I Am Almost 2 and Driving Mom Crazy

I totally understand!! I am actually relieved that someone else is going through this....my son is 2 and a 1/2 and does everything just as you describe. My husband and I finally had to take a class at Scottsdale Healthcare. It's called Redirecting Childrens Behavior. It was an hour and a half of bliss! Just learning stategies that are age appropriate were worth it's weight in gold. As you already know, everything your daughter is doing is normal for her age, but that doesn't mean it's fun for mom. Check out their website under Programs and Seminars for the next class. I think they hold the classes at all three campuses. But in the meantime, just know it's all temporary....it too shall pass! shc.org

R., I feel your pain. Two year-olds can be very challenging...heck, three year-olds like my son, can be very challenging! There are a couple of parenting books that have been helpful to my sanity: "How to Behave so your Child Will, Too" and "Your Child's Growing Mind". The "How to Behave" book will help you take action to get you and your daughter back on the right track. "Your Child's Growing Mind" will help you understand this stage of your daughter's development.

I agree with Carol that at two years-old, your daughter is a bit too young to be expected her to entertain herself for any length of time. I know how exhausting a two year-old can be so please don't be too hard on yourself. It sounds like both you and she could use a break. Your daughter sounds very bright. Have you considered preschool for her? A couple hours at a time, a couple of days a week may be just what you and she need. My son behaves very well for other people and I am refreshed when he comes home so everyone gets along better. If not preschool, how about a regular play-date that gets her (and you) out of the house and on her best behavior?

What you and she are going through is normal. Congratulations on reaching-out for help. We mommies need each other...

You are going to have to teach her to listen properly. Go down to her level, make eye contact and talk to her. Eventually she will get it. I consider that she is still too young to know how to play by herself. I thought that myself with my first son. Eventually I just had him and my others when they came help me when I cleaned. I gave them small jobs to do alongside me that really didn't get in my way of cleaning. Spending more time with you will surprising make her more willing to listen to you. My down time was their naps. Have you tried a schedule? Like after breakfast do the dishes while she brings you a fork or spoon. Kids are oh so helpful at that age. While sweeping have her hold a dustpan with you. Give her a duster while you neaten up a room. Play a game for a bit, then go to the next activity.

Take walks and point out different colors. Go to the library for story time. When shopping, have her point out different items. If you know others with kids your age, have a play date. I love to do crafts with my boys. There is a clay you can make for them to play with using cornstarch and baking soda. If it gets in the carpet you can just add water and it dissolves. When my older boys were younger I always made it because playing with clay kept them occupied but then the clean up was easy.

It does take a bit of effort but I think it was worth it. When I realized a lot of the bad habits I saw in my boys were coming from me I decided to be more active with them. It was a difficult transition for me but it is worth it to have people tell me how well behaved my boys are even when I know the truth, they are still a handful, but they are mine.

Hello R.,

I totally understand what you are going through. One book that has really helped my is " Love and Logic magic for early childhood" By Jim fay and charles Fay. It's pretty easy for them kids to drive you crazy sometimes, but hang in there. It seems to me like she is fighting for your attention and she is getting it!

Right around that age is when kids seem to be moving constantly, I'm not sure if you have a activity scheduale for her, but it may help with her boredom. Have her day planned out already, that way she doesn't have time to get into EVERYTHING! One thing that really helps me when I'm trying to clean is to have the kids help( or try). Like if your wiping stuff, give her a little towel to wipe an area even if it's not really dirty, just so she can be involved with what you are doing. Our son has a little computer that has games, like abc's, 123's, etc.... So if we are on the laptop he is too.

Also I wanted to let you know they should have activies at you local library for you and your daughter to do. Youmay also want to check phoenix parks and recreation center online for classes for her to do ( or local community center). They are usually once or twice a week for right around 8 weeks and it seems to help with the behavior, energy, and boredom. They are really affordable to anywhere from 25 and up I believe. Also, you can socialize with other parents to help with your sanity.

I hope this helps! Let me know if you need anything..

N. M

Hi R.,
Your little one has already proven she is capable of entertaining herself, and is very clever and bright. At this age, her brain is working harder and faster than any computer on her quest to learn. So, some simple advice to think about:

The higher you set your expectations for your daughter, the higher she will climb to reach them.

I taught both my boys things they were allowed to touch/get into from the age they started crawling, and they remembered. For the times I couldn't/can't watch them, their access was/is limited (by me) to keep them out of trouble. Set limits, and then stick to them: too much freedom too soon doesn't teach a child how to know what is okay or not.

My 14 m.o. can play alone for 10-20 mins at a time -no TV- even with his big bro in the next room.

I think you have a good attitude toward getting your sweetie to behave (in other words, getting her ready to be an awesome person), and you must be on the right track, or she wouldn't have shown you she *can* do it already.

Good luck!
T