Help! My 3 YO Niece Never Sleeps!!!

Melatonin can help (get at GNC). One tablet melted in mouth can help calm her..... also do lavender baths befroe bedtime, read stories, develop a bedtime routine. Maybe put a baby gate at her door?? Talk to the ped before trying any supplements.

This appears to be a habit and like any bad habit it needs to be broken. However, you aren't the one to do that, her MOTHER is the one who should be breaking this bad habit. I don't care if she is "dead" to the world, she is the responsible party here. When the 3 year old wakes up in the middle of the night, send her to her mom. If mom doesn't wake up, you go wake her up and tell her that her daugher needs her. You are the aunt not the mom. that is the first habit that needs to be broken.

At her age it's going to take a while to get her into a good sleep routine. I would say that unless this is a medical problem just getting her into a good bedtime routine will be key. She needs to be going to bed at the same time every night including weekends. Bath, brush teeth, story, prayers and lights out. Then, let her know ( as I'm sure you already do) that if she gets out of bed during the night, she will be put right back in her bed. Then just follow through. If she gets up, do not talk to her or do anything ( no drinks of water, etc.) except to put her right back in her bed. After several nights, she should learn to stay in bed. It just takes a lot of persistance. We had this problem with my daughter, but she was much younger. I hope that helps! Oh we also put a clock in her room and told her that she could not get out of bed until 7:00. She couldn't really tell time yet but she was able to tell when it was 7.

Wow, we know she is sleeping, we just don't know when. Is she irritable? If not, she is getting enough sleep. So now the problem is safety.
I would consider having activities that she can do in her bed when she wakes up. Colorforms, crayons and paper, a snack, a flash light, a tape with ear phones she can listen to. There have to be rewards for staying in the room, consequences for leaving the room without an adult's permission. Even put a potty chair in there if you think she gets up to urinate.

If she is cranky, irritable- we all know that tired cry-then you need to seriously consider pediatric benadryl. But first I would have her evaluated by her pediatrician and discuss with him alternatives. With adults, a disturbed sleep pattern can be reestablished with something like benadryl over 3 or 4 days and then withdrawn.

Did this just start when she moved in with you? A conversation about the fears that may interrupt her sleep may also be warranted.
Good luck,
K.

Sleep is essential for overall health and development. A 3 year old needs 12-14 hours a day. I would visit the pediatrician to see if there is some physical condition (i.e., ear problems) that are causing her to stay awake.

I've had that problem occasionally and tried to get all the info I can. I certainly do not advise or accept any reason to give a child a medication unless it is prescribed by a physician for a medical issue, even over-the-counter ones. I doubt your niece has a medical condition that warrants medications. Is she sleepwalking or totally awake? Does she remember getting up? If this isn't the case, I would try other methods before you take her to the doctor. I've read several articles and books that suggest that the more exhausted we are the more difficult it becomes to sleep. Babies and children do get to a point where they are too tired to sleep. We mistakenly get the impression that if the toddler or preschooler (even older child)isn't fussing or doesn't seem cranky at 10 PM at night when they go to bed and get up at 6 AM, that they don't need more sleep. They do...they are just more mature emotionally and not quite as prone to the fussiness that a baby is. One of the books suggested putting your child (niece) to bed an hour or two earlier than usual for a few days. She will probably not wake any more often or earlier than she has been. But do this for several days and make sure she does get her naps, if it seems like she needs one. If she gets out of bed take her back immediately without saying anything to her. Just take her to bed, cover her up and leave. A friend of mine went through this when her two year old moved to a toddler bed. It took 3 nights to get him to stay in bed and get back to sleep. She basically had to stand at his door and the minute it opened take him back to bed. I believe the first night it took quite a few times before he stayed, the second even more, but the third fewer. The fourth night he didn't get up. He had stopped getting the reinforcement of interaction when he got up. So staying up wasn't as enticing. While my kids haven't done the popping out of bed thing much, they do start sleeping less and less the later they go to bed or if they've not had a nap. Try this and I bet that eventually, her routine, if she had one, will come back and you can go back to the regular bedtime. My husband still doesn't really understand this...he says it seems so backward, but even he admits this did work for our kids. I highly recommend looking up the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". Also...I would not let your sister sleep through it all... Go get her up the minute you hear your niece and then lock your door. While you can help with your family, they are not your children...she is the mother...she should be one! Good luck.

I agree with taking her to the pediatrician.

You might also try black out curtains to keep her asleep when she does finally fall asleep.

Someone may try staying with her a few days 24-7 to be with her to figure our her patterns to see where the problem might lie.

Cut out all sugar and processes foods. It might be an allergy to a food she is eating that is putting her into overdrive.

I remember my daughter woke up frequently at the age of 3. You must teach her to stay in her bed and not bother the household. She may fall back asleep, if she does not get up and walk around. My daughter would start getting up when we were still up. I had to sit outside her door for a few days and direct her back to bed immediately. She got to where she would crack the door and cry when she saw me. Then, she did not get up at all. We used rewards if she stayed in her bed all night. We took away TV if she got up. She went several days with zero TV before it started to work. I would not let her get out of her bed and play in her room. I placed books that she could look at while in bed, if she must do something. It took a bit of work, but she did stay in her bed and sleep. I think at that age they wake to discover a dark quiet house and wonder, "Hey I need to check this out." I hope her mother will be reading these responses. You are a dear aunt.

Maybe start by calling your pediatrician for a referral to a doctor who specializes in sleep disorders in children. She is definitely old enough to be able to sleep through the night. It is very normal to briefly wake during our active sleep cycles but she is definitely coming out of it more than the average person. It could possibly be behavioral. My step brother's 3 YO has to be rocked to sleep every night and wakes every night between 2:00 and 3:00 and climbs into bed with them. For her, I think it was bad habits created over time. Lastly, as others have said, cut out as much sugar as you can (cut out some carbohydrates as well). The diets of most kids her age are made up of mostly carbs; it will be difficult. Nothing but water and milk either. No juice. Lastly, start a reward program. Maybe a sticker board where she works to earn a prize. Every night she says in bed until she sees the sunlight outside, she earns a sticker. They also make these nightlights that have a glowing moon on them. It has a timer on it so you can set it where it will show a sun when they are allowed to come out of their room. I think they are $20 online. I would still be concerned about the amount of sleep she is getting. Although, does she fall right back to sleep when she comes into bed with you, or is she up for an hour? If she falls asleep quickly, could she be having nightmares? Do you see any difference in her sleep pattern when she has a VERY active day? ...like after going to a inflatable jumpy place. Talk to the doctor about Melatonin drops as well. Oh, and her mom really needs to be dealing with this (as if you don't already know this). I would definitely talk to your sister and tell her this is really impacting your life. Good luck, not getting sleep is rough!

Love all the suggestions to you here. All very valid. I'm sure you'll get more. Another thing to have her doctor check is for Restless Leg Syndrom (which is passed down)or due to a lack of iron - RLS. If she is super fidgety etc... she could just not be able to relax. Here is a website to check out. Just a thought: http://www.rls.org/

See if she will sleep better with you in the room, also play some soft music. Both will let her know that there is someone else in the room. Good luck

What is her day like? She needs to really have an active day. Lots of running, climbing, peddling, swimming. Even once she gets home from daycare. What time do you all put her to bed? What is her bath time routine? Do you keep your home pretty quiet at her bedtime? Maybe a white noise machine and blackout curtains?

If you feel she gets enough of this, I agree taking her to the Dr. and just have her checked out. Some kids are light sleepers and some kids just do not need as much sleep. A 3 year old can understand that she needs to stay in bed till a grown up wakes up. She can play quietly in her bed. Instruct her to be quiet so everyone can sleep till THEY wake up.

Melatonin. It is natural and won't hurt her. Also, mom needs to get up and take responsability for her daughter. If you have to, you go wake her mom up. She needs to sleep or the child will get defiant and have behavior issues, if she doensn't already. Good luck!

you may need to get her into the doctor my neice was the same way and they think she is Autistic and Bipolar and ADHD with mood disorder when we first got her she would scream for 40 minutes and sleep for 20 she is now on Risperdal, melatonin and claritin and it helps her to sleep. I am not saying that these are your nieces problems my sister is a methhead and did lots of bad things during pregnancy.

My nieces see Dr Jerry Hall at Scott and White Childrens Hospital in Temple he rocks

I doubt that your niece needs any medication to resolve this. Talk to your sister and have her figure this out. Her day time routine, what she eats and when she naps could all be part of this. Also bed time routines are very important for children.

If possible use a gate to keep her in her room and keep her safe. If she climbs over the gate, maybe used 2 one on top of the other or do what my parents did, install a screen door on the bedroom door. It kept me safe but you could still hear and see me. I was an escape artist!

Good luck!

Without knowing more information, it is hard to give you a good response. There is a lot of good advice provided. A pediatrician should be able to offer help. I have a 3 year old who also does not like to sleep, and as a result, I have a few things that have not been suggested yet. Believe it or not, getting naps is what helps. They can wind themselves up and get so wired that they never fall asleep. I know it sounds crazy, but too little sleep can keep them awake. It could also be anxiety. If boundaries are not set, it is difficult for them to settle down. The world is big and scary at the age of 3. There is a whole new world and not much understanding! A consistent routine needs to be set up. Then consistent consequences need to be followed to help her understand that it is not okay to wander around the house at night. It is not easy and it is not going to happen overnight! My daughter, who had a consistent bedtime routine and sleep schedule went for probably 3 months trying to get out of bed. It was rough and what worked for my daughter might not work for you, but my guess is that it is just a stage. (Again, I say this without knowing more specific information, and I would still check with a pediatrician.) Oh, and not that this is the answer for you, but we put childproofing doorknob handles on our room and all the rooms where my daughter could get into trouble. After a few weeks of realizing she could not wake anyone up and she could not get to anything fun, she stayed in bed. We had baby monitors outside our room, so even though she couldn't reach us, we could still hear her. She sleeps like a champ today! Good luck!

is she getting lots of soda and sugar? cut that out of her diet. also tell her she has to stay in bed and keep putting her back in bed. we got spanked if we were doing these things. not only is it bad for you its bad for her health too. i actually would go and wake there mother and tell her every single time this happened. its really her responsability.

Hi L R
Hopefully she has been tested- sounds like she really needs that- her pedi could give her something to calm her down. but in the mean time- put gates up where she cannot get out of her room and use monitors that will alert "mom" when she is up. Be sure there are no objects in the room that will give her harm and see how that works.
good luck and blessings