Help Needed

After reading these responses I must say that you have gotten some good advice, and I"M GLAD GINA H ISN'T MY MOM!!! Yeesh!

Hi K.,

I had that trouble with my daughter. We used a bed alarm. It worked wonders for her. It was $60 but well worth it. It took her a couple of months not to have any accidents at all. She has not had an accident since. I got the paper work from her pediatrcian. If you have any questions feel free to contact me. Good Luck!!!

D.

My husband told me the story of when he was little and wet the bed. His mom made him deal with the clean up every night. He was responsible for getting the sheets in the washer and started. And had to make the bed with another set before he went back to sleep. He said it took a week or so but he finally started waking up before it happened instead of after it happened... I believe he had some kind of wet sheet alarm to wake him up when it happened.

Good luck

If it were my child, I would take her to another urologist. A ten year old shouldn't still be urinating at night. From there, depending on the child/ situation, I might get a social worker involved to find out if there is another reason. Additionally, you might set up an alarm in her room to go off a couple of times a night and have her go to the bathroom when it goes off. Then wean her down to one time a night if she does well with it. Just a thought. Hope this helps.

Dr. Rapp, in her book called Is This Your Child? talks about bed wetting says some allergic children have spasms in their bladders rather their lungs, if everything you have had tested comes back normal, then see a pediatric urologist, if that comes back normal, then get tested for allergies. her website is www.drrapp.com it is a great book to have on one's shelf! But it won't hurt to get an allergy test anyways. In her book, common allergy triggers were wheat and dairy.

J. W. MPH
Wellness Educator/Lifestyle and Wellness Consultant

Hi K.,
I've had a similiar problem with my 6 year old, but I think we're finally over the problem. I make sure he uses the bathroom every night before going to bed. He also sleeps on waterproof bed liners (I got mine at CVS in the incontenience isle). Makes for an easy clean up.

First of all, if there isn't a psysical problem, then bed wetting is usually thought to be connected to a psychological issue. Does your daughter have a lot of anxiety over this, probably yes. I feel as though I used to get so mad at my 6 year old for having day time accidents so often. I finally made a huge effort to never get even a tiny bit mad, I'd just change his clothes and be done with it. I noticed that he would get so worried about making me or my husband mad and he obviously felt bad about it. It sounds strange, but I think it made him have even more accidents.

There are psychologists who specialize in bed wetting. The the first thing they do is meet only with the parents to ask about how they handle disipline issues. They suggest giving rewards for good behavior vs disipline for bad behavior.

With my son we would reward him for going a whole week without having an accident, then never getting mad if he did. Then two weeks, etc.

So try rewarding and get two of the water proof pads for her to sleep on and get rid of the overnight pants.

She might also feel like she's being punished for not being allowed to drink anything after 6:00. Just make sure you remind her to use the bathroom before she goes to bed and she should be fine.

Good luck to you both!

B.
Mother of two boys 6 and 9

Hi K.,
My ten yr old has same problem. I'm assuming the urologist has tested for bladder & urinary tract infections? A friend of mine suggested a monitor (I can't remember the name and she's gone for 2 wks) that she said worked with her daughter w/i 1 week. The child wears the monitor and it beeps loudly if she wets. The child wakes up, etc. Supposedly it worked w/i 1 week. I've got to investigate some more. D

K.,

My brother had the same problem. For him, he was such a sound sleeper he could not wake-up. If he did he was usually sleep walking and was known to tinkle in the closet by mistake! A doctor finally put him on a drug called Impramin which solved the problem. Eventually he grew out of it and stopped the medication. Good luck to you and your daughter, I hope things resolve themselves quickly for both your sakes!

She's way past over the age of not understanding what she's doing. Don't give her anything to drink before bed. Not even a sip. Forget the diaper pants, she won't learn that way. You have a rubber sheet on the bed, make her clean up the mess every day. Have her strip the bed, wire he rubber sheet with light soapy (a little non clorine bleach) water, dry it and change her own linens. Make sure she understands this is something to be ashamed of so she'll never be able to sleep overnight at a friends house or a friend at her house. Stick with this mom. If it takes a week then that's how stubborn she is. Just hang in there. If it doesn't work add taking her favorite toy away until she learns and of course keep making her do her bed. You have to practice tough love. Good luck.

My daughter is 10 years old and she has always been a bed wetter as well. Sometimes it's better than others, but I don't think she's every made it a full 2 weeks without an accident. She's had blood work done and there is no medical problem. Her doctor says it's genetic and eventually she'll grow out of it. There is a hormone that is supposed to tell the body to produce less urine when you are sleeping. In some people, like my daughter, the body doesn't produce enough of this hormone so the body does not slow the production of urine at night. There is a prescription that your child can take that will artificially produce this hormone, and your child should stop wetting her bed. But the prescription is only for short term use (maybe a month) and once she stops taking it the bed wetting will continue because it is not a cure. According to our doctor, there is no cure, only ways to cope. So until she grows out of it, we will just deal with it. We have the waterproof mattress pad and it really does work to keep the mattress dry. And we make sure that our daughter knows that she is normal and there is nothing wrong with her.

I know this is not the "cure" you are looking for, but sometimes it's nice to know that you are not alone. I know that bed wetting at this age is not common, but it does happen. And maybe you could ask the doctor about the medicine (sorry, I can't remember what it is called). Best of luck to you!

Hi K.,
When I was that age, I was such a heavy sleeper, that I would not wake up tp go to the bathroom. My mom and dad started waking me in the middle of the night and/or early in the morning. My dad would get up at 4 am to get ready for work and he would wake me up and take me to the bathroom. He also played in a band, and would get me up before he went to bed (usually on the weekends, around 2-3am). It worked pretty good (I remember waking up dry), but I don't remember how long it took before it started to work. I hope this helps.
Good Luck
K.

We use the Malem Bedwetting alarm. My son is only 8, but has been too big for goodnights for a long time. It works wonderfully. He really doesn't wet much anymore, but he wears it as a precaution. We don't cut off drinks anymore before bed either.
We also bought a mattress cover at Slumberland when we bought his new mattress & it is waterproof & allergen proof. We did have it fail once & they replaced the cover & the mattress. Best money I have spent.

Does she have any undue amount of stress in her life? My son is seven and occasionally wets the bed but when he is really anxious about something the bedwetting gets really bad.
Chiropractic care is also supposed to work really well for kids who wet multiple times a week.

T. S.

ask you DR about a medicine that they give to diabetics it's for the night only. My son took it it worked wonders. It's called ddvp or something like that. i was not one for meds but it worked no side effects from it. Look it up it's worth a try buy the plastic sheets they do help also. And never ever make your daughter ashamed for this she can not control it.

She will stop on her own. I am experiencing it with my 14 year old daughter and my sister and brother-in-law did not stop until the age of 16. I've made my daughter responsible for making sure that her bed linen is clean. I believe that they are in a deep sleep and sometimes just to lazy to get up. I don't fuss about it because they are just as embarrassed as we are about it. She will eventually grow out of it. My daughter spends that night out and doesn't have any problems. I don't want to have her on medication, and I believe that it is hereditary in my case. Good Luck.

Get a malem monitor. They have a website. My son was still wetting the bed at 11 and I finally got desperate and started to research it. We got one of these and he stopped in two weeks. These things are wonderful! It trains their brain to wake up at the first sign of dampness. No relapses, either, and he's 14.

K.,

I was a bed wetter and even had regular daytime accidents myself until I was 13. While I realize that there could be many reasons for your child's situation, I can really only speak to my own experience. I was not lazy, as some of these moms have suggested. Bed wetting or having pee- accidents in general is incredibly embarassing. Whether it is in front of your friends at school, at a sleepover, or just to have to wake up mom to tell her the news, it is still horribly embarassing. No kid wants that.

Believe me, if i could have woke myself up to go to the bathroom instead of embarassing myself, i would have. I would always have my mom pick me up before all the kids went to sleep at slumber parties. Sure, I would have liked to stay, but I preferred to avoid embarassment.

From the time I was 6 to the time I was 13, I visited 3 different urologists and switched pediatricians twice. I admit I was a sound sleeper.. so much that I would actually dream that I had to use the bathroom and would dream walking to the bathroom and sitting on the toilet... but I wouldn't actually wake up until I was wetting the bed. My mother tried eliminating baths or showers before bed, no liquids after 6pm. It seemed we tried everything. We even tried drugs-- which really just dehydrate you up and give you horrible dry mouth. It didn't change the fact that I couldn't get to the bathroom fast enough.

It wasn't until I visited my last pediatrician that we finally figured it out. I had urinary tract infections so often, that I had a build up of scar tissue... which meant it was difficult to feel the urge to use the bathroom until I really had to go... and then of course, there was such a short window of time to make it to the bathroom, that I often didn't make it on time. because I was a child, I didn't really understand the difference between what it felt like when you had to pee versus when you have a UTI. They felt similar, but with a UTI, nothing really comes out. THere in lies the problem. And, with a UTI you feel like you have to go ALL the time.

To make a long story shorter, there are 4 things that I found to be helpful, were that 1- Recognize a UTI. 2- I was not an overweight child, but I needed to get regular exercise and swimming seemed to help because it strengthens the body core without requiring the mind to focus on it. Once, I joined our local swim team, that was a step in the right direction. 3- Kegel exercises everytime I sat on the toilet to pee. 4- my last doctor told me that the problem would become significantly easier and practically remedy itself, once I got my period. And, I think that was true. I got my period at age 13.

Again, this may or may not be helpful, but I hope my story at least provides a first person perspective.

Best of luck to you!

Perhaps you want to see if she been having nitemares. sometime children can be fearful and won't get up to use the bathroom at night. i would check with her to see if she has some anxiety or something that prevents her at nite from going. talking with her will help discover how she feels about getting out of the bed in the middle of the nite by herself. i hope this help.

K. S.

start her on the medicine that they have for this. You need a prescription from her dr. My friend's dd took the meds for 2 mos and tried not taking it and was dry and has been since, so it may not be a life long time of taking it.

Hi, I have a niece and nephew who had this same problem and it turned out they had wheat and dairy allergies/sensitivities. Maybe try taking your daughter to an allergist and getting her tested, or just do a trial on your own - no wheat and/or no dairy for two weeks, you may see an instant improvement.

Sometimes if the sacrum (near the pelvis) is out, it causes a nerve signal problem with the brain, and the person will not realize she has to go to the bathroom especially at night while asleep. From what I've learned, it's common to have this type of misalignment.
Dr. Shaw of JBS Wellness in Gurnee specializes in pediatric chiropractic, and she has helped other bed wetters by making adjustments.She will be better able to explain this than I can; I just heard Dr. Shaw give a talk about this problem to other parents. Hope this helps.

I have an 11 year old son who has never been dry except for the last couple of months. We tried everything possible. We used the Pacific International alarm for over 4 years with no success. Recently I bought the Night Hawk Potty Pager online and IT WORKS!!!! It is a pager that he wears in his underwear at night. It vibrates when he pees. It is a stronger pager for older kids. It is the only thing that wakes him up while in a deep sleep. Google it online. It is so worth it!

Hi!

I'm sorry to hear about your concern; I have a son turning 9 with the same issues and the doctor is not concerned. It has not been good for his self esteem and really concerns us. Anyways he won't try one idea I've heard good things about which is an alarm system that picks up on moisture and wakes the person as they go. They are sold at medical stores and are supposed to wake up a hard sleeper and get them in the habit. I've tried waking him and taking him to the bathroom at various hours, not drinking... with no luck. When I go to his yearly physical I'll see if I get anything good as far as advice. Good luck!

Did you take her to a pediatric urologist? My son had the same problem, but besides his bladder being a little small, they also found that the nerves did not quite reach the bladder, so he didn't kinow until the last moment that he had to urinate. He also slept so deeply that he slept right through everything!

He had plastic sheets until 8th grade. What we ended up doing was to let him drink the amount he wanted. When his bladder was not full enough he did not have the sensation needed. When we restricted his liquids is when he had the most problems. Also, we made sure that he went to the bathroom right before he went to bed, woke him up when we went to bed and woke him up in the middle of the night. The whole process actually took a few months, but it worked for us. I was worried that I would have the 1st high schooler ever to high school and still wet the bed. Thank God I didn't!

Our next step would have been an alarm that wakes them when they wet the bed. We held off on that because sons share a room. Good luck!

I feel for you. I also have a 10 year old that wets the bed and wears goodnights and she always has too. And she also wets through the goodnights alot of the time and we recently also just had to buy a new mattress too. Our stories sound similiar. I know there is this alarm thing, but Lauren is such a heavy sleeper I dont think that would work. There is also another medication that can help, but we have not gone that route. She is on meds for other things now and I dont want to add another one if I dont have to. I also limit what she has to drink. I wish you luck, because I know how it is, and I am going through this same exact thing.
S. Bailey CLD
Aurora
www.tendermomentsdoula.com

K., When my kids were younger one of them wet the bed. He did it till almost jr high. What we did was to have no drinks after supper, then go to the bathroom before bed. then in the night before my husband and i would go to bed we would "walk" him to the bathroom to use it and again in the night. it became a routine for him that he then followed even after we stopped taking him. by jr high he no longer had the problem. good luck

My younger sister had the same problem and finally they figured it out - her bladder was small. So, they operated and sort of blew up a balloon inside her bladder to stretch it. That solved the problem for her!

Have you tried the bed wetting alarms? This is something my pediatrician just recommended.
Another thing she suggested was that possibly giving the kids a little more fiber in their diet because if they are constipated it is pressing against the bladder and they don't have as much control holding the pee. I'm currently trying this w/ my 6 yr. old and she has had about 5 dry nights then lapsed a little. Just a couple more thoughts in case you weren't told these.

We took my son to the MD and they prescribed Desmopresson (sp). We tried the pill form and that didn't seem to help, but now we are on the nasel spray and that is working great. Hope this helps.

Hi. I'm a foster parent and we run into these kinds of problems a lot with kids. A fellow foster parent told us of a time where they had a child that wet the bed. I believe he was around your daughter's age. They would set an alarm to wake up a time or two in the middle of the night and take him to the bathroom. Eventually, he stopped wetting the bed. It's worth a shot! Good luck!

K.,
We've had the same issue with my daughter for years. At the moment, she's dry. I wanted to add a couple of suggestions here to what's been said: Check with a dentist/ortho, since there is a link between crowding (small mouth) and bedwetting. We've done a "palette expansion" which has widened her airway to allow better breathing at night. A medication that helped was Detrol LA, although we tried many, including certain antidepressants (side effect of not sleeping so heavy) and preventative antibiotics (frequent UTIs, and she didn't notice symptoms until each was severe). Therapy has also really helped her cope. Best of luck!

A lady I work with had a smiliar issue with her son. He was older and sleeping so soundly he wouldn't wake up to use the bathroom. Their pediatrician "perscribed" a monitor to help train him to get up in the night to use the toilet. At the first sign of urination an alarm would sound. It woke hime and he knew to go use the toilet right away. The mother said it took a couple of weeks of training, but it worked. they haven't had any problems since. Maybe you should ask your pediatrician about a monitor?

my sister used the bed alarm with her daughter and said it worked beautifully.

Hi there,

We had a similar problem with our daughter as well. We tried all the traditional remedies and had her tested for any bladder problems to no avail. I was searching around the internet one day and found that bed wetting could be related to a dairy allergy. We took her off dairy and she hasn't wet the bed since. You can do a google search for bed wetting + dairy allergy and find the information.

Grace and Peace,

C.

Have the urologist prescribe a bedwetting alarm and a drug to help relax the bladder (Ditropan). We used this with two of our kids and were able to keep them dry within weeks. One tip: put a pair of underwear on her UNDER the pull ups when using the alarm to feel the wetness but not mess the sheets.

My son turned out to be allergic to milk and all dairy products.Reading labels was critical. Casein and whey--dairy derivatives, are in many foods. Removing these--not an easy task!--from his diet solved the problem. No bed wetting and he eventually out grew the whole thing.