I am a military wife of 12 years. At 11 years, we realized that we had been apart 8 1/2 of it. A month together here, 3 months there, 2 weeks here and there, added up to the 2 1/2 we were actually together.
Let me tell you something, I used to be the frantic mom, clothes strewn through the house, dishes piled up to the point that I had to wash some for us to eat supper with (sounds horrible, I know) because I couldn't get it all done. I work full time, go to school full time, take care of a 5 and 9 yr old, a house (and I used to take care of my two elderly grandparents also). I was stressed, and even though I had family near, I was caring for them.
At what I thought was going to be the break of a marriage for it (screaming at the kids almost, screaming at my husband for being gone--when it wasn't his fault, and just utterly overwhelmed), he came home early one time, and we moved.
He was home almost 8 months WOW!!!!!! YEAH!!!! and when he got shipping orders to Iraq again, I just made a decision that it was going to be different. NO MATTER WHAT. I know it sounds corny, and I never believed that "telling" yourself that "it's not bad", and CHOOSING to look at something positive instead of negative would EVER work for me, or anyone else for that matter. I MADE the decision to find something good instead of bad in everything. If I couldnt' find it in that EXACT situation, I would find something near it to be happy about. For example, instead of stressing about the laundry and the mess, I would stop all working and actually WATCH my kids play... the looks on their faces, actually just watching them be kids, made the rest of the stress melt away. As long as they aren't malnourished (which I'm sure they are NOT) and as long as they are not living in filth (which I'm sure they are not) and as long as you are not yelling your head off at them (which I used to be before I started doing this), it will all be OK. I promise. You have to WANT to be that person that holds it all together. You have to WANT to change your outlook on every situation that gets thrown your way. And most of all, you have to find the LITTLE THINGS in everything around you, let those LITTLE THINGS fill your jar, and there won't be anymore room for the stress. I KNOW that sounds corny and impossible, but I was almost committed once for my anxiety/stress/bi-polar tendencies, and I didn't believe it was possible. But I promise you, from the bottom of my heart, that if you just choose to look at the kids playing instead of the pile of laundry (even if it has to be on the table--HEY you are watching them that they don't get hurt LOL), or pick flowers with them on a walk instead of looking at the carpet, take a bad situation, deal with it, refuse to dwell on it, and find something happy to think about, your life will be so different.
The suggestions of cooking ahead of time adn freezing it are wonderful. I dont' know the type of food you feed your family, but I have many simple (large) non time consuming recipies that feed many, and make multiple meals with each time you fix it. If you would like to know, message me, adn Ill be happy to help.
Best of luck....sorry it's so long though!