How to Wean Almost 3 Year Old

What a loving M.! I breast fed each of my 3 children for 3 years and it was wonderful. Bonding alone is priceless. They really are only little for a short while. I let my little ones know when the milk was running out. We transferred to their new big kid cups(they chose). There were whinny days and pretty pleases, but we got through it! You will too! (:
Best Wishes!

Added- the poster who has flamed all the mothers AND the original poster by calling them pervs and telling them they are sick for nursing toddlers is way out of line. I am reporting that post for flaming. Most of the world other than America nurses 2 and 3 year olds. Just because most Americans don't, doesn't mean that the millions of mother who do are "sick" or perverted because of it. Just because you don't understand it, doesn't mean you have a right to say those who do "get off" on it.
Original:
I will give you my advice which is probably different from an attachment parenting advocate or longterm breastfeeder's advice. You are done and there is nothing wrong with that. Your daughter wants what she wants and that's the way little kids are.

That doesn't mean you have to continue to give her what she wants.

Time to force the issue of her having to soothe herself in other ways. Put bandaids on your nipples and tell her that your nipples are broken and there's no more milk. Don't give in - period. When she wakes up and comes in your room, walk her back to her bed - over and over. It will be SO HARD in the beginning because you are dying for sleep. But just DO IT because caving to her, or letting her sleep with you will just create more problems.

Put warm milk in a cup and offer it to her. If she says no, give her water. NO JUICE!!! If she will not drink milk, she will not get juice. Don't talk about the differences in the milk. Offer an inch of warm milk in her cup when she is really hungry and waiting for you to put her food on her highchair. That's the best way to get her to take it, having to "wait" for her food. Don't push it, don't argue with her. Just don't substitute anything for the milk except the water.

Do give her plenty of calcium laden foods while you get her through this transition.

You will have to decide that you are going to really mean this and not let her play the sympathy card. If you give in just once, you will undo everything you have started, and you might as well expect to be nursing her until she's 5.

Good luck.

I have a TON of empathy for you!! My first weaned shotrly after my second was born, which was right around his 3rd birthday. My second will be two next month and is still nursing. My first literally told me one day that the "boo-boos" belonged to the baby now, and that was it.

My suggestion would be to decide if you want to wean her completely or if you want to consider just cutting back. Either choice is absolutely fine, try your best to recognize that you have done an amazing job getting this far, and if you are done, that takes nothing away from your accomplishment.

If you want to cut back, I can tell you what I do with my nearly-2. He nurses first thing in the morning, when I get home from work, and to sleep at night. In between, only if he really needs it...like he is bleeding...lol... Otherwise I tell him later and offer to snuggle or get him a snack, whichever seems to be the motivation for wanting to nurse. I have also found that he likes coconut milk or vanilla almond milk better than cow's milk, I think the taste is closer to breastmilk. Anyway, he knows that he still gets to nurse, it is just on a schedule, like meals and bedtime are on a schedule. You can't schedule a newborn's nursing, but you can a 2-3 year old's :)
Can you just let her into your bed to snuggle at 4am?

ETA (response to a flaming post that was deleted): Yes. I totally "get off" on the fact that neither of my children have EVER had an ear infection, they have each only been on antibiotics ONCE in their lives, my nearly five year old is, according to his teacher "exceptionally intelligent, sensitive, confident, and has excellent social skills." I "get off" on the fact that my sons will know that I did EVERYTHING that I could to prevent them from following in their dad's medical footsteps and developing Type I diabetes. I "get off" on the fact that I followed the WHO's recommendation for healthy children. I "get off" on the fact that I made the best choice for MY children. If you see nursing children as a perversion, you may want to explore those issues with a professional and stop throwing stones.

Oh that's so sweet. I was thinking to nurse my son till he is 4, but he got mouth surgery so we must wean him at age 10 mos old.
I read that it is proven breastmilk is still good till the kids turn 4.
You are a great M. :) very good.
When it was my son, we give him drink water every night when he wanted to nurse. After that, he just sleep all night. Then I went out in the day during his feeding time and come back when he was full. I did it like 3 days, and he was totally weaned.
In my country, some women put on red lipstick on the nipple and said it is injured, thus the kid doesnt want to touch it!
My M. put some spices on it, that taste bitter, so when my bro latched, he didn't get the taste of the milk. It was also successful.
Good luck M. :)
Don't think u have mental problem. It is normal. Breasts were also made for our children, it is our society that make it as sexual thing only.

My son would breastfeed to take a nap and he started to wean himself after my daughter was born but really quit when he was 39 months. I cut out the night nursing a few months before our daughter was born. I would just cuddle with him or have his dad take him I only had to do this a few nights and he started to sleep through the night.

Lolligirl has deep seated issues and is clearly a pervert. What you are doing is awesome and what is best for your child. I am sorry that you had to receive a response from someone like that.

First of all, KUDOS TO YOU. What a great M.!

I'm currently weaning my 4th baby, so I've already done it with 3 kids. At that age, this is the easiest way: Cut her off. I know it sounds harsh, but as moms we are all emotionally tied up as well with BFing. Go away for the weekend, not just the night and tell her you left the milk in Seattle. She might throw a fit or cry. Just hold her and tell her you love her. Cry with her if you need to. (I did.) My kids asked for milk 3 times and that was it. Just like any other parenting, I was consistent. I didn't waiver.

Oddly enough, when the next baby came around, I pumped a bottle and set it on the table and the one I had previously weaned always asked for a taste. I said, "Sure!" They'd try it and say, "Uggg, gross!!!!" Sometimes they'd ask to latch on and I'd agree. They just wanted to know they could, but none of them ever did latch on.

My second son was also a long term nurser. We night weaned first, with my husband getting up with him and not me. It didn't; matter if he wanted me, he didn't get to have me. Then when it was time for day weaning, I went cold turkey and refused. The upset that caused was short lived.

I breastfed both my kids, and let them self-wean.
My daughter did so at about 2.5 years old.
My son did so at about 1 year old.

For you, you seem done.
Your child is not.
She is almost 3.
All you do is tell her no.
Or distract her.
She is old enough, to have you delay it... or say no.

My kids too, it was nourishment and comfort. BUT once my daughter was 2.... we used to talk about "one day... you will be old enough not to breastfeed...." When she was 2, I did not give in... to every little moment she wanted to be nursing. I would delay it... or tell her "Can you wait a second, Mommy is busy...." And then I would make myself busy, which is not hard for a M.. And then before I knew it, my daughter would be playing something else.

You seem done with nursing, but you are not able to have boundaries with your daughter. So YOU need to have Boundaries, with her.
It is YOUR boobs, not hers.
When my daughter was younger and grabby with my boobs, I would gently tell her "that is Mommy's.... don't just grab. Be polite."
I taught her MANNERS about it.
AND though she was still nursing and self-weaned... I taught her, to NEVER just grab me or lift my shirt, and to ask politely. Not demand.

YOU are the one, that has to have boundaries about this. Otherwise, you cannot expect her, to stop. It is habit.
She will NOT be traumatized at all, by stopping.
Hopefully, she has a Lovey or several that she can sleep with.
Hopefully, she knows how to drink from other apparatuses by now.
Hopefully, she drinks milk from cups too, by now.
etc.

By the time my daughter self-weaned at about 2.5 years old, I still had milk. But it was NOT a river. A woman's body... changes in output, as the child grows etc. And I would actually tell my daughter "does Mommy still have milk coming out? Its going to lessen as you get older..."

Do you still have... milk, that is productive for your daughter?

As a child self-weans as well, they are at the breast, for a MUCH shorter duration. Less than 1 minute. How long... is your daughter actually AT breast drinking productively?????
If she is not drinking productively, she is just using you as a pacifier.

it's all up to you.....& it will not be the end of the world for her. :)

& honestly, a lot of the behavioral issues you're having (sleeping, etc) is simply because she smells you & instantly equates that with nursing. Move back to your own bed! Use the bandaids as Dawn suggested.

It is time. :)

Ooh... I can relate. I weaned my youngest at about 37 months. The good thing was I was able to reason with her at that age:). I think I told her it was time for me to stop and that my milk was running out.

Have you tried a "big girl" transition? Having a soft lovey can be a great way to teach kids how to self soothe. The bandaid idea is good. Or just tell her she doesn't need to nurse anymore because she's a big girl or something to that effect.

She is old enough to understand that you are done. Say no and stick to it. She has you where she wants your you are the adult.

I did not do this with nursing but I found if I gave my child plenty of warning and talked about it enough it turned out to be painful for only one day. (like getting rid of the pacifier or stopping using the stroller). Choose a date and let her know when it will be. Talk about it, talk about what she will do when you no longer nurse, talk about how you will still be close and will love her.
My other suggestion is to start wearing turtle neck dresses :-)

I really commend you for sticking with it this long! Holy Moly! I really think you need to stop it cold turkey, have a sit down talk with her and let her know that mommy doesn't have anymore milk and she is a big girl now and needs to drink from a cup. I'm sure this will not go over well but stick to it and do not allow nursing anymore if she ask give her milk in a cup and say that's what you can have now...stick with it, it will be tough but I bet in a weeks time she will cave and forget about nursing. It really doesn't take much longer then 7 days with a child to wean them from anything as long as you are firm and stand your ground.

Good Luck!