How Long Should My 3 Month Old Be Sleeping at Nighttime

Updated on May 22, 2008
K.B. asks from San Pedro, CA
56 answers

How long should my 3 month old be sleeping at night time? Now he takes his last predicable feeding between 8-9pm. THen he is up again by 1am then again at 4 or 5 fro another feeding then up for day at about 7 or 8. Baby wise say's that he should be sleeping 11 hrs STRAIGHT! This seems so unreasonable to me. I started giving him rice cereal in his bottle at his night feedings. Has extened his sleep timeby about an hour maybe 2 sOMETIMES! HELP!

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So What Happened?

THANK YOU everyone for your advise. ALL OF YOU will be happy to know I have taken Lukas OFF of the cereal! I am just going with the flow now and getting up as often as he needs to eat. I am a zombie at work but "OH WELL"! As far as BABYWISE is concerned, I had no idea about the backround of that book. Thank you!

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E.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello Kristin,
I have a 4yr old and a 2yr old, and i have always been told by their pediatrician to never put baby cereal in their bottle. The doctors don't recommend introducing solids until 4-6 months (prevent allergies), and this is spoon fed only when the baby is able to sit or at least hold their head up. The doctors also said that if a baby sleeps at night for 5 hrs straight, it is considered sleeping through the night. Sorry if I started off preachy, but many kids these days suffer from obesity. According to the pediatricians I've encountered, studies have shown that putting cereal or baby food in the baby's bottle is a contributing factor to bad eating habits.

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A.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

were still going through that...Tyler is now 6 months, and is starting to sleep about 5-7 hrs , so, be patient, keep incorporating the x2o in his formula, and he will be fine.....

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D.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

I used babywise with both my girls and it worked like a charm. I followed the book word by word though. Baby wise is not for everyone. If you dont care for their methods then don't do them and just carry on and dont stress about it. I never put cereal in the bottle mainly because my doctors told me not too. What ever you find works for you go with it.
Good luck to you.

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J.M.

answers from Honolulu on

Hi Mama K.,
Don't be worried. I can't believe your worried. YOUR BABY SOUNDS PERFECT! He is sleeping almost 12 hours at night and waking to eat about every 4 hours. What more could you ask? I personally think that some of today's popular baby books are ridiculous. "Your baby should be sleeping 11 hours straight at 3 months"... LOL. Doesn't that sound silly! Why are mom's trying to schedule their baby's lives? Go with your baby's flow. Eating and sleeping are necessities and your baby will eat when their hungry and sleep when they're tired (naturally more at night when it's dark) unless you get in the way. Doesn't that make sense? Please moms, just let nature happen! Trying to do otherwise just makes life difficult. Also, your baby should ONLY be eating milk (breast is best :)). At the earliest, food can be introduced at six months.

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C.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.,

You must be super busy and exhausted with two little ones and a business!

Trust your instincts- 11 hours IS unreasonable! At this stage it's still important to feed your baby on demand- not only is it necessary for his nutritional needs, but also to keep up your breastmilk supply (if this is important to you). Breastmilk actually changes its composition as time pass in terms of the protein-water-fat ratio, so when a baby wants to eat, he may need something very specific at that time (to quench thirst, get protein, or get fat). Trust yourself and your baby. Baby's sleep needs are also developmental- that is, based on his neurological development.

My baby is now 8 months old; she started sleeping longer stretches (around 4 to 6 hours) around 5 months or so. It also depends on your baby's weight.

Oh- the rice cereal is just carbs, with far less fat and protein than breastmilk, so although it will fill his tummy it doens't really address his nutrition needs and isn't the answer to longer sleeping. Also it's a little early for any food besides milk- this may increase their chances for developing allergies.

One thing that has really helped me get plenty of sleep is nursing in bed lying down- I get more sleep and she falls right back to sleep. If your baby takes a bottle, maybe dad can do those middle of the night feedings and give you a break!

Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

At three months both of mine were on the same schedule as yours. I personally have more of an attachment parenting style and feel that if my little one is crying then they obviously needed something. I could not let my babies cry it out especially so young. My fourteen month old still wakes up at least once a night. There is always going to be something whether it is a cold, teething, growth spurts, etc. that will interrupt their sleep.
Your baby is still so young and is growing so much. I would careful about the rice cereal, since your little one does not have a full mouth of teeth, their little tummies have a hard time digesting starches and it can lead to gluten intolerance. Everyone will tell you it is okay but I would wait until about eight months.
There is a great book called "Healthy Kids The Natural Way" by Mary-Ann Shearer and Charlotte Meschede. They talk about feeding your baby and toddler, teeth, food allergies and intolerances, primary, junior, and high years. It reads like an encyclopedia so your just read the chapters that apply to your family at the time. It even helps you get back in shape too.

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M.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I read and followed the book Baby wise, too. I learned so much from that book and the results were two awesome sleepers. While I thought the book was great, I also thought it was very rigid. I found that the best solution for my children was a modified version of it. Your 3 month old is doing great with sleep regardless of what the book says. There are many parents out there that would do anything to get their little one to sleep 4-5 hour stretches. Your little one may still be hungry at night and need those extra feedings. This is when I would follow your babies pattern not Baby wise. As your baby gets older you'll see how well the feed, wake and sleep pattern works for naps etc.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Here is a link on how much sleep a baby needs:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_how-much-sleep-does-your-chil...

NOT all babies sleep 11 hours straight. It's this kind of information that really stresses out Moms.

MOST babies don't do that. Don't worry. Each baby is different...don't compare, it'll only cause stress.

"Sleeping through the night" means, for a baby, sleeping at least 6 hours straight.

Your baby is 3 months old...this is a "growth spurt" age. Every 3 months or so, there is a growth spurt...this means they are changing physically and cognitively, and their feeding needs increases and they need to feed more and more frequently...thus, they wake more at night. If this happens, feed baby....they need it. So that means you will need to wake more at night to feed him, this is normal.

Your baby is only 3 months old... personally, I would NOT be giving her rice cereal, without consulting your doctor. A baby's stomach & digestive system is NOT yet fully developed....and giving them cereal to early can also trigger allergies etc. For the first year of life, their digestive sytstem & stomach are still developing. This is why, there is a specific time-line and reason for giving babies food at only a certain age. Cereal is often given to an "infant" way before 6 months of age, for the Parent's sake & to get them to sleep longer at night...not for the baby's sake.

A baby is a baby for only a short time... and they do wake more when going through phases & when they are hungry. You cannot "not" make them wake up...if this is what they "need." Also, when they start teething, they will wake more too...what then? They need to know that Mommy is there to wake up, reassure them, feed them, comfort them, and help them.

I suspect your baby is going through developmental changes, and this is why he is waking more. It's temporary. He's probably hungry.

Try nursing him more during the daytime, or formula if giving him a bottle. If nursing, feed him on demand, even if this means waking up at night.

I would go according to your baby's needs and patterns. With my first baby, she woke a lot, for a long time before she started to sleep through the night. She didn't sleep through the night until she was a toddler. With my 2nd child, he's 21 months...and he sleeps through the night already...but didn't start doing that until about 16 months old or so. I breastfed both kids.

Each baby is different. They need to know that Mommy will respond to their needs. I know it's tiring waking up all night...but oh well. It will soon pass, and they will no longer be babies. Enjoy the closeness now...they grow up so quickly.

Take care,
~Susan

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K. - at 3 months old it sounds like your baby is pretty typical - waking up a few times a night. It won't be until he's older that he'll likely sleep 11 hours straight. At 3 months he is probably sleeping a total of 15 - 18 hours a day - but usually 4 - 6 hours for the longest stretch. It's typical for a newborn to take several naps a day. Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.,

I agree with Nina G. and Tracy O. It is my opinion, but I would not follow Baby Wise either. It sounds unreasonable. At 3 months old your baby is so little and needs to eat often. An 11 hour stretch is too long. I think a 4 hour stretch is fantastic. Time will help your baby's sleep improve, as he grows. As for the rice cereal, your baby's gut has not sealed and the food can permeate through, leading to allergies (I'm not a dr. but this is from what I understand). I would consult your pediatrician about the rice cereal. They say it really does not help them sleep better, as you have found out. You're doing a great job & your baby is lucky to have a mommy who cares so much!

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W.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.,
It sounds like your baby is starting to have a schedule, it's hard because this is the time you are craving a longer stretch at night.
One thing I wanted to mention is the rice cereal in the bottle. My son has seen a physical therapist who specializes in feeding issues and she says it is very dangerous to do this because of a huge choking hazard. Also, 3 months old is too young for solid foods and doesn't help them sleep longer. I would please talk with your doctor regarding the rice cereal in the bottle.

Good luck, longer stretches are just around the corner.

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K.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

First, congratulations on your new baby! I'm an older mom too. I don't know what Baby wise is, but it sounds all wrong to me. From everything I read, 6-hours is considered sleeping through the night. At 3-months, a child still needs nourishment. A formula-fed baby might sleep for longer periods because formula takes longer to digest than breastmilk. I nurse my 5 month old son on demand. I nurse him at 7:30pm before bed, and he usually wakes at 11, 3, and 6 and is up around 7am. Also, I'd ask your pedi about putting cereal in your son's milk. First, cereal has very few calories. Second, a baby's digestive system is still developing and may not be ready to handle solid foods. My pedi has my son only on breastmilk until 6 months, when we'll start introducing solid foods. Relax and trust your instincts. Also, listen to your baby. If he's waking and crying then it's probably for a good reason. Best wishes!

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E.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wish I had some support to offer - I can only empathize with you. My son had a very similar sleep pattern - he would go to bed for the night between 8 and 9 and get up about 2 times before getting up for the day. My doctor reassured me that this was normal and he just needed to eat more than other children his age. After agonizing over his sleep habits for quite some time I came to the conculsion that it was what worked for him and since he was a otherwise happy and healthy baby, that he would grow into better sleep habits, which he eventually did! I hope that you are able to find some answers!!!

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M.J.

answers from San Diego on

My little girl is almost 10 weeks and has a very similar night schedule to what you describe. I read Babywise and here is what I've taken from it so far:
1. get them to take full feedings and a schedule will establish itself - this has worked and she eats about every 3 hours.
2. establish the eat, wakeful activity, sleep cycle - I try to do this, but she resists napping in the morning (even when clearly tired) and then falls right to sleep after the 3:30pm feeding for a glorious 2 hour nap that I share with her. So I'm just going with it and trying to find what pattern works for her.
3. flexible schedule - we try to stick to within 30 min either way of our schedule, but on days we get off then we just to 3 hours between feedings or whenever she gets hungry and try to work our way closer to schedule as the day goes on.
4. fussy babies may not follow this exactly, but are still helped by a routine - this seems to be true, life has been easier since we have a flexible schedule. She had a lot of bad gas in the first month but is doing better now. She still has some problems at night sometimes. Ever since we gave her the pacifier (against some advice, but she is a really good eater) she cries a lot less, the only problem is she wants to sleep with it, then drops it and gets upset. Of course she is not quite big enough to grab it and put it back in her mouth, so this can be trying in the middle of the night!

So clearly I'm not following it to the letter, but it does have some helpful ideas. I'm not too worried that she doesn't sleep through the night as much as I look forward to the day she does!

I went to a breastfeeding support group where the LC told us once your baby has regained their birth weight you don't need to wake them in the night to feed. So we are trying to let her sleep as long as she will and then feed whenever she gets up. I think her longest so far is 5 wonderful hours.

The book The Baby Whisperer mentions looking for the first signs of sleepiness and try to start getting them to sleep then instead of waiting until they get grumpy ("the third yawn is too late"), but it doesn't sound like that's your problem.

I went to a seminar titled The 90-minute Baby Sleep Program (based on the book) which stands on the premise that humans have a 90-min wakefulness cycle, so the baby will get tired in some multiple of 90min after first waking. There was a chart suggesting a child of 2-3 months should get about 15 hours of sleep cumulative between both day and night. You could add up your naps and nighttime sleep and see if he's in the ballpark, but it's an "average" number anyway.

I know I'm probably over analyzing everything with my baby too ;-) A friend of mine said "go with what works" and I think I'm finding that to be the best advice.

cheers,
m

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P.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

I never saw a 3 month old sleep 11 hours!! They need more nutrition than that. They should still be eating every 4-6 hours. The only things you can do that will get you a little more sleep are the rice cereal, if it agrees with him, and trying to get that last feeding of the day (8-9pm) later, to feed him just before you go to bed, maybe 11pm. Keep him up as late as you can, even try to bath him if that helps keep him awake later. If you can get him to sleep just before you go to sleep, he will sleep till 4am and probably go right back to sleep after he takes his bottle. That will help you feel more rested and he will begin sleeping longer in the coming months.

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R.S.

answers from San Diego on

I had a kiddo who was in the 90th percentile for ht. and wt.--he NEVER slept 11 hours---I think like 2x in his life and he's 7 yrs. old now--some people don't need a lot of sleep!!! I'd say your child is doing awesome---I think for 3 months old this looks okay to me....hang in there!!!!!

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L.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

At 4 weeks my son was only waking up once around 3am, then by 6 weeks slept all night. I too followed most of Baby Wise. SOmetimes they just get used to getting up and you feeding them instead of comforting themselves back to sleep. Usually they're not hungry, (unless going through a change of sorts or a growth spurt...) they just want to be soothed. Good luck.

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H.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have NEVER heard of a 3 mos old sleeping 12 hours straight.Maybe a 3 YEAR old!! Their little bodies need nourishment during the night!I was nursing exclusively and I think I recall 4 hours at a time MAX!! Check Dr Sears website. In order thrive I'm sure they need to feed more often. Remember though all babies are different. I just remember responding to my daughters cues the best i could. Also my mom said 'never wake a sleeping baby'. It's so fuunt coz' i still feel guilty waking her for school (she likes to sleep late- always has) and she's 5 yrs old now!! LOL Enjoy your little ones@@xo H.

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

You need to remember that "Baby Wise" and other baby advice things are just that - advice. They are not the "standard." ALL babies are different. While some babies might sleep through the night immediately, other babies might take months or even a year to sleep through the night. The issue is that you just need to know and understand YOUR baby's patterns, and be patient and accomodating to them. Before you know it, your baby will be sleeping longer and longer through the night. Also, food has nothing to do with sleep - it is a myth. Just feed your baby as often and he needs/wants to eat - just be sure that he is satisfied/full at each feeding.

Good Luck!

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B.R.

answers from San Diego on

My son was sleeping 12 hours a night at that age, it is possible. He actually started sleeping 8 hours at a time when he was 4 weeks, doc said this is normal and fine.

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N.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

K., I have an 11.5 month old and she didn't sleep through the night until she was about 5-6 months. Every baby is different. The reason, I'm responding to you is because it is not recommended to put cereal in your babies bottle. Cereal needs to be spoon fed. My daughters pediatrician clearly told me not to put cereal in her bottle, I didn't start her on cereal until she was 4 months. It sounds like you're just trying to get him to sleep through the night, but he's still a little guy and still needs to eat often. Don't worry, he'll sleep more as he gets older. I just kept telling myself that this wouldn't last forever.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Hi K., at 3 months he should be sleeping through the night, Who is baby wise? never heard of that, 11 hours at night i can almost see, but at nap time, at least 2 hours. I startd my babies on rice cereal at 6 weeks and they were sleeping thrpugh the night a 6 weeks. Mother for 24 years J. L

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D.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

First of all..... DON'T LISTEN TO BABYWISE.... you'll be miserable. I tried Babywise with my first child..... it was a miserable experience!!! Don't try to force a concept, you have to do what works best for you & your baby. Every baby is different.... give him time... afterall, he's only 3 months old.

FYI - I have a 10 week old that is basically on the same schedule, some nights he sleeps longer but not usually shorter (thank goodness).

Good luck!!

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A.W.

answers from San Diego on

Sounds like you have a normal baby! :-) Only one of my 5 slept completely through the night at 6 weeks, the other 4 were over a year old before they did.

You didn't say whether you were nursing or using a bottle. If you are nursing keep feeding the way you are, it's how your body knows how much milk to make.

I really dislike the book Becoming BAbywise, it negates the individuality of your child, and is not about helping your baby but making a child fit into your schedule. Please listen to your mothering instinct and enjoy your baby. In the research I did on parenting books this series scared me especially after reading the book. This book creates feelings of guilt, anxiety, inadequacy in parents because the teachings are in conflict with their own intuition regarding their own baby. Being a parent is not about conflict especially at 3 months!!!!!

Rice cereal will not help your baby sleep longer and in fact may cause digestive problems later!!

Please read the following link. http://www.rickross.com/reference/gfi/gfi5.html

Please just love your baby and follow your own instincts, you know what is best for your baby.

Best of luck,

A.

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C.T.

answers from San Diego on

I think your baby sounds like its doing a great job at sleeping. I don't think 3 month old babies can go that long without eating. I have a 5 month old and he's just starting to sleep for a longer period of time. There are a lot of books out there telling you that babies should sleep a "X" amount of time but every baby is different and young babies need nourishment and cuddling every few hours. You're doing a great job already feeding your baby every few hours at night. I feel your pain though. Hang in there, it will all be a distant memory soon.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

You can "try" and follow whatever advice and books you want.... but your baby may have a totally different idea about that. 9 months of waking every 2.5 - 3 hours took it's toll on me but it got better. Not by anything I did, it was just her pace of development. It stopped being so hard when I just accepted it. She's 18 months now and STILL wakes up a couple times a night. She settles down in a less than a minute but she's not an easy sleeper. My advice? Deal with it.... what other choice do you have but to make yourself crazy? Some babies just aren't easy sleepers.

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B.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Throw your Babywise book out with the trash! Stuff like that will only make you panic because it does not hold realistic expectations AT ALL and it just makes you feel like a failure. Your intuition was right - 11 hours straight for a 3 month old IS completely unreasonable. It actually seems pretty unreasonable for a one-year-old too, in my opinion. Here's what I've found - your baby will sleep by its own guidelines. If you are breastfeeding/bottle-feeding whenever the baby's hungry, then you're covering all your bases. Personally, I would ditch the rice cereal since it sounds like the only reason you use it to try to prolong your baby's sleep. Rice cereal has little to no nutrition AND babies shouldn't be on solids until they're 6 months or so. If the only reason your baby sleeps longer with the rice cereal is because he is in a "food coma," that's not optimal :)

I don't understand books that say that babies should be sleeping these longs stretches... they are babies and their most basic job is to grow - about 3x their size in one year! That means lots of nursing, nursing, nursing and if they are sleeping for 11 straight hours, how can they be eating?? I would also recommend getting some better books. Those things can really wreak havoc on your already vulnerable and taxed brain! Good luck :)

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K.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

HI K....I have only read a few of your responses and thought I would share my experience. I have 5 month old twin boys and at three months we were on the following schedule. 7pm dinner, 11pm bottle (we had to wake them to feed them) and then they would sleep until somewhere between 3 and 4 am. For the moms that tell you rice cereal in the bottle is a horrible idea...I'll tell you that at 2 months my pediatrician told me I could put cereal in their bottles...1 teaspoon per ounce only. They worry about allergies if you start too early, but you know mine did fine with it and both my husband and I had cereal "early" and we don't have ANY allergies...so just do what you feel is right and ignore everyone else thats negative about it. I can tell you that the sleeping pattern changed for my boys around 3 1/2 months old...when I found they weren't really that hungry in the middle of the night. I then eliminated the 11pm feeding and found they woke up around 2 to 3am. I would feed them and then give them breakfast between 8 and 9am. We started solids at 4 months and 1 week and that made a big difference in their sleep. They get one thing of fruits for lunch and then sweet potatoes before bed and since we have been doing that we eliminated another bottle and they dont have a bottle but 4 times a day now. Granted they are all 6 ounce bottles! We are still working on sleeping through the night, but they dont need to eat anymore in the middle of the night and it makes it SO much easier to get up and just soothe. Good Luck...I dont think you are doing anything wrong and I think your babies sleep habits are fine!! Dont listen to everyone that says their babies were sleeping through the night at x many weeks...because when you ask how many hours that is...they most certainly will not tell you 11!! Throw the book away.

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D.B.

answers from San Diego on

That sounds like he is totally on track - Babywise is not always "wise":) It totally depends on the child - my son is 5 1/2 mo. and still eats around 10pm and again at 4 or 5am...At that age, going 4-6 hours between feedings is normal until about 9 months I believe...Adding cereal (per my peds recommendation) never seemed to help my son sleep longer, but you never know :) good luck- he is doing fine!

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T.

answers from Las Vegas on

K.,

Babywise is a dangerous book to be using with a baby. There have been many problems with the book including parents who follow the scheduling too strictly and end up with a baby who fails to thrive. If you want a good book, try something by Dr. Sears or look at the "happiest baby on the block." I've heard great things about them and they are much more baby friendly. Babies this age should be fed on demand until they are satisfied. Some babies sleep through the night very early on and some don't. 3 months old is way to young for an serious sleep training. And you shouldn't give rice cereal in a bottle - it is a choking hazard and any solids to a 3 month old is usually frowned upon. Most doctors recommend waiting until 4-6 months (the AAP recommends waiting until at least 6 months for solids). Every baby is different but rice cereal also constipated the heck out of my kids and that isn't particularly restful.

The ability to sleep for long periods of time is a developmental milestone and one that kids hit when they are ready. My first child didn't sleep through the night until he was 2 (he was up every 2-3 hours at night until he was 1). My second child slept for 6 hours at a stretch from the time he was just a few weeks old. I parented both of them the exact same way and fed both of them on demand.

Just in general, I'm with you. I think expecting a 3 month old to sleep 11 hours at night is crazy. They are growing and developing really fast at this age and their stomach is tiny. It is probably time to step away from the book and follow your instincts!

:-)T.

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J.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

My advice would be not to be concerned with what babywise says! It is just a book and all babies are different. I know it seems like you will never sleep again, but at that age your baby still needs to eat every 3 hours or so. My little one is 5 months old and she just started sleeping longer a month or so ago. She still does not sleep 11 hours straight though. She sleeps from 9 or so to 6 or 6:30, and then goes back to sleep for a few more hours after she eats. Hang in there mom!

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A.Z.

answers from Los Angeles on

that is totally normal. your child is very young and way too young for sleep training. your child's growth is the fastest it will ever be right now and he needs those calories.

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G.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

With Babywise you need to read it with a grain of salt. Use what you can and what works for you but don't stress if it doesn't work like it says it should. I spent many aggravating hours and days trying to get my first to follow it and eventually I tossed the book. Now I just follow the idea of sleep, eat, play...sleep, eat, play and that's great for me. My kids are 2 and 8 months old. Just let your baby dictate how the night should go. Be careful about putting anything other than b.milk or formula in the bottle. Adding rice cereal is only giving you an extra hour or so and really the absolute earliest for solid food is 4 months, but even that is early. You want your baby to eat well when the time comes and sneaking it in their bottle doesn't teach them how to eat. I know that's not the point right now, but you'll have to think long term with it. A great book is, "Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense" by Ellyn Satter. 2 nutritionists have suggested it and it has become my feeding bible. You're being a great Mom by using your instincts...keep it up!!!!

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L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K. and other Moms who have come across this unfortunate book.

Please, please take the time to read the link in Tracy O's response regarding Babywise (http://www.ezzo.info/babywise.htm). At the hospital where I had my son, I received a flier warning parents about this book. According to the flier, the husband of the husband/wife author team, Gary Ezzo, "holds neither an associate nor a bachelor's degree from any college; his master of arts degree in Christian Ministry includes credit for life experience. (The wife) Anne Marie worked only briefly as an R.N. decades ago."

This book is a secularized repackaging of their religious based "teachings" and their original church, as well as a subsequent church they were involved with, have publicly distanced themselves from them.

Here is a quote from the website referenced in Tracy O's post: "The Ezzos sought refuge at a church pastored by a friend who was involved in their organization, but within a few years even this church had excommunicated them. Their accounting firm dropped them. Their adult children cut off contact with them. The publisher of Ezzo's secular books, Multnomah, returned publishing rights to him following an investigation of alleged medical misinformation and character problems. Leaving their estranged children and grandchildren in California, the Ezzos moved across country to South Carolina. Their secular and church-based lines of books are now self-published."

The books are SELF published, the Ezzos have NO training in child development, psychology, breastfeeding OR pediatric medicine and the real experts in those fields have roundly criticized their methods. Their methods have not been shown by the medical or the professional psychology community to be safe and may also be dangerous for some vulnerable babies. (And, really, how successful must their parenting have been if they have no relationship with their own children or grandchildren?!)

Yes, there are good things in this book, but ALL of that good advice can be found in other reputable baby books.

In regards to the sleeping issue, if you want a balanced approach (between higher parental control and on-demand parenting), I found "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth to be helpful. I do know that there is no research that demonstrates that adding rice cereal to the bottle at such an early age helps them sleep longer. You are absolutely right to trust your instincts...11 hours at 3 months IS unreasonable for YOUR baby. As others have said, babies are ALL different. Although I won't say it's impossible, I do think it would be a VERY RARE 12-week-old that sleeps 11 straight hours consistently every night. Your little one sounds extremely NORMAL!

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J.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.: I can understand you have your hands full,but understand,that All babies are different. As a matter of fact, your second baby will probably do everything opposite of your first.They have two totally different personalities.
I don't know what (Baby wise) is, but 11 hours straight would be suggesting we force our babies to fast at 3 months old! I swear, I don't know where some of this logic comes from.No baby should hold off 11 hours for a feeding,unless of course the parents let them cry it out all night. (Ignoring a hungry babies cries).Your correct, it is unreasonable,and cruel.At three months, their little tummys will only hold so much milk. Your baby is doing fine,sleeping the hours he is.Hes still a little young for rice cerial,watch him for signs of constipation.Hang in there K.,your baby will be eating, growing, and sleeping longer for you soon.Hes right on track.The very best to you and your little ones.

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C.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Babywise shmaybywise. Honestly. 11 hours? Our pediatrician had us waking them up and feeding our twins every three hours at 3 months. It sounds like your baby wakes up a pretty normal amount. If the baby was waking up every two hours it would still be in the range of normal. Your child may not sleep for 11 uninterrupted hours consistently for YEARS!

Do not put rice cereal in the bottle. Why not have your husband do at least one of the night feedings to give you a longer stretch of sleep at least some of the time?

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A.Y.

answers from Reno on

Every baby is different. 11 hours doesn't really mean straight through, that just means thats how much they need thru the night plus naps. at three months my daughter slept 8 hours straight but that was it. Unfortunatlly the only thing you can really do is try to set a schedual and the best way to do that is not with abook or magazine, but with your mom knowledge, and you baby doctors medical knowledge. However my niece, who is now 6, did not sleep more than 4 hours straight until she started pre-school at 4.5.

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P.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.,
I also have a 3 month old, and on a really, really good night, she'll sleep 5 hours. But she averages anywhere between 3-5 hours a night. Sounds like your baby is right on track. I was told that the babies won't sleep through the night until they're a few months older, but I think each child is different. As long as your baby is thriving and doing well, I wouldn't worry about it. And one day, he'll sleep 11 hours straight... but he'll probably be a teen when it happens! ; )

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C.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

K. -

My son, now two, did not sleep through the night until he was almost ten months old...he was up every 3 hours to eat and then went to 8 hours. I learned with my second, now 3 months that they are all differnt, she sleeps from 8 to 5. I think your son is very normal.

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W.A.

answers from Honolulu on

How much are you feeding him? My 13 week old gets his last 4.5oz bottle at 9-10pm and then doesnt wake back up to eat until 6-7am. From when we got home from the hospital because he had lost a good amount of weight we used to have to wake him up every 2-3 hours to eat. Up until he was about 8 weeks. Then sicne he had gained a bunch and was a good weight we decided to push and see how long he could go. during the day we make sure we keep him on a every 3 hour feedign schedule of 4.5oz of formula and every 5 hours he breast feeds. He only takes about 3 1-2 hour long naps during the day and we keep him up from around 7 till it's time for that bed time bottle. After the bottle we cuddle up for rocking and a pacifier to suck on then off to bed he goes. We just didnt set the alarm one night and waited to see what he did. Maybe your baby wants more to eat. Our pediatrician said give him how ever much he wants till he is content. Maybe you should try uping the ounces of formula and maybe a pacifier if you dont already use one? He may just want the sucking sensation and not necessarily a bottle? I hope he stats sleeping for you soon, and hopefully all of our responses will come up with something to help you get there. Good luck.

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T.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi K.,
Babies still wake up at night at this age because they need the nourishment. It isn't until 4 months that they start to not require the extra feeding, but may still need the comfort of you. As far as Baby-wize, please check out this site: http://www.ezzo.info/babywise.htm as it dispels most of what Mr. Ezzo (he is not a dr. or a child phsycologist) says. In fact many cases of failure to thrive are attributed to people using his practices.
Follow your mommy heart. You said that 11 hours straight seemed unreasonable to you, and you are right. Your instice told you something wasn't right about it, and you are checking it out. Good for you! Anytime something doesn't seem right, no matter what source it is from, always check it out. That way ant time someone mentions something you should do, you have the information to make the best possible solution for your family.
Have you asked your pediatrician about the cereal? Most Dr.s do not reccomend cereal to babies until at least 5 months old, as their digestive systems are not developed enough yet.
Your baby is doing fine with waking two times. Many babies at this age are still getting up 4-5 times, so I would just let him decide how much he needs.

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G.B.

answers from Las Vegas on

Babywise HA should be called Babyinstigator! My husband and I have battled round and round about this sleeping theroy since the first week. Our adopted boy is 7 weeks old and hubby has felt since the first week he should be sleeping through the night so much that he tried to give him cereal to make him sleep more. Plus he is constantly waking the sleeping baby thinking this will help.

In my opinon as long as you are progressing in baby's growth, the amount they eat and sleep you are doing the right thing. We started with 2 oz every 2 hours and now are up to 5 oz every 5 hours. At times the baby sleeps 6-7 hours and to me that is a huge victory. I'm a firm believer in reading the books with a grain of salt and following my heart. The baby knows what they want and it is different from day to day so just take one day at a time and enjoy it while it lasts because before long this very special time will be over.

Good Luck!

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L.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

every baby is different - my three month old started sleeping from 10pm - 6am recently (i had about a week of sleepness nights because i had to keep his cradle rocking if he would wake up). but he is fine now, and sleeping through night.
you may want to try modifying his eating schedule so that he eats around 10-11, then he should make it to 3-4, then around 6-7. This way you are only waking up once in teh middle of the night. I got my baby on this schedule for a bit before i transitioned him to 10pm - 6am.
I would really not recommend the rice cereal - it is far to early for babies to have that in their digestive system - unless of course your pediatrician said it was ok, which i would be surprised by. Most pediatrians recommend waiting until they are 5-6 months.

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E.N.

answers from San Diego on

I followed the Babywise guidelines with my two babies, also. I think the key to the unbroken nightime sleep is being sure they get consistent feedings during the day. I think it is every 3 1/2-4 hours at his age.
By the time my babies were 3 mos, their nighttime schedule was something like this: feeding and bedtime at 7 pm, wake baby at 10:30-11pm for one more feeding before I went to bed, then my baby would sleep until about 6:30-7am. It was about 11-12 hours total, with one interruption. I then dropped that late night feeding at about 4-5 months old.
I would suggest moving up his bedtime (but that will probably start the day a little earlier, too, so you have to consider if that will work for you). Whatever you do, if you have about 3 hours between his bedtime and your bedtime, wake him and feed him before you go to bed. This may give you more unbroken sleep to start the night. Also, when he does wake in the night, don't go to him immediately. See if he can settle himself back to sleep - he may be waking out of habit. But you may know by his cry whether he is going to settle himself or not. I could usually tell immediately by the sound of my babies' cry at this age if they really needed a feeding or if they were just disturbed in their sleep. If you're not convinced he is crying out of hunger, give him 5-10 minutes (or whatever you are comfortable with) to see if he can settle himself back to sleep. Try this with one of the middle of the night feedings for a few days or a week and you may be able to get him down to only one nighttime feeding.
As far as the rice cereal goes, I tried it with my first baby - it didn't make a bit of difference, and then my midwife told me that their stomaches are not mature enough to digest that kind of food yet, so I gave up. The key for us was implementing that late night feeding before I went to bed. I hope this helps!

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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Sounds like you have a normal baby who is listening to his body.

My kids ALL 100% breastfed:
#1 ate every 1.5-2 hours all day and night long.
#2 would sleep through 5 let downs during the day, but eat all night.
#3 (almost 7 weeks old currently) eats at 7pm, then again at 11pm or midnight and then again at 5am or 6am.

I would be cautious of adding grains so soon - even though it can extend the sleeping time....in also can increase the risk of diabetes...and grain sensitivities.

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R.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

K.,

I agree with everyone's posts. And to give you one more example, I have 3 mo old twins. One is bigger than the other. The bigger one sleeps 8pm - 6am, but the smaller one wakes to feed at night because he NEEDS the food. I put them to bed at 8 and let them do their thing. I don't wake them up because at this age they can wake up when they need to, but when a baby is ready he/she will sleep. Also, I've had a few people tell me to add cereal to the baby's milk, but in my heart I really do feel like they are too young for that. They will be eating for the rest of their lives, but right now they need b.milk or formula. Can you add one more feeding at 11 pm? that may help get him more during the day. It can be a dream feed?

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V.A.

answers from Santa Barbara on

Hi K.,

There are no shoulds with a baby. Be careful about giving him solid food so young - his stomach may not be ready to tolerate it. Don't have an agenda with a baby because they never follow it. Just relax and enjoy him. There will always be people who brag that their baby slept through the night at 3 months but don't let it bother you. Eventually, he'll sleep through the night. I personally think it's better for their little stomachs to have smaller meals more often than huge meals less often.

V.

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N.G.

answers from Visalia on

That seems pretty normal to me. He is only 3 months old. My babies didn't start sleep through the night for some time.
I always thought if you got a 4-6 hours sleep stretch you were doing good.
N.

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R.G.

answers from Honolulu on

Aloha, K.. First off, every baby is different. I have never heard of BabyWise. My baby was sleeping 8 hours at 2 months and 10-12 hours at 3 months. She still took 2 naps during the day. My mother and mother-in-law did not believe me until my mother and father came to visit and stayed with us and they witnessed it. I know someone mentioned that her bigger child slept longer than her smaller child. I don't know if that makes a difference as my daugher was 4 1/2 pounds when she was born. When I spoke with other mothers at a family reunion, the only thing that I had done differently was the feeding schedule. I had read, in a few different publications, that usually they wake up at night in the beginning because they are still hungry. I stuck with nursing my baby every 1.5-2 hours and did not change that until she was sleeping through the night. Let me tell you that was a pain. Only when she was sleeping through the night did I start to extend the time between feedings. Hope this helps.

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A.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

YAY! I am so sorry I am late with this advice, but after reading your response I see that so many others gave you great advice!

My 1st thought was to tell you to steer clear of Babywise. I read the book, but thankfully never tried any of their concepts. The book wanted me to enforce a strict schedule and let my baby CRY IT OUT. I am 100% against that idea and immediately threw the book away. I didn't even want to give it to a friend because I would NEVER suggest any of the ideas in that book.

Good for you for going with the flow and following your babies cues!!!! You're doing an amazing job!!!!

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B.B.

answers from San Diego on

All babies are different. My sisters baby slept through the night from 6 weeks...but my baby still wanted to feed every 4 hours until 12 weeks. Right around the 3.5 month mark, she would extend her sleep for 7 hours at the first stretch and then another 5 before she woke up for the day. I don't think Baby Wise is very "wise". I read it and found it to be too rigid for a baby. Little ones need to trust that their parents can fullfill their needs and if they need or want to eat or cuddle a few times a night...then I think we should provide them that. They grow so quick. Enjoy your little one!

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L.A.

answers from San Diego on

Baby Wise is OUT OF ITS MIND!!! Babies were not designed to sleep through the night. They need to be fed. I have four kids, and all of them woke up every 2-3 hours for the first 7 months. That is normal. You do not want your baby to sleep through the night. He is awfully young for cereal, too. You are not a first time mommy. As you know, when there is a baby in the house, a good nights sleep is simply not a reality for mom. Enjoy the night feedings!!! They will not last forever.

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M.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

My two month old has a very similar feeding schedule. Only very lucky parents get babies who sleep for 11 hours straigt this early in the game! I'd say all is fine!

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M.R.

answers from Reno on

My baby is now almost 7 months and she still wakes up at least two times a night. She goes down about 8:30pm and is up the first time by 2 or 3. What I do is let her cry her self back to sleep which only take about 10 to 15 mins. She would eat if I went and got her, but I don't. I just listen for her to go back to sleep. Than she wakes up again about 5 or 6am and I get up and feed her and she goes back to sleep till about 7 or 8. When she was 3 months she slept with me so I just would feed her and she would go back to sleep. Well any way I would try not to worry about what someone or a book says and just do what is right for my baby and me. And to me it sounds like your baby is doing what is right for him. I did try the rice cereal because some told me that would help, but I don't think that is worked for her. I hope this helps.

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K.H.

answers from San Diego on

Sounds like a normal 3 month old!

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K.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Your three month old should be sleeping as much as he needs to or is able to at night. My son was still up every two hours when he was three months old - every baby has different sleep abilities and habits, you can't pin it down to a number of hours or a quality of sleep by reading a book... I tried.... As long as he is happy and growing, just do what works! :)

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