How to Stop Baby's Food-tossing Behavior

Our daughter, now 26 months, did a bit of this too - her favorite was to toss her sippy cup :).

We gathered after a bit that this really only happened when she was full, or just bored and done eating. So, we would just say 'uh-oh!' and immediately remove the food/cup to end the meal. She persisted for a little while, but then the behavior gradually tapered off until she wasn't doing it anymore.

Maybe you could try this with a natural consequences approach. The next time she drops her food on the floor, you would say, "Oh, it looks like you're done eating." Then, do your regular after meal routine of cleaning her up, and take her out of her high chair. She probably will get upset. You remain calm and at the same time empathetic. If she says she's still hungry, let her know sincerely that you sympathize. Then tell her that food doesn't go on the floor, and if she drops it there it means she doesn't want to eat. Let her know that the next meal, or snack, will be in a couple of hours. Wait until the normal snack or meal time before giving her more food. If she cries or whines about being hungry, continue to be empathetic, but stick to the message that food doesn't go on the floor. She probably will test you on this at the next meal (or meals), to see if you really mean it. She won't harm herself if she misses part of her meals. And you're not being mean or punitive, but just letting her experience natural consequences for her behavior. This is a technique from Parenting With Love and Logic, a wonderful tool for parenting children of all ages. I think the library probably has copies of the books. Local school counselors teach Love and Logic classes regularly in the schools. The cost is reasonable, and the information invaluable. Good luck.

hi thought i'd share what worked for me my lil one kept it up for a few weeks and one day i saw a baby seat that connects directly to the table now honestly me being the one cleaning all those messes i wasnt too hype on the idea but felt it couldnt hurt to try and dinner that night i was all prepared for a food fight episode and dont you know she only pushed her plate aaway when done i was flabbergasted but 3 kids later i feel its partly being moved to the big kid table...lol...being more involved with the family dinner time and watching and/or copying our behaviors. best of luck with that let me know how its going...

I have a 16-month-old who does exactly the same thing, and we just take it as her indication that she's done with the meal. I'm sure when she has the language to tell us she's done, it will subside. Until then, I'm not going to worry about it much. :-)

I think this behavior is pretty much normal at this age. I'd put a towel or plastic sheet under her high chair so that the clean up is easy.

If you want to stop the behavior now. then taking the food away from her with the first bite to hit the floor should help. She is testing her environment. Perhaps she's bored, no longer hungry, likes to watch it fall, etc. She's also testing to see what happens when she puts food on the floor. When you take away the food you are telling her that this is not acceptable. Gradually she'll believe you and quit. Keep mealtime pleasant. Don't scold or even necessarily make a comment. Just take away the food. If it turns out she is still hungry, wait and hour or so and give her a snack.

Hi K.,

According to all of the literature I have read, food tossing is normal toddler behavior.

My advice? Let her have fun until she is old enough for you and your husband to explain that wasting food is a bad idea.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do, or not do, in regards to food tossing.

My son did that when he was about that age. We took all the food off his tray and when we were all done eating he had to get down and clean it up. He didn't really care for that because when he got down he wanted to go play. But he had to clean up first. It seemed to work for him.

Hi K.! Our 11 month son used to do the same thing as well as pitching the food right at us. I started to flick his hand when he did it and told him "we do not throw food." It worked pretty quickly. He still occassionally will drop food on the floor, but then immediately looks at me with a look of "uh, oh!" Then he doesn't do it again.

Of course, not everyone wants to resort to "pain" techniques. It's just a short but firm flick.

Good luck!

PS - is she at an age where she can choose what foods she wants to eat? Maybe that will help...I'm sure you already thought of that....

K.-
It sounds like part of your daughters personality is Ms. Neat. If she doesn't want something or is done with it she 'cleans' it off so she sees the clean surface. I have a 20month old girl, yours is just a bit younger, but try noticing when she first starts to 'clean-up' and do it for her. I would say "Are you all done with that? I will help you clean-up". She will not understand exactly now, but she will after several times. Ask- "All Done?" "Clean-up?" She will start to tell you then you won't have to wonder.
My second son who is now 5 was a lot like this and still is- loves his hands clean, anyway I had to purchase a plastic mat for under his high-chair. It was a pain to clean at first, but better that than nice flooring. He got the picture after a few months, I used to take his tray off if he got too crazy, and he understood.
Hope this helps.

Try sign language it works in daycare. This isn't a quick fix but consistency is key.

What I have always done once the food dropping or tossing begins is to remove the child from the table and let them know that once that behavior starts, that means the meal is over. Eventually they will get the message. I wouldn't be punitive about it, just say "all done" and remove them from the table.
Don't worry about her starving. If she's hungry she'll figure out pretty quickly to eat without dropping or tossing food.

just say "no" not over dramatic but firm and give a little flick on the hand AS she does it.
My 10 month old now looks at me to see if the rules are the same today and holds his food over the edge all I have to do is say "no" and he pulls it back on his tray and thats the end of it. He never cried when I flicked his hand it wasn't even that hard of a flick, just a little negative reinforcement goes a long way!
She understands WAY more than you are giving her credit for! You can have more adult conversations with her than you are having she gets it!
Good Luck!

You gotta catch her in the act! And tell her a firm no. I watch a 15 month old and it has been working.

This is how I worked it out with my child and others.
At first I placed a suction cup bowl to the side of the tray for her to place the unwanted items in. That worked for a while. The next approach was to use the ....discarding food as the signal for taking all of the food away because that means you are done with eating. If there is protest then restate the rule which is "food is for eating and sharing". Or "if you want to throw things from your chair then I will get you something for that job". Be sure to have some soft items, rolled up socks work well, to pitch into an empty pot. In between eating and congrats on making the socks go in the pot, you will be able to eat.
Everything in the world has a role or job, I tell children. Maybe she just likes the way gravity works. There are ways to do that without getting food off task or being harsh.

I also have a little one who was doing this. Thinking this was a behavioral problem I spoke with a friend of mind who has been in the educational areana (15 years-special ed. dept.). She says mainly that this is a developmental thing - that the child is discovering what is "self" and what is not. It is normal; definitly don't punish. Just offer a smaller amt. of food and when she's done take her plate away (she may also be trying trying to tell you that she is full/finished). She will eat when she is hungry...don't worry about her not getting enough. Good luck.

I have a 15 month old son who does it and read literature to take him down to clean it up then resume eating after cleaning his hands. He hates it. I still think both our babies are too young to get it until age two but I still do it to prep him. What has worked, is getting him to hand it to me and I say Thank you. Now he says thank you. Plus, whenever I want him to give me an item (food/rock/dirt,etc.) I hold my hand out and say Thank you and even if I'm far away he'll meet me half way to give it to me.

Hi !
I am a mother of 4 great boys, they range in age from almost 12, almost 10, almost 3 & 1.5 year old and all of my kids went through a stage of this. We have just made the rule that as soon as they start throwing, dropping, etc. Food from the high chair they are done, we take the tray off and tell them that if they threw food they are done eating...and this has alwasy worked, i found i had to be consistant and react as soon as the first piece of anything is dropped.
Sometimes, like for example with my middle son, he just wanted to be out of the high chair, as soon as we told him that if he was good and did not throw food we would let him sit in a booster seat at the table, but if he threw food that he wasn't ready to have " big boy" manners...
This always a good motivator...
Hope this helps...

This is a normal phase that will pass as your baby gets older. You could give her one firm (in your best grown up voice) NO! as she starts. Then use the "All Done" sign. Open hand wave. Repeat as she first starts to drop her food.
Go to the Dollar store and get a plastic table cloth to put under her chair at other people's houses. Borrow a dog to catch what she drops!

My daughter (now almost 2) went through a similar phase. One thing that helped was that we had a designated dish she could put things in that she didn't want, but she was a little older than your daughter when that trick worked. But I thought I'd throw that out there, just in case it might help. Good luck!

Just a little reassurance. . . my little girl who is now 26 months old, did the same thing around that age. It seemed to be a phase that passed. I just didn't make TOO big of a deal about it. As far as throwing other things around the house, she does do that, but I let her know that "toys are for playing with" and have her help me pick them up (works about 50% of the time). . . . hope that helps. Sometimes these little annoying phases just really get old, huh? I try to focus on the times during the day when she does something good. It seems to overshadow "naughty" behavior. Good luck.

Forget the speech...you could just try taking her out of her chair immediatly when she does it. Don't talk, just actions. She won't starve and she'll stop the behavior faster than you think. It's a perfect Love and Logic situation. My son had similar tendencies, but he just liked having the dog run to his side to clean it up. We started taking him out of his chair every time he did it. Tears a couple of times, but he never does it anymore. You may want to look into Love and Logic Magic by Jim and Charles Fay. Great reading and easy discipline techniques. Good luck...mol

I know this may sound harsh, but our son did the exact same thing, when he was that age (they understand so much, just can't express it). We told him that if he threw his food, he would be done with dinner. The next time he threw his food, we took away his dinner, saying in a calm nice voice: "Oh, you must not be hungry if you want to waste your food, so I'll go put your plate in the sink" He cried at the table (we gave him snacks one hour later), and continued to eat, with him watching. Within 3 days he had stoped the behavior.

My son did this too. I kept having him put it on my plate instead of the floor and eventually he learned to do that. Now he's 22 mos and most of the time just leaves the food on his plate if he doesn't want it.

I think you just need to be consistent in whatever method you choose and she will learn eventually. It seems to me that you're on the right track. Yelling or getting upset will only turn it into a game for her. I feel your pain though. I know it seems like forever, but it goes by fast! We tip the waiters a lot more when he's being messy :)

Good luck!

Hey K.-
I am new at this site.
I have a son that is almost 17months old too and he does the same thing when he doesnt want the food etc.. Trust me it will pass. Plus our dog stays at the highchair so it almost becomes a game!!
Just keep telling her no and putting the food onto the table or remove it from her reach.
She is basically trying to get a "rise" out of you and your husband and it is working-hahah-
Good luck
Jennifer T

Hi K.~ I remember with our first 10 years ago and our last just 3 years ago that we tried the feed yourself and had a lot of clean up. With my first I took all the food off the tray the first time he did it so he would not see me angry or frustrated but get the message we don't throw food. When he was about 2 and he thought it funny, I said no in a very stern voice and took the food away. Sometimes he would have a tantrum because all he wanted was more attention, mostly he wanted different food or was not hungry. Congrats on becoming MOM! Enjoy and good luck.
~A. N
mother of 3 boys (10, 9 and 3) married for 15 years and to the love of my life.

My son did the EXACT same thing!!! We did a few different things and they worked GREAT!

First, we taught him a way to tell us he is "all done". You can teach her the words if she speaks well, but we taught our son the sign (arms out to the sides with palms up). It was pretty natural, and he used it from the first day we taught him.

Second, any food he tossed on the floor is only picked up by him. When we get him down from the highchair, he has to pick up all the food he intentionally dropped. If he throws a fit and refuses, we sit him in time out (on the couch where he can't play) and try again in a minute or two. It has a few times taken a while, but it works.

The third thing we do is let him give us foods he doesn't like. I put his highchair next to our table and at the same height. On the table where he can reach it is a napkin that he can put whatever food really offends him. Otherwise, it WILL end up on the floor because he just can't handle it on his tray. Since the food is still within reach, he can grab it back and try it later if he chooses.

The last thing is once you see she is done, get her down or take away her food. Once my son is done eating, he tells us "all done", but if we ignore him, we have about 5 minutes until all food goes on the floor.

I totally feel your frustration. My 17 month old daughter has thrown food almost since day 1. We tried everything! She just thought everything was a game (slapping her hand, time-outs, making her pick it up, ignoring her, scolding her...).
Our time-outs seem to help and work like this: She drops something on the floor, we say, "uh oh! No thank you! Food stays on your tray! Do you need a time-out?" After the first warning we say, "uh oh! No food on the floor! Time out!" We take all the food off her tray, turn her around to face something boring (a wall, an empty room, etc.) and talk about what a bummer it is that she has to have a time-out (but don't engage with her). When she gets squirmy and frustrated or when it's been about a minute, we turn her back around and say, "time out over! Good job! NO throwing food on the floor, please! food stays on your tray, ok?" And that's it. We've done three time-outs at a meal before.
I think the key is to be consistent with your husband (especially since you work different shifts) and stick with something for awhile before trying something else.
Keep giving her just a few bites, and teach her to sign or tell you (all done, no thank you, etc.) if she's all done or doesn't like it. I also give our daughter a bowl in which to put the stuff she doesn't want. Putting stuff in a bowl is more fun than putting stuff on the floor. :) Sometimes in the process of putting things in the bowl, they find their way into her mouth. Sometimes i let her have a small toy on her tray. It seems to keep her distracted a bit. Or I offer her bites between her own bites so she doesn't have time to think about throwing stuff.
I know it's frustrating, but just keep trying different stuff (and new and interesting foods!).
One last thing...we've had lots of success with letting her "graze" between meals ("they" say it's healthier for toddlers, anyway). I put an ice-cube tray with different items in each cube on a little play-table and let her sit and snack whenever she's hungry. She'll leave it alone unless she's snacking from it (as long as I don't strap her in and make her sit there). This seems to be building better eating habits because she doesn't think to throw stuff on the floor when she can run off and play between snacks. She doesn't seem to be throwing as much, now when she's in the high chair. Sorry this is so long, I just have tried everything, too...so now you have all my ideas!

My oldest dtr, now 12, did that for months. I just kept consistantly telling her to leave it on the table or tray. It was very irritating. I put a small plate or bowl on the corner of her tray and tried to teach her to put the food in there if she didnt want it. I think she just stopped on her own after a while. To this day at 12 she still doesnt like things on her plate if she doesnt want it, at least now she is polite about it.

S. a

You stated the reason right up front yourself! She is trying to tell you, in her own way, that she is full, bored, or runed off by the food". All toddlers go through this. One of my daughers would actually throw her plate, so I quit giving her one until she was older.
You're on the right track by not making a big deal out of it. It's quite entertaining to them to watch an adult react to what they are doing.
With all my kids (I have 4) I would just nonchalantly say "OK, all done", wash them up, and take them out of the highchair and be done with it. There's no sense trying to reason with them. They don't get it at that age. If they are still hungry they learn very quickly that they better not throw their food. If they truely aren't hungry then they learn that you will respond to their need to be done and won't need to escalate the behavior into something worse.
I know you get tired of it. Believe me, I KNOW! I thought that stage would NEVER end. But after 27 years of being a parent that period was so very short. This will pass in a blink of the eye. I can now look back on stuff like this and realize, "Wow! He/she is a civilized adult! How cool!
Take a picture of her in the middle of the mess and in a couple of years you will be looking at it and thinking how cute it is! REALLY! You will!
The situation in the restaurant or at someone else's house is this: just place a couple bites at a time in front of her and take a sheet to put under the highchair (to protect your host's house so they will invite you back!). The VERY FIRST time she throws something she is DONE! Kids are very smart, she'll figure out really quick that that isn't working for her.
Hang in there, you're on the right track.
Good luck!

My daughter (16 months) does the SAME THING. What I do is to give her smaller portions, so there's less "ballast"...and I put one of those plastic office-chair mats down under her chair. If I don't feel like deep cleaning after her meal, I take her out of her highchair as soon as she starts to fingerpaint. (The fingerpainting usually is followed closely by the food tossing!) Hope that helps!

I have a son who is almost 15 months old and he does the same. It is a constant battle for me to remind myself that I need to keep my expectations of my son in line with his development. For now, when he starts throwing his food on the floor, I assume he is done, let him down and try again later. In my case, I honestly don't think he is ready to understand what I would be asking him to do/not to do.

I have a wonderful 20 month old who has done the same thing! She still does it, but not as often. I have found that she only does it when I am not right there, if she is lonely or bored with what she is eating. Part of it is due to the fact that she is a high need child who tends to really need you right there when she is eating, or doing anything else, and need that extra guidance of- The food is for putting in your mouth!, or- when you put that food on the floor, we have to pick it up together!- I find that eye contact during those simple statements is the key, and the simple repetition of being consistent with what you say each time, with your very personal attention making it clear that this is very important to you, and eventually with gentle and consistent guidance the child understands that, even if they don't get why, It is important to YOU, so they comply. We also have made sure to give her words to use to indicate when she is done- All Done!

So many kids go through this phase, you are no alone. Even though she seems young at 17 months, you need to take the whole tray, plate whatever away when she starts throwing the food. Try to stay calm and just ignore the tantrum, but do not give it back. Say, "If you are throwing your food, you must be done." Then take it away, maybe take her out or replace with a toy if you need her confined a little longer. Maybe she ends up with nothing for a spell, but she will learn quickly, hopefully. Good luck.

I am a mom of three, working 3/4 time. I have two with ADHD, so I understand the challenges. Take care.

Hi K.-
I see you have lots of advice already. I have a 19-month-old and we had this problem for awhile but it came to a stop when we did several things.
1. We began feeding her 4 meals a day. You know they need the food, but their attention span is short. When they toss food, they're done.
2. This is not conventional and may not work for you...but I am a firm believer that this is good for our immune systems. Just because it went on the floor doesn't mean she's rid of it. Within reason, we put it right back up on the tray. This requires a relatively clean floor.
3. Give her more to play with and more control...bowls to pour back and forth, spoons, etc. You can often put the food in when they are distracted by something they like to play with.
4. For variation, put lots of different kinds of nibbles into an ice cube tray. They won't finish it, but it holds their interest and you can save some for later snacking.
I hope this helps. Good luck. A.

Hi K.,

I would say if she is full and doing it just take the food away as soon as she starts to throw it overboard. If she is usually a good eater then you don't have to worry about her not getting enough even if she is doing it when she is bored. She will soon learn if she wants the food she shouldn't throw it or it will go away. This also means less mess to pick up. My 10 month old has started the same thing, but she does it to watch the dog eat her over board food. I have started taking the cheerios from her when she does it, but she is very small for her age so I can't just say feeding time is over. I need to make sure she is getting enough to eat. So I just take away what she is giving the dog at the moment and try to give her something else to eat. On those really trying days I do have to resort to one piece at a time eating or try feeding her something that requires me spoon feeding her so she won't just give it to the dog. Hope this helps, I will be reading other responses for some ideas as well since I have a similar problem.

If you figure it out can you let me know? *L* Mine is 2 1/2 and STILL does it. I have tried everything!!! I tried going from a high chair that he could pitch the whole tray off to a booster seat. Either way, its all thrown. Ive tried everything from firm no's to smacking hands. Nothing phases him.

My son does that sometimes too! I found that if I only put a couple of items on his tray at a time, he is less likely to through it. My fave is when he looks me in the eye, takes the item and let's go and then says, "UH OH!" Little booger. Have you tried using some utensils? Reeves likes to use his fork to feed himself now and we have a little less ending up on the floor. It has helped a bit. Other advice I have read says to just finish the meal when the food flies. It's hard though when you know that they haven't eaten much. Good luck to you! B. :)

Have you tried offering her a container to put the undesired food into or spread a vinyl table cloth below her chair. She may also be able to communicate with sign language if you learned some basics together.

Hi K.,
Our son did this around this age. We used the "food on the floor, your done" approach. It only took 1 or 2 times to figure out that if he put food on the floor he got down and was done eating. Also at this age, don't expect they will be able to sit down for much longer then 15-20 minutes to eat. Respect when she done she's ready to move on and have her tell you 'all done'.
good luck.