Help! 3 Month Old No Longer Sleeping Well

You can read some tips from sleep expert Dr. Marc Weissbluth at http://billiediscoverytoys.blogspot.com/2008/09/sleep-beg...

No real advice here, just want to tell you that mine is 6.5 months old and STILL goes through this. After a few hours in the crib, he usually ends up with me. He hasn't gotten up to nurse in about a month, but is unconsolable unless he is physically touching me. I am extremely sleep deprived as well, but slowly he is sleeping at least more soundly next to me, so the last few nights I have caught a solid 4-5 hours. Last week I was at the point I thought I would never get too- the lets let him cry it out. I tried to soothe him without picking him up, but after crying on/off for over 20 minutes, his nose got stuffy and that was the end of that. Good luck, there are lots of us out there going through the same stuff, you are not alone!

it's probably a growth spurt which is common around 3 months. i have a six month old who is usually a great sleeper, except when he's not! i have to keep reminding myself that once in a while he is going to leave us all sleepless, whether because of a growth spurt or teething or some other unknown reason, which doesn't mean that he has become a poor sleeper. we all stay up nights every now and then with our wheels spinning, right?!

He's going through a growth spurt right now and absolutely needs to nurse! He is also way too young to even think about letting him cry. Around 6 months you can look into 'sleep training' but it's way too early now - even the sleep training experts would say that.

There is something called a 'dream feed' I know a lot of women use. Around 10:30 they nurse without waking the baby too much. Baby eats almost while asleep. That might be what he needs to get him through the 1:30am wake up hump.

I would suggest you start reading The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. She explains all about sleep patters and how to get a nursing (and bottle-fed, too) baby to sleep better and it was a miracle cure in our home. But, again, you shouldn't be putting those ideas to work for a few more months.

Babies go through many stages and change sleep habits often. My son is 16 months old and still wakes up 5 times each night. I think you were lucky to get sleep up to this point. The rest depends on what you want to do for your son, either let him cry until he learns to go to sleep or do whatever it takes to soothe him. This age is a very imporatant time to do your sleep training homework and decide what is right for your family. At 4 months they are able to actually learn how to get to sleep alone and if you don't give him that chace you may end up with a 16 month old who can't get to sleep on his own, like mine. I still can't bring myself to let him cry. He knows that I will come when he cries so he cries in order to have me near him. I guess I spoiled him but I am willing to make sacrifices for him so we work it out. My son will learn to sleep better eventually. You still have hope for your little guy.

Hi Deborah
At 3 months most babies are getting ready to go through their 1st growth spurt and they do get more hungry at that time. He needs another bottle to help him off to sleep again. If you are not giving him the bottle, then that is why he keeps waking up so many times.
It will last a few weeks to about a month and then he should fall back into a pattern. Sometimes babies will keep that up for 2 months. But hang in there and he will rest better soon.
I wouldn't let him cry at his age. He is too young to "get spoiled". Babies at his age cry for a reason...usually for food.
Best of luck to you and I hope this helped you!
Take care,
P.
P.S. Don't worry about the "Sleep training" business at this stage. My daughter is 15 months old and she goes right off every night with or without music and she sleeps from 8 pm until 8 am. And I followed the information I gave you here. Don't think that if you didn't establish a sleep pattern by now, you will pull your hair out later....NOT TRUE. All babies go through many stages during their 1st year. You will know when it is something other than a hunger issue. No one knows their baby better than Mama! And your baby is too young to be aware of such things. He cannot use you to sooth himself except that he needs you to provide him with his food so he can get back off to sleep!
Hang in there...all will be fine!

Hi there, my child went through this, they go to this stage every so often, it could be from growth spurt or whatever, I got scared and concerned too but pls realize they go through stages like this, just keep his routine going and he'll eventually get back into his groove of sleeping well again. He's nursing probably for comfort, I know it's hard but they this is a stage he's going through, hang in there, it will get better.

First, stop allowing him to use you as his means to fall asleep. Because in a yr he will still need you and you will be sick of it. Stop that trend now you'll thank me for it. Give him a binky (because that is what he's using you for) or something else, but I would no longer allow him to fall asleep while he's nursing. The bedtime habits you create now are the ones he will rely on later. Second, it's a growth spurt. At this age they go through one about every 3 months. Once it's over hopefully he will go back to the good sleeper he was. I would continue to sleep train him. Set up a bedtime routine you can stick to every night. Bath, read him a book. And let him nurse, but don't let him fall asleep. If he starts to dowse, stop nursing wake him up and then start over. He needs to learn that nurse time is nurse time and not sleep time. Then once he's done, put him to bed drowsy but awake. This will help teach him to fall asleep on his own. I always play soft music for my kids while they sleep. This helps to set the mood and they know it's time for sleep. My kids go to bed better then any you've ever seen. I tell them it's time to go, we do kisses, get pj's on, read our book, I turn on the music, turn out the lights (this is when my daughter gets her milk and we rock in the dark about 5 mins) and leave the room. If they wake during the night, all I have to do is turn the music back on and their right back out (my daughter usually needs her binky replaced). If it's way past their normal bed time, their begging to go to bed. And on normal nights, they go to bed about 7:30 and their usually asleep before 8. I started sleep training my kids when they were about 3 mos and their the best sleepers. Now at 4 1/2 yrs and 20 mos they sleep through the night from 7:30 to about 6:30 or 7.

Hi Deborah! My son did the exact same thing. A great piece of advice I received was that every three months or so, babies experience rapid development in many ways. Your son is probably going through a growth spurt, plus some major nervous system changes and development! The sleep deprevation is really, really difficult. After fighting with trying to get my son to sleep in his crib, my husband and I decided that as working parents, our own sleep was too necessary and precious to give up - and so we are now a full-on cosleeping family. I don't know if you are interested in this option at all, but I suggest trying it out. Three-month olds are still very small babies that need to eat through the night, and be comforted. It is most definitely is a phase that seems super tough and frustrating right now, but it will calm down again soon. I don't know if you're a fan of Dr. Sears or not, but I found his writings on infact sleep very helpful and reassuring!

All the best!
K.

At 3 months old, I do not reccomend letting him cry for more than a minute or two. I really think that will stress both of you out even more and you know its true, eventually you will give in and breastfeed him. He could be going through a growth spurt, or going through some other mystical baby thing. This is quit common and happens a lot. I do not agree with the previous post. When he wakes up, go nurse him and help him go back to sleep. Do you have a mobile or a "lovie" for him yet? He should be in his own room, that will help him sleep through the night as well. Use those in conjuction with the nursing. He is not ready to self soothe. When he knows that he has a secure and loving relationship with you, he can pass through this phase more easily and become confident enough to put himself back to sleep. I had the same dilema and went and nursed him and helped him go back to sleep. He has been sleeping 10-12 hours since 4 1/2 months. Sometimes, especially if he is sick this does get interrupted. But hey, that is what mom's are for.

Trust me I feel your pain I have just come out on the other side of this. My Daughter did the same thing starting around 3 months. After a few months we tried to use ferber sleep traning which is very emotionaly diffacult on parents but can work great, it was a life saver for my son. It was not the answer for my daughter thought. After lots of research on what to do and lots of sleepless nights. I do not think my daughter was getting enough to eat durning the day. I was ex. bf. we first started giving her formula for her last feeding at about 6 months which did not really help even though she would drink 8 oz right before bed. But I tried to nurse her more durning the day and would even nurse her then offer her a bottle which she would take, and drink another 4 oz of,so I figured I was not producing enough milk. Slowly I started increasing bottles durning the day. She is now 10 months and is sleeping from 8 until 6 or 6:30 without a peep out of her. Yesterday I dropped the last nursing session. I am not telling you that this is what you should do, but this is what worked for us. It it soooo hard to be sleep deprived I really feel for you. Good Luck and wishing you peaceful sleep.

We went through this and it was tough. We thought we were in "the clear" b/c our son basically slept through the night starting at 6 wks. Then at around 4 months he started waking up every two hours and it was draining on both my husband and myself, although I was nursing at the time.

I spoke with our pediatrician about this and he let us know that it is completely normal. Kids go through cycles where they need more or less sleep. He suggested a couple of things that helped us-
- first, NO NIGHT NURSING once they have doubled the birth weight. Metabolicaly, they don't need to eat at night! They are looking for comfort, not food. Make sure that his belly is full before going down. Try not to let him fall asleep while nursing. Keep him awake until you are completely empty.
- NO NAPS W/IN TWO HOURS OF "BED TIME" He suggested that we eliminate the late afternoon nap and find something quiet to do with him instead or take a walk with him. If the baby isn't tired when you put him down, then it's just another nap!
- Use a SOOTHER in the crib. We used the Fisher Price Rainforest one and my son loved it. If he woke-up, one of us would go in, give him a binky, rub his back and turn on the "t.v". This usually lulled him into sleep.

This too shall pass... every time they get a cold their sleep pattern is disrupted, when you travel, when they are growing, always changing. Just when you think you have it pinned-down they change!

Good luck!

Hi K., The change in sleep habit may be due to teething. He may be waking up due to pain. This will pass. I know you are doing your best but baby will go in and out of stages. Hang in there. Once you are sure of the reason you can help him accordingly. I know you are tired but all mommies are and you will survive. Grandma Mary

He could me going through a growth spurt and just needs those extra feedings. At 3 months old, it's amazing that he was sleeping from 8:30-4:30, so count your lucky stars that you had it that good for awhile! They will go through these times when they wake sporadically throughout the night due to hunger, teething, etc. My son still does it at 22 months old. Does your son use a binky? My son is a binky fan and that has always seemed to help him sleep well for the most part.
Good luck!
Lynsey

Definitely talk to your doctor, they may have good advice...but also when this sort of thing happened to my daughter, turned out she has an ear infection. She only cried at night b/c it hurts more when they are lying down. Wouldn't hurt to get it checked. Good Luck....I feel your pain, I've got a six week old and a 2yr. old!!
E.

Thank goodness I'm not the only one! At two weeks old, my son started sleeping from around 11pm to 9am with his first night feeding anywhere from 4 to 6 1/2 hours after he went to sleep. Then he would wake up every two to three hours or so after that. It was great. I was only waking up 3 times most nights.
Once he hit 2 1/2 months, he started waking up every two hours. Everyone said it was a growth spurt, but he's four months now and I'm still waking up like five or six times at night. After 4am, he wakes up every hour or so many days. My lactation consultant told me I should feed him when he wakes up, but my pediatrician told me I shouldn't feed him. I don't know who's right, but I choose to feed him since it puts him right back to sleep. Also, he usually ends up staying in bed with me after 4am since he sleeps better when he's next to me. I may not get comfortable sleep after 4am, but at least I'm getting some kind of sleep and I don't constantly have to get out of bed. Plus, at this point, I'm so exhausted that I usually fall asleep while he's nursing and I'm way too tired to keep putting him back in his bed. You are not alone. I wish I had some advice for you. Hopefully, both of our sons will start sleeping better tonight!Good luck!