How to Change Nap Habbits

One, don't let her fall asleep at 5:00 or 6:00. She might be grumpy and whiny, but she'll never get on an early bed time schedule falling asleep at that time.

Another suggestion, eat dinner before 9:00. Eating that late is very hard on your body, and also keeps you AWAKE. Eat dinner when your husband gets home, then he can do his work. By the time you're done with dinner, you can get your daughter in a bath, and she'll be ready for bed much earlier.

You're the parent - so what if she doesn't like the way you want to do things? You're the boss, and you have to make the rules and the schedules.

Your daughter simply isn't getting enough sleep. This is one of those times that you just have to be the mom and make her go to bed. If we were in Europe, you could let her sleep late in the afternoon and go to bed later. However, in this situation, she's starting school and will NEED to be rested in order to be well adjusted at school.

Try moving her bedtime earlier in small increments like 15-20 minutes. Tonight, instead of 11, shoot for 10:40 PM. Don't ask her if she wants to go to bed, TELL her it's time for bed and then give her another choice like picking which pajamas she wants to wear or which story she'd like you to read.

Don't back down. Be kind and firm. She'll probably argue at first but once she realizes you're serious, she'll give in. You'll be amazed how much better she'll feel when she's getting more sleep.

Remember, the more you get her to sleep, the better and easier she'll sleep and the easier she'll be to handle during the day.

You can do it!

M.

I urge you to buy the book called, Healthy Sleep habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth.He is an MD and a professional in the area of sleep. You will be surprised how sleep deprived your child is, and her time clock is off in the am as a result. The nap at 5-6 pm should not happen at all and just push her through for an early dinner and bath and to bed.The crash nap is throwing the bedtime routine off. You will have to focus for a week or two on landing an early bedtime, but if you focus it can be done. She will be more tired as she adjusts to the new schedule, but you need direction, since you are somewhat solo. You want to understand the sleep cycle, especially since baby #2 will arrive. Sleep is just as important as what your child eats. I strongly suggest you get the book. The problem about sleep is that it can turn into BIG problems later with ADHD, HYperactivity, and behavior issues at school. The Kindergarten year is totally different than when us parents went to school. It's a 7-8 hour day.

Get the book~

I don't see any way out of changing your schedule. If you eat at 6:30 when your husband comes home, she could go to bed by 9pm. Then she could get up when you do and play until you have the breakfast and lunches ready. Good luck!

I have a 3-1/2 year old son who fights us also. However, we don't give him a choice. He screams, throws fits, the whole nine yards. If we put him in his bed to try to read him a book sometimes he fights us. We are not mean people but what I have found is to say "ok we'll leave you alone" and shut the door. Then he stops and cries out- we are actually right outside of the door waiting for him to calm down. THen we go in and have him choose a book or two and all is fine most of the time. Sometimes he fights at the end and we just turn on his bed time music, hug and kiss him, turn off the lights and leave. After about 5-10 minutes he'll settle down. I will share to you that my son is in a special program because his speach and some development is delayed so we have a special case. Moving on... Don't get offended but you need to make dinner time aroung 6:30 when your husband gets home that way you finish your meal about 7:30pm. Then immediately put her in the bath. She should be done at 8 pm. Start putting her to bed then. On a good night she'll start settling down around 8:30, bad nights 9. Whatever you do DO NOT let her choose her bed time. Remember that you are in charge not her and kids need to know that. Especially at this age when they push boundaries. It'll be hard to change habits and will take time but do not give up. That would be the worst thing because then she knows that if she screams loud enough she'll get her way. If you start feeling bad- remember that you are doing this because you love her and want to give her structure. DO NOT let her do stimulating things before bed- no tv no video games. Turn off everything once dinner starts and leave it off. Now you won't be able to do all these suggestions in one night so start with baby steps. I would start with the tv and video games. I hope this helps. Both my husband and I work. I have to be in bed 8-8:30. I wake up around 5:30 so we set his bed time for that time. I sympathize with you because raising kids is hard and demanding and they don't come out with instruction manuals.

First of all, you kind of shot yourself in the foot when you let her get away with such a loopy sleep schedule. It's not too late but you are going to have to be willing to be the "bad guy/enforcer" for awhile (which it sounds like you were unwilling to be earlier). Start with an earlier dinner (5:00 or 6:00...7:00 at the latest). Pick a resonable hour to enforce bedtime (9:00 at my house) and just put your foot down! Even if she lays in bed reading or something...as long as she starts to get the idea that 9:00 means I have to be in bed and I don't get to do anything else. Get a good bedtime routine in place to help communicate this. At our house we have bathes, read a story, say prayers, and then it's everyone in bed.

Check out my website (www.mytimecalendars.com) for some help setting up a predictable routine that your 4year old can anticipate and follow. We use pictures and graphics that you can customize to fit your daughters interests and schedule so she doesn't have to be a great reader to use our calendars and charts. You can set up an evening chore chart for her as well as a calendar for her to predict her daily routine and set up a reward system that works for you and your daughter...make it fun and you'll have feet nights where you have to be the bad guy. But don't kid yourself...it's going to be a bit of a battle to make this schedule change but stick to your guns and don't give up - you can do it! Word to the wise with your next baby...start the bedtime routine as early as 7 months and you will avoid a repeat of this struggle!

As the director of a preschool program I can assure you that you not the only parent who is facing the challenge of shifting their child's routine to be successful in school. Remember you cannot change everything all at once. However, I think you'll find if you focus on bedtime, everything else will fall into place.

An evening bath is a strength for a child who does not go down well. It can become the start of a strong and lasting bedtime routine. However it needs to be supported by a household routine shift that communicates that it is time to slow down and go to sleep. You might turn off the televisions in your household during the time between bath and tuck in. You might read a story. Have her bathe, put on her pajamas, brush her teeth and its time for story either in a favorite chair or better yet, her in her bed.
Give her warnings for her final drink of water and potty and all the other excuses when story is over, tuck her in and tell her goodnight.

Each time she rises, gently guide her back to bed and tuck her in and tell her goodnight.

It will take time. There will be times when you are frustrated. She'll not go to sleep immediately but eventually her body will adjust.

Mornings can be a challenge when you have a tired child. A couple of things to remember. Don't make it a battle. Set some guidelines such as if she hasn't brushed her teeth or gotten dressed or combed her hair she gets in the car anyway. Let the teachers know you are changing routines, they'll support your efforts and come up with other ideas that will help you get her routine balanced.

Good luck.

I would work to put both of you on a schedule. I would not let her sleep in the evening even if she has not had a nap, if she is tired I would put her to bed at 7:30pm-8pm.. Have some quiet time after dinner, Read books, take a bath and go to bed and do the same thing every night so she knows the routine. If you can get her to go to bed early than you can have some time to yourself to relax and go to bed at a decent hour so that you are not so tired. Talk about her day and let her know that she needs the sleep and mommy does too. If she can not sleep, let her lay in bed, eventually she will fall asleep. Going to school will wear her out, she needs sleep.. If you are at home, Make sure the rest time is the same time as at school, if she can not sleep than have her play quietly by herself, if she is tired, she will go to sleep. Its hard to break that habit but you can do it. Just stay on a schedule and she will get used to it. It may be hard at first but once she gets in the routine and you stick with it, you all will get more rest... Hang in there!

Hello,

You need to get her on a Schedule and you may need to change how you do things if you want her to go to bed earlier and get up earlier in the morning. You have to scarifice things when you have kids.

I guess I don't understand why you eat at 9:00pm?? That is so late and not healthy at all. I would have dinner ready for when you husband gets home and you all eat then. Then you can start the bedtime routine. Everyone needs to adjust their schedule for this to work.

At all possible, don't let her take a nap between 5:00 - 6:00pm. She will get cranky and fussy but tell her she has to stay awake. Find something for her to do or even help you out in the kitchen. That is why she is going to bed so late.

Bedtime should be 8:00 - 8:30pm and no later. Our daughter was in bed at this time every night until she was a Freshmen in High School. Kids need their rest and plenty of it.

It will be hard at first but start around 7:00pm by giving her a bath and then maybe letting her watch something for 20-30 minutes and then off to bed. Read a book every night when she gets in bed. Start something cool for bedtime. Make it cool to go to bed.

Good Luck

Routine routine routine. I had the same problem with my 5 year old and it has taken us a long time to finally get her to go to bed around 8 or 8:30 PM. These are just suggestions and please know that every child is different. What worked for us is my daughter can watch one program while I make her dinner, she eats dinner, we then play until bath time at 7:30PM. We put on our pajamas and brush our teeth then it is quiet time either putting a puzzle together or reading a book. Make sure she does not go back downstairs. I also found that laying or sitting down next to her in bed for a few minutes to discuss her day makes a huge difference. I leave her room no later than 8:15. Napping in the early evening needs to be eliminated, you may have a power napper on your hands. Also, TV and video games too close to bed stimulate my daughter and she gets even more energy. You also need to integrate your husband spending time with her. Most of the time kids stay up to spend time with their parents and truthfully it will only get worse when you have a second child. Also you need to stick with a routine for at least 3 weeks. If after 3 weeks it just isn't work try something new. Keep in mind it may work one night but not the next. Do your best to stick with it.

I completely agree with the previous 2 posts. You know what is best for your daughter, and you want her to get to bed early because you love her. She will be much happier with an appropriate amount of sleep, and will get used to going to bed earlier. The only thing I have to add is that I have found that packing lunches the night before is a HUGE timesaver...I am much more efficient when I'm not worried about getting my daughter ready. I try to get things ready for breakfast as well (but am not as vigilant about that). I do lay out my daughter's clothes as well, so I don't have to think in the morning =).

Best of luck!!! I will be interested to hear how everything goes!!!