Help Very Cranky 4 Year Old After School

Yes this is normal. It still happens to my daughter who is eight. It gets better once their bodies adjust. It is also important to stick as close to a normal routine as possible.

A friend and I were just talking about this! Both our daughters seem to act up and be naughty and crabby after preschool. My daughter loves her preschool too but when I pick her up I almost cringe because I know pretty soon she will be giving me "attitude" and ending up in a time-out! My theory is that she has to listen and comply in school and then when she gets home she just needs to get the bad behavior out :)
I don't really have a solution except that I have tried not to engage in any battle of the wills right after school- telling her to do this or do that- lately she has taken time to ride her bike after and this seems to calm her down before lunch. I have also tried to let her make more choices about lunch and activities, etc. after school.
Also if you think she is tired, maybe a little quiet time either reading books or watching a movie would rest her sufficently without a nap- my daughter is the same way, if she takes a nap bedtime is going to be very late and I am not up for that!
Good luck- sorry I don't have many answers for you but just know others are in the same boat! I think it is a girl thing, my boys never acted this way after school!

Is it possible to go on a family walk after school or maybe get a read the book routine...Seems she is looking for some special attention after all that separation from her mom all day long....She might be tired but what harm would a 45 minute nap or snuggle time be? Just make noises or wake her for a favorite Tv show...or to help with dinner prep after 45 minutes...Once you establish a routine that gives her some attention after school, I am hoping that she settles in to enjoy coming home...
I had a mentally ill ex who saw the kids each weekend and when they returned my youngest little girl was similar to your daughter...I ended up always having a new trinket on her bed pillow so that she'd be welcomed home and distracted from the frustrating effects of her weekend with their father...I am not saying that that is the perfect solution but...as my 9 yr. old son said then...."Mom, you divored him but WE can't!"
With that in mind, you also might find time to visit your daughter's class while it is in session and get to know her teacher a bit so that she feels that you two are both a team and care about HER...Good luck super mom!

Yes, totally normal, and even my six year old is crabby after being at school all day. I have 3 in school, first grade, 4 yr old preschool 3x a week, and 2.5 year old preschool 1x a week. They are all crabby after school. They need some down time, and just to rest(well, my 2.5 year sleeps). She'll get used to it, and will not be as cranky. Congrats on your new baby!

I don't have any advice, but I am so glad to hear everyone else's responses! My 5 year old was fine after preschool, but that was mornings. Now she's in pm kindergarten and she comes home in the crankiest, whiniest mood ever. On really bad days, I tell her it's a mandatory nap day, and she has to go up to her bedroom with her toes in her bed for at least 1/2 hour (she's allowed to read but she has to rest). Otherwise I'm just dealing with it. Very helpful to hear that everyone else is having the same experience!

I think it is normal, at least both my girls have behaved the same way! Sometimes #1 would scream hysterically for miles on the way home because I had turned right when she had wanted me to turn left. #2 did the same thing last week because I had given her three crackers - she wanted four. :) When they are like that you just can't reason with them (although I don't have the self-control to stop trying!) I guess they are just tired or overwhelmed or both. I don't think it would hurt to let her lie down and rest or nap when she gets home. Maybe you could test it on a Friday afternoon to see whether it would interfere with bedtime/wake-up time? Hang in there!

My kids have done the same thing. Even if they like school, it's still a lot more stimulation and activity than they're used to and it takes time to get into the routine. I'm sure your daughter is exhausted! :) I would suggest that you give her a snack when she gets home (something with protein is best) and then have a quiet time where she can watch a movie or do something else where she's settled and not all over the place. You'll probably find that she's much more refreshed after a little break and that she can handle the evening better.

I assume she is in afternoon preschool. If that's the case I suggest putting her in morning so when she gets home she can eat lunch then take a nap.