How Many Activities Should Kids Be In?

I wish more people lived like you. I still don't know why some people schedule every minute of every day.

Your son may have a tough time during the first week or two of Kindergarten depending on where you live and whether or not most children in your community attend preschool.

I would think that a summer rec program for him 1 or 2 days a week might be great! It will give him the chance to experience structured group activities in a fun setting- and it will give you a little time off.

I'm a proponent of having kids interact with other children (outside siblings) on a regular basis. It's really good for them to learn how to negotiate the social world. Having said that, at 3 swim lessons and maybe a play group is more than enough! My 3 yr old does a weekly group swim lesson year-round and a monthly toddler book club at our local library (also in preschool). For him, that's enough. I wouldn't enroll him in anything with any intensity unti 5 or 6.

You have plenty of time for extracurricular activities! If you feel your children need a "social" outlet, then by all means sign them up for a couple things. Usually programs offered through recreation departments are about 6 weeks long, so there's no long term investment. Maybe try a preschool ballet class or karate class and see how they like it. I believe in trying things to see what sparks my kids interests. Good luck!

I would only think that your son who's starting kindergarten may have a little bit of a hard time adjusting to school. It will take a week or two then he should pick it up. Not saying he will FOR SURE but if he's used to no structure all the time, then he's required to have ALL STRUCTURE for eight hours, that can be overwhelming. I think swimming is a good thing for them but also do suggest having him in a camp - maybe 1-2 days a week. It's my belief that kids do well when they have the chance to interact with kids outside of their brothers/sisters but also get the chance to learn how to listen and follow directions from other adults.

Hubby keeps our kids home during the weekend and they go to a friend's house on Friday. I just put my daughter in gymnastics (10 week session) and then will start her in dance in August (1 hour a week) and if she's still interested, will let her continue doing gymnastics (her best friend is in there so that is a huge motivator). If she was in daycare all day during the week, I would not be as interested in having her do something outside of the home.

I think playtime and family time is the most important but I also think that some kids enjoy doing activities/sports out of the home, even if they do not know to openly ask about it.

I personally think the least amount of activities at that age the better. As long as you are doing activities as a family, I think your kids will be just fine! I have friends who run themselves ragged trying to get their kids to this practice and that practice, and this game, and piano lessons, a dance, gymnastics, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The poor kids - they need down time too!! It makes me exhausted just thinking about it. I think there is a difference in going and doing stuff as a family all the time then the pressure of having to be at the practice, at the game, do good, don't mess up, WIN, WIN, WIN......even if you as a parent don't feel that way, a lot of parents do and it will affect your kids as well......

just my opinion......

I don't think you have to put kids in organized or structured activities. Family time is so important and I think it is better that you are having quality family time rather than shuttling the kids to one event after another. In my mind that isn't quality time.

When my son was young he wasn't in any activities. We were like you, doing more things as a family. He had play dates with friends, went to the park to play, and things like that, but nothing formal. When he was in junior high school he wanted to be involved in activities so that is what we did. He was in band, played football, basketball, ran track, and was in UIL. In high school he narrowed it down to what he was really interested in and is now only in football and does powerlifting. He'd like to be in track too, but it overlaps powerlifting which is his main sport, so he skips it.

I wouldn't worry about your kids not being in organized activities and just keep focusing on family. When they want to be into sports and such they will let you know.

You are doing just fine Mama! Don't worry! Generations of children turned out as successful adults without having their days filled with preschool or structured activities. It is a very new craze! We have had generations of geniuses, entrepreneurs, Presidents, inventors and famous musicians that never went to preschool or were involved in early development extra curricular activities. They don't really give kids an edge over others in the long run.

Your kids learn to negotiate and interact while working with eachother as siblings. They learn also while you are at the zoo,parks,museums,running errands etc. You have already provided so much enriching and nurturing in their little world. Kindergaten may be an eye opener but that is what it is for. I was a Kindergarten teacher before having kids. Kids in your boat turned out just fine...I saw some pretty burned out kids and parents that were in the other boat of structured everything.

As a previous Kindergarten teacher I chose not to put my kids in preschool. We chose to bring preschool to our home and our everyday living. I got together with other moms and we did preschool co ops using a curriculum. My older two are soooo social and excel in school. Our youngest is even more so and starts Kindergarten this coming Fall.

I would work with your son on sitting and doing a project for about 20 minutes at a time, work on holding a pencil and writing his name, recognizing his name, using scissors. You probably have done these things already but just in case. Actually the hardest thing for most boys in Kindergarten is all the sitting and being quiet for loooong stretches of time while working on worksheet after worksheet. But even the kids that had been in daycare since 6 weeks old and preschool had a hard time with this too!

Don't stress about the fact that you think you are doing a disservice cuz you are not doing what everyone else seems to be doing. There will be plenty of time for structured activities in their future. Take this time to talk about what they want to do and do it informally. When they ask to take a class then try it out. OUr oldest asked for drum lessons when he was 8...he pushed and pushed and we finally enrolled him. Turns out he is very gifted musically and loves music..it is his passion. THis is not something we would have naturally thought to enroll him in...but it is his gig and we support it...with earplugs!! Your kids will lead the way of what their passions are..just keep your eyes and ears open to what it might be...expose them to the arts and sports and they will make a choice. THen you can jump in with scheduling.

We also don't do a lot of structured activities and I think it's great. Some kids seem to be running around so much from one thing to another and their mothers are always stressed saying how busy it all is. But if your son has never been in anything except swimming, I'd likely sign him up for a little something this summer so he gets used to a structured class before K. Otherwise, school may be such a big change for him that it's a tougher transition than it has to be. Boys tend to have a harder time as it is doing things like circle time and if he's not used to it at all, he may not do well at least initially. If he's a quieter boy though who likes to sit and focus anyway, maybe not a problem at all.

Your kids are still very young. My kids weren't in any types of activities at that age at all, swimming lessons or otherwise. They are now almost 12 (son) & 10 years old (daughter) & I allow them each 1 instrument plus 1 activity per year. My son plays baseball & has for the last several years happily. This past year was my daughter's first dance class & we chose hip hop because it was offered only once per week which is just right for her. I don't think it helps anyone to over-schedule your kids because they're left without any time to actually BE kids and just hang out with their friends, play outside, ride bikes, etc. You have the whole rest of your life to run around and over-schedule yourself if you want to, right?

Our family is the same way. I really think that lots of kids are so overscheduled these days that they never get a chance to enjoy their childhood. There is plenty of time for them to be in sports and activities; I think it's great that you spend so much time together as a family, because those are the memories that they will really treasure. I think you should continue to make that a priority, and wait until they are at least a couple of years older before putting them in activities that take up all their free time.

I think your son will be fine. He may need time to adjust, but kids at that age are very adaptable and kindergarten is a fun place where they get to do lots of activities. I'm sure he will learn quickly. Good luck, and keep having fun with your family! :-)

When my sks were really young we didn't have them in dance or whatever. SD did chorus in school and band later and they both did a lot in HS. I think that if they don't have a keen interest at 3 and 5 that they'll be better when there is something that interests them vs doing something for doing's sake. Save your $ and time. Also, when they do get into school clubs and such, limit the number. We held the kids to one major activity at a time in Middle School and more in HS, but only if they kept their grades up. So while SS played two sports, one was fall and one was winter. And if they started, they had to finish unless there was extenuating circumstances. SD quit a lot of things, but she always finished the session she was in at the time.

With my almost-3 yr old, we do community things - today we went to a kiddie concert in the park and had a picnic with friends. The rest of the day will be laid back. Some books. Maybe a little baking when her sister comes home. Some free play. Etc.

You are doing fine! Kids will have all the structure they can handle when they get older.
We are only in what the kids want to do which right now is nothing! In the fall the boys want to play junior football(12 & 10 years old). They only get sports if grades are good. My daughter is finishing up tumbling once a week this week then we will have to see where it goes from there. As far as summer goes we don't do camps we play outside, go swimming or whatever they come up with. If they are bored it is their own fault. We tell them all the time to use the brain the good Lord gave them and invent something!

My kids are 15 and 12. Every year they have the choice of choosing ONE activity. We too spend a lot of time together. We cook together, we shop together and we play together. They are only young for a short time. My husband and I have decided to enjoy them.
With one activity each we can each take one and no one gets left behind.
Don't rush anything. Enjoy their time.
and please, make a decision now that you will remain an active family. Stay close, enjoy each others company and you will raise two amazing children.

B.
Family Success Coach