Help! Need Some Advice.

Updated on March 08, 2009
A.H. asks from Indianola, IA
13 answers

I have 2 yr old twins and their dad has never met them. He quit his job and hasent been paying child support. Im hearing that if I dont have legal documentation that I claim the kids, then he is wide open to them at tax time. I am calling legal aide to see what help I can get..anyone else been in my shoes..I havent talked to there dad in over a yr.
Thanks.
Ang

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A.S.

answers from Rapid City on

If he don't have their SSN he can't...you have to provide their SSN when filing taxes.

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L.N.

answers from Benton Harbor on

No, that's not true. I've been there; my son's bio. father claimed him on his taxes one year and falsely took EIC. There was no way I was going to NOT claim him since he rightfully lived with us. The duplicate SS numbers will flag the IRS and they will check it out. All you have to do is tell them (if they ask) that they live with you and he has never even seen them. The burden of proof will lie with him! Do your taxes as usual and you'll be fine.
~L.

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D.L.

answers from Appleton on

Do you have a child support order? To protect yourself and the kids, you should go through the courts to obtain a support order, otherwise when he does go back to work you will not be able to collect back child support. Also, an order will clear up your tax question and any visitation, decision making rights, etc. It protects you in case he all of a sudden becomes "responsible". It does happen. You can probably do all this "Pro Se", without attorneys fees.
Good luck and God Bless.
D'

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J.O.

answers from Boise on

You are right that he can claim them, BUT Lacy is right also, we ran into this with 2 of my "step"-children, so when my husband filed we asked about it and that is what our accountent told us, the worst that will happen is any refund you might get could get delayed, but he is the one who will get into trouble, so do your taxes let the IRS work it out.

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A.P.

answers from Provo on

Dear A.,

Haha- he doesn't have a leg to stand on. Unless something has changed that I don't know about (good reason to call the tax aide) unless the kids lived with him at least 6 months out of the year, you have the legal right to claim them. If he pays child support in full and on time, he has a reasonable arguement depending on the state and the judge -that much is hearsay. But if he's not doing anything at all he would be insane to try and claim them. If they were claimed by both of you, there are high chances that the IRS would do an audit and he would get in trouble. Oh yeah, and if you're the custodial parent he also has to have written permission from you to claim them (unless it's written somewhere in divorce or custody papers).
I haven't had this problem in several years, but it's always good to check and see if the tax laws have changed.

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K.L.

answers from Green Bay on

I went thru a similar problem with my divorce. Seems at tax-time, if you're divorced, the person with physical custody claims the kids as dependents. My ex tried to claim ours anyway. Being that you were not married to the man, and you have an order for child-support, that should be all the documentation that you need. If he tries to claim them, it would be tax-fraud. Check the irs.gov website and look up who can claim dependents, who qualifies as a dependent, and who can claim EIC.

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J.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

(lol) He's an idiot if he does, I wouldnt worry about it either. My brother has to go to court and have a judge decide about him claiming his daughter every other year on his tax's, and he pays almost 400 dollars a month child support. But even he knows that he doesnt just rightlfully claim her, it has to be agreed upon, maybe not even by judge, but where her mother is fighting it, He could get into a lot of trouble if he just did it anyway. It will be doccumneted that he gets to claim her every other year in the child support papers.
And the only reason he does get to claim her is because he pays child support, he pays for 1/2 the day care costs, ALL the Air fair to fly her here to spend time with him, 1/2 of all medical bills. (He pays out the butt and deserves to claim her on his tax's)

I'm sorry you have such a dead beat ex. My sons father left us when he was 8 months old, he's 12 years old now, it makes me sad when a child (or children) have to suffer there absence even if the guy is a jerk and they are better off w/o him.

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S.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Order through the courts or not, if he hasn't paid child support, and until he is up-to-date, he cannot claim them. If he does, just show the IRS that he owes you money for child support and it will be fixed. Just make sure that you claim them, whether or not he does. If you both claim the kids, the IRS will catch it, and make you both show your case; he doesn't have one.

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C.F.

answers from Omaha on

Check the new tax laws for the IRS has determined that the parents who has custodial custody of the kids (this is based on who the kids are with the majority of the time) are the ones able to claim the kids at tax time despite what the decree says. If the ex wants to claim them then you need to sign over a paper that says he has the right to claim them that year. Dont quote me on this but when i did my taxes this year this is what my accountant told me so i claimed the two kids for the first time in 6 yrs.

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L.W.

answers from Saginaw on

I am also a single mother and unfortunitly I have an ex that sounds a lot like yours. He doesn't pay child support, unless I find out his employer & turn him in to friend of court. He lives within 5 miles of us & never tries to contact the girls, yet come tax time, he always complains that I claim them both. He thinks he should get to claim one. Before we had a custody case set up, I went to friend of court to get something in writing so he couldn't. They said because I was never married to him, and my daughter lived with me full time, until an order was set up by the judge, Michigan law states the mother has full custody & he could get in serious trouble if he tried to claim them. I now have our custody set up for me having full legal & physcial custody of the girls so he has no leg to stand on.

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K.E.

answers from Casper on

He can not legally claim them or file them on his taxes!!! As long as they have lived with you for 8 out of 12 months of every year, then you are head of household, and only you can claim them! You are obviously the primary caregiver, and he has taken no responsibility. I just talked to H&R block about this, so I think my word is correct. But don't hold me to it. Check on IRS.GOV. Also, I would go to The Department of Family Services and ask them about filing for Child Support Enforcement. Even if you don't want Child Support, or he won't pay, they will file with the courts and make him sign over rights or take responsibility. Then if he signs them over he has NO RIGHTS whatsoever, and if he ever files a tax return.. YOU get it! I have a 12 year old that I went through the same thing with when she was 4. I have not seen her biological father since I was 9 weeks pregnant with her, and I filed with DFS and I get his tax return or at least a big protion of it every year because he only paid VERY little if any of child support since she was born. He has two choices, sign over rights or learn to have a relationship with her and start paying Child support. He chose to sign her over and it has worked well in my favor.

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K.B.

answers from Casper on

If for some reason he does claim them on his taxes before you get yours done then you will just have to call the IRS and gather up proof that you are the primary caregiver and then mail it to them and you will then get the money for them. That is what my friend had to do anyways when her ex tried claiming their son.

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T.N.

answers from Saginaw on

I had this problem with my two girls and their father. When we first split up i allowed him to claim one but after i was supporting them and he had nothing to do with them. He decided with his g/f at the time that he was goin to claim my oldest. I was sooo mad. The only thing that i was stopped on doin was being able to do my taxes online. I had to do it by paper cause of course my daughters number was used. But what i had to do was send in proof that she was in my care. Like i sent in my lease agreement for my apartment. I also sent in DHS papers that showed she was on my case the whole year. Any thing that u can send in to prove that they both were with u helps. I agree with the whole let the IRS figure it out cause in the long run he is the one that will get into trouble. My ex hasn't got into trouble yet that i know of about the taxes but i know in the long run it will catch up to him. Oh and like someone else said it just might take longer. The only time it took was cause i had to send all of it in the mail. Also may i suggest if u don't have a custody order u could go talk to a support worker at the DHS office. They can help set every thing up for u and in the long run its worth it. GOOD LUCK and let us know what happened

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