Help!! Our 16 Month Old Is Scared of the Dark and His Night Light

It sounds like he really was scared of the shadows. My daughter just recently discovered shadows and was scared, too! She really freaked out when my husband made a dog shadow puppet. We didn't know it would scare her when he did that. But we've been talking about shadows and showing her her own shadow and pointing it out every time I can see a shadow anywhere. I also tell her to say hi to the shadow. She's not afraid anymore. I think it's kind of scary to be a toddler and not understand how things work. Shadows are not scary, so tell him so. Teach him what they are and how it works and it might help.

A.
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The nigth light did not work for my older daughter either. She used a full lamp. I thought the light would be to bright for her to sleep in but she loved it and never had a problem. I thought oh well her eyes are shut so it si not liek she is staring at the bulb all night long. Any wya it worked great and later we switched to colored light bulbs liek pink and green. Seh couldn't wait for the bulb to burn out to pick another cool color. Good luck!

Has he saw any scary TV shows that you happen to be watching, and not knew he was ?? You might try leaving the light completey on a few nights, so there won't be shadows. OR when you put him to bed sing a lullaby to him before you leave the room and pat him. Also the sleeping by him, like you said your husband did may not last but a few nights, so that your son feels secure. Sometimes just a few nights of something you try is all you have to do it,even if you have to start rocking him to sleep.

My 8 yr old just started not sleeping too..."it's too dark in the room" and has been asking for more light though he has a fairly bright night light. My 5 yr old daughter sleeps with a nightlight and a dimmer light on her dresser. I go in and turn it down to very soft light before I go to bed at night.

I did have to show them what the shadows were and that there was nothing in their room but God and his angels. When my son was younger (about 2-3) we had our dog come in an sniff under the bed, in the closet, or wherever else my son though "monsters" were hiding. Our dog would wag her tail and snort throughout the whole home and I had her sniff in my ear so I could tell my son she said it was all clear. He would then get concerned about outside, but I told him monsters do not like cats or dogs so they would not dare come near our house. I know you should confirm a fear of monsters, etc. but my son insisted they were real and had to be dealt with so we dealt with it...thankfully, that was a phase too.

We now pray at night together for sweet dreams and we ask God if he has the time to come and sit with the children as they sleep as well as send their personal guardian angel to watch over them.

You do need to watch what the see or hear these days. I sometimes believe that even his video games which are age appropriate give him bad thoughts. I just keep confirming that there is nothing in the house that will harm them and they should pray again for God to come sit with them so they can have a restful sleep.

Oh, we also play soft instrumental music in the background or the local Christian station at night to void out any "scary" sounds...like our neighbors loud dogs or rap music :0)

Hang in there, it will pass.

J.

I have not experienced this first hand, but I would suggest you walk your baby over to where the thing is that he is afraid of and show him it's ok. Then walk him back to his bed and tuck him in. I wouldn't change his environment. Apparently his imagination is working and you need to empower him to overcome it. Also, does he sleep with any toys? My 14 mo daughter sleeps with a stuffed puppy and a stuffed monkey (both small with sewn eyes and noses). She snuggles that puppy pretty tight at night. She also has a mirror in her crib with teething ring and activity toys around the frame. Maybe those things would help him also.

I'm sorry the little guy is going through this! GL!

Our 19-month old daughter does the same thing from time to time. We do not put her in our bed. We will do just about anything but that. She seems to go through phases. However, I started noticing that the fear of the dark and her room becomes intensified when my husband and I are gone a lot from her. (My husband travels a lot and I stay at home but we do have babysitters pretty regularly). Also, minimize his TV. Our daughter doesn't actually watch anything but Barney but you never know if I have the news on or something what she sees a glimpse of. Anyway, we alos have gotten into a very strict bedtime routine and that seem s to help her. Good luck, sleepless nights are the worst but it will get better.

You may try just leaving the door open all the way with the hall light on until he is asleep and then close the door. It keeps the shadows to a minimum. Or you can use a lamp instead of a night light.

I have heard that there are some light bulbs that stay on for only 30 minutes (they blink a few times when they are about to go off). This might be a good option to be sure the lamp does not stay on all night.

Playing soothing sounds in the room also helps. I used (and sometimes still do) a continuous playing CD with soft classical music and an oscilating fan (my 11yo still likes the fan).

Then there is the ever-popular teddy bear for him to hold for comfort.

I hope this helps.

Blessings,

P. <><

Our son went through something similar for a little while, and it was very upsetting for me. I did several things. First, I tweaked our bedtime routine a bit. He takes a bath, and I lotion his up, then we all cuddle on the couch and my husband reads either a short story or a poem, and then we do kisses and hugs as we're putting him in bed. I put my hand on his belly or head (depends on his mood) and pray over him (peace of mind, sweet restful sleep, etc) and then as we're walking out I hit play on his CD player. We play instrumental hymns, a soft worship CD, or Mozart adagios (just the adagios, b//c I don't want it too fast or suddenly loud, lol). The music is very low, but not so low that it sounds weird. It's all about family time and relaxing. We NEVER use the nightlights because they do leave weird scary shadows to a little one, or sometimes "morph" into an eerie glow as you start to drift off. If he "must" have light, I remember that as a small child a cute "real" lamp worked best for me. It lit up the whole room, but not bright like the overhead lights, and before mom went to bed she would slip in and turn the lamp off (I was asleep by then). No shadows that way. We keep the nightlight in the hallway for overnight guests to find their way to the bathroom and kitchen, but that's all. Sometimes our son has weird evenings where he seems to need more and if he won't settle in, I'll go in and stroke his hair while I pray over him, and then we'll leave his bedroom door open so he can hear us talking or playing cards. That way he knows we're right there.

my 4 year old son used to be the same way, he would wake up in the middle of the night and coming running in my room. I put a lamp in his room w/ a green light bulb so it's not so bright but it lights up his whole room. That seemed to calm him down alot.

It sounds to me like your 16 month old has figured out exactly what to say to get out of bedtime. How you handle it is up to you but the more you jump and run the more he will holler out and resist. Once the I'm scared thing doesn't work anymore he'll be on to I need to potty or I need a drink etc. Boy do they learn quick!