How to Talk to Your Husband That He Needs to Go to a Pro for a Haircut

I love all these responses! I like the idea of you doing the reserach and even scouting out places, and then even GOING with him. My husband had the same person cut his hair for years and when she moved, he was kind of "lost" and still hasn't found a place he feels comfortable walking into. He waits forever between haircuts because I think he's just doesn't like going.

I think finding someone he feels comfortable with is key - maybe even poll his friends or something. Using some of the tactics others mentioned - gently saying you think he'd look more professional if someone cut his hair - might be a start to get him there. Hopefully he'll feel much better about himself once the initial haircut is done and keep it up!

My husband actually cuts his own hair with clippers (never scissors) and it actually comes out better then when he goes to sports clips. Can you buy him a set of clippers and help him out? I think honesty is the best policy here. If you give him a gift certificate he might not use it. He may have some hidden fear of getting his haircut or just not want to take the time or spend the money.

Another option is find a hairdresser that comes to the house and get the ENTIRE family hair cut on that day. Just a thought. Good luck!

I'm also a fan of the gift card idea. I got my husband a gift card to a local mens-only salon and he now goes there regularly! I don't know where you live, but the place he goes to is Halo for Men. It's a bit pricey for a guys cut, but they do a pretty good job and I think they may even serve the guys a beer (added incentive!). As a backup plan could you help him cut his hair? Not ideal, I know, but maybe trim the bits he misses? Good luck!

A few words on how to handle touchy subjects. Start by giving a little warning, "I need to talk to you about something and you may not feel comfortable hearing it, but it is important." (By now he thinks you're having an affair and is relieved that it is only about his hair) Then some talk about how he sees things to show that you respect his feelings and perspective. "Your mother and you have saved a lot of money over the years cutting your hair. Maybe you are proud of the fact that you can do this yourself. Honey, you are a nice looking man and you have a professional position in life. Things are not the same for us as they were for you growing up, our world has changed, people pay so much attention to how they look now. We really can afford for you to go to the barber and the one at (recommend one and have the address, directions ready, so he doesn't have to put forth any effort in this regard) is probably just fine. Won't you please think about going there this Saturday? It would make me prouder of you if you had your hair done professionally." Watch his reactions, speak slowly and stop if he starts to boil and ask what he is thinking. Reflect his feelings back to him after he responds, "You seem to be embarassed by this..." or "What should I understand your silence to mean?" or "You seem interested in this idea" Good luck.

You've been married to him long enough you are the best friend that needs to tell him that he's doing a crappy job BOTTOM LINE. If that hurts his felings he'll get over it with his new hair cut.

Get him a gift card/certificate and tell him to treat himself.

I would suggest buying him a gift certificate to a men's salon as a gift for a birthday or father's day and add a massage or some other service so that he isn't insulted by the haircut portion of the gift. You can say you wanted him to be pampered because he works sooo hard and deserves a day of rest and relaxation. If he protests about the haircut you can say you thought he would enjoy someone else taking care of him for once even though he has done such a great job on his own it might be nice to give someone else the responsiblity. (ego stroking!) I know most men might be reluctant to go to a foo-foo salon but it's worth a try. Plus you can add the fact that the gift certificate is non-refundable and you know he wouldn't want to waste your hard earned money. And it would hurt you feelings if he didn't like your gift that you thought long and hard about. You can research salons in your area on the internet that cater just to men. Maybe, just maybe, if he falls for it, he may see that the professional haircut isn't so bad and it might be easier to encourage him to go back when it is time.

Good luck,
S.

Hi H.,

It's nice that you're trying to be gentle about it. Just ask him to do you a favor. Tell him that his haircut isn't looking 'right' these days and that you'd appreciate him doing this for you. Or...you could ask him to go with you when you get your hair done ...and that it would fun to go together. That may be a subtle way of getting his haircut at the same time. Unless there are cost issues and he's wanting to save money. Do you have a friend that cuts hair? Maybe she needs practice cutting men's hair and he could 'help out' by being her guinea pig. Or, (just being funny) hide all the scizzors and clippers and he'll have to go to the barber :o)!

Good luck, A.

OK, now that I'm done laughing (with you not at you). Have you ever tried getting a gift certificate to a barbershop? Your salon may be a little too feminine for him, especially since he's never gone to a professional before. Even one of the chain places would be a better fit for him. Maybe on his next birthday, anniversary or make up a day, you could get a sitter, take him to lunch and go get the haircut.

Good Morning
Father Day is coming up buy him a gift certificate, or just because @ a place where they will groom him and cut it to a style once this happens, I think he would continue to go on his own.
Good Luck.

If I were you, I would kind of joke about it. Tell him in a humerous way he needs a professional haircut. Maybe if you make light of it, he won't fee self conscious.

A.
Our mommy works from home. Ask me how!

Get him a gift card to a salon for a haircut. Maybe he'll get the hint?

I would get him a gift certificate to a salon like Sport Clips. It is a guys salon with sports on every tv and sports memorabilia on the walls... very fun place! You could do the whole MVP package- haircut, shampoo with scalp massage, hot towel on the face and pressure points massaged and also a mini massage on the back with one of those hand held massagers. Buy it for him and tell him it is your way of thanking him for all he does for the family and that you feel he deserves a bit of pampering for himself.

Another option is to buy him something like a wax or fiber for his hair to wear it sloppy so it looks like it was meant to be that way and not just his lack of hair cutting skills :)

I really wish you lots of luck since I know how hard it is to get them to go to a salon! Let us know how it turns out and what you did! Blessings to you all!

You could give him a choice. "Hon, would like your next haircut at Sports Clips or the barbershop where so and so gets his hair cut." Just kidding...he might notice the mommy psychology.

I think the gift card thing could be too soft of an approach and it might just be a frustrating waste of money.

I say keep is simple, honest, play up the sex appeal thing, and reward him appropriately when he comes home with his new do. You want him to associate good things with his new haircut so he'll be motivated to change his haircut habit permanently. :>)

Hi H..
Your request initially made me laugh. Here's what I would do...Why dont you mention how much you like hi shair when it is cut and tell him that teh local haircuttery, supercuts, etc is running a deal for only blank amount of money. Tell him you think he looks great when his hair is cute a certain way. Good luck. I understand that a man's ego can be very delicate!

Hi H., I was a hairdresser for over 35 years and I hate cutting my own hair and I know what I'm doing!!!! Your dear husband must have been a hair stylist in his other life. You must have told him his hair doesn't look right or something to that affect. Maybe he has a thing against someone putting their hands on his head. Whatever the reason, it is, that makes him cut his own hair, after 10 years it shouldn't be a mystery to you. My husband has almost no hair, but he always want's me to cut his hair for him. I would love to see him shaved completely bald, but he says NO! All I can do is give him a nice cut the way I've been doing it for atleast 29 years now. I thought women were picky, but men are worse. I hope that one of these days you won't let his haircuts upset you anymore and just love him for the way he looks. he still has hair and that's more than a lot of people on this earth can say. God bless you always, Love Jo

I had fun reading this and some of the responses. My husband always cuts his own hair. Once in a while he'll go to a hair place. Typically he will use the clippers, and then I'll go over it to get the strays and do his neck. He finishes up around his sideburn area.
If your husband likes to do it himself, then maybe he'd be up for using clippers. We went to sally beauty supply after going through about 4 cheap sets from walmart. So far, so good.
My dh has a sense of humor about such things, so I agree with pp and would just tell him you look like a goof. It wouldn't hurt to tell him he doesn't have to do it himself, but if he wants to, he needs a better technique.

This was definitely the funniest request ever!! I'm just dying to see a picture of your husband, because the picture I have in my mind is hysterical! It can't be THAT bad, can it? I say, be as light as possible about it. Even though you are obviously close, having been married for a good amount of time - he could be real sensitive. Sometimes my husband critiques my wardrobe and he does it so humorously and in a totally kind way - but I still get mad!

Tell him if he gets his haircut you'll wear a cheerleader outfit. :)

LOL...that is so funny but I know it is not to you. I like the ideas about a gift card but my concern is even if he does go will he understand why he is going and keep going. I think that honesty is the best policy and there is a tactful way to say everything.

I think that maybe a presentation of a gift card to a Sport Clips and a non attacking, loving explanation as to why you are giving it to him. Encourage him to give it a try and then major praise when he gets home looking like a stud!

Good Luck!

H., I would have someone close to your family give him a gift card to the local salon. A lot of the schools are selling gift cards now at least the catholic schools do and so do a lot of public schools do the script card program. the school gets a portion of the money from it so its a win win. good luck. men are as weird as women about their haircuts. i was so glad when mine finally gave up on trying to cover the rededing part and just got it trimmed up short.

I don't think my husband would take a "hint" very well, most men aren't that intuitive (part of their nature). I'm also not sure about the giftcard idea- it may be taken as more of an insult to his skills and trying to do what his frugal mom always did instead of a "suggestion."
I would try to be as positive as possible- tell your husband you'd like to talk with him about something that isn't a huge deal in most people's eyes, but it's been something that's become more important to you in recent months. Tell him that as much as you appreciate how much money he's saved your family, that you would really appreciate seeing him with a professional haircut. Also, you could add in the benefits of looking really sharp at work with clients. I would suggest a place to go (somewhere simple, not too "frilly") and say that you would be glad to sacrifice something else if money is an issue. But if you make it a personal request from his wife, that will make him more attractive to you, he may hear that as more beneficial than just "get a haircut you goof!"
Best wishes, keep us posted

My husband has taken my son to the barbershop for a haircut. They both got cuts at the same time - a very cute dad/son event. They went to an old-time sort of barber where there are pictures of the 6 basic cuts or whatever ("I want the #1.") I think that utilitarian approach might appeal to your husband way more than a salon sort of place, but you may have to do some research to find just the place with the anti-cool vibe.

That, or buy some clippers and beg your stylist for some basic lessons (or there has to be something on YouTube?) At least then it would be even. Oh, that gives me an idea! Tell him you want to learn to cut his hair and so you need him to go to the salon with you so you can learn how to do it. Then when the cut is great, maybe you can back out of the offer and tell him to go back to the great salon?

Good luck! That would drive me crazy, too.

Hide/break the scissors.

He may be trying to save money, it's expensive! Cutting hair is hard, most people who cut at home only know one boy haircut and one girl haircut.

I would recommend talking with him about why he does it and that you'd like to see a new style.

Otherwise, that gift certificate idea is good.

Just buy him a gift card to the nearest barber, put it in a card that says "I love you more than ever." Leave it at that. Maybe even make him an appointment for the following Saturday and have it written in there.

There is a real good barber on Rt 47 in Huntley that my husband always went to until he decided to spend less. Now he looks for coupons to chains. He was in the military for four years and likes a neat trim.

LOL! I love the way you phrased your question!

Make it a special treat for the two of you to stay at a nice hotel with a a spa & get a massage, main-pedi (for you) and haircuts. Make it a romantic weekend and go out to dinner afterwards.

I also like the other suggestion about the sports-type salon.

Good luck!

Personally, I just tell my husband, you look like Bozo, it's time to get your haircut!

But to be more sensitive - I do like the gift card idea!

Make sure you really try to find someone locally who will give him a good hair cut - you need to know this person's work. If you talk him into a professional haircut and they do a lousy job - all will be lost and he REALLY will never go back.

Then tell him flat - out that he would be better coiffed with a professional cut, at least every second or third time that it needs to be cut, is important to keep a shape. Once you have encouraged him on "every third cut goes to the professional", at least he will be able to follow the lines on his cut, possibly better. Hopefully, you'll be able to encourage more professional hair cuts.

If he gets a really good hair cut, just the extra positive attention ALONE may be enough to motivate him to consider getting it cut regularly. (OR NOT! He may be one of these people who doesn't like anyone else touching his hair, he may not like the pampering or he just, plain doesn't want to spend the money on himself.)

I guess you can go about this one of two ways:
A: Just non chalantly tell him you made a haircut appt for him at the Barber's for Saturday...and then let the conversation go from there and say you love him, etc but he should get a professional haircut since he's in buisness and impressions count, and since his hair is changing, it's hard to give yourself a good haircut esp in the back, etc. I guess just be honest but loving about it.
B: Hide the scissors

Good luck!

My husband, in his 20s, used to look like a poster child for some 1950s-era hairstyle (ah, thanks, middle America upbringing!). I told him that he and I were both going to update our looks, made simultaneous appointments at Milio's (on Belmont--fun for a girl and a boy!), and we both got significantly upgraded 'dos. He's kept the style for years now by going to Hair Cuttery, but he had the "good haircut" template already on his head, and he started using molding wax then, too, and never looked back. It wasn't exactly a couples' spa day, but it did the trick.

Does he have a birthday coming up or your anniversary where you could schedule him an appointment as a gift? Perhaps as a pre-cursor to a night out on the town or weekend away? Then you could rave about how great he looks. It's sneaky, but it might do the trick.

As a conversation opener, you might mention some other man (maybe a friend of his) having gotten a really nice job done at a pro cut place. Then follow with mentioning that you've ALWAYS wanted to see what a professional would do to update his "look" to something trendier. Then I'd follow that up a day or two later with either the gift card people are suggesting or just an appointment (go with him and fuss over him - show him how excited you are!) to a place. Maybe the same place the other guy gets his hair cut? Make it seem like you'd like him to try something different to spice up your relationship, instead of mentioning that you don't like his current cut. Then, when he (hopefully) gets a great cut at a pro place, you can make sure he knows how much you like the new look and then perhaps he'll decide on his own to keep going back.

Good luck!

I would buy him a "gift card" of sorts or do like a spa day or something because he could use some pampering. Maybe research men's hairstyles with him. Make sure to ooooh and aaaah all the really sexy cuts that would good on your husband and maybe he'll get the hint. Good luck to ya! ;)

My suggestion is to get him a gift certificate to a place you would like him to go and put it in his Birthday or Father's day card. If you put it in a Father's day card...you can say that you a friend of yours was getting her husband that and you decided to do the same thing.

or You could have the person that does your son's hair ask him if he would like an appointment as well..(if he goes with him)...just suggestions.

Hi H.! Scanning through all the replies, I saw that a number of people mentioned directing him to a barbershop, rather than a salon. This may make an important difference for him. For my husband, this is critical -- he would never, ever set foot in anything called a "salon!" I don't think he would go to Sports Clips. You may need to scout-out a few shops for him (as he likely had no idea where any are!!) Instead of the gift card (and bribing him with a massage...also something my hubby would never do!), could you simply tell him, "I think we could spruce-up your professional image. I've made you an appointment at X Barbershop for this Sat at 10am."

Best of luck!!! :)

Well I guess it depends on your hubby...I would tell mine "Go get your haircut!" but you might want to say hey lets ALL go get our haircut and make him come with you

I loved the way you wrote your request. Thanks for giving us all a chuckle. :) I'll admit right off the bat that this is probably a little manipulative, and I apologize if someone already may have suggested this, but how about incorporating everyone's suggestion to give your husband a gift certificate for a haircut somewhere, but to have it come from your kids on Father's Day (although June 21 must see like a very long way off every time you look at his hair - lol!) or his birthday if that is sooner? If you give him the certificate, he might be more inclined to put off using it, or even not use it at all, but my guess is that he wold be more careful about not wanting to hurt his children's feelings about a Father's Day gift from them. Then, when he gets his hair cut professionally, HEAP him with constant praise about how great he looks even if it is a bad cut (which hopefully it won't be!) since that will probably give him such an ego boost that he will be more open to continuing to get his hair cut professionally in the future. Good luck!!