How to Transition from Working to Staying Home?

Before you quit your job without knowing for sure if you can make it financially, try this. Start having your entire paycheck direct deposited into a savings account and don't touch it. Start cutting back now on all the things you think you can cut back on. Leave the savings alone and try to live on your husband's salary alone for the next 2 months. If things get tough and you have to either touch the savings or go into debt, then you shouldn't quit your job entirely. And even if you can make it, keep the money from those 2 months in that savings account and only use it in an emergency (like if your husband is injured and can't work or gets laid off). That two months salary may be just what you need to survive during tough times. Also, I don't know if you have health insurance through your husband's job or yours, but keep in mind that your health insurance cost could change if your and/or your children's insurance shifts from your employer to his.

My advice is to pray about it...make sure that this is the right thing for your family. Me personally, it was the only thing for us to do. I wanted to be there for my babies and make sure that I was raising them and being there for them as much as I could. But as life is, it throughs you curve balls! I did need to bring in some kind of income, so I did start working from home. It's great...I decide my hours and I bring in an income. It's getting better with time and I love it. So you might think about possibly working from home...or just see how it goes. Either way, being there for your children is soo important...It was scary, but soo worth it!!!

I wish you the best of luck - with staying home and with the new baby!!! :o)

I understand completely the frustration and confusion of this decision. We made the decision for me to stay at home eight years ago when my daughter was born. I was extremely excited at the time because I had to drive an hour one way to work but I was also very anxious about the financial end of it, and also how I would handle not working. It was tough at first, mainly adjusting to not having the social interaction at work, but I just kept focusing on what a blessing it was to be the one to be there with my child, to be the one experiencing everything first with her and not for it to be some stranger. Financially, we just really looked hard at everything we were spending money on, even down to coffee's and absolutely ANYTHING that was essential. I have been home eight years now and have got to experience the joy of being at home with my new son (who is 3 now) and I would never ever trade this experience for the salary I would have earned at work.

My main advice to you is to find a group to join. For me it was a Mom's bible study at our church. This became my life source, a place to share with other women and a break (even as short as it was) from being at home. This really helped me adjust! Good luck and may God bless you for your decision to be with your children!

I loved what Sarah said about putting away your paycheck. For me, I felt lesser than because it was the first time since I was a teenager that I was making a financial contribution to the family. It took a while to recognize that what I was doing in the home was worth more than any amount of money I could slip into our account. But in addition to that I would suggest finding a Mother support group in your area and begin making some friends who already stay at home. You would be amazed at how that group of friends will be there not only to laugh with you, not only to give sage advice when you are at your wits end, not only to bring you meals after you have the next baby, but they will be the place that you can find sanity on days where things are so chaotic there seems to be no sanity!! LOL Parenting one child is hectic, but two children consumes 10 times more time and energy!! Of course it is completely do-able, otherwise there would be a lot of households with just one kid! I guess what I am trying to say is the socialization for you and your children will be very important in so many ways - you can not begin to imagine. Another benefit is that these groups usually find very cost effective ways to entertain, educate and socialize their children - so they will be another way you can save long money!

For me there is no other choice...I will always be able to make money, but my children are only young once! It's truly been the best experience of my life and I feel blessed to have the opportunity to squeeze pennies in order to participate in this lifestyle!

Best Wishes!

Hi H. (that's my s-i-l's name). Get the Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. It's about paying off debit, but it's also talks a great deal about living with a budget, putting a $1,000.00 in the bank for emergencies and living within your means. I also support what others have said about working two more months ( I would work till June) and saving every check between now and then to see what it would be like. My last piece of advice is to see if you could do your job part time from home as an option. I remember a post from a mom who was a florist for a big company and was considering staying home. I had suggested that in that line of work, she could do that part time as her own business, setting her own hours, schedule. Well good luck in your decision and with the second baby.

Make the adjustments NOW (except gas and daycare) and bank the difference. Ideally, you would like to be saving all of your salary (except gas and daycare) for at least two months before you quit. This accomplishes two things - one, you know you can (or can't) do it. Two - you have a nice sized safety cushion in case the transmission blows and the hot water heater explodes.

S.

Once you get into the routine of things you will love it but make sure you take time for yourself. I have been doing a homebased business and working full time but was able to quit my job because I replaced my income. I am loving staying at home I still have the feeling of being out in the world because of my business I just make my own hours around my family now. If you want some information on what I'm doing just go to www.limubuilder.net/newyou.

L.

Do what everyone else has said.... don't quit yet, just save your entire paycheck... even the daycare for now should come out of your hubby's check. That should put you on the road quickly to staying home in August.

If you really like your job and they like you, you can do what I did and pitch a telecommuting position. It's a hard pitch, even these days, but depending on your job, and your track record with the company they might go for it. But wait till late June to make the pitch or August 1st, when you go on maternity leave, so they don't let you go if they don't like the idea.

But save, save, save right now. And don't quit.

You can do it! I agree with the other poster to do a trial run first... but trim your expenses first. Staying at home takes lots of financial sacrifices, but it's so worth it! Others have had similar requests like yours recently.... here's my response to one a few weeks ago.

If you're serious about wanting to stay home... big sacrifices have to be made for that. Sometimes we put ourselves deeper into big expenses than what we should. Just because we can afford something or we have the money to buy a bigger house or car, doesn't mean we should ..... please, that's not to say that's what you're doing. This is a lesson I'VE learned in my finances. And the discipline hubby and I had to learn in order for me to stay home.
We've learned to live WAY below our means so we have extra money to save; pay cash for big emergencies or unexpected things that come up (no charging credit cards anymore!); paying cash for big things we want (a vacation). Because our expenses are below what we're bringing in -- there's much less stress at home. When you live WAY below your means -- there's no need to worry about will we have $ for this or that b/c you're building your savings every month.
We live in a smaller, older home ... drive moderately priced cars. My husband bought a no-frills (no bells and whistles added) car recently. We have the same old TV we've had for years. Have the basic package on satellite - only one satellite TV in the home. Lowest priced plan on our cellphone. No cleaning lady. No dry cleaning bill - I iron everything. We eat out only once a week. I cook/prepare every meal - easier on the pocketbook. Even though we CAN buy all these extra things and we would like to ... we don't.

Ok.... so that's just my story. When we finally made the decision to go from 2 incomes to 1 - we were serious and we did drastic things. Lived in a one-bedroom apartment; no cellphones; drove old paid for cars. You said your car was cheap but what do you define "cheap". I define "cheap" as paid for in cash -- like that much cheap. Like NO car payment. What about hubby's car? His could be a paid-for older car, too.

We did the trial run of living just on hubby's paycheck and dumping my whole check into savings - we did this all during my pregnancy. And through this we learned to adjust to a more frugal lifestyle.

Also... you might want to consider rearranging your home living expenses. If you live in a home, consider selling it to buy a smaller home with a smaller mortgage payment. That's where the majority of expenses go to - a big mortgage payment. But i don't know your situation - you might be renting already.

Just examine every expense ... and really consider - can we get a smaller one of these - or do w/o it. or get an older one of these? Or sell this to get cash for it to help pay down this.
But my guess is that if you are $800 in the red (when you live off hubby's income) then you might have a larger expense that can be trimmed down or traded in.
Again, like I said -- drastic things need to be done. We had to do this, too, and it was soooo worth it! I love staying home w/my son. These first years go by so fast and I don't want to blink to miss them. We had the rest of our lives to buy big stuff -- but only these first few short years to stay home w/our kiddos. And the kids don't care what cars we drive and how big the home is. If they have a voice, they'd say - I want Mommy here.

*I remember when i was a child, i had a friend whose family wasn't "well-off" financially, but her mom was a stay-at-home mom. I asked my Mom "why can't you be a SAHM like (friend's) mom?" and she would say "because we can't afford it." As a child, that didn't make sense to me. Why could they afford it, but we can't? But looking back on it, I can see now that my parents had placed themselves into deep debt and high expenses so the NEEDED my mom to work. My parents took lavish vacations and shopped a lot -- so the credit cards bills were high; they drove new cars all the time -- they never drove "paid-for" cars. They always had a car payment. They never kept a car long enough to pay it off. anyway... my friend's family -- I can see now -they didn't have those high expenses. They drove older, paid-off cars and bargain shopped. And ordering pizza on the weekend was a special thing for them. We ordered pizza 2-3 times a week and ate out a lot because my mom was tired after work and didn't have time to cook by the time she got home. anyway... I can see now that if someone who's living on a lower income than what my Dad was bringing home at the time...if they can do - so can I. I just need to live like they did.

Good luck and you can do it! It is a leap of faith, but that's part of maturing -- to take these risks for the benefit of your family. Being disciplined to put your priorities in order - and letting that reflect in your checkbook/wallet.
Just keeping thinking that LOTS of moms/families do this - go down to one income (and not all of them are rolling in money) - if they can do it - so can I and I will because my kid(s) deserves a good effort from me!

H.~
Yes, it's scary!!! More than that YES, IT'S WORTH IT!!!
Soon after my son was born, quit working to stay home with him. My husband and I had agreed beforehand that it was important to us to be the ones who "put in" to our child... we didn't want to wonder if a caregiver was focusing on TV or another child-- or even ignoring a small need because ther were 10 other children in the room.
Reality was, there weren't many "out to eat" nights. (Of course, no family really had that til the late 70s... now we think it's the norm!) And we ha to budget very carefully.

Now, my kids are 17 & 15... and as hard as they were (yep, staying home with toddlers is DEFINITELY as hard as my current corporate job-- emotionally AND mentally!!!) as hard as it was, I wouldn't trade it for anything. ANYTHING.

Be flexible... if money is too tight, you may can find an independent contractor (construction, maybe) who needs someone to organize his paperwork from home; or take advantage of one of the many home businesses- just decide which evenings you'll work so you're not feeling overwhelmed. (Say, Tues & Thurs.)

YOU CAN DO THIS!!! Write anytime for encouragement!!!
J.