Hot Night but Still Wants Long Sleeve Flannel

Kids don't reason so we have to just tell them, "This is what you are wearing to ned; the white tank top or the blue tank top." Make it what you want but a choice.
F.

One of my sons likes flannel. I am not a fan, so I don't understand it. Instead of the flannel pajama top, how about getting a set of flannel sheets? She can kick them off if she gets hot, and they'll be great for winter!

Dear C.,
Welcome to the world of girls being headstrong about the things they want to wear!
I'm sure your little one is fine.
It doesn't make any sense why she would want something so warm on in the heat, but common sense has nothing to do with it when it comes to a 2 year old. There must be something about the top itself that made her want to wear it.
My daughter went through a phase a little bit older, of insisting that everything she wore be on backwards. I think she was about 3...old enough to put her own clothes on. She was pretty smart for her age and in kindergarten at 4, but I thought she had lost her little marbles. I tried everything, including telling her people would think she looked funny. One day she just looked at me and said they never would have put all the tags in the BACK of her clothes if they wanted her to be able to see them. So, I got sneaky and started cutting the tags out. She got over it and didn't go to kindergarten with her clothes on backwards.
It's not just girls either...
my friend lives where it gets in the 100's in the summer and her 12 year old son wears long pants and a long sleeve shirt every single day. Everyone else can be burning up and it makes you want to faint just looking at him. Every now and then he'll say, "Man, it's hot today," and we're all like, "THEN TAKE SOME CLOTHES OFF!"
He's perfectly physically healthy, he just prefers to be fully clothed from head to toe even if it's hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk. He even came downstairs in a pullover sweater I'd given him for his birthday in October. I said, "Honey, I'm so glad you love that sweater, but really, you don't have to wear it for me. It's 9:30 in the morning and 80 degrees already."
Next time we went, I took him some short sleeved Hawaiian shirts my son had outgrown thinking he might wear them. He did! With a long sleeve t-shirt under them.
Go figure.

I'm sure your daughter is fine, and you did the right thing by checking to make sure she didn't overheat. I doubt there's anything "wrong" with her. She might have been missing that pj top or something. When she gets older you will likely worry she's not covered up ENOUGH in certain situations. Just hang in there!

Children this age LOVE exerting control over their lives, even if some of their actions are ridiculous. If what she wants will not harm her, allow her to choose and do as you did...take it off at night or put more clothes on if she is wearing too little when it is cold.

My daughter often insists on wearing winter pajamas in the summer and when she get overheated, she usually takes them off in the middle of the night. The next time, she insists on wearing them, I remind her how hot she was and am usually able to convince her to only wear them until she goes to bed. In the winter, she will want to wear a bathing suit or flip flops and I allow her to do so, but insist that she brings a coat or her rain boots, etc. She usually decides that mommy was right...and ends up wearing appropriate clothing.

You will wear yourself out warring with your daughter over every little thing and during the ages of 2-4 they are learning and want to do so by experience. They also begin to want some control over their lives, which is why they fight mommy and daddy on everything. Check out the Love and Logic book for the Toddler Years and allow your daughter some choices. She will soon learn that her flannel shirt is too hot in summer and her swimsuit is not appropriate winter wear. :0) Enjoy!

Perhaps she likes the pressure of the fabric against her skin. I'd say just bring in a fan and point it right at her, so she can wear her flannel and still be cool enough. That is, of course, after you've ruled out that she isn't sick. You could have the opposite problem--my child. She never wears any clothes to bed and protests mightily if I try and put anything on her. So i just cover her up well and keep putting the blankets back on at night. She inherited this from me--I always hated nightgowns. We're all so individual, and kids develop and change so quickly. You just have to laugh at it sometimes.

At age 2 she hasn't developed a sense of cause and effect yet. She probably just is attracted to that pj top... or at least was at that moment, and it seemed important to her to wear it. I would have put her in bed without covers and let the pj top be her cover. It sounds like you managed to take care of the situation later, and no harm done. It's just something I wouldn't fight with her over if it happens in the future. You might want to just say "you'll get too hot in the night" but leave it at that if she still insists. Maybe if you don't go in and 'rescue' her later, she'll get the idea on her own. Getting a little too hot and sweaty won't harm her.

My daughter (age 4) is the same way- she loves to wear long sleeved shirts all the time. I just packed away most things that are not seasonally appropriate, keeping out a few long sleeves for trips to cooler places, etc. I just tell her that she will get too hot if she chooses to wear that shirt, and sometimes she changes, sometimes she doesn't. I don't think it harms her- she learns for herself what works and what does not! I have more trouble convincing her to wear something besides a dress or skirt- she hates to wear shorts or pants!

My husband prefers the feel of flannel sheets and so they are on our bed all year long, even in the hot summer. They are surprisingly comfortable. Maybe she also likes the feel of the soft cotton flannel. Try cotton flannel sheets on her bed.

The only thing I can think of is maybe she doesn't like the feel of her sheets on her skin? Some kids decorative sheets are NOT soft because they are made of cheap material.
Children are irrational--they just are! :) A friend of mine told me she once brought her son (now a college graduate) to daycare in a dress, because he insisted on wearing it, and it was the only way to get him out of the house. She called the daycare folks to warn them and they just laughed.

Put her seasonal clothes away out of sight when they are not appropriate for the current season. Choose your battles carefully. But, if it something you know is not healthy, don't let her bully you (if anything happens, you'll always feel guilty).

C....
the only thing you might be missing...? to process this as a two year old, maybe? my daughter is three and the night does not seem complete without at least one odd request. the only other option and i sudder when i turn to this as the it or answer to some cunundrum she marches us headlong into...that she does it because she knows you would rather she didn't...frightening as it is, it is many times the case. if she insists again tell her that her favorite babydoll might be coming down with a cold and that it might better serve her ailing baby to wear such a snuggly flannel shirt, and the best part... her baby (and the flannel shirt)needs to be held close all night long. if she truley just wants to be close to the flannel this may work....if it's your goat she's after offer her a jacket too and proclaim "is this opposite day?" cuz only opposite day would call for flannel in this heat...play this game for a while and redirect her until bedtime comes maybe she'll have moved on...don't be surprised if this works and when tomarrow comes she plays you for a reprise...best of luck to you...flannel and all.

aline

I can think of a couple of things, but you should ask her. She may have a good explanation and be able to tell you something beyond, "want it."

If she is sensitve about clothing textures on her skin, the long sleeves may be the right texture and bare arms could feel uncomfortable against bunched sheets.

If she normally sweats a lot, gets hot and kicks off the covers, she might be cold all sweaty, and not be able to get her blanket just right.

She might just like that item of clothing. My 2yr old son wants to wear his long sleeved tractor shirt no matter how hot, and won't take it off as a top layer.

Whatever the cause, she has her reasons and there is no harm in letting her have her way. Just make sure to offer lots of water the next day. :-)

Maybe she looks at that flannel shirt as a bubba... her security. Maybe you could alter it so it was cooler... or find something else that makes her feel secure.

This actually makes me laugh because my 3 year old is the same way. In the winter she would go put her swimsuit on, I'd make her wear warm clothes over it if we went out, in the summer she'll come down in a sweater and boots. At night, she and her 5 year old sister put on whatever and I don't worry about it. Many times they come out in different pajamas than when the night began. I let them sweat it out and eventually they get it, it isn't hot enough inside our house to worry about overheating. The 3 year old wears her ballet recital costumes everywhere with a ski hat or goggles, boots optional. As long as she is learning what's truly important in life, she can have control over what she wears (I just monitor weather appropriate conditions). Take care & barring anything else being wrong, let her wear what makes her feel good.

Good luck to you!
D.

hi, my daughter is 5 and sometimes likes to wear long sleeves. Sometimes during the day, but if it's too warm, I have her change. But at night she says it's cozy and since she is always kicking the blankets off, I don't worry too much if she is cold because she has on something warm and cozy. For your two year old, it may be a phase of something she really likes right now. For my daughter, if it is really hot, I will put a fan on low and face it against a wall. The air bounces off and circulates around the room instead of directly on her.

Sounds like you have a perfectly normal 2-year-old exerting her independence. She may start picking her day-time clothes too. Just hang in there, it gets even more fun at age 3!

Personally, I usually gave in to those bouts of independence when they were that stubborn about them--unless it jeopardized their safety. I couldn't give a good answer about whether flannel on a hot night would... :)

But congratulations on entering a sometimes frustrating yet usually hysterical period of motherhood. You will now understand why mothers who seem very put together themselves will show up in a store with kids in PJs and cowboy boots! Or last year's Halloween costume! LOL! Good luck, hang in there, and take lots of pictures!

I'm embarrassed to admit (but wanted to share and be honest) that even as a grown adult, I too still like the feel of long pants pajamas (flannel and fleece preferred).....on a hot summer night. I can't seem to wear shorts to bed. Why? It's mostly comfort and security. When I sleep it's like my safe haven and feeling "cozy" and secure helps me sleep. Luckily my son is not like me and doesn't bundle up at night. =) I understand your frustration as my husband is always shaking his head and laughing in disbelief. Obviously I don't have a solution, but I wouldn't be overly concerned. I do have the fan and cool humidifier on at night when it's hot. Good luck.

Hi C.!
My 3 year old is exactly the same, insisting on wearing her tight long sleeve pj top and bottom to bed for daytime nap and nighttime sleep. On top of that, she used to want her blanket over her. At first I got really frustrated trying to convince her that it was too hot to wear those pj. But now I've let it go and let her wear them as well as the blanket. It could be a quirk of hers, or she's simply exerting her independence. After she fell asleep I removed the blanket. As with many things, I'm hoping this is just a phase. She already stops asking to be covered with her blanket. Perhaps one of these days we won't have to put on those long sleeve pjs any more. Good luck with yours.

I am not writing to offer advise, but to say that I have a 3yr old daughter who insists on wearing winter type clothing ALL THE TIME. She insists on long sleeves and sweats from the time she wakes up until bed, and then wants to wear winter pj's. I don't get it and it frustrates me so much! I know it's not a big deal, becasue she just wants to wear the clothes that she LIKES. But c'mon! It's summer in sacramento. I'm afraid she is going to have a heat stroke or something.
Anyways- sorry- I was just relieved to see I don't have the only kid who does this.
=)

It's probably a comfort thing like a security blanket. She sounds like my son. He wore a sweat shirt to the swimming pool a couple weeks ago. As I do laundry I am rotating his winter clothes to somewhere out of reach and out of sight. If he doesn't see them, he won't think about wearing them.

Hi C., it looks like your daughter's flannel jammy top is "the" item of clothing which she has become attached to. Many children get this. My niece was so attached to one of her turtlenecks that she would sit by the washer and dryer and wait for it to be laundered. This was when she would allow my sister to launder it. Perhaps you could have her sleep with it in her bed and keep it with her like a favorite blanket or stuffed animal. Make it seem really fun and neat that she is doing it rather than strange. You could suggest that it wants to cool down and wants to be near her but not on her. Otherwise, leave all covers off and let her sleep in the jammy top only. After all, this too will pass.