Help with Thumb Sucking!

Updated on June 04, 2007
M.D. asks from Crowley, TX
11 answers

Well, the time has come for my almost six year old to stop sucking her thumb. The dentist said now is the time to break the habit. HOW??? We have a thumb guard but she hates it- (obviously). My question is do I wait until she is ready or do I just make the decision and force her to stop? I feel so bad for her because even when we just talk about it she cries! I made a chart and we talked about rewards- she was ready to start today. Well guess what? When I got it out she threw a fit. (Yes- we have tried the nasty tasting stuff- she sucked right through it)
She only does it during lazy times- resting, tv, or the car. She really never does it in public. I dont want to have an ongoing battle with her all day. Do I start with the daytime and let her suck her thumb at night, then move on to night time? Please share any experiences you have had with this. I need to be well prepared because baby sister sucks her thumb too! Thanks moms.

2 moms found this helpful

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A.T.

answers from Little Rock on

My mom tried everything with me but nothing worked. I quit on my own when I was 6. Just one night threw my doll away and never sucked my thumb again.

My best friend has started stopping with her little girl and has started with the day time first. :) Good luck.

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M.F.

answers from Dallas on

We're heading down this road with my 4 yr old. We've set a rule that "thumbs and blankets stay in her bedroom." I've read several books that recommend starting by limiting where the thumb-sucking happens. It has worked for us. If she's in the living room, etc. and I catch her with the thumb, I remind her of the rule. She will either take it out of her mouth or go to her room for a few minutes. I swear it's like a smoker needing to take a cigarette break! She'll duck away to her room in the middle of playing just for a minute or two with her thumb and blanket!!

Added:
I just found a "done with thumbs" calendar on the Chuck E. Cheese website when I was printing out coupons. It's a 2-week chart. When the kid fills the chart, she can turn it in at Chuck E Cheese for 10 free tokens. We're going to use the chart to stop thumb-sucking in the car (the only place we've let her have the thumb outside of her bedroom). I'm thinking we'll print out multiple calendars and work on thumbs at nap/rest time, then at night.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Dallas on

Hi! I understand the frustration of thumb sucking. My 8 (almost 9) year old daughter sucks her thumb. Now it's only at bedtime and usually only for about 10 minutes tops. She won't suck her thumb unless she has her "lovie". I have tried all of the "tips" to get her to stop and none of them worked. Her doc finally said, "she will stop when she stops". What a load off of my mind.
Rest assured, she will stop when the time is right for HER.

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T.L.

answers from Dallas on

OK, here is my story. My DD is now almost 5 and we started making her think about stopping when she was almost 4. I must say that she only did it when she was snuggling on the couch/bed with her blankie. She was known in her daycare as 'Linus' because she was ALWAYS with her blankie...yet that was the only way she would suck her thumb. I figured it would be easy to just take the blankie away, and the thumb would follow. NOT. We had to resort to a reward system that I knew would get her attention. Maybe your daughter can relate....my daughter LOVES having me do a pedicure on her piggies! She had always been wanting me to paint her fingers but I said I wouldn't until she stopped sucking her thumb. So months before her 4th birthday, I bought her a new blanket (Tinkerbell) that only stayed in her room and we also picked out all kinds of nail polishes and decals for her fingers. By her birthday she couldn't wait to kick the habit and finally paint her fingers like a big girl. We did the manicure and although she has had a few sneaky thumb moments, she's been a former thumb sucker for a year!!! :)
I never had to use the thumb guard or put the bitter stuff on her fingers. Here is a tip though, they make little armbands with velcro...similar to a knee brace. You attach them to their arms, in the middle of the elbows and they can NOT bend their arms for anything. The hospital gave them to me when my DD had eye surgery so she wouldn't rub/touch her eyes. That was a nightmare because she couldn't snuggle with her blankie OR suck her thumb and I really felt bad for her because the poor kid just had surgery and she couldn't soothe herself the way she was used to. But, it worked. Tough love, but it's just a thought. Good luck.

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L.

answers from Dallas on

If she only does it at home and during quiet times, I wouldn't worry about it. I did it on occassion into my teen years when I was under stress or anxious about something and I couldn't get to sleep. Some times I even think about doing it now! If you see her doing it outside of her room just say 'Thumb' to remind her to remove it. Don't forcefully take it away but set up guide lines where she can do it, like at bedtime and in her room. She'll eventually wean herself. This is her way to soothe and comfort herself and when she doesn't need it then she'll stop. Good luck, it's hard.

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A.W.

answers from Knoxville on

You can certainly try all the methods and ideas below to stop the thumbsucking, but -- as a former thumbsucker myself -- they're only going to work to a degree. I woke up either sucking my thumb or waking to find marks from my teeth while my thumb was in my mouth while sleeping for years. I know that dentists and orthodontists shriek about thumbs and pacifiers, etc., but I don't think there's a big, big deal if your child sucks only at bedtime. My son was a paci user, and we stopped him when he was 4 (it was very traumatic for him) because his dr. was concerned about his mouth formation, even though he only had his paci at night. His mouth is perfectly fine, absolutely no abnormalities at all. Is it because he stopped at 4? Not likely, because the dr. gave us all kinds of horror stories about what's already happened to his mouth as a result of using the paci that long.
I would say that at 5 she is old enough to understand that it could affect her teeth/mouth, so she needs to cut back on the thumb, and she is also old enough to understand that kids her age usually don't suck their thumbs. If you work on those two things with her, and remind her gently if she's sucking her thumb during waking hours, you'll likely get her to cut back to sleeping time which, in my own experience, you'll have little to no control over whether she sucks her thumb while sleeping or not (and neither will she).

Good luck!

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A.O.

answers from Dallas on

We started with the day time as well. We did things very gradually -- no more sucking the thumb in the car, no more sucking the thumb during tv. Once we conquered those battles, we moved on to stopping sucking the thumb while sleeping. While I put some pressure on her to stop during the day (constant reminders, rewards for no thumb-sucking), we decided not to put that much pressure on her at night. I would remind her every night, tell her why it's important to stop, and then go. It took a couple of months, but she finally stopped sucking her thumb at night shortly before she turned 5. Her bottom teeth becoming loose helped, too. I think they made sucking her thumb a little painful.

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I.

answers from Dallas on

We forced our oldest to stop when he turned 4. We told him at 3 1/3 that he had to stop sucking his thumb in the car seat, he was only alowed in bed. That was a battle... We also told him that when he would turn 4 he should stop totally. So we prepaired him a long way before. But it was a battle. Reminding him every time. And checking when he was in bed a lot of times! We used the nasty tasting stuff as a reminder. He wanted to stop, to be a big boy, but it was a long way to go. He's now 5 1/2 and every now and than when I tuck him in before I go to bed I find him with a thumb in his mouth...

Good luck, it will take time... You have to be very very consequent.

I.

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S.E.

answers from Dallas on

well the thumb is hard to break from but what i did is slowly winged him off. day time then night time. i put some pepper juice on it when he started to suck his thumb he didnt like it but it got him to stop. with the 17 month old you may try a passifier instead of the thumb. it is a lot easier to break than the thumb and does the same amount of damage to their mouth if not less.my son is 2 years old and the pass was the eisest thing to get him off of. (in one night)! he didnt ask for it didnt even think about it. yes it could have been luck but he never got the pass all the time from the day he was born. he only got it when he sleept. not even in car rides did he have it. so i guess you have to start them when they are born on winging them off.

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L.

answers from Dallas on

My almost 4-yr old has gradually stopped sucking her thumb for a few months now. I do catch her sometimes at night or when she is about to wake up, but she seems to get embarassed when she gets caught. I would recommend starting with the daytime and give her positive recognition for any duration of time in which she is not sucking her thumb. I know it sounds basic, but highlighting how great she is doing throughout the day seems to be working for our daughter. We also tell her how great her thumb is looking these days. She also has an almost 2 year old baby sister who sucks her thumb!

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T.C.

answers from Dallas on

It's true that some children who suck their thumb may not end up appearing to have dental/skeletal problems, but I've seen many who have needed major orthodontic and/or surgical intervention to correct problems that were caused by long-term, agressive thumbsucking. Here is a case example of what can happen when thumbsucking is not stopped before the permanent teeth start coming in (keep in mind the first picture is of the child's natural bite with the back teeth closed together):

http://www.cumc.columbia.edu/news/dental/cdr97/mehrnia.html

M., my heart goes out to you and your daughter! I know that thumbsucking can be a very hard habit for a little one to break! As a dentist, I wouldn't recommend waiting until she's ready to stop on her own since she's already almost six years-old. However, I would certainly try various positive reinforcement methods (like the chart you mentioned)...you may get lucky and find one that will work with your daughter. Don't get discouraged because she got upset when you showed her the reward/goal chart...try, try again! I think it will be easier to make very small goals---just as you said---such as trying to break the habit first during T.V. viewing, then maybe move onto travel time, then save the night time for the last goal.

Here are two informative sites you may find helpful:

http://www.ada.org/public/topics/thumbsucking.asp

http://www.aapd.org/media/pressreleases/ace-99.asp

I wish you and your daughter the best of luck!!!

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