How Did Kindergarten Change Your Child?

My daughter started getting MORE moody and was so tired by the time I picked her up (nap time is no more in her Kindergarten classroom) that 2 out of 5 days she'd have a melt down before dinner time. The school she goes to has homework EVERY DAY and it's wearing on both her and I.

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The homework I knew was coming - but homework EVERY DAY was a bit much. At least when a packet is sent home, you have the option of finishing it all in one day leaving the other days for fun and relaxing family time after school - but with homework everyday, you don't and some days errands have to be run and bedtime changes according to if I"m working the graveyard shift or not - so homework everyday has been hard on her and me. There is also a weekly report due for math projects and a book report due once a month. For Kindergarten - it's just too much!

The biggest thing I noticed was that my son came home every afternoon completely wound up. He was/is completely crazy after school. I guess sitting in school all day and not being too active, he saves it for when he comes home, and he is bouncing off the walls for a good 2-3 hours. I also noticed that with other friends' children that started Kindergarten this year.

It also seems that their ability to follow directions greatly declines at age 5. A 2 year old listens better and follows directions better than a 5 year old when at home. (However, during school they become excellent at following directions).

I started my kids with preschool, but I think the same principle applies. It's sooo nice having a teacher reinforce the positive behavior you try to teach your child at home! And it's wonderful getting a child acclimated with kids their own age. All my friends have kids who are older, so preschool was an eye opener for my kids. The older kids my children hung out with at the time had already learned to share... other preschoolers, not so much. It definately taught the girls patience and calmed down their tantrums (they're 21 months apart) being around other kiddos their own age. But like I said, the BEST part is having a teacher reinforcing what you're already teaching your kids. Your child knows which buttons of yours they can press... teachers are more disciplined and don't break as often as we do as tired parents ;) If mom said no AND the teacher said no, I guess that reeeeally means no ;)

Wow, I'm surprised to see the negative responses, but each kid is different and each experience is different. My daughter was so excited to start kindergarten (she had been in a good preschool so she thought of "school" as a positive thing already -- that really does help!). The main difference I noticed was how interested she was in the teachers and other children; she, like many kids that age, was interested in "who are my best friends, who are my good friends, who are friends who I mostly just play with sometimes at kindergarten," etc. It's a time of social learning when they think more about who they are and who their friends are. That's good, because at five they aren't yet "clique-ish" and will find a new best buddy every day or every week; it's OK, as long as they are treating last week's best buddy nicely too. You may find your son really talking about who's his friend, who isn't, what he did with so and so today, how he played with a a kid he hadn't played with before....Encourage him to mix and mingle with all the kids and show an interest when he talks about his new best buddy.

If he already can follow directions from an adult who is NOT mom or dad or a well-known caregiver, he will do fine on directions. The main thing to watch for is the idea of moving from activity to activity when told to; some kids had a hard time with that at the start of K, I noticed, but kids who had been in preschool had less of an issue with it. A good K teacher will watch for this and have strategies for helping kids learn to move with the group.

As for the post mentioning the child who had daily K homework -- that's ridiculous. No kindergartener should have daily homework. There might be an occasional, and I mean very infrequent, assignment, like reading X minutes over a certain period (with your parents), or doing a "100 Days of School" poster with 100 tiny items on it (macaroni noodles, stickers). But if the child brings home worksheet after worksheet each night, there is a problem. That is just busywork, not learning. If your son's K does that, you and other parents should get together and talk with the teaching team and administrators.

As for moodiness and meltdowns, my daughter was in half-day K. So she didn't have those issues because she got to rest each afternoon, which her body and brain needed at five. Our system is gradually moving to all-day K in all schools. I'm sorry to see it, frankly. I know the teachers and system want it because they're expected to cram more "instructional time" in each day to meet state standards and get kids ready for first grade and dreaded standardized tests. But I think many kids are not physically ready for a full day of school, five days a week, at age five; I knew kids who still needed naps at that age though mine didn't. I think moodiness and meltdowns may come from the sheer tiredness of all day at school every day. If you have full day K, find out what the teacher does if she or he has a kid who is still used to down time or nap time and/or needs an extra snack etc. You may also have a period of adjustment where your son is more tired and needs earlier bedtimes, etc.

The one BIG thing that irritates me is that my independent little boy decided he couldn't play by himself anymore.
He also decided he can't clean his room by himself anymore.

we have homework everyday as well, but it only takes 10 mins max.
it's generally writing his name or words that start with a certain letter, and thursdays homework is always bring in a show and tell that starts with the letter, we still have nap time here. full day 830-330

I just wanted to address the comments about homework... My son is in Pre-K right now and but he will be going to all day K in the Fall... He gets a homework packet every week. He LOVES that. They are trying to keep the parents involved in their child's education, so you can be aware of what they are learning, see their progress and be a part of their education. I know that he will also get homework every day in K too, and while it's not expected to be turned in in Pre K, he will have to do that in K. It teaches the child about responsibility and sets up good homework habits from the beginning. HIs homework is usually 1 worksheet 3 days a week that each take about 5-10 minutes, often less. the other 2 days are "discussions" or other minor things we are to do with him, like find a library book about a certain topic to help reinforce what they are discussing in school. He also is doing book reports already, but that's because he's at a higher reading level - it's usually just writing out the title, author, illistrator & what he liked about the book. He does them at his own pace - no due dates or anything.

So, yes, expect your child to get "homework" and help them set up good habits early on and be involved in their education! Keep a positive, FUN attitude about it and they will enjoy showing you what they've been learning!

Besides that - your question S. - my son has LOVED the daily interaction with his peers! but he does have more attitude at home - I heard about some study that pointed out that this was a good sign - it meant they put forth so much effort to be "good" at school and felt comfortable enough at home to relax and maybe deal with things that may have upset them at school (not getting picked to be line leader is one we see a LOT). So the parents who say their kids are acting up at home more, that's a GOOD thing - it means they feel SAFE and COMFORTABLE at home, the parents have done a good job with that! knowing that makes it easier to deal with the crabby kid each night!

Good Luck with the new Adventure that is SCHOOL!

We saw both positive and negative changes in our son when he started Kindergarten. He was SO good all day at school for the teacher but when he would get home, he'd sometimes just lose it bc he'd been holding it in all day. He was tired too. We had quiet time for a bit every day after school where he'd play in his room or watch a cartoon and that helped. Our son can be moody by nature and his moodiness did not improve. He had a hard time getting ready in the mornings and we had to lay down some rules so that he was motivated to get ready for school. He definitely became much more independent that year. He didn't want mama to always play with him anymore and suddenly wanted to just go outside and play w neighborhood kids without me! He did bring home sayings and things he'd heard from other kids. Nothing that was that big of a deal. This year in 1st grade though we saw a lot of maturing and a big decrease in moodiness. He now is much better with his behavior when he does not get his way in life. :)

K made my child a bit more independent. Our K still has a rest time for 30 min. Also, with the all day K we are more tired at night and seem to get sicker more often due to the lack of sleep. :( However, my littler K'er loves going to school and I try to encourage going every day.

I saw no negative impact on my daughter's behavior. We had been diligent with that at home. But half way through the year she was comfortable with her peers and started pushing some class boundaries. :-0. We ironed that out though. She loved seeing friends every day and having structured learning.

I feel like my answer is going to be so completely different, but it's a story I think needs to be shared. My son went to pre-school for 2 years and excelled. It was amazing! Then K came along. He was a bit nervous, but also excited. Enter: bullies. Yes, this starts in K. I caught on to it pretty early, and talked to the teacher. She did nothing. I wrote notes, called, and went to the school and nothing was done. I talked to the principal. He did nothing. I talked to the guidance counselor. She did nothing. My son had horrible regression (peeing in his pants b/c of all the stress) and the school didn't even notice or think maybe I should be called. For 7 months we tried to get the school to stop the bullying, as outlined in their bullying policy. It didn't happen. Then I emailed the director for elementary schools in our county. She finally was able to make things happen, but it was just some damage control. My son was dealing with it better, but they weren't stopping it. After he was still threatened, stolen from, and spit on on the bus, I pulled him out of that school and am homeschooling him. He's excelling now, with me, and the accidents have almost completely stopped. (He had to re-train his bladdar/body how to function. It was potty-training all over again 2 months before he turns 6.)

As far as academically, it helped my son some, but not that much. I was suprised b/c he knew how to print correctly and all of his letters before going in, and some 3 letter words, but they did not reinforce anything, so I had to spend the first week of homeschooling going over that. I learned that he was guessing words or remembering them (he has an amazing memory, like his daddy!) in the story. He was "reading" to me and he got every word right so I thought he knew them. He was just repeating though, not reading. Now we're working on phonics, etc again.

I don't want to scare you; most experiences I've heard about have been good. My son is in a school that is supposed to be good academically, but he has a really poor teacher and the principal is new so the school's record does not reflect him at all. He was also bullied on the bus as well and had a bad bus driver. How he was unlucky enough to get all three of those, I don't know, but that's what happened. Also, bullying seems to be a bad issue in that school. I've been in touch just this week with another mom who had the same thing happen to her daughter. I wish I'd known her sooner! She's been fighting the school system for 3 years now. But, what I do want is for you to be aware that this *can* happen. It doesn't mean it's likely, but it's possible. So before even going into this, find out the bullying policy. Get in touch with school board members and find out who to contact there if you have problems. Talk to your son about bullying-both being a bully and being a victim of bullying. Become educated yourself about problems like these and how to appropriately and effectively take care of them. Even if you never need to know, another mom you know might need that information some day. Also, talk to your spouse/significant other/etc about what to do if something like this happens to your child. Will you homeschool? Will you go to private? Will you transfer within the school system? There are options. After my experience, I don't trust anyone in that school system with my son, b/c in the end they wanted to blame him for being bullied. They said perhaps if he'd have gone to pre-school, then I told them he did for 2 years. They said maybe he wasn't used to boys. I told them all his best friends at church are boys, and they are a rough and tumble group and all the kids in pre-school were boys except for 2. They said he should have told a teacher, but she told him to just do it back. They said he should have told the bus driver but he said if my son didn't stop doing whatever (I never found out what-I was always told my son wasn't doing anything bad, which I knew wasn't right from a friend who subbed for his gym class), then he was just going to leave him with the principal. My poor son thought that meant he'd be taken away from his family permanently. He was VERY upset. To know all this, you have to have open communication with your child about it. Also, get a notebook for his stories from school. Anytime anything happens like bullying, write it down, along with the date, what you did, and what the school's response was. If I'd have done that, I'd have pulled him out long ago and wouldn't have kept trying to work with the school, but it's also proof that the school could use in punishing bullying.

Hopefully nothing bad will happen and it will be a great experience. But, if it does, it would be so much better/easier for you to make the best decision for your child if you have all the information I mentioned.

Good luck!

Both my kids went to preschool and HATED the idea that in kindergarten, they actually had to work! Other than that, it was fine. My children loved the daily peer interaction -- of course, it brings up all kinds of issues that you didn't have before. They learn behaviors that you may not like and have to deal with and words sometimes too! Also, they struggle with all kinds of things that happen -- almost every class has a kid who has a tendency to bully or a mean girl, or just kids who are friends with your child one day and not so much the other. So, you start being a psychologist. I think it's normal for humans to struggle with these things and the earliest they learn to deal with them, the better they will deal with them when they are older. So, in short, lots more challenges, but lots of fun too.

I saw a HUGE change in my daughter from the beginning of K until now. She never was in daycare and did not do preschool. She struggled with the first few months of school with not being able to "do what she wanted to do when she wanted to do it." She had an amazing teacher who got her to follow rules and directions without crushing her free spirit or her individuality. Now she is reading on a middle 1st grade level, loves to learn and has a classroom full of "best-best friends. She is a better rule follower, and better friend.

My children changed kindergarden-they were an example to others and well received and loved by the other children and the staff. They were leaders and set an exemplary standard for others to follow.Their classroom looked and functioned like a well run law office. They were the best years of my life-and theirs. In other words, the training and foundation had already been established before they attended school. They were fortunate to have the opportunity to attend private kindergarden-prticularly the one that I chose for them-it was amazing-and very hands on and incredibly -fun!

My daughter has adjusted very well to Kindergarten. She looks forward to going everyday. I have noticed that she has learned a lot since the beginning of school. She has really advanced quick with her reading I saw no negative impacts of her going. She has always been a social butterfly, and loves seeing her friends everyday, and learning new things, and she has always been able to follow directions well so no problems there.