Hormonal Changes After Having a Baby

Keep in mind everyone goes through some form of this at one time or another. It's part of being a great mom. No sleep definatley doesn't help. Hopefully things will work out. Good Luck.

Call your doctor. Went through something similar about the same time as you. I had a problem with my thyroid ( post-partuim thyroidosis) which can happen. If untreated you can develop post-partuim depression. Please do not let your doctor put you on depression drugs unless they check your thryroid first. If its borderline, insist that they treat it. After about week to ten days you will have better control. Good luck. Also are you too busy? Are you sleeping when the baby sleeps or cleaning the house. I had to stop being super-mom and sleep more.

Here's my response to a post about something very similar from about a month ago. Instead of typing it back out, I copied and pasted it for you. I hope it helps give you some positive assurance that it's natural to feel the way you're feeling, and also that it will get better and everything will actually turn out better than you'd ever expected!

Before I became pregnant with my first, I was a total party girl. I was the head bartender at Pieres and LOVED my life. All of a sudden, I found out I was pregnant. I dropped everything bad I was doing, including smoking and drinking, and went through quite a transition even B4 I became a mother. I realized that since I wasn't going to parties every weekend anymore, most all of my friends had moved on to people who were. That's one thing about a job and a lifestyle. You surround yourself with others that have a common interest, even if the common interest is just your work place. Once you step out of that, you find that 99% of your friends were really just acquaintances. THAT is the hard part. You all of a sudden are totally detached from the outside world. BUT the thing that makes or breaks you is whether you accept that, mourn it, and let it make you fall into a slump, or if you decide to embrace the new chapter of your life and find others who are experiencing the same things too. A great way is by joining a local MOPS group, a playgroup, sign your kids up for things at the YMCA during the day so you can meet other mothers while they're in class, pretty much anything that gets you out of the house and around other children and mothers. And if you have trouble talking to strangers, get over it because I've noticed that with mothers you usually have to strike up the conversations. Most of them are completely watching their kids and don't always even notice if you sit next to them! If you think that you'll be okay because there are certain activities around to take the kids to, you'll be disappointed. Even when there are 10 things to pick from everyday, if you are alone with the kids, you will begin to feel isolated. I joined a play group after falling into a slump of being a stay at home mom for almost 2 years. Until then, I had completely lost touch with myself. I didn't know who I was anymore since I wasn't a fun party girl I used to be who was always surrounded by tons of people and had her phone ring multiple times every hour. All of a sudden, the only thing on my agenda was changing diapers, feeding, and naptimes. I wish I would've been warned and given some specific things to do to avoid feeling like I was cut off from humanity. NOt only is it really bad for you, it's also bad for your husband, who all of a sudden has these high expectations he feels from you since he's suddenly the only adult you have constant contact with. So, get yourself motivated to do something for YOU, and get out of the house and have some fun. Look on Mommyandme.com, craigslist, and other search engines on the web and research play groups. There are TONS of them out there. I was nervous the first time I went to a playgroup, but I went with zero expectations, that way if I didn't feel comfortable, I would just not go back. Research MOPS at churches in the area. I was in a mops group for 3 years and LOVED it! Try to get a schedule for you and the kids to have. Don't fill it with stuff everyday, just maybe on Tuesdays and Thursdays at first. If you fill it everyday, then you'll never feel content just staying at home with the kids. Kids enjoy and need to stay at home in my opinion, rather than bustling around to different activities.

Anyway, hope this helped. It honestly took me the entire first 2 years of motherhood before I finally embraced it and started to enjoy my new life as a stay at home mother. I think it could've happened a lot sooner though if I had known what things I'd see happen. Losing those friends was really hard on me.

I, like you was also very snippy with my husband, and my poor kids didn't get that "love" that I see other mothers give their kids. Sure, they knew they were loved, and I DID love them, but I would get so frustrated all the time because I wasn't used to being interrupted constantly. I had lived by myself before I met my current husband and unexpectedly got pregnant. I LOVED my alone time and loved to sit and read in the quiet with candles burning for hours. Once I had my daughter, I realized that there was NO time for the things I loved so much! During naptimes, when some mothers say take that time for yourself...I was like "are you nuts??? I desperately NEED that time to do the dishes, vacuum, mop, things like that that I can't seem to get done with a baby!" Anyway, it does get better. The first thing I would do is try to learn to live in the moment. That book by Eckart Tolle that is on Oprah.com was a great read for me. I know it's impossible to get quality reading time, but even just 10 minutes a day would get you some great reading. If I were you, I would wait and not jump to any conclusions of post pardem. I had major emotional issues after my kids were born, but I truly think it's because of the transition of becoming a mother. I'm not saying that I don't "believe" in post pardem, but I think it's waaaaayyy overdiagnosed. It's hard being a mother, especially when the very first week of being a mother brings no sleep, a crying baby, getting pooped and peed on, being sore from delivery, pain pills from delivery, and cramps from your uterus going back to the normal size. I mean, who WOULDN'T be a total wreck!???? So, give yourself some time, you'll adjust, and when you do, you will LOVE this new chapter of your life, and be able to embrace it with your husband.

I am a first time mom to a 4 month old baby girl. I understand what you are going through completely, 100%!! I do the exact same things. I love my daughter whole-heartedly, but seem to be so mean to my husband. It's like I can't control when I snap at him or get frustrated with him. And it's not like he doesn't contribute around the house or help out with our daughter. I know I am so very lucky to have a husband like him because he works full-time and helps me out whenever he can at home. I honestly think it is the hormones still, and our children are not that old for us to have adjusted completely to life w/a baby! We had 9 months to get used to the idea of the baby, maybe we should give ourselves at least that much time to get adjusted. Everyday brings something different, just hang on and be patient! I'll try to do the same!

I am not sure how long it will take to get back to "normal" but I will tell you it can take a long time and things may never go back exactly as they were. At least it didn't for me. My youngest is about to turn 3 and I have not really been completly normal since having her well really since having my first she just turned 4 in Oct. I think your hormonal normal will never be as it was before and I think a lot of my trouble was due to that and then trying to get back on birth control. I just recently gave it (bc) up for good and I am starting to feel a lot better.

But on the other hand you are dealing with a lot of stress and its not like any stress you have ever dealt with before. More than likly your hubby is stressed too and you two are just clashing more than you have before. You need to be sure YOU get a break once a week if possible and you also need to be sure you and hubby get dates without baby every few weeks if not once a week. Just getting a break will help. And don't feel guilty about leaving baby for awhile (I always used to) because a refreshed mommy (and daddy) will do her a lot of good. Hang in there and remember to take care of YOU as well as baby.

Angie is spot-on with her response! I too was the full-time earner and now SAHM - but not because I don't want to be working, just can't find a job right now :( Anyway, my fuse is short with hubby because I have no adult conversations anymore either. When hubby gets home, discussion is usually about what bill needs paid now and NOT about anything that adults talk about during the course of a workday. I really miss that. Then he's worked hard all day and doesn't want our little one crawling on him or whatever, so it's more Kaitlin time for me. Truth be told, he hasn't changed her diaper since MARCH when I lost my job and he started working. (He was SAHD when I went back to work when she was 6 wks. old). It's not hormonal, and you're not going crazy. Good luck and get some more adult time in your day!

I guess I just wanted to say, I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. I am like that too, same thing not towards the baby just towards others. My hubby is like a child to me at times. I think woman are so different than men, they just don't get it. You have the hardest job in the world and I think most of them take that for granted. My son will be 1 in a month and I still don't feel like I use to. I think once you have a baby, you change as a person. I don't have alot of advice, just wanted you to know I understand. If you ever need to vent just personal msg me, we can get it our here...instead of on our hubbys.

Take care
T.

M.! LMFAO! ...and I don't mean to laugh but quite literally, I had this EXACT same conversation with my husband just last night. I was a full time worker. Had the baby and I am now a SAHM. I have always wanted to be a SAHM so I was thrilled we were actually able to afford it. I love my baby and have all the patience in the world for her (although, my baby is 15 months old. Not 5). Now my husband on the other hand... If the poor guy takes too long ordering a drink or picking out cereal I feel myself getting frustrated. "You know what you like to drink! Just order it!" It's other stuff too though. Not just petty stuff. Fact is, my wick has gone from pretty decent length to nothing in about a minute. What makes it worse is that my husband is a truck driver & works a long 3rd shift. So when he does get home from work he's wiped & needing to sleep.

So what we decided to try (literally just last night so I have no idea if it works or not) is for me to get more grown-up time. I realized my daily conversations consisted of "Emily, no. Emily, where's your nose? Emily, are you thirsty? Emily, what shape is this?" There wasn't enough adult interaction and I'm lonely. I'm used to people. So, when he gets home from work, he's going to make more of an effort to spend real quality time with me rather than just being here. That way I get more adult conversation and I don't go stir crazy. We're going to go out more. Even if it's just to Walmart or the mall to walk around. Keep in mind, I do have a car & everything during the day too. For me it's just not the same going out alone with the baby though. You are still 100% baby focused.

So anyhow, I guess I don't have a ton of wisdom. I have no idea how long it lasts. I'm sure everyone is different. I guess it depends on when you realize there's an issue. It took me 15 months so well done on figuring it out at only 5! But you are not alone. I TOTALLY understand what you're going through. I'm in the boat right there with you. So, good luck. Please, let me know if you come up with something that works. LOL! ...you always hear having a baby is wonderful but it can be really hard on a relationship. I mean, my hubby & I have been together for 11 years. Married for 5 1/2. We're a strong happy couple. But it's been hard on us adjusting to having Emily. I guess we just have to keep working at it... work work work! LOL!

Good luck M.... sorry for the novel I wrote here. The irony of timing just cracks me up... I had to share! LOL!

Nothing new to add. Just want to say I'm in the same boat. Love my hubby and my baby (14 mo today), but my hubby annoys the daylights out of me most of the time right now. I feel bad for him, nevertheless I have a really difficult time managing my frustrations with him.
The other night I blew up because he was chewing Twizzlers too noisily. I seriously had to leave the room because I thought I was going to explode. heheehe

Good luck and God bless.

Hi M.,
I too am a first-time mother of a five and a half month old and about a month ago my husband confronted me because I was being so negative towards him. After sitting down and talking to him, I realized that I think deep down I was a bit jealous that he had a career and life outside the home. It's not that I regret staying home - I love every minute of it, but I think I was a bit bitter that he had so much to connect with outside of me and the baby. I think I was also dealing with some self-esteem issues because I wanted to get my old body back and it wasn't happening as fast as I thought it would. I think because my son has more of a routine and takes longer naps I had time of my hands and I started to use it to feel bad about myself. So I got a membership to a rec where I can take the baby to walk on a track, I also started scrapbooking which is a hobby and love of mine. I have also started reading books that I always wanted to and I got a part-time job watching two school-age girls. This way I feel like I am accomplishing things throughout the week, helping out financially and working towards my personal goals. I also connect with my friends in the evenings over the phone or get together with them on the weekends and this makes me feel more connected to the outside world. Anyway, these are a few things I tried and it really seems to be helping. I feel better about myself and I am more supportive towards my husband and happier with my baby. Hope this helps!
K.

You will never go back to being the person you were before. That is just a fact.
You better do something about your attitude with your husband and do it fast. You are resenting him for some under lying reason and have to figure out what it is and why. Is it because you feel you can no longer work? Is it because you feel he isn't doing enough to help you around the house? Is it because you think he is infringing on your time with your child?
You married your husband, he needs to be a primary loved one in your life. The child is an extension of your love and commitment to each other and is to be a shared experience.
You may want to seek counceling for your attitude, and unfortunately while it is not depression it is an emotional problem and no, you don't get to blame it on hormones, though it sounds reasonable enough it isn't the bottom fact.

I've been married 30 years and I felt that way for much of our early years. What I have learned in life is that what we criticize most in others is what we feel our own weaknesses are. Try very hard to give yourself a few minutes, you know they always say "count to ten", then react. Your husband is not perfect, no one is, and you are not perfect.
You love your baby, that is normal, but you must put your husband before her. You and your husband are a team and your job is to raise a responsible adult from this baby. Your husband may be feeling a bit rejected. He may sense how great your love is for the baby and he is not in there right now. But as your child grows older, you will see, it is you and hubby together. Baby will find her own life. You can be sure that the memories you are creating now with your husb will be the things that carry you through your golden years. Make them good memories. If he does something to try to please you, cleaning, bringing you gifts, shopping for you, even if it is not what you wanted, smile, hug him, thank him.
You want him to be the man of your dreams, so be the women of his and it will all work out.

Having a baby is a MAJOR change to your body, your hormones, and your life! Remember that all this is normal. It is a big adjustment for you and your hubby....and everyone else in your life. Everybody will have to get used to the changes that have happened. It sounds like you are just having a difficult time adjusting. However, I want to tell you that it could be PPD. It doesn't always manifest in the outrageous ways that we see on tv. You don't always hate your kid or something. It can come out in anger, stress, tiredness, etc.. You may want to talk to your doctor about it just to check and make sure. If it is...it's no biggie. It's actually the #1 issue with child birth and is nothing to be ashamed about. If it's not, than great! In either case, make sure you are taking time for yourself. If your like me and your career was important to you, see about picking up a hobby or something that can still help you to feel a sense of accomplishment. A happy mom makes a happy baby! God bless!

Hi M. :)

I went through a lot of what you are talking about as well. I did not think it was post-partum depression because I did not have thoughts of hurting my baby either. However, any major change in your personality like that is likely a hormonal imbalance and you should talk to your doctor about that. I didn't realize for several years after my first daughter that what I had gone through was probably actually post-partum. It doesn't always involve thoughts of hurting your child. I also suffered from general anxiety. I would worry about my daughter getting hurt (not by me) accidentally and I could barely stand to have anyone but me look after her, including my hubby, because I was so convinced that she would get hurt. I would literally pace around the house every time he was out with her. Living with that much stress and anxiety made me pretty crabby and I snapped at him constantly and made him feel like I thought he was a terrible dad.

On top of the crazy hormones, lack of sleep and time to yourself can really take a toll. I think your doctor can help you figure out a way to deal with it all, with or without medicine. Don't be afraid to ask for help. There is a lot of pressure to be a perfect woman and mom and it's just rediculous. You will be much happier when you get the help you need. Hang in there, M.. :)

M.,
Having a baby changes everything, and isn't unfortunate that the ones we take it out on are those closest to us? My husband has received the brunt of a lot of my frustrations too. My baby is a year old now, and it has gotten better, so I think things will for you as well. Make sure you are taking time just for yourself, even if it means just going to the grocery store by yourself. And, hopefully you and your husband can have some date nights. Another huge help to me is having a friend who is older with grown kids. I can always talk or cry with her over my frustrations, and she provides humor and wisdom to help me through it. This website is great, but if you don't have someone like this in your life, try to find it. It really has helped immensely!

I was the same way. I too was surprised at how difficult the adjustment was for me. I used to work full time and could go where ever whenever I wanted. Now I have 2 small ones. I talked to my doctor about it and she said it is definitely hormone related. She said my hormones will probably continue to be out of whack until I stop nursing my daughter. She will be 1 next week. As I have slowed the nursing, I have become more reasonable. I do catch myself overreacting though. I tried to take the approach of not responding to something that made me angry initially for 10 minutes. If i was still upset, then I figured it was legitimate. If i had forgotten about it and was already on to the next task with the baby or whatever, then I figured I should let the initial incident go. I told my husband what was going on and that seemed to help too. He seemed to give me a little more slack. He has been great waiting it out with me. I hope this helps. Oh ya, my doctor also recommended a mild dose of zoloft. I never had the prescription filled so I don't know if it would have helped or not. The doctor also thought just talking with a support group of new young mothers would help, but I didn't know how what I would do with my newborn while I went to these meetings so I didn't do that either.

It may be hormones, but adjusting to life with a baby is a huge adjustment. Unfortunately, it is moreso for the mother, especially if you are breastfeeding. I used to believe in equality in parenting, but I soon realized that women's brains are better set up to care for children. Most men are just not as good at it. Men need specific instructions on what to do to help. It just doesn't seem to come as naturally to men as it does for women.

Life does get easier as the baby gets older. Just don't wait until then to communicate with your husband. Write him a letter or have a heart to heart talk. Let him know what you are feeling and needing from him. Good luck.

Congratulations on your new daughter, M.! You know, it's hard being a working woman, then adjusting to staying home with kids. No... you're not going crazy! You have had a total and complete change of gears in your life. You are now at home every day with your daughter (which I know you wouldn't want it any other way), and being at home can be tough at times -- especially in the winter. You are probably lashing out at your husband, because his life hasn't changed like your has. Sometimes we get resentful of our husbands like that. It's not that he's done anything, but he's the first one through the door and you unintentially jump all over him. Believe me... I've been there! I remember even disliking my husband for NO reason at all! He didn't do a thing... it was all me! I loved being home with my kids, but I felt like I had no sense of "self" anymore. Do yourself a favor... make time for YOU, make time for YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND... ALONE!! It's crucial for you to make time for your husband. Not to mention that if you want more kids down the road, you don't want him to think that you can't "handle" it, because you'll just end up being crabby and neglecting your husband. I know it's not your intention at all... it just happens! Get out of the house during the day with your daughter and join MOPS, Mastering Motherhood, Mom and Me classes, stuff like that. Something that involves you and your daughter. You'll be glad that you did it!! Believe me, you're not alone in this! I can bet you that the majority of the women who read about you have been in your shoes! Best of luck!

You're probably right that it's hormonal issues as opposed to depression (in my humble opinion, it contributes to post-partum depression too - but sometimes depression isn't in there).

Explain all that to the dr. and they can run some tests. They did with me, and found my hormones were a little off after I had my first daughter too. It should be an "easy fix" for the dr. to figure out the hormone levels and supplement them until your body figures out what it's doing.

They may put you on an anti-depressant, or suggest it. Don't consider it as an anti-depressant though - just something to help take the "edge" off so that you don't jump down everybody's throat's all the time. It could be that getting the hormones straightened out will alleviate this and make it a non-issue though.

Just a few thoughts. Hope everything works out!

Good luck!

Hi there,

You've gotten some great advice. I'll just add that sleep deprivation does terrible things to a peson! I didn't feel 'human' until many months afterward, and especially if you're breastfeeding, things can get overwhelming and all-consuming. It is such a beautiful time. But, good to be aware of patterns and ways to keep both relationships strong. Between the baby and taking on a new life role (and going from full-time to not working outside at all is HUGE...don't gloss over this). I went down to part-time when my first was 2 (my husband and I were able to work opposite shifts) and I still work part-time. You might look into that one of these days. You need time to yourself, and he needs time alone with that baby. Nothing you're feeling is uncommon. Hang in there! :-)

I looked up a few books for you (there are ton of good ones). Here's one that got great ratings. Good luck!!!
http://www.amazon.com/When-Partners-Become-Parents-Couple...

Well you have been busy, and emotional. The thought of being dependent on someone is really giving you a hard time. You may need couseling, with your spouse or without. Also speak with your doctor you might have an anxiety disorder, leave no stone unturned. You say repeatedly that you are not depressed, you may be but not over your baby, but from being unemployed. That is a difficult change for alot of women who stay at home. Keep looking and calm down. Try some beginner yoga, reach out for your support group of family, friends, church.

Hi M.,
I understand what you are going through. I was surprised to find out that the "post pardem window" is at least 6 months. I am sure that you are adjusting to a new way of life of staying at home and not working. Please KNOW that you are doing the BEST JOB in the world and the MOST IMPORTANT JOB in the world. Please do not feel like you need to be defined by your work. Enjoy your baby...because in the blink of an eye they will be 15, then 18 and then going off to college and you will look back and say....where did the time go?! I know it is a hard transition to stay at home rather than go to work...all of these feelings are probably going on inside of you.

I went through similar feelings and I had to take anti-depressants for a short while and I did and they helped and I eventually got off of them.

I know it is hard but love your baby, love your husband, I know you do and try to live in the moment. don't live in what was or what is to come....enjoy every moment you all have together, even if it just stolen moments here and there. those are FULL moments of love!
I hope this helps.

M. - SAHM of 4 - 18,14,8,2 - 2 boys and 2 girls.
Blessings to you and your family.

M.,

Congrats on your new one! Just because you aren't having the scary thoughts and all that people associate with post pardum, doesn't mean you don't have a mild form of it. All the lifestyle changes are enough to deal with...but throw a new baby and body changes into the mix and it would be hard for anyone to handle. You may just need something the help smoothe out your moods til your hormones and life stablizes. I wish I had know what it was that was making me feel so out of control when I had my son. It was a rough adjustment. Please talk to your doctor. Together you can come up with a strategy that works best for you. Good luck!

i think it is normal, u have had a ton of major changes in the last couple of months, and you prob arent sleeping very well which makes everything ten times worse! why dont you try to incorporate somemommy "alone" time into your day? i know that always makes me fel more like "myself"( i just had #2 and can completely relate to the short hubby fuse :) ) but most days i hand the boys off to my hubby, even if only for 30 minutes go downstairs, blast out my ipod and workout, i come upstairs in a better more relaxed mood, and i need that time for just ME. Good Luck

Hi M.,

Yes, this is normal and I think it could be part of post-partum depression (PPD)....I have heard that the window is 2 YEARS! Also, irritability can be a sign of depression in some people.

You have also experienced a loss of your old life--working, adult conversation, interaction with co-workers etc. And even though you wanted the baby, and love the baby dearly, this is still a loss, and there maybe is part of you that is grieving over this loss (whether you realize it or not). Loss can lead to depression.

I was in a similar situation with my first baby and had the ppd with the crying jags too.

Be as gentle to yourself as you are to the baby. Take good care of yourself too--good nutrition, vitamins, sleep when baby sleeps (at least you'll get a little sleep that way!)....Also getting out in fresh air and sunshine helped me some. See if there is a PPD support group or a new moms group somewhere you can go to.

Anything else I could say has already been said, I think. Good luck! Enjoy your little one!

K. Z.

M. -

You may want to try a natural hormone balancing cream. Your hormones are all over the place and your progesterone level is probably very low. Just a suggestion. Let me know if you want more information on how to choose one.

L. L.

it is called by some of us baby blues.perfectly normal and it doesnt always happen the minute your baby is born.it is all in how you deal with it.getting into or startingyour own neighborhood group of moms will help tremendously.
this is where you go to a group of moms and talk about your children problems or whatever you deal with everyday.

i used a progesterone lotion to help stabalize my hormones. it helped INSTANTLY. i highly recommend it. i know they have it for sale at health food stores, or from arbonne international (phyto relief, i think it's called)

it's normal-- your body's been through a rollercoaster hormonally!!! i hope it gets back to normal soon!

it's also easier to get angry when you don't get enough sleep...

It takes longer for some women for the hormones to settle. If you are still breastfeeding it will take longer, at least until the production of milk is long gone. Rest rest rest! Take a nap when your baby naps, or just lie on the couch and watch a movie. Don't over-stress your mind. You have to relax. Stretching or doing low-key exercises will help relax your mind and body as well. Listen to music while doing a word search or other puzzles, or take up drawing or painting. Read a book or a magazine. These all can be done while your baby naps during the day. I would also advise you to talk to your doctor about it if you are concerned because it seems to be affecting your relationships. Plus, you don't want your baby to become scared and develop any bad habits from seeing her parents fight and yell at each other. When your husband comes home from work, talk to him. Communication is key. He needs to know how you do things at home and with the baby (baby is used to how you do things so he needs to be on the same page). Let him take over for a while so you can take a walk or jog, take a shower, go shopping, etc. Baby needs alone time with her daddy, as you need some real alone time with yourself.

Yes M., this is COMPLETELY normal! You have entered the crazy life of mother-hood! And you just thought it was about the baby huh? haha
I totally remember after my first even saying that same thing...I love my baby, I would never want to hurt her, I am not depressed...but something is not right. I even said to my husband, I love my baby, but I don't like what it did to ME...I didn't feel like ME anymore. Did that feeling go away...ummm no...LOL Comforting right?
What happened was that ME changed, not in a bad way, but I, like you, went from working full time, to being home almost ALL the time. I would flip out on my husband for really stupid things and then there was the whole weight issue...
There was a lot to deal with emotionally, physically, etc. And then I was tired...LOL uugghh!

It gets better for sure! You are doing a great job, and you will never regret being there with your daughter. It is about learning the balance, and making sure you are getting that time for you, and getting that alone time with your hubby like was suggested. That is really important, that helps you find you again in the midst of diapers, boppy pillows and bottles:)

Good Luck!

I definitely remember going through mood swings and getting mad easier after I had my first son and became a SAHM. I too had worked full time (for 7 years) until I had my baby. I think it's probably a combination of hormonal changes, too little sleep and the change of being home all the time. I LOVED my son to pieces and wanted to be home with him, but I also found myself being a little resentful of my husband for getting to get out of the house and be around adults. I think the best advice I can give you is to get involved with a Moms group. Just having activities planned where I would see other moms going through the same things helped me tremendously. With our second son we also use the book "On Becoming Babywise" to get him on a great sleeping schedule. It sure helps my mood to get enough sleep at night! Also I really needed time to myself. Even if it was just going for a walk by myself, it always made me feel better to get just a little time alone every now and then. Hope this helps! Hang in there.

Hi M.,
My oldest of four is now almost 16, so it's been a while, but I can tell you I remember feeling exactly how you do right now after she was born. I remember feeling totally overwhelmed and irritable and one time I even called one of those crisis hot lines. I felt really stupid afterward but I guess at that moment, I just wasn't sure who else to turn to. Try to go easy on yourself. When you feel yourself boiling up, take a breather. I know for me, I was a perfectionist and no matter how my husband did something to help, it just wasn't good enough. I had to lower my expectations and remember that the world won't end if the dishes aren't washed just right. Your body is STILL going through a lot of adjustments right now. It will get better. I promise!
Good luck
K.

Having a baby changes almost everything in your life. Your life is now all about your precious baby and that can take some getting used to. I suggest taking some time for yourself, doing some of the things you enjoy doing. I know for me it took a very long time to adjust, but i did and so will you. Maybe you could join a local MOPS group to connect with other women. Just know that it will be okay and as far as your husband goes, just count to ten :) My husband and i NEVER used to fight and when baby #2 came along it was very difficult, but we're doing fine and have learned how to help each other instead of working against each other. It will be okay...God bless.

First, yes, it can be postpartum depression. It doesn't only make you feel sad or anger toward your baby, it can manifest itself in other ways and relationships as well.
Second, yes, it's probably hormonal. Add to that the change in life-style, sleep, etc...everything can be out of wack.
Third, you should see a therapist. They are the only people who can tell you if it's PPD, a general hormonal imbalance, or something else (like you need a nap and a cleaning lady).

Talk to a neutral third party like your doctor or a therapist and see what you can find out.