Help! New to This Staying-at-home Thing. How Do You Manage Your Time at Home?

Hi K.,
If they are in school, try to do things while they are gone. If they are at home, try to do things while they are sleep or preoccupied for long lengths of time. Try to do the major things first.

All the Best and Happy New Year!

That is a GREAT question! I don't know, except that the chores never end and are never done. The laundry is currently a huge pile (clean) on the floor that blocks entry into that room. How awful. :)
I did vacuum though. I feel like most of the day I do chores, but some days I do mostly playing. All chores happen holding a baby so I am SLOW at everything. I don't have time to grocery shop, and I've been trying to find time to order Schwan's but even that has not happened this week or last.
I think as the kids get older it will be easier since they are 3, 2 and 5 months.
Even if I cleaned all day it would not mean a spotless house. Have fun, get out of the house... Urbana surely has some kiddie stuff. I went to college there. Beautiful place to raise a family!

K., if you are feeling guilty then stop cleaning and play with your two beautiful boys. I have two beautiful boys. No now they are two beautiful men. And I wish I would have the time back to play with them. You can clean, clean, clean someday when you alone and it doesnt matter anymore. So straighten if you have to, kick the cobwebs aside there is an old saying that goes something like that and that 'babies dont keep' and it is so true. Enjoy your boys NOW. They are so special.

Hi K., I've been at home with our daughter since August and I've learned it's all a Go With the Flow thing. We have a schedule that she sets with her napping and then we work around that. We ususally get up, have breakfast, then she plays for about 15 mins while I do dishes or start laundry, then we play until she gets tired for her morning nap. While she naps I do computer things or whatnot. Then it's lunch. We run errands after lunch if she is in a good mood (read as - her teeth aren't bugging her too much), otherwise we play. Then afternoon nap and dinner. This week we added in swimming after lunch on Monday and Play Gym after lunch on Tuesday, leaving the rest of the week open. Hope this helps.

I've been doing this now for 14 years and I just want to tell you that you should make up your own rules. Decide how much mess you can live with and then don't let anyone make you feel guilty about your housekeeping. Spend as much time as you can playing with your kids, but don't beat yourself up for wanting and needing some creative/adult outlet for yourself. DOn't ruin your time by trying to please anyone else who thinks homes should be spotless or moms should never get babysitters or sit the kids in front of the tv. The whole goal is for you to get enough fulfillment and enjoyment out of being a stay at home mom that it works and that the kids get the benefit of your daily love and care. Good luck!

Check out FlyLady.net!!! She saved my sanity. She's all about managing the home but not letting it run you, making time to PLAY and taking care of yourself. She is the best guru to at-home moms!

Congrats on getting to stay home!
D.

Please don't make a schedule. Only clean when it's necessary. There are so many more important things than a clean house. (Obviously the dishes and laundry need to get done, but not much else.)

Just "hang" with your kids. Enjoy life as they do, and appreciate every tiny pleasure that kids bring. Whether you are laughing along with their tv show, making a snow fort, creating a masterpiece out of playdo, or dancing to music, just BE THERE. Relax.

It will do yourself good to just let go of the perceived responsibility to keep a perfect house. As others have said, when they are bigger, you won't wish you had kept a cleaner house, you'll wish they were home to cuddle with you again.

Just do the minimum housework needed, so you won't go crazy, and let the rest go. My youngest started full time school this year, and I hate doing errands alone. Now I have no excuses to get stuff done. But you do.

Hi K....congrats on your new job!! staying athome with your kids is the most rewarding job ever...with the worst pay! :) im not sure how old your boys are but my advice is first take a few weeks and see what kind of routine your boys are used to...do they still nap? then i would work around that..i would designate certain times of the day for certain things...after breakfast give them some alone time while you clean up the kitchen...then maybe make beds and toss in a load of wash..then give them some mommy time books games toys etc. before lunch i would either do naps or have them play while u prepare lunch then in the afternoon same type of thing it has worked for me...i have a 3month old 3yr old and 6 yr old...i hope that helps..and for errands designate a day it will make your life easier!

I have found www.flylady.com VERY helpful.

Hi K.!

My daughter is 18 months old and I've been fortunate to stay home with her since she was born.

My schedule has changed depending on my daughters age and needs.
When she was a newborn I only did housework when she napped. The rest of the time was spent caring for her. Now that she's older I still do most of the housework while she naps but I'm also able to do somethings while she's up. I make a game out it with her. She's loves to "help" me clean. I give her a cleaning rag and she'll go around the room I'm working in and scrub things. :) Sometimes she wants to play by herself so I take that opportunity to do something (usually dishes).

I don't designate a day of the week for things. I just do them as I can. To me it's more important to play and teach my daughter than it is to make sure the house is spotless so I've learned to let somethings go that normally would bug me if they weren't done. My house is still clean but somedays it looks a bit cluttered. Dirty dishes in the sink, toys spread all through the house, laundry piled high....I do vacuum every morning though. Since she was born I've done this. I like knowing the floor is clean before she starts playing on it.
When my husband gets home from work our daughter is focused on him and I can get somethings done while they have some one on one time.

As far as errands go we share a car so it takes some coordination. For instance we make her well child check ups early in the morning, usually the first patient seen so we can get in and out before he goes to work.
I go to town for errands on Sat. when my husband is home. I get some alone time (which I use to feel guilty about, honestly I still kind of do) and my husband and daughter get more one on one time (which is important so the feelings of guilt I mentioned earlier aren't as bad now).

In short, do things as you can and try not to worry about things that don't get done. Enjoy your child and have lots of playtime! They are only little once. :)

hi there well i stay home during the day with my little one then work in the evening and the hubby takes her but here is a little of what i do. I always do breakfast with her in the mornig then after that i let her play so i can start a little laundry or do the dishes that were from the night befor just try to pick up some then after bout an hour hour and half we play together until lunch then we eat lunch together. after lunch she goes down for a nap so i finish the house work. i try to do the house work a few days aweek so it stays clean. i try to get all the running down to 2 days a week so that we dont have to be out all the time. well hope this helps a little. enjoy being home with your kids it wonderful to spend time together

Hi K.,
The best advice I can give you is BE WITH YOUR KIDS! My daughter is 5 and my son is 2 and the time goes so fast! Once they are in school, that's it - you have half days with them for the rest of their lives. I homeschooled my daughter instead of putting her in preschool and I'm so grateful I did. Now she's in full day Kindergarten and has friends and a little homework and other activities so my time with her seems so short now.

During the day, draw with your kids, sing songs, walk to the park, play games, teach them their alphabet.... Kids go to bed early, so at night, you can choose when you want to do laundry, dusting, organizing.... It's such a blessing to be home because you have time with your kids AND you can keep up with the housework. If you're bad at organizing your time, just make a schedule for yourself. For example, Tuesday night from 9-10: laundry. Wed night from 9-10: dusting. Thurs night from 9-10: pay bills... If you have to run errands during the day, take the kids. Don't try to cram too much in one day either - one thing at a time. Once you find your own groove, you will really be able to enjoy yourself! If you need to, you can schedule time with the kids too - give them time on their own as well during the day - you DON'T have to play with them every second!

Enjoy! It will pass by so quickly!

E.

Such good suggestions here, I have five kiddos and have been staying at home with them since first was born. I've seen and tried so many different things, and ultimately I had to choose what worked best for me and my kids. I did create a kind of 'schedule' and I use that word loosely, considering little kids keeping to it is hard. But putting things down as to how each day will run does help a lot. This way, things get done, kids have that time with Mom but also learn independent play, as well as helping Mom with chores. We have made lots of things around the house family chores, so it's not all on my shoulders. Oh, and when anyone in the house is sick, we absolutely get thrown off, but it's worth it to nurse a sick one back to health....(but if the kids are trained to help out, as they get older they just do it without being asked, and it gets MUCH better.)

Congrats on your decision to stay at home, it can be hard at times, but it's so valuable to your kids, they will thank you for it one day.
Good luck.

Hi K.. I am also a stay at home mom to my 2 kids--my son will be 3 in 2 weeks and my daughter is 4 months. When it was just my son, I tried to designate at least 20 minutes per hour as "play time" and the rest letting him play by himself while I did the household work. I tried to do stuff like paying bills or phone calls while he was napping. Now that I have a baby, too, it's harder to split my time. I just try to make sure I have uninterrupted "one on one" time with my son twice a day while my daughter sleeps. I take care of her and the housework can just get done when I have time. Sometimes my son helps with the chores, like helping me do laundry and sweeping the floors. I try to just put the kids first and everything else second, for right now. Anyway, hope this helps. Good luck!

Get the book "Family Manager" By Kathy Peel. Excellent.

I can't really give you advice but I just wanted to say that I love your question! I am a working mom but was at home for 2 weeks with my 20 month old son over the holidays and I felt that same tug-of-war--I never knew how much time to spend playing versus getting stuff done! Because of that, I said--I don't think I could ever stay at home because I was constantly feeling guilty that either I wasn't playing with him or I wasn't getting other stuff done!!! Anyway, I am sure you'll figure out a routine that works for you. Enjoy the time with the kids!

Well my mistake was I didn't manage my time and days. Start a weekday calendar. One day is laundry day, one day is house cleaning day but you find your cleaning more often now that your home and if you have kids that go to school, when they get home its bonding and homework time. And one day is bath day and if you prioritize and stay routine it works. I recently started getting bored and you dont make money staying home so I picked up a home business with MaryKay and that gives me the money and outlet and convenience of being my own boss and making my own schedule.Goodluck mommy,
Jennifer Wilson