Help with Finding Better Ways to Spread My Time!!!

I, too, recommend flylady.net. I've been getting the emails for a few years and it's really helped me. I've read lots of testimonials from people with situations like yours and how much her system has helped them. I have three kids myself and health issues that affect my energy levels. I could not do it without flylady. The emails can be a lot, but they help keep me on track and if they're too much, that's why you have a delete key. :) There's also a link to what sounds like a really fun way to teach kids how to clean: www.housefairy.org. I haven't tried it, but the testimonials about it sound very promising.

If you can, I also recommend finding a housekeeper, at least while your kids are so little, to take some pressure off yourself. Having small kids and health issues can be very overwhelming, so it might be worth the investment. I found a housekeeper who is willing to put things away and change linens, as well as general cleaning. Unfortunately, her schedule is full, or I'd give you her name! But try looking on Craigslist or on the Mamasource site, or even call churches to find someone you can trust.

Good luck! I hope you find something that works for you!

Since writing a list is difficult for you have someone help you. I have a cleaning schedule of what gets cleaned what days. It works out pretty well and it is very quick to do it, since it is span out over the whole week.

If you want I can make a copy for you and get it to you.

My sister deals with bipolar and has the same issue with being able to sit still...but she also needs to have that controllable sanity and peace. When everything surrounds you and you feel you aren't getting much else done but thinking about how to get it done...that alone can cluster you more. I have helped her (as well as myself) getting a system down a little more than thinking it up on her own.

With three kids honey, it is no wonder your house is cluttered...mine is too...I remember the days before children when I could follow through on one project at a time, complete it anally organize it...instead now with two kids and two dogs a cat and a soon-to-be husband...I have 8 million projects and gradually get one done at a time....if not have 6 half done and 20 waiting...

R.,

I also think Flylady would work for you. I am using the system & it has helped. Routines are the most important thing to get under control.

Good luck!

I too have depression and ADHD, so I know what you are going through. I have now become the queen of lists. I have a chore list which lists each room that I have to clean. When I get done with a room I mark it off on my check list. I even have tow lists for my morning routine and night time routine and that helps me with taking care of my kids. Also designate one day/time that is set aside for you. Sunday mornings are my set time. I get up make myself a cup of coffee and I take a hot bath. My husband takes care of the kids.

You could try and run your household sorta like a homedaycare with a schedule and stick to it. Making sure the kids are all up by 8am, do certain things with them in the am, then after lunch around 1pm it should be nap time for the two younger one's and quiet time for the 6year old and Mom's personal break time. Plan fun things during the week like outings, and make a list of what your going to clean like do one room a day. The 6 year old should beable to help with most things and take care of their bedroom.

I'm a huge fan of getting outside and getting fresh air. It wears kids out good for naps and is so relaxing for adults and we need sunshine and air. I love to go outside, I forget about the phone, and what's going on inside.

I started out small. Like I wrote on the calendar that Monday was my sheet washing day. I wrote it down to give me some accountablity. I haven't progressed past that, but I'm working on it.

Maybe set aside Weds night as your going out for a cup of coffee night. Leave the kids behind and just spend an hour having a cup of coffee and reading a book, or going through that magazine you've been meaning to.

Just an idea, good luck.

Hi R.,

One thing that gets me moving is http://www.flylady.net/. It's free, and has helped THOUSANDS of people. She and her crew are the BEST, really care about and support you, and humorously give you the kick in the "ahem" that you need. Even people with severe disabilities have used her methods and feel better about themselves and get everything taken care of. The main thing to remember is that you have to take babysteps to get where you want to be...a little bit at a time...and that includes taking care of YOU, too.

My house was (still is, a bit) in CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) but it's getting better every day...thanks to her constant encouragement and all the testimonials from other FLYBabies (remember the babysteps). Her emails and the testimonials say it better than I can, but whenever I feel like wishing I lived in LA and calling Clean House or looking at a pile and walking away, I read one (or more) of her emails and I feel better about myself and get moving.

She has an already-made Control Journal you can purchase, but she also has the steps to make your own...for the lists you want to make of things to do. Another thing is to just start your list...and add to it whenever you have 30 seconds, 2 minutes, 10 minutes, etc. The big thing is to get started and just do a little bit every day.

Give it a try...and adjust it to your needs and abilities. It's seriously worked for people all over the world...

Good luck and I wish you the best of luck in learning to FLY (Finally Loving Yourself)...with or without FLYLady's help.

YOu could start with joining a moms group in your area, there are tons of groups on www.meetup.com. YOu really need to talk with your husband/significant other to let him know that you need more hlep and a little more time to your self. Pick a night that works for you and designate that night/afternoon to YOURSELF, EVERY WEEK! Don't make excuses that you cant do it, if you start it up now, it will become a normal activity and your kids/hubby will become accustom to it as well.
Try making small lists, starting with what is most important to you. Make a schedule of what time the kids eat their meals, nap, etc.work in a small activity while the kids eat or nap. Nap time is also a great time to catch a 30 minute rest.

Also, your six AND 2 year old can help with some of the chores as well, especially the 6 year old, make a small list of activities that he/she might like to do or are simple tasks i.e. take the breakfast/lunch dishes and put them in the sink, throw away any garbage. Help unload the dishwasher, (no knives of course). Kids LOVE to help out. My 19 month LOVES to sweep (not really sweeping, but hey, it does clean-up some of the dirt). Give your 2 year old a shot at some of the chores too. They could help make lunch, or butter toast, etc. You shouldn't have to do ALL of the work, enlist the help of your family, hey, they make the mess more than you do :)

Whatever you do, start small and work your way up. Lists can become overwhelming but in due time it will work out. Good luck! and don't forget to MAKE time for yourself,