Help Needed with Picky Eater! (17 Months Old)

Updated on September 02, 2008
S.H. asks from Spartanburg, SC
18 answers

Hi Moms--
I am at my wits' end. I have twin girls, one eats pretty well and the other eats nothing that isn't processed or a source of carbohydrates. She'll eat hot dogs, fish sticks, mozzerella sticks, chicken fingers, those Gerber fruit juice snacks, raisins (thank God, that's a fruit, right?), crackers, Cheerios, applesauce, and lots and lots of cheese. Problem is, once I put a fruit or veggie in front of her that isn't a banana, off the tray it goes, onto the floor! She won't even give it a chance. I even tried things that don't look like veggies--sweet potato fries, pickles, etc.--her veggie radar goes off the minute it comes in the vicinity of her tray! She is in daycare during the day, so I feed them the Lunchables Jr. and baby food, but I really feel like by this time we should be weaning them of baby food, am I right? I think it's the consistency she likes. Maybe she is still prone to reflux and this is a factor, but it's hard to tell at this age. Any hints on things I can feed her, especially to go meals for daycare? We still haven't tried PB yet, and I am reluctant to until two yrs. I just purchased "The Sneaky Chef" by Missy Chase Lapine, but with twin toddlers, I barely have enough time to prepare my own dinner, much less puree veggies for theirs. Help!

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L.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Had great luck with alphabet soup. The vegetables are more the consistancy of baby food. My 3 year went through a phase about the same age that he wouldn't eat any veges either. We offered them at most mealtimes and he eventually came around. My pediatrician had me give him a multivitamin because kids don't always eat what they should.

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A.E.

answers from Atlanta on

you have a great sense of humor i can tell...the only thing i can suggest is keep trying and don't give in, if she's hungry beleive me she will eat what you give her. Believe it or not 2 yr old's can manipulate.. Keep that sense of humor it helps with keeping you sane! Good Luck.

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D.H.

answers from Charleston on

Hi S.! I had to write and say that I work full time and also have a yard full of weeds and a dirty house...at least we can both laugh about it! My 29 month old daughter is also a very picky eater, so I read the responses to your request looking for some new ideas. My girl will not drink much milk, but she does like lots of yogurt (go-gurt tubes that she can eat herself). She also will eat most meats such as burger, chicken, turkey, pork, and fish (salmon only); loves basmati rice (no potatoes or pasta); and will not eat many fruits or veggies besides bananas, strawberries and avocado. When Elaina was your daughters age, she also did not eat anything except avocado and I was terribly worried about her, so I gave her Stage 2 veggie baby food until she figured out that it was veggies and stopped eating them...I say give it to them until they do start to show interest in adult veggies. You're girl and mine will not starve themselves, so we'll just keep trying and offering new things! I have discovered that when Elaina doesn't get a late snack she eats most of what is offered, except the veggies! Good luck! D. H.

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A.B.

answers from Augusta on

You have received very good advise so far, so I'm just going to say what works for me. My daughter is 21mo. and she is a somewhat picky eater. When I see that she is not eating her veggies I just start eating mine I kick up the drama level (a lot) by saying stuff like how good these beans are mmmmmmm mmmmm, Mommy loves these beans they are so good! My daughter loves it, she starts laughing and grabbing her beans and eating them. I will say that sometimes it may backfire and she wants to feed ME her veggies!! Does your daughter like fresh fruit? Mine loves all fruit, we are on a pear kick at the moment. I also hide frozen chopped spinach in our meals I just steam in the microwave and add it to whatever meal I mostly do it to spagetti and the crazy thing is, you cant taste it! Dont forget about steamed carrots and let them dip it in some ranch dressing, mine loves to dip things too. I wish you the best! Dont forget that you are the parent and you are teaching them lessons for life and it all starts whenever they are young. Toddlers are smarter than most people think, there brains are little sponges!!! Good luck and may God give you the patients that you need to get through this!

Have a Blessed Day!
A.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I have a picky eater too, and if there's one thing I've learned you will not win the food battle.Especially at 17 months. at 4 maybe but, at 17 months they are much more stubborn than you are. She's sounds like she's got a pretty good diet for a 17 month old , I see protien , dairy, and fruit, and for veggies ,they put veggies in all kinds of things now days, even in juice, Both my kids love the V8 splash fruit/veggie juices. And there are also crackers and chips that are made with veggies.
And yes I would get rid of the baby food, dont even offer it anymore.
As for lunches at day care, you can do cheese pieces, with some ham chunks ( if you haven't tried ham then do!) or elbow noodles which are fine cold, veggie crackers and some raisins and piece of cheese, also have you tried crazens ( dried cranberries? ) they ate very close in look of a raisin and have the same texture.
but again , dont push on this one it will backfire BIG TIME, all this fight does is cause extra stress.And gives her a fight she KNOWS she's winning .if you just give her what you know she will eat, then theres no power struggle. wait till she's a little older she will prob ask to try something from your plate one of these days.

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C.A.

answers from Atlanta on

Don't fret my dear. I have 5 year old fraternal girls. Kids go through stages. Both of my twins loved their fruits and veggies but I can remember certain ones they wouldn't touch and now they do and visa a versa. My mom always told me when I was concerned about their eating habits was "Well when they are hungary they will eat". Believe me if you offer her something and she smudges it, she must not be very hungary. Don't sucker in by giving her junk throughout the day though (Not saying you do) If you are really concerned with the nutrients ask the Pediatrician about supplements. Kind of like those Ensure products or maybe something you could put in her Milk or Juice through the day. Every child is different and she will be absolutely fine!

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S.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Sarah,

You've got lots of good advice, so I'll let you sift through that, but I had to let you know that your entry made me smile and I loved your "A little about me"! I realized that we are all in it together, girl! "...a yard full of weeds and a dirty house"...priceless!

Best of luck and hang in there!
Regards,
S.

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K.L.

answers from Atlanta on

I have a child who is a very picky eater also. She is now 11 but we still have food struggles! I know it takes time to puree veggies but it is well worth it. It is the only way I can sneak good stuff into our food for her. I have found it doesn't take as much time as I expected it would. I put squash and sweet potatoes in the oven at the same time, set a timer and go about my morning. After they cool,I use a magic bullet to puree them and it is pretty convenient. I use Jessica Seinfeld's book (can't think of the title) and it has lots of helpful ideas for feeding healthy foods to picky eaters. GOod luck!

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T.B.

answers from Spartanburg on

have you tried avocado? my daughter loves it cut up into cubes. it gets a bit messy but she eats it! also, she loves beans. and i've tried those broccoli bites that look like chicken nuggets from the grocery store. check out this website too for more ideas: http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com

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C.S.

answers from Columbia on

Hi S.,

First of all, I raised a picky eater, and I say, fix it now or regret it later...I sure did! I agree with the others who said don't show any reaction. Just offer it and walk away. Also, make a huge deal over the fact that her sister is eating veggies -- "Oh wow, those carrots sure are yummy, give mommy a bite...yummy, mommy loves carrots". You get the picture. Sounds crazy, but it works sometimes. Also, I took a nutrition class for children, and the instructor said you have to offer foods sometimes up to like 14 times (I know, it was some random number of times) before they will try it. Just keep offering it, and not offering alternatives. I made the mistake of assuming that my son wouldn't like certain things, and then years later I saw my friend's 1 year old eating black olives, bell pepper strips, feta cheese and basil leaves.

I work with kids with Autism and other sensory disorders, and considering she is eating a variety of textures fish sticks, applesauce and fruit snacks, I don't think it is a sensory thing at all.

Also, does she eat baby food veggies? That would tell you if it is the taste or something else she doesn't like. Finally, I would say if she doesn't mind the baby food kind, and you are really concerned about nutrition, then make a mixture of pureed veggies and add it to applesauce just for nutrition but keep offering the same veggies in regular form as well. The Veg-all brand are great finger foods for toddlers, they have pretty good-sized chunks and are soft.

My picky eater finally grew out of it, thank goodness, and now eats sushi, fish, shrimp, avacado and all sorts of "yucky" stuff. He is much older, but when I finally got to my wit's end with his picky eating, I made a huge deal any time he tried something new. Now it is a game to try something new whenever possible.

Good luck! This too shall pass.

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S.S.

answers from Atlanta on

We are starting to struggle with this as well (My DD is 17 months also). Remember it is more important what they eat over a week then at any given meal.

My DD loves cheese too, so we do mac and cheese with veggies mixed in (we buy the already diced stuff at the grocery store). She picks around some, but not all. DD loves spaghetti sauce too so I use the food processor to finely chop up squash or other veggies to add to it (it takes 2 minutes). It seems to work. Dip works well too - she loves to dip things. So quacamole or the like usually gets in. Have you tried the fruit cocktail (not in syrup) - these are pretty good too.

Luckily our daycare provides food and all the kids eat the same thing so that helps. You may want to ask what the other kids eat, it can make a difference as your daughter will probably respond to acting like the other big kids.

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S.D.

answers from Augusta on

Hi S.! I have twin boys who are 17 months old. They have been going through a picky stage too. I was giving them milk with every meal & they would drink that first & then just pick at their meal. Now I give them water & they eat 99% of all food (veggies & all)!!!!! Then I give them milk before they get down from the table. My pediatricain said they only need 16-24 oz. of milk at this age. I think your girls are old enough to start learning that it is NOT ok to throw food or cup in the floor. My boys used to swipe their hands back & forth over their tray & most of their food would end up in the floor. I started telling them no, EVERYTIME & now they are so much better...maybe 2 or 3 piece of food land in the floor at mealtimes now! YEA!!! Oh yeah, I stopped all snacks in between meals. They eat so much better at meals now. I hope this helps!

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A.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi S.,

I too have a picky eater, except he is now 4yrs. old and has been that way since he was about 18 months. One thing I have to remember (and had to remember when he was younger) is that when I try him on something new, I have to do it in small amounts and be consistent with it. What I mean by that is, when I try him with something new the first time, even when he says he doesn't like it, the next time I fix it, I give him some on his plate anyways for him to try again. I make sure that when I am trying him on something new, I also put something on his plate that he is familiar with and likes. Another thing I found to be helpful is dressing the meal up (making it look cute). Some good examples would be:
-Veggie pizza (it looks like a pizza, except it's healthy).
- Mini turkey burgers (these you might have to make from scratch using ground turkey meat, I haven't seen mini turkey burgers in the stores, but try adding maybe a small, thin slice of tomatoe, if she watches Spongebob, call it a "crabby pattie")
- Broccalli w/melted cheese topping
- Tomatoe grapes (I think that's what they are called, at least that's what I call them, those small round tomatoes)
-Veggie dips (my kids love cucumbers with ranch dressing)
-Sliced apples w/dip (maybe caramel)or apples w/cheese
-Apple Fries (Burger King has the famous apple fries, try making them at home, peal the apple and slice them in the shape of fries)
-Strawberries w/whip cream (just a little, she might eat the whip cream more than she does the strawberries)
-Veggie and meat skewers/toothe picks (these you would have to actually assist them with eating, but it might look cute on the plate and spark their interest)
-Cheese/cracker/fruit tray for snacks

For drinks, if you want to try different varieties, try making milk shakes using Ovaltine, or Nestle Quick (her doctor would probably refer Ovaltine over Nestle Quick, but I like them both). Try buying her milk and water in the little "chug" containers (those small plastic bottles), make fruit smoothies, using real fruit (i.e. strawberries and bananas).

Trust me, I know how you feel, my son is the exact same way and I am constatnly trying to come up with fun, fast and creative ways I can fix up his meal. Also, have you tried the Gerber Toddler Trays (I can't think of the exact name of them)? These trays have little meals already prepared, you just warm them in the microwave, let them cool and their ready to be served. They have a different variety, mac-n-cheese, mashed potatoes w/meat and gravey, etc. I hope this helps and good luck!

Oh yeah, a little about me, I am married with four children, (all under the age of 8)two girls and two boys. I'm in school full-time, so that, plus the little ones, keep me pretty busy.

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D.H.

answers from Atlanta on

It depends on how you want to handle it. You can train a 17 month old to eat what you want her to eat. You can get the book for toddlers at www.loveandlogic.com and it will tell you how to handle it. Pretty much what you do, is when she throws the food off the tray, just pick her up and say nicely, "uh oh, all done." And leave it at that. She is down and away from the table. She'll get her snack when that time comes, but not beforehand. Just continue (no matter how much she fusses) and stay firm and very nice and empathetic.

Another thing..I have a picky 2.5yo and she has a problem with texture, so that could be yours? But I've found that my picky eater eats best off of my plate.

Now, when my kids were still eating 'baby food', I did puree it ahead of time. I would, on the weekend while hubby is there during the day, cook carrots, broccoli, green beans, etc., and then puree them and put them in ice cube trays and then into labeled gallon size ziploc bags. So, when I needed to feed them, I just grabbed a cube or two of this and that and put it on a plate and into the microwave. It was so simple to do. When I ran out of something, I cooked that particular veggie and did it again. It was so much cheaper and easier.

Good luck!

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C.C.

answers from Columbia on

Everything your twins are eating is just fine. At that age they are none to be picky. As long as they are eating and getting full and not eating tons of cookies and etc they will be just fine. Veggies are hard and they can tell when you are really trying to sneak something onto them. Have you tried sweet potato pie? Try just giving them that and nothing else until they at least try it. Kind of give them the no choice attitude and see how that goes.
Try not to stress out too much. At least you are lucky and they will drink fruit juice...my daughter never would at that age. Oh, and you should wait on peanut butter until they are 2 years of age.
I hope this helps!

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H.S.

answers from Savannah on

I'm going to go against the grain and say that baby food is good. The way I figure it is a much healthy/balanced way to go than fried foods and sugary foods. The added bonus is that it travels well. I wouldn't do all baby food, so that she can get used to the texture. We had a texture issue with our son to and he is now 2 1/2 and has out grown it. This probably sounds bad but we definitely bribed him into eating things. If you want this applesauce you have to eat some carrots. It really worked. We don't have to do it nearly as much anymore, but it still works. I know it can be frustrating but it will get better.

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S.M.

answers from Atlanta on

Well, here's the thing - if she's willing to eat baby food and it's healthier than most of the other stuff, I think you'll be doing her a LOT better to continue with that.
Beats the heck out of Lunchables and hotdogs, nutrition-wise, and the longer you have her eating vegetables, the more it will shape her palate. You're obviously very busy, so you need stuff that's QUICK!

Soup is a great way to get vegetables into their diet. My older son ADORES the smashed pea and barley soup from California Pizza Kitchen, so I got the recipe for that and make big batches that freeze well. But canned soups can also work, especially if you get ones from the health food section since they usually have less salt. (We like Amy's -they make a very mild chili, and wonderful lentil soup.)
And Publix and Kroger now sell a very mild hummus (I think it's called Sabra) that's excellent for dipping whole grain crackers in. What is it about dipping? Little kids just LOVE to dip!

I've noticed that since my younger child (just turned 2)has been on table food, he's been getting fewer vegetables. So guess what? Even though he's been off baby food for a while now, I'm going to be whipping up a batch of veggie food cubes this weekend, because that way he actually eats lentils and rice, sweet potatoes, veggie medleys.

I work full time and have 2 kids, so my shortcut is to get some frozen veggies at Trader Joes (no added sauces or anything), steam them, put them in a blender with some water, to quickly puree, and turn them out into ice cube trays. (If I'm doing that at the same time that I'm making dinner, it takes basically no time at all, just multi-tasking.) Usually, I keep a few quart-sized bags in the freezer with orange cubes, green cubes, and some kind of rice and lentil cubes, and then I can mix and match them.
Yeah - probably more work than you'll be able to do, but it's a trade-off of time and money.

Oh! A good peanut butter substitute at this age is sunflower seed butter You can find it at Trader Joes, Whole Foods, places like that. (Even more delicious is pumpkin seed butter, although that's harder to find.) Sunflower seeds and pumpkin seeds aren't nuts and don't have the allergy issues that peanuts and "tree nuts" have.
Also good for nut-free schools and classrooms.

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S.G.

answers from Savannah on

Be gone with baby food and I'd stop with the Lunchables too. Especially if they are going to daycare, they should be getting snacks and meals provided to them there. If you put something in front of her and she won't eat it, then so be it. How do and your hubby react when she knocks something off the tray?? All drama like, over animated like the airplane flying in her mouth??? Stop any reaction as well. You are giving her dinner entertainment. If you want dinner and a show, go to Midevil Times!! Don't even pick the food up off the floor either till she is out of the room, no laughing, crying or cringing. And if you are giving her the baby food as a last resort, you have given her control over the situation. She knows you aren't going to let her go hungry so you'll pull out all the stops just to make her happy!! It gives her control of the situation!!!

A child will not starve themselves first of all. You need to feed her the same thing the other sister is eating. When she knocks it to the floor, you don't give any reaction except to pick it up and put it back on her tray (or get up to give her more). Also, give food in small quanties, a few bites at a time. If she knocks the second helping to the floor, it stays there, you don't get up to get more or make any reaction and she sits in her chair till the rest of the meal is finished. Don't look at her either if she starts to throw any fits either. When dinner is done, she may get down from the table. NO TALKING to her either while this is going on!!!! Same goes for breakfast and lunch as well. Give this routine a few days and I'll bet you anything she'll start eating what you give her or at least give it a try!!

It may sound mean, but it's not, she won't starve either. Be ready for some melt downs as well. But YOU are the parent and will stay strong unless you want to plant a bananna tree in your back yard!! lol Kids are creatures of habit and you are changing a bad one is all!!

Good luck!
S.

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