How to Tell My 3 Year Old His Puppy Is Gone (Not dead..gone Tho)

I did the same EXACT same thinf when my daughter was 3 and I was 6 month prego. I told her that the dogs mom and dad called and said they missed their baby and to please bring him home. Since she is so close to me and her dad she understood this. That was she didn't think it was her fault or mine. She still brings him up but she knows he can't come back......oh she asked to go visit his and i said i rorgot where he lives.

Hi M.!

I went through a similar experience with my kids and a dog we had to rehome. My daughter was 3 at the time. We simply told her that the dog wasn't fitting in well with the family and we found her a new home. (We had to rehome her because she began to get aggressive with our other dogs and started to show the same signs with us.) She was devestated, but we had to do what was right for our family and for the dog. We said it was ok for her to be sad, it was perfectly normal. We also told her that it had nothing to do with what she did. She was pretty upset for about a week, but as time drew on she adjusted and was ok with it. Do you plan on getting a dog in the future? If so, maybe tell him that and say, "When you turn 5 we will get another dog." Or whatever age you think would be appropriate. Puppies are a lot of work, they are like having another child in the house. Have you thought about getting an older dog? sometimes it is easier to help children learn to take care of dogs when the dog is older. But again, this all depends on your preference and what you think will work best for your family. I wish you the best of luck. These are definitley the difficult discussions we have to have with our children. Be prepared for the tears. Let him talk about it. Don't blame him in any way for what happened. Just know that you made the right decision! You looked out for the best interest of your son and the puppy. I commend you!

D.

Tell him the truth and get a smaller puppy ASAP.

When I was a child (about 7 years old), we had dogs. 2 dogs at the time. One day we came home from school and 1 of the dogs was gone! Just like that. My Mom simply said that 2 dogs were too many, so she gave it away.

We were angry. She gave no consideration to us... and she didn't talk about it with us. She simply made up her own mind, and got rid of our dog without our knowing. And, she never said sorry for doing so. We, had always remembered that... and thought it was so mean of her. Even my Dad hadn't known she was going to do that. We didn't even get to say 'goodbye' to our dog. Anyway, she didn't do that again, with our other pets since then.

But, the moral is... you have to be honest about it. Your son is still young. But I would explain that, as the others said, that perhaps Mommy made a mistake... the doggy is simply too big and too big for the house. Newfoundland's are so cute... but, to be happy, it needs a BIG house and a BIG yard. And that in the future, you and he will choose a pet that is suited JUST for him. Special and a good fit.

Perhaps next time, as he gets older, or when you feel he can handle it and the proper handling of a pet... get him a pet that is a good match in personality. Even perhaps, not a puppy, but a grown dog, that is well suited for children. Not all dogs like children, or the rough-housing.

I wish you the best... I know it's not an easy position to be in. Hopefully, your son was not heavily 'attached' to the dog? Or was he? Sometimes, children get over something like that quickly, so you never know. But allow him to talk about it whenever he feels like it. Openly.

And i feel, it's also important to apologize, say "I'm sorry..." to him. Acknowledge his feelings too, and say you are 'sad' too....but it's important for the dog to be happy in a good home etc. And that even grown up's make mistakes too, sometimes.

Once, we had a pet rabbit for my daughter. But it was destroying our house so we had to get rid of it, and adopted it to someone else. Our girl was so sad... but we explained that the rabbit was not happy and it was destroying our house... and when it was okay, we would get another one for her. She still talks about her previous rabbit...even though she has another rabbit now (which she loves). But we let her talk about it, and she still loves her previous rabbit and has her memories of it still. It is bittersweet.

All the best,
Susan

Get another dog ASAP .
B. v. O.

Why don't you tell your son the truth..that you overcommitted and you sold it to another family?

LOL, I bought my daughter a hamster when she was 3 YO. The thing stunk up my entire apartment and made a chipped wood mess. After the first week, I sent it right back where it came from and told my daughter it cried and wanted to go back to it's mommy. She is 25 now and we laugh about that now. You just have to be gentle because their pets are their friends. You don't have to fib, but you can be creative.

I agree with Tuesday M you have to be honest. Talk about how your yard/house was too small for such a big dog. Newfoundlands are BIG dogs. Make sure you stress that the puppy went to a good home and that you will get another one soon. Then do your research before buying a dog and check into rescues.

We bought my son a puppy, a labrador/german shepard mix. He's going to be a good size dog, but when we got him he was already 3 months old. He was big enough that my son could rough house and play with him. The local rescue here was more then happy to help us find the right dog for our home. My cousin also has 3 rescue dogs and the rescue helped her figure out which dog they had that would suit her pack best. It's been wonderful for my son to see us adopting these dogs and he now tells everyone to adopt instead of purchase from a breeder.

Hi there - we made the mistake of getting not 1 but two boxer pups when our toddler turned 1 1/2. Well needless to say it was way to much for us to handle, we tried it for 1 full year! the baby did get used to them but they were way to playful for her and continuously knocked her down and basically destroyed our yard lol! We found a great new home for them (same family still has both). That is exactly what we told the baby. WHen ever you asked her she will tell you that Ringo and Lulu went to a new home, where they have alot more room to play. We told her the truth and told her when she got bigger we will get a small doggie that can grow with her and won't knock her down and will be easy to take care of. just last month we bought a small cocker as promised =)

Tell him the truth. I made the mistake of telling my oldest that his pup ranway and he's 13 now and still remembers max! he even tells us how sad that was for him, so the truth is always best...try the truth in 3 year old style they will get it ;)

I would tell him that the other children needed a big puppy and that you did not have room in your house or yard to keep her. Let him know that he did a good job of loving the puppy and you will try to find a smaller one soon. Best of luck to you.

well there is really no easy way but be honest, you did not know how big she was going to be, and the place you live wasnt big enough for her, the older she grew the harder it would be to find her a place were she has plenty of room. I am so sorry maybe another time we can get a another dog when the time is right, The end... this is the same speech I had with my kids 15 yrs ago, and still to this day every once in a while the kids remind me about the dog named Julie, and how mom got rid of her.. ( lowers head ) oh well us parents are not perfect.. time to get over it kids.. lol

Can he visit the puppy at it's new home? It might be easier for him if he could picture where she went and know that she is happy and being loved and that he can visit her sometimes.

I remember my aunt bought a dog for my 2 little cousins one time, and almost immediately realized it was a mistake. She got rid of him the day before Easter and told the kids that the Easter Bunny had taken the dog to another family who really "needed" him more than they did and that they would get another dog for them soon (which they did , and they got a smaller dog this time). Like Carla said, just be "creative" and explain it to him in a way HE can understand. Good luck :)

Wow! This is a touchy subject. When I was a child my mom gave my dog away and when I returned home from school to discover my dog missing I was mortified! It took me many years to forgive my mom for doing this to me and to this day I still am hurt over it. Be extremely careful what you tell your child. You may be able to gloss over the fact that you were responsible for it since your child is so young. You may want to try something like, "Your puppy missed his mommy and went to go live with her." Something like that. Focus on the puppy's happiness and not the emptiness of the puppy being missing. Good Luck!

Don't worry he won blame himself.....
He will blame you my mom did that to me abut my dad told me and I blamed her so just tell him it ran away and in a few years the time will come when your just sitting there talking and youll tell him even though he'll be mad he won't be as mad as you telling him now

Hi, M.,

I think that the best thing you can do for your son and your relationship with him is tell him what you told us. By being honest, you build trust early in his life. You were kind to the dog, too. If you tell your son that you gave the puppy to a family whose children are bigger because the puppy was too big for your family, I think that he will eventually, if not immediately, appreciate your thoughtfulness and honesty.

Lynne E