapers and pull ups and he was going to have to wear big boy underwear. He had 8 accidents the first day, 5 accidents the second day, and 0 accidents the third day. I didn't make a big deal out of it when he had an accident, I just changed him and put on more underwear. At the end of the first day I had to wash all of his underwear to have them for the next day. He still wears a pull up at night and naptime. If I don't keep them hidden he will change out of the underwear and put on a pull up, so they are hidden all the time. If he knows enough to change into a pull up himself he knows enough to go to the bathroom in the potty. It took 3 days and he was trained!

I am afraid you are going to have to let him pee his pants. It sounds like he knows what he is doing and it is a bit of a control isue. Does headstart know he is wearing pull ups because i thought you had to be fully potty trainde to attend. Good luck.

I just potty trained two 2 1/2 years old.At the same time. One thing I find that workes with me is keeping track.I write down the time I took them every morning and if the went or not.The one that could not go I took back in twenty minutes.I stayed on talk to them even let them look at book in the bath room.I start with taking kids every hour the frist day. till I see how often theydo need to go.The next day I change it to hour and half. But with a four year old I think I would go no longer then every two hours. Good luck I am a Mom of three grown boys and a Grand Mother of 6 plus I Baby sit in my home for 3.

set a potty timer for ever hour. as soon as that goes off you go sit on the potty we got my daughter potty trained really fast by doing this. and of course make a huge deal when he goes. as for the pull ups get rid of them it only confuses him. if you are sure hes ready(not wetting for a long time, telling you when he needs to be changed) then try it if hes not showing signs dont bother hes not ready yet good luck!

You have to constantly bring him and constantly remind him. Every half hour- bring him over there and tell him it's time. He is old enough to know what he's doing and he's certainly old enough to get potty trained. Keep telling him that he's too smart to go potty in his pants and remind him how yucky it is when you soil yourself..he knows it doesn't feel good. I kept telling my daughter "you don't want to go potty in your pants..that's yucky!" She finally started saying it herself...and better yet, believed it! People also say don't reward with food...I say that's for the birds! Give him an m&m for potty and 2 or 3 for poop. Worked like a charm with my daughter and she no longer asks for them. Don't get discouraged- it can take 6 weeks to 3 months to train- but it should take no more time than that and you might be pleasantly surprised if he does it sooner. But it has to be you being adament...keep bringing him, keep reminding him..he'll get it.

My son was the same way. One day when we were at walmart he wanted a toy dinosaur and we told him he could play with it as soon as he went to the potty like a big boy for one week. We also put him in big boy underwear. We put the dinosaur in the livingroom so he could see it everyday.everytime he went to the bathroom we reminded him that he was getting closer to getting his toy. He was fully potty trained within a week and didn't even play with dinosaur lol.i hope this helps. Good luck

I feel for you D.! Boys are not easy to train. I never used pullups for daytime training. I went straight to underwear when I thought they were ready, and never looked back. It's very important to put potty trainers on a schedule. If he goes to Head Start, he may be on somewhat of one already. Make sure you and the caregivers are on the same page, and that you do the training the same way consistently. Take a weekend when he's not going to childcare and put him in underwear. Every hour and a half tell him in a pleasant voice "It's time to go potty now." After a couple days, his body will begin to regulate itself to the times you have taken him, and he should begin to go at some of those times. He will have accidents, but I have found more success when you don't switch back and forth between underwear and pullups. After a week or so of taking him every hour and a half, start taking him at major points in the day (say, for example, after you wake up, after breakfast, after lunch, before nap, after nap, after snack, etc. ) He should start telling you when he has to go. I taught preschool for many years, and those teachers should be open to helping out. Good luck. Email me if you'd like any more info.

I think your boy know exactly what he is doing and is potty trained, just doesn't want to go use it. I would switch from rewarding him for going to negative consiquence if he messes in his pants. For instance, if you pees in his pants, take away the toy he is playing with until he pees/poops on the potty like a big boy. Keep enphasizing the big boy part. "Daddy doesn't peepee or poopoo in his pants, don't you want to be a big boy like daddy?"

My son was the same way. I eventually started "cleaning" him with spraying him in cold water shower (less than a minute) every time he messed in his pants.-this only took 2 times. You know what, he never messed in his pants again.

Hey D., this is what we're doing with our toddler that we're trying to potty train. We stopped using the pull ups because she thought they were diapers. What we're doing and you may want to consider, we use the cotton pants by Gerber. She wears them all day and she only wears a pull up at naptime and nighttime. I would let go of the pull ups because it seems that your son is dependant on them and he seems to be refusing to potty train. He can't go naked all of his life and schools won't take kids if they're not potty trained. Try the cotton pants. Stick with them even when he messes in them. I know you probably don't want to clean the mess but these have helped my daughter tremendously. For the most part she is mostly peepee trained. #2 comes later. It takes time as well. He may be more ready to potty train than both of you realize. He'll get the hang of it soon, using the pants of course. Good luck and I hope this helps. J. A.

I had some trouble with my daughter too. It wasn't until I got too busy to deal with it anymore and just stopped talking about it that she finally started going on the toilet on her own. I know it sounds weird, but it may work to just put underwear on him and not talk about it. Silently clean up if he has an accident and really go overboard if he chooses the potty. Also, I would try this when you have a couple days with him at home in a row... like a weekend or maybe even keep him out of school for a week so there is some consistency.

Hi D.,

I went through the same thing with my son. The only way he would go to the potty was if he ran around naked. So, I let him. After a while I decided I'd try reintroducing the big boy underpants. The first day or two he had tons of accidents. I just reminded him calmly that "big boys go pee-pee in the potty" eventually he remembered and would go pee-pee in the potty. Then I decided to try putting pants on him (elastic waistband sweatpants, we were potty training this winter and still working on it when we go out, he doesn't like the big potties). The first day he wet himself because the sweatpants absorbed it. But I think he got tired of getting wet and having to change and decided that it was better to go pee-pee in the potty than wet himself. So, now he lets me know he has to go pee-pee, will run to the bathroom take his pants and underpants off and go pee-pee. Pooping usually takes 4-5 attempts because he doesn't want to sit still long enough but as long as I stay patient he will poop in the potty too. He still wears pull-ups for naps and bedtime (that all comes when the child's body is mature enough). It's all trial and error. I'm sure some moms would say I was crazy but ya know whatever works for your child do it. Hang in there. It took months for my little man to get potty-trained. I know how frustrating it can be just go with your gut, you know your child the best. Take care. Katie

Potty training is sometimes a very difficult tasks for parents because it is probably one of the first things that the child has control over. It seems that you have tried some options and a rewards system is a positive reinforcement for potty training, but you might need to take the next step and have your child responsible for any accidents they may have. Put your child in "big boy" undies (make a big deal about them and even let him pick them out.) Let him know that you have seen him use the bathroom and know that he knows how to do it and from now on if he has an accident, it's OK, but he needs to be responsible for cleaning himself up.....(changing his cloths, putting them in the laundry, wiping up any mess).

Continue with celebrating his successes....cheering when he has gone, reminding him to go and showing support when he tries, (the Cheerios in the toilet always helps to motivate boys as they try and hit the cereal.)

Good luck and on the bright side.....he will get it eventually.

Hi D.,

I would cut out the Pull Ups entirely. If he thinks he can go in them, then he will. Use ONLY big boy underwear and he'll soon realize he can't go in them anymore. It's a lot of mess at first, but it's the only way we got my son potty trained right at 3. :)

I recommend two things. First don't rush it. He will do it when he is ready. Second I recommend cheerios. One night I came home and asked my son if he had to go potty and he said no then I asked if he wanted to pee on some cheerios. He said yes. He thought that was the coolest thing ever. And from that moment on he was potty trained. I even took cheerios to his daycare. They still laugh at me for it 4 years later. My second son I tried everything and he had no interest in it so I stopped trying. Then about a month later went out and had him pick out a potty chair. He loved it cause no one else was allowed to use it. And just about from that night on he was potty trained. Hope it helps.
G.

Hey D.

You are not alone! I am a mother of four. My son turned 4in Oct and is still not fully potty trained. He wears pull ups at night. I was told that he will eventually be completly potty trained at his own time.

He will be starting head start in the Spring. I am hoping by then he will be fully potty trained. My other children were all different some trained by 2 and others by three. Just give him some time he will get there!

Good luck

J.

Hi D.!
First off, you're not alone!!! My daughter turned 4 in December and is just now potty trained! I was starting to think it would never happen, and we tried EVERYTHING! Right before she turned 4 I told her that I was not going to buy pull-ups anymore because she was a big girl and did not need them when awake. I let her choose whether she was going to wear pull-ups or training undies but let her know that when the pull-ups were gone, they were gone. She chose pull-ups for a couple of days then one morning chose her undies and hasn't looked back since. She still has accidents a couple times a week, but that's to be expected.
Your son may be a little confused by the switching from naked, "big boy" undies, then pull-ups. Maybe try sticking to just the undies at home for a few days. It will be messy. Just be patient.
It will happen. Hang in there! :-)
M.

Hi D.,
I am also trying to potty train my daughter. Boys are different than girls, but my little one wants to go naked too! I bought her a stool and ring to go on the potty. I also stopped asking her if she needed to go b/c she always said no. I now just make her go every 20 minutes or so. We are not quite there yet, but we are making progress!

Also, if you are looking for a stay at home job, check out my website at www.shaklee.net/simplynature. I run it completely online & make a great profit!

The book Toilet Training in Less Than a Day worked like a charm on my 27 month old son (now 41 months). You can find it on amazon.

My second son is potty training this week and he is doing really well at it, thankfully! He turned 3 in December and hasn't really shown any interest in using the potty, but we are definitely ready. I started trying to do it last weekend and it was a disaster. He has an older brother and he just wanted to play with him and was not into it at all. His daycare teacher asked me to send him on Monday in underwear and she would try it too...she has a lot more experience with it than we do! He has done unbelievably well! The first day she made him sit on the potty every hour to at least try and she would also watch him for signs that he needed to go and he didn't have any accidents. All it took was that one day to really get him motivated and to see that he could do it. By Wednesday, he was already telling us when he needed to go. He no longer wants to wear pull ups or diapers and gets mad when I put one on him at night. I still don't trust him to not wet the bed although he's been waking up dry every morning. The big difference between my two sons was that my oldest never used the little potty we bought him. He only wanted to use the big potty. We realized my second son didn't want to use the big potty. I think he would get bored sitting in the bathroom trying to go. I got out the little potty and he was thrilled to have it. He uses the regular potty at daycare, but likes having his own potty at home. You just have to figure out what works for your son and don't try to push too hard. They definitely need to go at their own pace. Good luck!

I know first hand how frustrating this is and it never helps to hear what another child is doing (or not) but it will happen...

My daughter just didn't want to give up the "convenience" of diapers (and me doing it for her) but a month after she turned 4 another child teased her at the playground "I see her diaper" and it was only a day or two after that she gave them up. Also, the incentive of a gummi tarantula if she'd poop in the potty seemed to work well too.

It will happen and then you'll move on to the next challenge... don't forget when you're a mom, it's always something!

My son was 4 when he became totally potty trained. He is 16 now and turns out he is highly functional autistic, so I am wondering if that delayed him somehow.

But anyway, one day when I complained to a daycare worker that he would never by potty trained, she said 'that's why they have roommates in college, to change their diapers.'

So, it seems like forever but remember this too shall pass.

Hello. I have a son, currently 20 years old, but your story reminds me of potting training my son. Pullups never worked for us either. I would suggest putting underpants on him, then take him to the bathroom on some sort of schedule.....as soon as he wakes up, then every hour or everytime you go, afterward, then go get him and sit him on the potty. This works with boys because they get so involved in what they are doing, playing or whatever, that they don't stop to go potty until it is too late. As a result, you have to regulate the process for him at first. He just needs to get used to wearing the underpants and the routine of pulling them down and then going to the potty.

I hope this helps. Be patient, he will get it. Good luck.