Help with Birthing Methods

Updated on May 07, 2009
L.S. asks from Muskegon, MI
21 answers

I am currently pregnant for the 4th time but this will be my 2nd child. My L&D the 1st time was the worst experiance anyone I've ever talked to has heard of. I developed pre-eclampisa and had to be on lot of med for the delivery. Since having had 2 m/c's I have learned I have 2 blood clotting probelms and am on blood thinners. To make a long story short. depending on how things progress with this baby I might not be able to have an epidural. I have avery low tolerance for pain and this scares me very much. I started looking at natural child birth methods, and now I'm thinking even if I can have an epidural I might not want one. However with my complications I know I will have to go with the flow. I have been trying to learn as much about the different methods of Child birth and hypnobirthing and Bradly both intrest me. However I don't have the money, to take a class. My DH is willing to try to support me though this although in my last L&D he didn't say one word as he was just so scared/shocked/and worried about me. Anyway I am looking for any advise/help anyone can offer since I can't afford to take a class. Also I have looked and I live in a smaller town and there isn't anyone close to where I live that teach these methods without driving 45-60 minutes. Having a 2 1/2year old that doesn't really work.

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F.W.

answers from Detroit on

I don't know abaout those methods, BUT, I can tell you that 2nd births are not like the first,they are way easier! I had one of those pre-eclamptic, 2-3 day controlled labor & deliveries for my first, and the 2nd was the total opposite. So try not to worry about it being like the first one, the first is the worst, and it gets easier all the way around.

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D.H.

answers from Detroit on

Congratulations on your pregnancy! You may want to look into using a doula during your delivery. I have never used one, but I have heard from friends (especially those whose husbands aren't the greatest at being a labor coach) that they are wonderful. Since money is an issue, you can look for a student doula who will do it for free or very cheap. If you go to DONA.org, you can find more info on doulas as well as a directory for each state. You may also find a referral through your local La Leche League (llli.org). Good luck!

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R.H.

answers from Detroit on

Hi L.,

I'm pretty sure there are some sources online that you can get hypnobirthing 'classes' in book form, or on CD's. Much cheaper then a class. I know one woman who is doing it this way and is very excited about her upcoming birth.

In addition, as already mentioned....getting in the tub can be GREAT!!!!

Have you considered a home birth? I know that sounds like a crazy way to save money...but quite honestly, I have looked into it and the cost of it is just about what you would pay in most co-pays with insurance. Homebirth midwives often have many techniques to help you through the labor pains.... like a home water birth etc....

I will say, a strong labor partner is important. You need someone to help you focus on something other than the pain...to help you focus on WHY you are going through the pain. Talk to your husband.... be honest.... be open...come up with a plan that works for the both of you.

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D.K.

answers from Detroit on

I agree with Audrey. It is amazing. I had 2 epidurals and one natural. the natural was by far the easiest with recovery. I put my pelvis out of place with my 2nd epidural, because I couldn't feel my legs and everyone was pulling them apart in all directions. It took me a week to walk again. My first epidural, I ended up with 6 holes in my back because the dr. couldn't get it in. Then ended up w/ a spinal headache. Took a week to recover. Yes the pain does get intense when you go natural. But what I did was rock back and forth on a birthing ball. It opens your pelvis and it moves the baby through the birth canal FAST!!! It went so fast they ended up telling me to stop pushing because they weren't ready. (Yah right!!!) After it's all said and done you really do feel good after the delivery. No meds to wear off, full use of your legs, it is the way to go. I really don't think you need any classes, as your body just takes over anyway. Just focus on moving in ways to get the baby to descend faster, and breath. Good luck.

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J.D.

answers from Grand Rapids on

where are you located? I teach a natural childbirth class. I would be willing to teach you for just the cost of supplies ($25-30). I live in hudsonville, and don't know how far that would be for you.
also I would reccomend hiring a doula, if it is too expensive, you can find one in training that will do it for little or no cost. They are definiatly worth it if you want to go natural.
you can e-mail me if you have any questions about doulas and where to find a cheap/free one.
J.

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H.B.

answers from Detroit on

I have had 4 births. One epidural, one IV meds, and 2 without so much as a tylenol. The last 2 were very fast and painful. I felt that breathing through them was helpful, but I though that massaging my own thighs was very helpful. It gave me something to do, and the sensation of something other then the pain helped. Of course, with your clotting problem, please ok that with your OB. I agree that this baby will probably come much faster and easier. My first was 31.5 hours of labor, the second 2.75 hours, the third 2.5, and the last a mere 57 minutes! (There will be no more for me, I'd probably have it in the car!)

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K.V.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I just thought I'd add that some insurances will pay for child birth classes. Ours did. You might want to look into that.

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J.S.

answers from Grand Rapids on

L.,
You have received lots of great advice that all sound great. Consider visiting the library and see if they have any yoga or meditation videos or books for pregnancy. Even having taken a Bradly Method class and reading up on hypno-birthing, I found it was the core elements of the deep breathing from yoga and focusing the mind on something besides the pain was the primary for both methods.

Your husband will not feel so helpless this time around. I found my hubby utterly useless the first time. After reflection I realized how completely terrified he was to experience me in such pain and helpless to do anything about it. Your husband has now been through it once. He knows what to expect and that you were ok in the end. He will have the capacity to be there for you more this time, like my husband.

One user suggested finding yourself a student doula. You might also reach out to area midwives in the area. http://michiganmidwives.net/ See if your insurance will cover their services or if they have a student who needs hours towards their certification.

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B.B.

answers from Detroit on

I can honestly say after having 3 kids that there is no specific plan... Learn all you can about all the plans and do what YOU feel you need to do at that moment.

I had an epidural with my first and that labor ended up being 23 hrs long with 3 hrs of very innefectual pushing. 8lb 3 oz girl.

My next 2 I said "I don't do drugs" and instead got in the tub... WOW what a difference! I highly recommend the tub!!! I couldn't have the jacuzzi on, it irritated me, but just the warm water was AWESOME. It sped things up and loosened things up down there too. :-) Both those baby boys (9lbs 7 oz, 9 hr induced labor, and 10 lbs even with a 5 hr induced labor ) were born with less than 15 minutes of pushing, no episiotemies, and a mom that was really relaxed. :-)

Use the internet (like you are) to read up on many methods but really the most important thing is to be comfortable with yourself and learn how to focus on the goal.

Maybe talk to the nurses at the hospital. They have probibly seen ALL the methods and non methods and can sorta give you tips on what worked and what didn't...

And yes, each birth gets EASIER!!!!!

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S.B.

answers from Detroit on

I took my classes online for free thru
http://pregnancy.about.com/od/childbirtheduc/a/cbeclass.htm

There were some good tips included. I had a natural birth, no drugs, no screaming. I breathed deaply thru the painful contraction while squeezing my husbands hand. This was my 1st child. I think it helped too that when I got to the hospital I was already 8cm & 100% effaced. I focused on the sign on the wall it said something like 'in a few minutes this will all be over and when you look at your baby, you'll forget all about this...' Best wishes!

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A.M.

answers from Detroit on

Look for a doula in your area. Our doula made all the difference in the world! She was emotionally supportive as well as applied pressure to my hips during the contractions which helped sooooo much! I don't know why the nurses don't know how to do this move!! But she gave me confidence in my body, that I would do fine, helped my husband know what to do, she was just so experienced...everyone should use one! They are so great!! Please look one up and interview one or two. I could go on and on about how great it is to have one as your advocate both before labor and during!

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R.G.

answers from Detroit on

I've heard wonderful things about water births as well as the birthing bar. :)
Good luck and God bless.

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H.S.

answers from Detroit on

L.,

I wish you all the luck in the world. When I had my son, I didn't have an epidural, I used Morphine. It doesn't take away all of the pain, but it does help dull it a little.

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M.W.

answers from Kalamazoo on

We did Bradley and were very happy with it. I'd look at your local library and see if they have any books/videos about the Bradley Method. Its possible to educate yourself at home, though the class helps a lot. Working on the nutritian aspect and the streches are very important to get your body ready for this "athletic event" of birth. All that can easily be done at home. The most important part about the class was learning about all the interventions, their risks and how they are helpful - so YOU make the decision about what you want to do. This doesn't mean you don't listen to your doctor, but if they say do you want this or this, you can know which you'd rather do, or if they suggest something you can say, hey what about trying this first... It just is very empowering. I'm sure the books cover this stuff as well, its just not in a conversational type environment. The last thing is learning how to relax. Bradley does not do rhythmic breathing like Lamaze does, however learning to take long deep breaths and focus your mind on something helps A LOT!!! I watched the clock to time my contractions, after 30 seconds of them getting stronger they ALWAYS started to decline at that 30 sec. point - even if that part took a minuet or longer. Its really like a marathon, you gear up for the long haul, but also focus on getting through each small step as well.

Your husband will be invaluable if you go with this method. Be sure he's in touch with your birth plan (he's supposed to be like the guard dog, answering questions for you and such so you can relax, and keeping people from bothering you while you labor) and knows ways to massage your back when you're uncomfortable. My husband struggled through this part, he's very jittery (hyperactive, not worried) and drove me crazy until my mom gave him a laptop to surf the web with. ;) However, he was great during the pushing stages. We need to practice more relaxation techniques for this 2nd time around since my family might not be here to help us.

If you have any other questions please let me know I'd be happy to explain anything to you! Congratulations on your pregnancy!

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S.M.

answers from Saginaw on

Hello L., I also had blood clots during my pregnancies, and had to give myself injections of hepren every 12 hours. The most important thing is to be off of the blood thinners before labor begins(3-4 weeks). Relaxation techniques worked the best for me while in labor. I tried the lamaz(sp?), but kept hyperventilating, so the doc told me to just relax and the breathing would happen naturally. All three of mine were natural births. Play soothing music, keep the lights down, don't have alot of people in the birthing room, and make sure that those who are there keep quiet. Focus on the music, and relaxing during the contractions. Good luck and congradulations. P.S. Don't do a home birth, you are high risk being on blood thinners!

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B.J.

answers from Detroit on

Hi L., it a boy, congradulations. With medical concerns, best to have great faith in the Dr. and let him, or her help in any way possible. That being said, I have delivered 4 girl's, 3 natural, 1 with epidural. The natural birth's alto painful, I prefere. During one birth the Dr. was standing their talking to my husband, and blocking the view of my focal point, hard to talk when in laybor, get a good coach, practice, and breath. Most of all relax, don't fight the pain, breath through it. Remember situations in your past that you were worried about, and that they turned out fine, and later you thought what was I so worried about. This is one of those situations, everything is going to be fine. Take Care.

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E.M.

answers from Detroit on

I just gave birth to my second son two weeks ago. I had a midwife and a doula. I wanted to go natural but was scared. I read up on everything I could.

I can tell you it is hard but you will be amazed at what you can do. I was so proud of myself. Christa, my doula made all the difference in the world. She knew just what to do and when. I know you are short on cash, some work with you if you make under a certain amount of money.

I delivered at Southfield Providence - the staff was great. No one offered me drugs since I told them I did not want them. Where I had my first son they would have been all over me with drug options. Everyone was so supportive.

I did end up with a c-section (my son would not move down because of his position) but we tried everything to prevent it. I was very happy with how it went. My first was a c-section too.

Nine Short Months is the name of the practice my doula works with.

Good luck!

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T.K.

answers from Detroit on

Hi L.,
I was living in Brazil with no access to classes when I was pregnant with my first child. I now have 3 and prego with #4. I used thge knowledge of Hypnobirthing. I had the book and the affirmation tapes. They are really get and the book is well written. Of course nothing can really prepare you for the pain of birthing. I did have an unmedicated birth,thru much screaming. One thing I can tell you is that not all you births will be the same. Each of my births are more painless, and much quicker than the previous one. I am down to about and hour and a half now ( hope I can make it to the birthing center in Southfield, from Rochester!)
I would highly reccomeend Hypnobirthing, even if you don't do it exactly right, knowing how to keep calm does help and the affirmations that I said over and over really helped me thru the delivery. I am sure you can get the book and tapes with out the class. I am also sure someone is around to help ask questions you may have since you'll purchase the materials.
Good Luck!
T. K.

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J.M.

answers from Detroit on

I absolutely recommend researching a doula. There is one and she is part of Mamasource. Excellent choice to help you decide what to do. You do have to pay out of pocket but she is a licensed doula and licensed swedish massage therapist. I used her with my one and only pregnancy and would not hesitate to use her again. Her website is:
www.tranquiltouchforwomen.com
I also have a few personal friends who have used her as well. I cannot say enough. Whether you decide to use her or not she is an excellent resource of info and I would at least suggest the initial consultation. And you stay firm not to find out what you're having. We didn't either and we got lots of pressure. I had the ultrasound tech just black it out with a marker so no one would slip up and say anything. There isn't much to be surprised about anymore and we wanted to be surprised. I wouldn't change a thing. Best wishes. J.

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A.D.

answers from Detroit on

I too would recommend a doula, I also used tranquil touch massage as my doula with my first pregnancy. With the 2nd pregnancy we did it on our own. I was able to have both of my children without any epidurals or medication-all natural. The after results are amazing! The baby is much more awake after birth than those medicated. My doula was very beneficial. Also I read the bradley method which help me with breathing. No classes were taken. Alot people told me that the classes are a waste of time because you forget how to do it when your actually in labor. I don't know, but having someone there that is experience and can give you different positions to go in while in labor really helped. Check my doula out on mamasource!

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O.K.

answers from Lansing on

Just wanted to let you know, I was diagnosed with two clotting disorders during my pregnancy with my son and put on blood thinners. (Aren't those shots great?) I was very nervous about the idea about of no epidural. I expressed concern to my OB and hematologist and they did everything they could to make sure I could get the epidural, including setting me up for an inducement and switched my blood thinner. I did end up getting it and it was great.

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