Help with Potty Training - Livingston,NJ

this is going to sound really odd but i bribed my son to go on the potty. he loves money, so we bought a piggy bank for the bathroom and everytime he made pee he got .25 and if he pooped he got $1.00. now he love buying hotwheels with his own money. you just have to take what she loves and use it againt her. Good Luck!

Hi Jenn well I also have a 3 year old daughter and she would not use the potty she would pee in her pants and then ask to be changed. What ended up getting her to use the potty was telling her to push water in to her potty because she did not understand when we would tell her to go pee in the potty and we would give her a couple of m&ms after she went she ended up being completely trained in less then 2 weeks. Well I hope maybe this might help you.

My daughter will be 3 next month & I had a really hard time getting her to start going on the potty also. I did a sticker chart for her & let her pick out stickers at the store to put on the chart each time she went on the potty. I also purchased a few small toys as a "special treat" when she had 5 stickers on her chart. I would suggest just putting her in underwear instead of a pullup (let her pick out the underwear at the store too) My daughter was always excited about wearing underwear because she could chose every day which underwear she wore that day. It seemed to help when she was around other kids her age & saw that they went on the potty. So if you have any friends who have kids around her age maybe you could have them over. When my daughter saw that her friends were going on the potty then she would always want to.
Good Luck!

Hi J.,
I am not saying this because I am proud of it but my older daughter was almost 4 before she was 100% potty trained. She did not care being in a dirty pull-up. It was horrible for me to have to change an almost 4 year old pull-up. I am a stay at home mom also...She just all of a sudden was like "I am ready". She was fine from that moment on. I don't know why it took so long but I guess it can. Now on the other hand, I have another daughter who decided right before her 2nd birthday she wanted to use the potty. So I had 1 early and 1 late at potty trained.I know what you are going through..I tried a lot of different things...one thing that helped was when we gave her stickers for her to put on her potty chair once she used it. I tried to tell her I would give her gifts but that didn't work. The stickers helped...I just say, hold on----it will happen.. Good luck... Take care, Jen

Hi Jen,
My daughter Breanna just turned 3 this month and I to struggle with it alittle but I have had some success with a potty paper...it is just a poster board that we colored on and I wrote "Breanna's potty paper" I bought some stickers and lolly pops. each time she goes to the potty she gets to pick out a sticker and put it on the potty paper, this seems to work I find her going in alot saying I gotta go potty Mommy. The lolly pops are a special treat too when she goes potty..I have done this with all my kids and it seems to work for me. (I have 4 kids, Jessica~12, Kyle~11, Brittney~7 and Breanna~3) I hope this works for you.let me know. ____@____.com

Actually putting her in underwear and taking the pull-ups away, is the best way to go, Both my Sons were potty trained at 2 1/2 years, I had made the mistake of buying the pull-ups for my oldest son, but it just postponed the process, Once I started putting them in the underwear, It made them realize that they were wet, and it was unconfortable, so normally they would be like "UH OH Potty" and run to the potty, Even if i was upset, I felt that putting them on the potty after an accident, was just showing them where they needed to go. Yes it can make a mess and it is alot of extra wash, But it moved the process along alot sooner, they started picking up on it on their own, I think it was only a Month or Two and they were completely Potty trained.
My Daughter is Going to be two in March and We just bought her, Her First New Undies, Probably like 12 to 16 pair but, I don't have an excuse to put her back into the diapers around the house, and if she has an accident the first place she runs is to the potty and she's already got there in time a couple times.
My Cheat is Shirt and Underwear, I don't put the pants on her. It easier for her to do it her self. That What she likes.

The Reward Stickers or a Sticker chart Worked too, I don't think you can over due the Good job and the cheering, they like to know you are proud of them, and that they made you very happy, cause they do want to please you.

They Normally like the Idea of BIG KID underwear. And if they get to pick it out that may give them more reason not to pee on the undies.

A three year old, that doesn't want a diaper because it pinched, I would defenetly take the Pull-ups away, Maybe buy a bag of diapers to go with the underwear, She will make her own decision. I think she'll go for the Underwear. Because the diapers are unconfortable, just like wet underwear.
And do the one thing most parents do not think of, Ask her if she will Please use the potty like a big Girl, and if she says No, ask why not. You may get something from her.

Hi J.~ My daughter was almost 4 before she was completely potty trained (I am not proud of that fact either). (i hope it is easier when we train my son lol) We tried everything. One day I got a bright idea after my mother in law bought her a bag of junk from the dollar store that i did not want to give her (just more stuff to pick up). She wanted the stuff and the bag became the "treat bag" . Everytime she went on the potty she got to pick one treat from the bag. There was no food in the bag, just various little toys. And every time she got to go in the bag to get something, she got to see what else was in there and I think it motivated her to keep trying to get all the stuff in the bag. She sought a reward from the bag for two weeks and then she stopped looking for treats but kept going to the potty. You are not a horrible mom, I found this aspect of parenting to be very challenging. Good luck! L.

Hi J.,
I'm just beginning to potty train my (almost) 2 year old. I heard of the rewards system. I think I'm going to try that. My sister used to give my niece mini M&M's when she went on the potty. I like the piggy bank idea that one person posted, but that would only work if your child knows the concept of money. My daughter likes goldfish crackers, so I'm thinking I may use that. Of course it's easier to not have to reward because then I fear she may expect something. Also, is your daughter afraid of the potty? Mine was - so I brought her in the bathroom with me and let her flush the toilet so she could get used to the sounds. You could also even try placing something in the potty that she could aim for - like marbles or something like that. Maybe make a game out of it and say "let's see if you can go pee on the marbles", for example. Hope this helps.
Good luck!
M.

I have 2 boys. My oldest is 4 and he just got potty trained. I had to completely take away the diapers and pull-up and just put him in underwear. Yeah, its more messes to clean up, but he picked it up in about 2 weeks, now he is completely potty trained. I dont know if this will help, but wanted to respond.

Have you tried to put her in a underwear? Try putting her in a regular underwear and take her everytime you go. If she sees you sitting on the potty then she will understand that that is where you are supposed to go to the bathroom now. Let her she you on the potty and sit even until she goes. I would try every hour and 10 minutes after she has had something to drink. I know it will be hard at first but she will get the concept. I hope that this works for you.

Jenn I know your pain! When my daughter, who is now 5 1/2, began we actually were pushing her toooo hard. Then what I ended up doing was this: Let her watch me on the potty and let her get the toilet paper for me and flush for me, then we cheered! after a few days of that I asked if she wanted to try, we then sat her on the potty and after she did FINALLY go we had a celebration...cheering, jumping up and down, clapping a reward sticker chart and washing the hands by her self. These steps helped her and made her successful. I felt like an idiot, but it got the job done. Kids LOVE stickers, so if you can start with that with a "special" calendar she picks out she just may give it a good ole' try! Good luck!

Jenn,

First, avoid anyone who will tell you that you are a bad mother because your child isn't potty trained. Anyone who would say that to you doesn't have good intentions toward you or your daughter. I mean honestly! Why can't people just mind their own business? I'll tell you what, my daughter was over 3 before I even thought about potty training. What we did wasn't the typical "potty training" that you read about in parenting books, but it worked for us and for another little girl that I watch during the day who is the same age.

First, stop all of the following: telling her to use the potty, chasing her around saying "do you need to use the potty", the exessive praise after a success, any negative comments after a failure (this includes questions like "Why didn't you use the potty?) deciding for her what she will put on her bottom in the morning, and stop moving her potty chair around.

She's 3, she knows her bodily functions and she knows when she needs to go. Really, it's her choice to decide where she is going to pee. You can't make her pee on the potty and she knows that. I'm thinking you've got the mother of power struggles on your hands. So, I'm thinking that after you stop doing the things I talked about above, you should start doing other things to replace those behaviors.
When she goes pee/poop either on the floor, in her pants, in the bathtub, in a pull up stay calm. Do not let yourself elevate! Say to her in a nice, friendly way (as you help her change her cloths and clean herself up) "Someday, you'll put all your pee and poop in the potty" You could also add "Just like mommy/daddy/sissy" or whoever. Say this too her every time she has an accident. If she attempts the potty (on her own, not being coerced by you) but misses say the same thing "It's ok. Someday, you'll put all your pee and poop in the potty..."
If you notice her doing the pee-pee dance ignore it. Let her decide to go to the potty on her own. You'll have to change lots of cloths at first, but eventually she'll notice that you aren't going to bother her about it and she'll relax. Once she trusts that it really is her decision she will start to use the potty consistantly. If you are also having the pull up or undies struggle in the mornings (she wants undies and you tell her not until she uses the potty) just let her decide whether or not she will wear pull ups or undies. Letting her make this decision for herself will give her so much control and she'll love that! You may end up changing lots of cloths, but eventually, she'll decide that it's easier for her to use the potty or just wear pull ups. (Hopefully the former!) Do not over praise her accomplishments...let her be proud of it herself! Let her own it...after all she's the one that did it! You don't need to bribe kids with toys and stickers to get them to use the potty. When she does well a simple smile and a "You did it!" will be fine (Avoid "good girl", "Good job" and "I'm so proud of you!"). It lets her know that you are happy about what she did, but doesn't lead her to believe that she has to do it to make you happy.

I could go on and on about this. You can e-mail me if you want for clarification on any part of this. It really works (although I understand that it's not for everone...)

Good luck with whatever you chose!

good luck. my son just turned 4 & he still refuses to use the potty. we've tried it all. I'm hoping this summer I can keep him naked & try that one again. He goes occasionally, but not all the time.

I have 3yr olds at my DayCare and Potty Training is not easy especially when you have 24 kids in your classroom but i have found that the easiest method is rewards. We use stickers as encouragement but you can use anything. Little toys or coloring books, whatever your daughter is into at the time! I think potty training at home is harder than a child in daycare because the other children see eachother go into the potty and they want to do it too. Good Luck and i hope it works out for you!

go in with her use the big potty while she uses the little one. make it a game.

Hi J...

I felt your pain. My daughter turned 3 in January and I have a 5 month old daughter as well. I was pulling my hair out, and when my friend's children who were younger were starting to potty train and showed more interest, it really made me feel like a bad parent...but we aren't.

I was told not to push the issue cause she would only regress with the baby being born and moving. I finally told her the reason why she doesn't see her friends that often(really the winter weather) is because they are potty trained and they go to school...don't you want to go to school like them. That kinda clicked as well as the Once Upon A Potty Book for her. She is going to go to preschool in the September.

It took a very long time, I probably could have pushed it more but I was a believer that she will get it when she does, and now she has been potty trained for almost 2 weeks now, doing VERY well. We have even ventured out to Long Island in panties..lol. One day it just all kinda clicked like some of my friends said it would.

Good luck girl, you are an AWESOME mother, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Hi Jenn,
Not so sure how gentle you want to be but I have two different stories since both my boys LOVED their binkys too.
With my oldest one he was almost 3 and for awhile we had been feeding squirrels and they had baby ones we fed too. Well I told him that the mama needed his binky for her baby and he willingly put it by the tree for the mom to take. Went smoothly.
Now my second who just turned two on the 7th. We took his on New Year's weekend. I just cut the tip of it off and when he asked for it to go to bed I let him go get it and he was like "UhOh Ma ma"! And he wanted nothing to do with it since it was broken. He slept fine that night woke up a couple of times but no biggie. And he asked for it after that I would just give him the cut one and tell him it was broken. It is still in his room now and it doesnt seem to bother him that he doesnt have it and he wasnt stressed out about it.
Not so sure if my stories will help but good luck!!!

S. =)