How to Stop My 13 Month Old from Hitting.

Kelly is absolutely right. My 16 month old started hitting a month or so ago. We tried telling him "no hitting" and "be nice/gentle" or "hands are for hugs". The only thing that made him understand that hitting was not a game was moving him away from whomever he was hitting. He quickly picked up on the fact that hitting meant the fun was over.

You've gotten some good advice here but I wanna caution you on placing a huge amount of emphasis on this as he is probably doing it for the reaction he gets from you & whoever he hits. Yes, be firm w/the 'no hitting' but also be short about it & then distract him. When our younger son went thru this phase, there were times I didn't even say anything to him about his hittng, just moved him to a different spot, engaged him in another activity & apologized myself to the parent &/or child. This is a phase that kids go thru....they like to see the reation of the person they hit as well as the adults around them. Best of luck!

Hi, M.,
You have gotten a lot of thoughtful responses. Don't worry about your child being a bully! THis is a normal phase that all children go through and more importantly, finish with!
As well as being stern and all the other advice that you have gotten from moms, the main thing to remember is that this is going to take serious repetition! Just keep doing what you are doing. They don't learn things overnight. It may take six months to learn. So you just have to keep saying the same thing over and over again. Also, you may, as an alternative, show him how he should be touching the dog or you, whenever he is hitting. Give him an alternative so he understands how to do it right, not just what he is doing wrong. This is a good way to approach most of child rearing. Whenever they do something wrong (as they grow older), instead of telling them it's wrong and leaving it at that, show them a good alternative. good luck! You will be fine...

Hi M.,

I understand your problem. He still thinks hitting is a game, as he has not been het. I AM NOT telling you to hit him back. What I would suggest is when he hits you, grab his hand(s) in yours forcefully and tell him emphatically "No, we do not hit. It hurts and we do not hit." Make sure to look straight in his eyes and have his attention. Personalize the message when he hits another either Mama or another person.

Hope this helps,
Patti b

M. -
You have gotten sone wonerful advice. I agree treat this with a serious stern response. You should make it very clear how this is not OK! You will not be the bully. Get the rest of the family on board and you will nip this in the bud!

A.

Hi M.!

Oh yeah! I remember this stage.........very normal, yet very frustrating!

I didn't treat it "seriously" at first, which was my first mistake. That's where the laughter came into play, then hitting others as well. Just like your son is doing.

Once I got "serious" with him, and used my "MOM VOICE" for one of the first times, then he knew I meant business. I tried to grab his hand either in mid-hit, or right after his hit to firmly tell him "NO, DO NOT HIT!!!" It took awhile, but he finally stopped hitting.

Then he moved on to throwing.......
Good Luck!

~N. :o)

Hello M.,
I bought my nephew a little punching bag, and explained to him that we only hit the punching bag not each other. He was so excited to tell his friends about his new punching bag, and then said to them, "ok so no more hitting me, hit my punching bag instead." So cute!! Anyways, it worked. Even when he got mad, he would go running into his room to punch his bag. So maybe pick out a stuffed toy to designate as the hitting toy. And make sure you make it fun. good luck. A. Z.

My daughter is 17 months and we are just ending this stage. I told everyone who babysat that there was NO LAUGHING when she hit, scratched, pinched, etc. Then, when she did it, I told her "No! Don't hit. Show mom gentle" Then I showed her how to touch gently on the face and she would copy me and I praised her. Then once she learned that, I just had to say "we don't do that, show mom gentle" even when she started to swing. It worked with many months of repitition. Also, I make sure I praise her when she is gentle without starting out rough so she doesn't think she has to start the process with a hit.

FYI: I noticed she did it more when she was tired.

Thank you for posting this, my 20-month old daughter has recently started hitting as well. She wll swipe at another baby's paci or face, and she does this to my nephew who is only 6 months.

Know you're not alone in this!!

A.