Help with My Picky Eater!!!

Try making the veggie dishes into a funny face on the plate, cucumbers for eyes, carrots for hair, brocoli for the mouth...maybe set up all the veggies in there own bowl and get some dips out...kind of like fajitas but with veggies....make you're own veggie girl/boy and have everyone including you make their own veggie person then eat it, making game out of it. Whatever gets them to eat at least a little veggies. They might like V-8 juice.....my son did. Good luck to you picky eaters are so hard to deal with, My husband is worse then the kids! LOL! Take care!

My daughter went through the picky eater phase, and is just now starting to come out of it a little. I know how frustrating that it is, and how it can make you feel like a bad parent sometimes. What I do with my daughter is before her plate even touches the table, I tell her that I don't expect her to like everything on the plate, but I do expect her to try everything on her plate and for her to be a big girl about it. If she acts up, or spends the whole meal complaining about it, then it's jammie and bedtime after dinner. You're doing a good job with the vitamins, though. Also, if you are concerned about what she is taking in, spend more time focusing on the week than in the day. Sometimes she may only take in one of something, but the next day, she may triple what she needs in that day. Try "mealtime solutions for your baby, toddler and preschooler." This book really helped me out a lot! It's part of the mother of all solutions series by Ann Douglas. I found mine at Half Price Books, but I'm sure you can find a copy at borders or whatever is convenient to you. Good luck, and remember to stand your ground!!!

Two questions... 1, did she ever eat veggies and like them? 2, how new is the situation with dad and boyfriend?
If she used to eat them and now refuses, I would think it's more of a power play... she may feel like that is the only thing she has control over, the only choice she gets to make for herself and you can't do anything about it. My kids did this when my husband and I first got together. They refused to eat anything I cooked. However, a rule quickly went into place... anyone who doesn't eat their dinner goes directly to bed. They began liking a lot real quick.
Also, she could be looking for attention... kids will do it in a lot of different ways in a new situation. And new to a 5 year old could be anything in the last 18 months because they hang onto everything you say and do. If you make a big deal out of her not eating things, and you do everything you can to make her happy with it... she will continue to do it even if that isn't the reason to begin with. She will learn that she likes the attention you're giving her... what kid doesn't like undivided attention? No matter where it comes from.
I would suggest setting down a rule about her eating and simply telling her when she doesn't eat.. "you know the rule....". I give my kids one more chance to think about this and then enforce the rule. Two of my kids were 5 when I started this... they're now 7 and doing great. I also had one that was 5 and still wearing a size 2T when I started this... he is now a 4-5T... he'll always be small, but at least he has some meat on him!

You could try fruit smoothies, and just call them milk shakes.

My son (now 8) went through a picky eating state early on. Our strategy was to not make a fuss about it, but also to not cave in and serve special stuff. We made dinner, which may have included items he "didn't like" or refused to eat. Any whining was mostly dealt with by saying that this is what's for dinner, it's the food on your plate, eat it or don't eat it, but there certainly doesn't need to be any freaking out about it. We didn't make any special food just for him, and other than a rule of trying one bite of everything served, if he didn't eat a certain thing on his plate, that was fine.

However, it is important (I think) to establish the rule of try one bite of everything. That's a rule to this day. There are certain foods that my son legitimately doesn't like (green peppers, for example). He tried them several times, and it's clear it's a taste thing and not any phase or stubbornness, so we respect his dislike and don't serve him that food. But it takes awhile to differentiate between a phase and true dislike, as kids' tastes change as they develop. At 4, he decided he didn't like potatoes. It lasted about a year, he kept trying one bite any time there was a potato in front of him, and then one day realized that he liked potatoes. He also decided for awhile that he didn't like "soup" though if we served him soup and called it "stew" or "noodles in sauce" he would gobble it up.

If you're concerned about your daughter's weight, I would definitely take her in to her pediatrician and make sure there's not a medical cause. The reality, I find, is that kids will eat when they're hungry. Maybe she tries to push boundaries for awhile to see how much she can play on your mommy guilt and worry, but eventually, if chicken and broccoli is what's for dinner, she'll be eating chicken and broccoli.

And really? Any melt-downs should be sent away from the table, don't you think? Emotions are great and I encourage them, but the family table isn't the place. If she's upset, have her get down and go to her room - not as a punishment, but just as a "hey sweetie, it's okay to be upset, but you need to take it to your room. When you're feeling better, come on back".

I believe that kids are just little bundles of feelings and thoughts and opinions and emotions and they're learning every day to sort through them and figure out who they are. It's our job as parents to provide boundaries, so they feel safe and can clearly see where those limits are and work on keeping themselves within them. Consistency and maintaining your own even, understanding tone is the key! :)

First of all, I would definitely get her in to see her doctor to make sure that there is not something wrong. There probably isn't but it is always better to be safe than sorry. You might also try to "hide" veggies in food, like make a stir fry, or a casserole with veggies diced up inside it, or something similar, that way she eats it all together and doesn't see "veggies" first thing....if they are diced and mixed in she may not even realize it. Good luck and hang in there. Just remember that you are the parent and she is the child....stay firm and be CONSISTENT. Always follow through with what you have said, but make sure that you don't make "threats" or promises that are impossible to follow through with...like you are going to sit there until it is all gone, b/c that could go on for hours or days, which is not realistic, b/c honestly no mother is going to make their child sit there for 2 days, and she knows this. Again, good luck.
A.

You can try sneaking some veggies into stuff that she does eat. (shredded carrots into Mac n Cheese, you can put all sorts of veggies into spaggeti and meat loafs.) Just chop or grate the veggies so small that she doesn't notice them and if she does just say "well that is how I cook _____. It tastes better that way."

Another thing that makes a big difference is to cut down on the milk. My son wasnt eating dinner and I found out it was because he had three glasses of milk between lunch and dinner and the milk was filling him up. I reduced it to three glasses of milk per day (given 1 hour after each meal) and he eats great now.

Also remember, your childs stomache is only the size of her fist, so she doesnt need to eat a large quantity of food to be full.

Oh lordy! I kind of know the feeling. Some vegetables I try with my daughter she loves, but she can be very picky too. Have you tried giving her veggies and ranch dip? My kids love that. :) The ranch might help put a few pounds on her too. I am having a hard time with my kids getting them to eat home cooked meals. I didn't cook much when they were little so they have aquired some fatty food habits. I made a new chicken recipe tonight, with breaded zucchini, and they wouldn't give it a second look. They love sandwiches, hot dogs, chicken nuggets, bb&j....but I'm sure they've got to get bored with the same stuff??!! I know this may not be the answer you were looking for...but what if you puree the veggies and put them into your meals...ex: meatloaf, spaghetti, etc. She will just think it's sauce and eat it right up!! I had to do that with my kids meds when they were little :P Maybe this will help! I wish you luck!! :)
K.

I use to have a picky eater too. She wouldn't touch veggies and would only eat eggs, cereal and plain stuff like that. After about 2 years now she eats whats in front of her. She still complains and takes forever, but she knows she has to eat it. I just don't give her a choice. We use to have a rule, that if you don't eat you don't get dessert. Then that became less effective, so we gave a time limit. Half an hour, if you're not done you go to bed half hour early. I followed through. She now likes veitnamese beef noodle soup, mongolian grill, brocilli, asparagas, toasted cheese sandwhiches, chicken noodle soup, chilli, enchilladas, etc. There are still things she fights over, but I just tell her, you don't have to like it you just have to eat it. Don't watch them when they make faces, just eat your dinner lay down the consequences and stick to eat. It's a long process, but I'm glad I went through it. And oh, my daughter is still so thin. She's 10 and weighs only 49 pounds and is only 46 inches tall, some kids are just tiny. Good luck

hello, my cousin had the same problem, i can just sugest this.
She didnt make him eat it she just gave a protein shake with his meals. It kinda works since they are good and kids love them, also you would get the proteins and the vitamins that she is missing.
just a suggestion and im sorry about my spelling. good luck
M.

My daughter is 5 yrs old and i tend to have the same "veggie problem". i found that putting things (dressings, cheese, stuff she DOES like) on simple veggies gets her to eat it. like i take cold peas (frozen defrosted ones taste better) mix it with thousand island dressing then put shredded cheese on it. or ill give her raw carrots with ranch dip. In the beggining though she refused EVERYTHING so i made a deal i fed her one bite so she could "taste" it every night or she wasnt allowed desert. she still SWORE she hated them but now she eats corn peas and raw carrots... better than nothing! if your still worried like i was about nutrition i started buying the pediasure drinks. it will help bring up her weight. (oh and if all else fails... I learned shredding and chopping veggies VERY tiny and mixing them in the food i made was also a good way to sneak in those vitamins. they eat vegitables and don't know it and you know they are getting what they need.)

Hi C.. I have the same issue with my three and a half year old son. The only time he's ever eaten vegetables was when he first started eating baby food as an infant. Didn't last for long though. After about a month of when we started baby food he started refusing the vegies. He did eat lots of fruit though so our ped said if vegies were the only thing he wouldn't eat but was eating lots of fruit and taking a multi we shouldn't worry too much. About a year ago he became even more picky and stopped eating lots of things that he used to really like, fruit too...not completely but maybe like a banana once a week and that is it. Like your daughter he is super tiny...you can see his ribs, hip bones and his little shoulder blades stick out like wings. We were very concerned and took him to our doc. He checked him out and said he's totally healthy and to just not worry about it unless he looses a bunch of weight and stops eating altogether. We're at the point now where there are only a handful of foods that he will actually eat. He is so picky that all he has to do is not like the way a food LOOKS to not like it. If he doesn't like the way it looks he won't even try it. He's still very healthy though so we just make him what he likes and try not to worry too much. He takes a multi and we also give him Pediasure to make up for the things he is missing by not eating fruits and vegies. If you go the Pediasure route be sure not to let your daughter substitute it for food. We were giving our little guy Pediasure a couple of times a day and he started eating even less because he was replacing his food with the Pediasure. He loves Pediasure the way most kids like sweets (oh, did I mention he also doesn't like ice cream, cake, or other sweets??) so we give it to him like a desert after he's eaten some dinner. You might think about taking your daughter to see her ped...have her measured and weighed, check her BMI and see what percentile she's in, etc. You know, just make sure she is healthy and see if your ped has any suggestions. Also, if there are foods she really likes, make them for her...even if she's eating the same thing all the time. Best of luck to you with this....I know how difficult and scary it is when your child won't eat. Everyone is putting so much emphasis on obesity these days that people don't pay Blesings to you and yours, N.

Dear C. - Your daughter may be using this as a way of getting your attention. I don't know your story about her real father but, when children go through any type of situation where one or the other parent is not living with them they can use anything that pops in there head. You need to talk to her docter. A couple of things that might work is give her a supplemental drink, like assure or another trick, when it comes to vegetables is make them look fun. There are several good books at the library on "getting your children to eat vegetables. Good luck - Beky