Help with Neice and Nephew

I have a 9 year old son that has reading problems. Im not sure you going up to the school will do much. If you are worried about him start reading with him EVERY night. Kids are supposed to read for at least 25 minutes a day. Just reading to and with him everyday will help him out. It may seem like she is not doing anything but sometimes it is hard, she may not know what to do or she may have the same problem. It is also rough when you work nights. I did it for 3 years and my kids did suffer with their school work then.
Good luck.

I don't know how successful you will be going to the school - they have privacy issues and may not want to discuss problems with you because you are not the parent.
There are of course lots of things you can do with him while in your care- reading to him and having him read to you, workbook pages, computer skill drills, etc..

The communication issues going on between your sister and her son's school are honstly none of your business. The fact that your nephew is having difficulty reading is most certainly your business. I would suggest you stick with solving the problem by stepping in and helping your nephew develop his reading skills...You do have him offten. The effect of overstepping your bounds with family offten ends up overshadowing your original intent. If all you want to do is help then just help him learn to read. I taught my Kindergartener to reade using "EyeQ" by Infinite Mind. Whatever you choose to do, don't make the mistake of assuming he has a reading disability. School systems are all too willing to diagnose children with learning disabilities because the school gets more grant money for each "LD" student. I was labled "LD" and I, along with many others would agree this is not the best rout.

I would recommend that you offer to go with your sister to speak to his teacher. That way she will be aware that you care about your nephew and would like to help. Since you both provide care for your nephew, it would be nice that you both be present to speak to his teacher. I wouldn't push it on her and tell her that she "should" or "needs to" do this or that. Just express to her like you already have to us that you care alot about your nephew and want to see him succeed. Just remember to try not to place judgment and blame on anyone because doing so will not help your nephew any. Hope you can work it out!

by all means step up and speak to the school. Add reading to him and with him for 20 minutes a night to your nightly routine with him and all of the kids. If you think it's appropriate, then start him with picture books. While you're bathing the littlest one at night, put him on the computer at Starfall.com to help him work on his phonics and stuff. But the gadgets and stuff you can provide for him will NEVER replace actually reading to him each night.

My sister used to have a drinking problem and instead of her boys being put into the "system" since I was 17 and have my own place for over a year the judge upon my request gave them to me 8 and 10 year old boys.

I am sure if you introduce yourseld to the principal and teachers they will understand 100%. Teachers would have a better understanding of the situation with the boy and ways to help. Principals I have learned in the past are not so great as that as the youngest was dyslexic and nothing was done about it til I got them. SO I fully understand what you are going through. When mom came back after a year I still had them at night like you as well until I left for college at 19 making sure she'd take good care of them and they were ok having mom back. I also had found them a sitter I trusted too.

But talk to the teachers. I know they weill suggest reading to him, flash cards, and board games that require reading. The board games are easy to make right at home. If you need help on that let me know and I can help. I went to college for that reason but married an airforce man (well he was in college too then) and moved away and just never in one place long enough to finish.

Also find out what he likes. It is very important to play up his intrests when working with reading as it helps them want to read. See if you can take him to find books at what his lvl should be and if it is really bad a lvl below or so to start with and have him read to you b4 bed or while you are cooking or whatever if you are busy. It don't have to be long periods of time even 10 or 15 mins a day will help alot.
Bren

It sounds like your sister is blessed to have you in her life, as I am sure she is overwhelmed with working such rough hours and having a family to raise. I would suggest speaking with her first. I am sure your help would be appreciated as long as it doesn't look like interfering, and doing anything behind her back would appear that way. It might be a good idea to urge him to read more when he is with you, and analyze what is going on with him on your own. From there you and your children may be able to offer the tutoring that he may need. Sometime a child just a little older to help can be more effective than an adult adressing his problems. Maybe getting the kids to read a series that they all like toghether and out loud could be fun and very productive for him. Just teaching a young man to enjoy reading is half the battle!

If I were you I would explain to my sister how serious this could get. And I would take the liberty of talking with his teachers. Tell your sister that you doing it because you love him and that you are concerned about his education.
I understand that being a single mom is very difficult. She has her hands full. You are doing a great thing for your sister.

R. I think I would go and introduce myself to the new principal and let him/her know your situation and ask him/her for suggestions on what you should do to help. I know at my son's school the principal is very understanding of single parents and wants to do anything and everything possible to help the child and I would hope that all principals are the same way.

R.,I say try it if you have done it before,just explain the situation.You may also want to see about an IEP for your nephew that will show his problem areas so the school and you can help him more.You have to request an IEP to be done.Also try to talk to your sister if you can. Good Luck

Hi R., I would say yes. You need to call the school and let the new principal know the situation, and see when you can make an appointment to meet the principal and teacher, face to face so that you can come up with some plan that is in the best interest of the nephew. You can let your sister know what you are doing, to help her son, since she is so busy during the week. Holding a child back should only be a last resort, wehn all other options have failed. Good luck, S.

Wow, sounds like a busy household. I have a few ideas before you approach school administrators about his reading issues. Maybe you should ask the nephew what his views are on reading and if he finds it difficult to comprehend lessons in class or if he is shy about asking questions, or maybe he just hates reading. Sometimes someone other than mom and dad can convince a withdrawal or struggling reader that reading is fun. A nightly reading time may be a good idea. Maybe a trip to the library so he can pick out books that interest him. Sometimes school books are boring and redundant. My son, who will be eight in a few weeks, likes reading about dragons and the earth. WHO KNEW!! lol. I am a firm believer in a nightly reading routine and family sharing stories. I think some kids are writers rather than readers. Maybe he should keep a journal. The journal will help him spell words which, in turn, forms letters together for reading. :-)
I think that if you are at the end of your rope and the nephew has no problem with you approaching the teacher, then maybe you and your sister could go talk with them and ask what can help. The important thing is to stress that reading is fun and not a chore or duty. Reading for enlightenment is one of the best gifts we can teach children.

Hi R.,
If you have spoken with the teachers/school before then I assume your sister has given you permission to do so. If I were in your shoes I would let her know that you would like to do that again so that you can help them. See what she says. Yes, ideally she would go with you but she is probably going to miss sleep to go. Have you thought about the possibility of her staying with you to help her out more? I don't know if that is a possibility but I have been a single mom and it is damn hard to try to make ends meet. If she is working that shift I know she is not working at a high paying job.
If there is a new principal then I would definitely recommend that you go in. Like other people have said here, I would recommend testing to see if he has any needs that the school has overlooked as to why he is struggling and also see what all they are doing to help the situation.
He is very lucky to have an aunt like you....lots of parents unfortunately just don't care about school or school work. He is lucky that you do! If you wanted to you could start an incentive program. It is kind of a lot to ask a kid to work real hard when mom doesn't really care about it. So you may be that special adult to make a big deal when he does a good job and at the same time role model to your sister in how you can encourage children.
I also wonder if there is anything else going on with your sister? You didn't mention if she is older or younger or how old she is so I am not sure if maturity is an issue.
The best thing I can suggest with her is to look at her situation and see how you can help ease the stress on the financial situation. Is there a better place for her to be where she could share rent or something? I know for me working FT and then still barely scraping by and not being able to be there for the kids was really hard and stressful. I am not single anymore but it is really overwhelming and scarey when you are alone in it. There are food programs and other things if she qualifies.
Best to you,
L.

It sounds like your sister is just like mine. I would discuss it with your sister first. See if she wants you to get involved, if she anything like mine she just doesn't want to be the one to deal with it.

Good Luck
D.

If you are helping her with her kids and helping them with there school work it is always good for you to know whats going on so you can work more with him on his reading. I would go to the school and make her go with you to let the new Principal know that you are helping take care of your sisters kids while she works and that you would like to know as well as her what is going on with the kids so that you can help them with what ever they need help with. So that nothing like this happens again and he doesn't get left back.

T. P