I Dread My In-laws Coming over for Christmas

Why not, just have a simple gathering this year? As in, just appetizer foods, simple, easy, and small. No big dinner, or lunch etc.

Invite the in laws over for a short time on the holiday and visit, eat a little, let them see the kids and then be done, and the in laws can leave and do as they wish.

Invite your friends over later in the day or evening and do the big, fun, gathering then. Whatever it is you want. Have your friends bring over a dish, and plan some games or what not, and enjoy yourself with people who want to be there and enjoy your company too.

Dont make this hard, or complicated. Make it easy and do simple this year with them.

Time to reclaim your Christmas experience and set up new traditions. I would set up something where you meet your in -laws at a restaurant for a meal either Christmas Day or Eve and spend the rest of the time as a family doing things you enjoy and that feel special. My family lives out of state so I can relate. To help, my hubby and I started a PJ Day Christmas where we have friends over, wear comfy clothes, play games, and eat appetizers. It is not the same as being with family, but I enjoy the day. Also, we do some type of service project each Christmas to help us remember what the holidays are all about. Make your traditions the focal point and then have your meal with the in laws be just a footnote. hohoho!

Why don't you do a small Christmas Eve thing with the in-laws, and then do your own celebration with your immediate family on Christmas Day?

I hear ya!! Family gatherings are so drama filled. Even when I try to be on my best behavior, I always end up in the middle of something... :)

Since you are just over an hour from WDW, Universal, etc., that is my suggestion to you. Treat your kids to a day at the park, the beach, what have you and 2 nights (Christmas Eve and Christmas) at a hotel. If you are not home, then the inlaws can't bother you or ignore you.

Breakfast? Or brunch. Not too heavy and they leave pretty quickly.
You need to remember this is Your Life. It's too short to placate difficult people. You are emotionally exhausted. Time to let them find another place to land.

Yep, it is time to make a change. I like the suggestions of a restaurant or open house. Listen, there is a good chance that the in-laws feel less than enthusiastic about the Christmas arrangement, too. I mean, if you don't love hanging out with them, it probably goes both ways and they may just feel obligated. Why not give them an "out"? Tell them you are changing things up this year and then do it.
My mom always did a Christmas brunch with appetizers and everyone would just drop by and stand around visiting, it was perfect because it was short and sweet and informal. If I were you, that is what I would probably do.

I think the idea of having friends over to make things more tolerable is a really good idea.
My in laws are great, but my BFF has in laws like yours, difficult, unpleasant and entitled. Yuck :(
They have started a tradition of a Christmas Eve "Open House."
They invite their friends and neighbors, and all their kids, from like 5 to 8 pm.
They do cider, hot cocoa (and cocktails of course!) as well as a large assortment of hearty appetizers and sweets.
Because there's a good size crowd, the in laws are less annoying, and because it's not a formal sit down meal it's a whole lot more fun.
And the best part is they get Christmas Day ALL TO THEMSELVES!
Any chance something like this would work for you?

the way i see it is you moved so you should travel back to your family for holidays if possible?

id try and figure out how to do that and really enjoy holidays again and get your kids bonded with your side of the family

Aw, I'm sorry you feel like this with the holidays. I can sort of relate. We have my family here, and sometimes family who fly in. The problem is that my husband hates my side of the family and makes this so stressful. After some unhappy years, I- like you- was trying to rekindle a love of the holidays.

We have realized that obligatory holiday gatherings are necessary. So we plan a few fun things just for us- parades, shows, whatever. And also have our own Christmas dinner, even if it's not on the actual day. This way we focus on what we like, not what we are forced to do.

It's tempting to just tell everyone to forget it, but we realized that the fallout and hurt feelings from that are not worth it. However, I like the suggestions to do maybe just Christmas eve with the in-laws so you have Christmas to yourselves. Or do brunch or something that will spare you part of your day.

Good luck, and I hope you enjoy the holidays! And maybe get to someplace with SNOW!!

My in-laws just don't come. When we first got married my husband's family would celebrate each year at a different family member's house. It was a nice change. My family would join also. We hosted in '95 and again in '99. The last gathering was back in 2000 maybe. Nothing since then. We do our own thing now with our moms, and don't concern ourselves with his family, who really don't get together now for any reason. I thought about resurrecting the idea for them and decided not too. Its not my place, nor my family. Hubby ain't interested in spending time with them either. So, I invite my family and that's it. I can ask them to leave if they get out of hand or annoying.

With my husband's family, (my family is in another country) we do the Christmas eve family dinner thing & between my mil, sil & bil, they usually take turns to have it at their homes. This way we can spend Christmas day w/ our own families & it works out very well! I, too, have to tolerate his family & thank goodness it's only a few times a year that I see them (believe it or not they all live close by, w/ the exception of my mil, I hardly see the rest of them!).

Good luck to you!

I think you should have a brunch with the in laws let her get tired and they can leave and then you can enjoy the rest of your day with family and or friends. I also like someone else's suggestion to go to WDW!

Totally relate, except my in-laws aren't as bad as you describe. They still drive me crazy, talk about only surface issues, are habitually late and are just all around odd and hard to relate to. I would MUCH rather have the holiday with just my husband and kids and/or good friends, but feel obligated to spend holidays with my husband's family. All of my family live far away.

I agree with others to say that you should make a change to your holiday traditions though. When ever we are able we meet at a restaurant for get togethers, (which don't usually include the big ones, like Thanksgiving and Christmas)... I think brunch or open house with your in-laws would be a great idea. Early in the day, whoever wants to come can and they can do their own thing while you enjoy yourself with people you want to spend time with.

Good luck~ I hope you work something out and have a better holiday this year!