Help...My Daughter's Body Is Changing

Hi! There's a great books by American Girl that are so helpful for the little girls. I got my daughters The Care & Keeping Of You: THe Body Book for Girls. It's a wonderful start about discussing the changes in their bodies. American Girl has a lot of wonderful books geared for girls and changing and growing up. Hope this helps!
Nan

talk talk talk! and yes the American Girl book is awesome! Buy it now! It's a good way to bring up the topic. I have a 9 yo as well- I bought it for her and it was very helpful.

Definitely pick up a book for her, I recommend that American Girl book (I'm not a fan of the dolls, but this book is really good) for her and an all-encompassing book for you. I picked up a really good one at Borders it's called Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know About Sex (but were afraid they'd ask) by Justin Richardson. I wish I'd had it earlier like when they were Babies!
In addition be as open and honest as you can and remember not to make it scary or give her any indication that you don't like it or that you have pain or discomfort. One thing I learned was to have the talks a little at a time and be casual. If she gets cranky or says she doesn't want to talk about it anymore that's fine. Say something like, sure, we can talk more later, I know this is a lot to understand, etc.
Good luck, but you'll do great!

I took my girls now 18 and 16 to dinner at a nice resturant. We talked like grown ups about everything that was going to happen to her body. I give them each a book about development that I got at Barnes and Noble. Most bookstores have many to choose from. Take your time buying it make sure it tells her what you want her to know. My girls still talk about our special dinner.

Definitely talk to her. I started my period when I was 10 and was developing as well. I had absolutely no clue what it was or what was going on for months. I did not have much for periods then, and was just using bunched up kleenexes in my underwear! LOL I only got help from my mom when she discovered some blood on the toilet tissue in the toilet when I forgot to flush. This was back in the 1970's in a small rural area, so I did not have any education with this and none of my friends were developing like me and had never had a period. Talk to her - you will both be glad you did.

It's amazing in school that they talk about drugs and the D.A.R.E. program - at a 6 year old level! It's not too early to talk to her at all. I started the talk with simple conversation like - "it may be time to pick out deodorants because your body is changing and gym is a time when you need to smell fresher". Hygiene is a good place to start. Starting with "panty liner pads" and discharges that women have can certainly spawn a topic (eventually). Keeping "supplies" handy and having her know where they are ...leads into what they are for. Are you seeing any kind of acne or changes in her skin? Ask her if she has noticed any changes in her body....bring up the conversation innocently but matter-of-factly. She'll detect your discomfort if you are...the harder questions are years away (and they DO get harder!) Just keep your answers simple and be prepared for ANY moment when she throws a question at you. My daughter is 13 now and she is good for the bedtime question, when we are alone so...maybe that might be your daughter's comfort zone too. It's good you're asking the question. My son usually catches me when we are driving. Definitely different than when I was a kid! I use correct anatomical terms when they ask for advise and we are private. If we are together as a family and it's a casual setting, and a comment arises....we sometimes throw out a slang term. Best of luck!

I bought my nine year old a book from American Girl called (I believe) The Care and Keeping of Me. You can get it at the library or almost any store that sells books including Target and Borders. It is a very concise and gentle book explaining almost everything a little girl needs to know. We have turned to that book about a zillion things, including becoming a woman.

I have a number of friends with girls 8 and older...quite a few of them already had their periods at 9 and 10...and if her body is changing I'd definitely talk about it with her pretty soon...I'm sure there are lots of great books....my DD is only 5 but she asks questions in her own 5 year old way...why aren't her boobies big like mommy's (I'm not that big but to her well...)I've tried to explain very simply about changing bodies etc...I've always heard it's best to be honest, use the anatomical terms, although often families will already have names for certain body parts, my only recollection of the talk with my mom is....well I can't remember it but I remember reading "Are you there God, it's me Margaret"...yikes that was so long ago..and I'm not saying that's the book to use...I'll check out that American Girl book next time I'm in the bookstore though...there's got to be lots of great resources.

What a fun and exciting time for mother and daughter...you're entering uncharted waters.....

B.

you should talk to your daugher. iam 7 i will be 8 on the 28. there is a book about the body by american girl.

Never too early. I started talking to my daughter at 9 and I am so glad. Each child is different and I think it helped her, being earlier, to be comfortable with things and even better knowing what to expect. My daughter also felt better asking questions knowing that I wasn't hesitant about talking to her and being there. She may yuck and ooh a lot, but good to prepare hour yourself than for her to get info somewhere else. There are some great books out there too that can help. God Bless!

B., from the other side of the equation. My mom talked to me when I was 9 and we read through a book. It was great, I was so appreciative to know what was going on, exactly, and not be scared. It made me confident. Although, I was a very late bloomer.
It sounds like we all agree - sit down with her :)

I am in the same position as you. My daughter has started growing up, and I wanted a book that was helpful to her. I found one at the American Girl website. It is called 'the Care and Keeping of You'. It talks about hygiene, body changes, feelings, and such. As it says, it is a head to toe book. When I first got it for her, there were some things we glossed over, but now that she is a couple of years older (12 yrs old), we are going back and talking about the physical changes more. It is also a book she can look at by herself, so if she is self conscious at first, she can learn privately. Then hopefully she will start questioning you. I have realized if I stay relaxed about the situation, the more approachable I am. I am also honest with her when I tell her things, and I let her know if the question is just not appropriate at this time for her age. I am learning that in helping her, she will stay confident and secure with herself. Good Luck!

Rush Copely in Aurora has a program called "From Girl to Young Woman." It is taught by a nurse and explains what is happening and what will happen. They do not get into sex or where babies come from. Just what is happening to the girls body through puberty. You can find out more information on their website www.rushcopley.com.

Hi B.~
If you are noticing that her body is changing, so is she. Definitely talk to her so she understands why. My daughter is 11 and I still can't believe I'm talking with my "baby" about these things, but she is very comfortable with the changes that are taking place because she understands what it's all about.

One of the other moms mentioned an Usborne book called What's Happening to Me? This is a great book that covers everything from basic hygiene through the body changes and on to the rest of what your daughter will need to know. It's a great book to go through section by section as she grows older and is ready for more information. You can view this book at www.GetUsborneBooksNow.com. Enter "What's Happening to Me for Girls" in the search box.

We've also used the American Girl book that's been recommended. These 2 books are great to use together.

Hope that helps!
K.

No, it's not too early to talk to your daughter. It appears to me that the youth of today are developing sooner than the youth of 40 years ago. My daughter is 8 and I have had her wear training bras when needed for the past year, whereas when I was 12 I finally was in a training bra.

C. T.

My daughter is also turning nine and I was just thinking it was time for me to have the conversation as well. I am going to go the route of getting a book and reading it with her. I know American Girl makes one and I am going to check out book stores for other options. I thought I should wait for her to start asking questions, but this has not happened and I am worried that her body will start to change soon and she will be scared. So I think we are going to have a mother daughter day and discuss this. Good luck, I can't believe this day has come! They grow up so fast!

YES!!!! You should talk to your daughter about her body changing. Not only that, and this sounds really really scary but it's a reality, you should be talking to your daughter about sex. Not just the traditional sex talk but also about touching and oral sex because kids her age and younger are participating in oral sex because they don't see that as sex. I have seen 12 yr olds in the schools and other places pregnant and they never once were talked to about sex. This should happen soon because kids as early as 8 and 9 are starting to have sex. I'm sorry if this scares you but it's true.

My body was changing at about that time also. Just explain it best you can because at this point she will still be a little girl who might just be excited but not real hormonal. I remember being excited (oh don't laugh) I got my period. So I stood on my head. That's how a nine year old might act. It was just like having another birthday. Silly but part of life.

Hi B.,
I would definitely not wait. My mom got her period at age 10 and 9 is not out of the range of possibility. That would be very scary to have happen and not know what it is. My mom always used books to explain things to us with lots of non-threatening, straightforward illustrations. Those helped a lot for us.
Good luck!
Mary-Claire

I used to be an Usborne distributor and they had two books that I loved. One was for early on called "What's Happening to Me"--there's a version for boys and one for girls. The other one is "Growing Up"--this book is much more detailed and for the older child. I suggest reading the book first, then reading it with her. You want to make it as comfortable as possible it, so that if she has questions, she's willing to ask you. If you say 'hey read this and let me know what you think', it makes the topic seem taboo or she may be too embarassed to come to you. If you talk to her mater of fact, engage her and tell her funny stories about you when you were younger and misconceptions that you had, you will seem much more approachable.

Good luck!

Get information from her school or the library. They'll help you honey.

Talk to her NOW. The sooner the better. You may be nervous about it... she's not. As a mother of three daughters, one son, ages 14-28 yrs.... They want to know. She will ask questions (good, that means she's comfortable with you) answer honstly, bluntly, and correctly. Good Luck! (It's not that bad)

Hi B.,
My daughter just turned 10 and we are going through the same thing. I had the talk and American girl has some great books.
So I would have the talk with your daughter, its not to early.

L.

My daughter is 10 and we had the same thing when she was about 8. The best thing was the American Girl book, I think it was called "me and my body" or something like that. You can find the book at the Bath and body store in the mall where they sell the American girl bath products or at any good book store. The book takes a very no nonsense approach in a way that is at the level that is easy for a 10 year old to understand. It also isn't scary how the material is presented. My daughter still reads the book monthly just to check. We also went bra shopping and tried all different styles and types to see what was comfortable for her. We set her up with an emergency pack just in case she would get her period at school or when I wasn't home and we talked about where I store all the necessary supplies. She did go through the "girl talk" at school last year in 4th grade and it didn't scare her like her friends because she already knew the majority of it. My daughter started developing so fast that she started shaving her underarms also when she was 9!!! The girls are developing earlier and earlier it seems and it is never too early to talk to her about what she will experience. My daughter said that she has 2 girls in her class that got their period when they were 8 and in 3rd grade!!!!

Good luck! I think that it is more scary and uncomfortable for us than for them but the more open that we can be the better prepared and stronger our daughters will be!

S.

American Girl has a great book called "The Care & Keeping of You".

The American Girl book is the best one I've seen...it is called: The Care & Keeping Of You: The Body Book For Girls,
by Valerie Schaefer. It is a great tool for discussions between you and your daughter and she can go back and reference it from time to time when she has questions. It also covers t hings like nutrition, feelings and hygiene.

http://www.americangirlpublishing.com/advice/bodyandmind/...

Hi B.,

I have an 11 year old & we bought her the American Girl book about your body when she was 8. I read it first and then gave it to her & looked over it together. She still looks through it maybe weekly. The book is good as it isn't overwhelming or over the top with details.

good luck

B.,

I have read through the American Girl book-The Care and Keeping of You with my now 10 yr old. We read through the whole thing a little at a time. We stopped and discussed any questions she might have. It was great to discuss this with her before she 'needed' it. She continues to ask questions, and knows it is okay since I opened the door of communication with this subject.

Good luck,
B.

There is a really good book you can read together or she can read on her own called "All About Me" by American Girl. It is very helpful in explaining.

No it's not to soon...my daughter started "changing" around 9 now she is 15. American Girl has a really good book out with nice diverse picturs and all designed for girl 9 to about 12. Good Luck!