I Have a Pacifier Addict, Please Help.

Hi there! I had one two. You can cut the nipple ;) on the pacifier. He/She will realize it is 'broke.' Plus, my little one had a blanket as a transitional object to cope. Good luck!

L. B.

My daughter didn't want to give her pacifier up either so we did a "special outing" reward for when she gave it up. We tried one by one taking them away but the fights at night to get her to sleep were more than I could take. So we sat her down and told her that she would get to go somewhere special when she gave them up completely. She couldn't have any at night, she had to be a big girl and give them up completely and then we would take her. She got to pick the place, and she gave them up really fast. Good luck.

If you want to stop one behavior you have to replace it with another. Get a soft stuffed animal with a soft tag and show him/her that rubbing it is comforting. I hear they have these things called taggies now but dont know where to get them. You could also take a piece of fleece and sew some silkie tags on it.

I had a paci addict as well...had to wait till she was about 3 but I gradually started "forgetting" and "losing" them till we got down to just one and then gradually I would temporarily "lose" it as well and eventually she gave up the habit. I also made sure she had other comfort items like her blanky etc. Good luck. Don't fight them on it...It'll come..
A.

I just had to do this with my 23 month old. He was an pacifier addict. I didn't want to take them away from him, I wanted him to be the one to choose to give them up.

So I decorated an envelope and told him that it was time for him to mail his pacifiers to all the baby's that need them, and he didn't need his anymore because he was a big boy. He knew what the mail was because I had taken him out to mail letters before.

Of course he didn't want to give them up at first, but I just kept bringing up the subject all day long. Finally in the afternoon, he put all but one pacifier in the envelope and popped the other one in his mouth.

I told him he would get a treat if he put the last one in. He agreed and we took the envelope out to the mail box and he got to stick it in himself and put up the flag. I gave him a cookie for a treat.

He actually did really well adjusting, he whined for his afternoon nap. Then at bedtime he just whined for about 5 minutes and fell asleep. When I got him up in the morning he was so proud of himself, he pointed to the door and started clapping.

My advice is to let it be her decision to give them up.

When my daughter was about 18months old, we told her it was time for her pacifier to live in her bed. She could have it whenever she wanted, but she had to stay in her bed to have it. For the first couple of days she'd go up to her room and sit for a few minutes to suck, but that gets really boring really fast. After that she just used it for naps and bedtime (but not for naps if we were at someone else's home since it was 'living' on her bed). I just let her know that when she was ready she could just put it away. Since we had never gotten her a pacifier bigger than the newborn size the dentist said it wasn't really an issue for her teeth. It took her a while before she gave it up for nightime, but she did and with no drama at all. Her choice, no bribes, just growing up at her pace.

I did the "pacifier fairy".
I had twins, and I was so sick of losing pacifiers and having pacifiers everywhere!!!
The final straw was being at Disneyland and the last pacifier I had with me dropping down onto Autotopia and not being found. Oh the madness.
Anyway...
I told them that the Paci Fairy was coming.
I went and picked out a bunch of toys and put them in gift bags.
They gathered up all of their pacifiers and put them in a zip lock bag. They were allowed to sleep with ONE that night. Once they put that outside with the rest of the pacifiers, they would get their gift from the paci fairy.
We closed the door and counted to 10 (I had their dad do the swap) and when we re-opened the door there were the presents.
They had a blast getting new things.
The day had its ups and downs, that first night was hard. But they knew they gave them away to the paci fairy and there was no getting them back.
It worked for me!!
Good luck!

mine never used them but god dang I wish they would have. I've heard if you nip a hole in the tip and they can't get suction they lose interest. Those hangers on, keep cutting the nipple back smaller and smaller. It worked for a couple girlfriends. Hope it helps!

I'll tell you what we did that worked like a charm...cut off the tip of the pacifier. Both our children would then try to use it and pull it out and declare it "broken". I let them use the "broken" pacifiers if they wanted, but they lost interest pretty quickly. It made it feel like their own idea to give it up. (I must add, my daughter was a more of a pacifier addict than my son. We ended up cutting hers a few times, shorter and shorter, until she decided it wasn't worth it. I remember she would later look at pictures of herself with the binky and talk about how she liked it and she was sorry it broke, but she didn't cry about it.) Good luck! :)

Hi E.,

Our friends had the same problem. They chose to use a pair of scissors and snip just a little bit from the end of the pacifier. They did this every day over about a week's time. By the end of the week, no more pacifier for him to suck on. They said he still tried to chew on the base for a couple of days, but gave up pretty quickly. Hope this helps!

K.

My son was an addict and it was tough. When we had our now 2yo daughter we didn't ever start, it was so hard to get her brother to give it up. First we phased it out when we were outside the house, then we phased it out for anything other than naptime or bedtime. We weren't buying any new ones either. We started telling him about the Pacifier Fairy (s/he only comes when you're ready, you put all the pacifiers in a basket, s/he puts them in a magic backpack and takes them away to give to new babies -- a totally bizarre story that I embellished more and more over time) -- one night he was ready and the fairy came, leaving a Lego castle covered with fairy dust.

So... you could go that route or the pacifiers could disappear one day, never to return. You'd probably be in for an ugly couple of days but it passes. Really, it does. Good luck!

Our son was 3 before we got rid of them entirely, but we slowly removed them from each stage of his life until he only got one at night. Then we put those that were left into a baggie and went to the toy store and he got to buy toys with them. While one of us shopped with him the other one gave the cashier a "heads up" (this was a Learning Express not Toys-R-Us) and when he brought his selections to the counter she asked how many pacifiers he had to spend and then she rang everything up and told him that he had just the right amount of pacifiers and he handed them over and that was it. He never asked about them again.

One of the benefits of doing things this way is that both you and your child know that the pacifiers aren't anywhere in the house. They're gone for good.

I had the same thing, and so did my sister-in-law. She pulled the plug at 18 months, and I just did it a week before my son's 2nd birthday. She had 5 days of hell, and I had 1. He was used to "wearing" it everywhere, but then they just disappeared. He had trouble really only with his one afternoon nap and bedtime. We made sure everything else stayed the same (taggie, pillow, CD music, lights out, etc.), so that he would transfer the comfort item to something else he was used to. He woke up crying in the night twice, but I went in and held him for 5-10 minutes, and he went back down. After about 2 naps and one night, he transfered the comfort to his taggie, and we were all done. I took all 6 pacifiers and tossed them. My sister-in-law had a tougher time, since she did it younger. You just have to stay strong, be FIRM but kind (just like all parenting). Like potty training which I do at 27-28 months, it works if you are willing to go into boot camp for 1-7 days. I like getting things over with in one swoop, even if the process is painful. It's always worse on the parents, and I can take that. Hope this helps!

I heard one time of someone who had that problem and told her kids that there was a pacifier fairy that took your old pacifiers to new babies that needed them. Her kids were so excited that they put them all in a box on their front porch and then she asked a friend or relative to pick them up for her. It worked for her. I never had a problem with it so I can't give you any personal advice. Good Luck!

Good morning! Need to quit cold turkey! When our son turned 2 my husband and I rounded up all bottles/pacifiers, bagged them, hid them. We sat him down, explained how good it was to share, proceeded to let him know he was a big boy now and that there was another baby who needed to use them. It worked. Hope it works for you!
B.

E.,

Cut the tip- they will lose interest soon enough and if that doesn't work, box them up and "send them to babies that need binky's" Take your child to the post office and let them know before hand that you are coming have them throw them away after you are gone- works like a charm.

Molly

I haven't personally dealt with this but I know my friend just stopped buying them and then when her daughter eventually lost them she was just done- she told her there are no more. It was a little challenging for her, as her daughter was an addict too. Good luck!

Throw it away in fromt them. Tell them no more. Endure the crying for a few days or the dental bill!! Give him his favorite blanket or toy. Buy him a new Big Kid toy and let him have it after you throw it away to show him that life goes on. I have a three year old, Trust there will be more things they will have to get over. It is our job to teach them how to deal with it.

I found that by snipping a tiny bit off everyday that after a while my daughter lost intrest! Good luck, N.

My daughter was stubborn and would not get rid of the binky. We let her have her binky in her room ONLY. After awhile, the appeal of going in her room to suck on her pacifier was out weighed by being with the family. Thankfully, her sister lost the pacifier behind the crib during the early morning hours and I refused to get up. The next morning I washed it off and "she" refused to take the binky. (My binky problem was replaced with silent reading and her hair getting brushed.) Good Luck and give it a little time whatever choice you make!

I just do the out of sight out of mind technique. My daughter was addicted as well and when I took her pacifier away after a nap time she just never saw it again. The same way with bottles...I wash thema all and put everything to do with bottles out of sight and offer the cup only. Out of sight out of mind. We never talked about it again. I didn't have any around to be found.

I potty train that way too. Once I start potty training I never use a diaper again...they don't like the coldness of wet panties in the night and I remove all the diapers from the house. It takes me a few days to potty train this way. I never scold for wet panties, but I really praise for going in the toilet and staying dry.

With whining and tantrums I just simply said I can't understand what you are saying...I wished I could understand you but I can't. Then when they talk in a normal voice I respond to them. They quit because they want you to understand them.

I know it sounds too easy, but that is what works for me. I have had four children.

D. B.

Whatever you do, don't wean your child 3 weeks before you go on a big trip. I weaned my daughter, who was 24 months old, 4 weeks before leaving for NZ. I did the gradual thing leaving the night time one last. And believe me, my duaghter is stubborn. Anyways, getting rid of the last one was pretty easy. She would wake up complaining once or twice but I would just rub her back and she was back to sleep. Well, it was too easy because once she was on the plane and falling asleep she would wake up an hour or two later and cry and scream for an hour. Very embarrassing since it was around midnight and everyone on the plane was trying to sleep. There was a lady in front of me who had a baby and I finally asked her, after people started coming up to me to ask if they could hold the baby, if she had a spare pacifier. She gladly gave me her extra and as soon as I popped the paci in her mouth she was out for the night. So we were on vacation for almost 3 weeks and I just let her have it again because she was out of her comfort zone. But once we got back I explained to her that was the end of it and she was fine. Funny story, about a year later she found an extra one in the console of my husband's car and was so excited to find her "lion su su". I told her she couldn't have it cause it was old and yucky so I took it and told her that you throw old and yucky things in the garbage. A week later she asked for it and i told her the garbage truck took it away. Later that day we were driving down the street and she said "stop that garbage truck and get my lion su su back". She was so mad at the garbage man for a couple of week when it was garbage day but she got over it. Every once in a while she will bring it up that the garbage man took her lion su su.

You may think I am mean. However, it worked.

My daughter was about 3 when I did this. She spoke fine, but her teeth were getting pushed out, because she had such an oral fixation. Here's what I did.

Because she was 3, she understood when things were broken. We had the "talk" about when "plug" was lost or gone, we would not be replacing it. So one day, when she was playing, I took one that she was not using and cut it with scissors to the plastic part and tossed in the middle of the floor, so she would find it, and it was "broken". One down. Granted she was upset and she cried. She tried to use it and couldn't, so she tossed it into the garbage. I gave her lots of hugs, because she was really sad. But I am telling you it was only a couple of days. Night time was hard, and we had to talk about how "plug" was gone. But she got over it. 2 days.

A week later she found the other one. She put it down, I did the same thing. I did this not in front of her. I cut it and put it somewhere in her toys and she was bummed that this one was broken, but she came to me crying, saying this one broken too! But she threw it away, and started playing again. She had an animal she liked a lot (Elmo doll) and attached herself to that.
Some people just take them away, but I felt that it was easier for her to understand that it was broken and they didn't work anymore. We tried just taking it away, it was a disaster. It seems mean, but it worked.

Good luck.

Maybe your baby needs the pacifier. It seems we are always trying to take away things from our children that make them secure and happy before they are ready. My daughter sucked her thumb till she was five or six and then stopped due to social reasons at school. She is now a very healthy happy 19 year old in college. She needed that extra security and it probably helped her cope with stresses. Dr. Brazilton and Dr. Leeche both advocate allowing children to ween themselves from the pacifier when they are ready. When their security needs are met they are more secure. When you take away their security, they become more needy and less secure.

You're lucky! You've got pacifiers. Take them all and then throw them all in the garbage. Then the hard part comes of saying they all went away and refuse to buy any more. I've got two thumbsuckers. I don't know what I'm going to do!

Dear E.,
This is a tough one. My son never had a pacifier. He was never interested in the least.
My daughter, who is 10 years older, never wanted one until I took the bottle away. And she never sucked her thumb a day in her life until I took the pacifier away. She sucked her thumb for a long time. I never put any of that hideous stuff on her thumbs or did any of that to her. My husband HATED her thumbsucking. He yelled, chided, humiliated and threatened her. All it did was make her want to suck her thumb more. So, I made a deal with her. I told her I would not say anything about her sucking her thumb as long as she did it in private. No sucking in the car, in the store, at other people's houses, while we were sitting as a family watching TV. And I told my husband to back the hell off. It worked for her. She would go in her room, pull a blanket over her head and suck her thumb to go to sleep. Eventually she just went to sleep without it. I just didn't see any sense in fighting over it and it's not like I could cut her thumbs off and throw them away or something. Kids are different. My son never showed any interest in thumb sucking. Some babies start doing it in the womb. What are you gonna do?
I also was a binky baby. I didn't get to nurse. I came home from the hospital and my mom didn't. My grandparents took me until she was well enough to come home. I was walking and talking and still had to have my binky. I didn't even suck on it anymore, I wore it around my neck. I had to know where it was at all times. One day, my parents had a neighbor come over with her new baby. They told me how sad it was that she didn't have a binky.
I took mine off and gave it to her and that was the end of that.
You'll find a way that works.

HI E.,

this is so important because it is the imprint for all self-soothing to come. write a list of the things you feel are healthy to self-sooth, and bring those to your child to teach him/her how to feel good and calm and stimulated in other than oral ways. (examples: bath, candles, music, touch, laughter, nature, beauty, adventure and discovery, stories, etc!)

a good cure for any addiction is to put a healthy self-soother in (for a period of time appropriate for the person) before the addiction object, every time, like say 10 minutes of water play before they get their binky. this will gradually teach other skills, then to over time increase the healthy and reduce, then eliminate, the less healthy.

best wishes and blessings,
A. m
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My mom said with me, she got fed up and one day she just walked over, with me watching, and dropped it into the garbage can. I knew then that it wasnt coming back.

My sister with her thumb on the other hand..... she was still sucking her thumb at 9yo!

Both my children gave them up on their own when they were ready and it was super easy. (both were around 2 years 10 months). I think that developmentally they are still going through so many big hurdles in their twos that I didn't want to take away something that they found soothing. Just as with so many things (potty training, walking, etc) they will do it when they are ready for it. Just keep your eyes open for an opportunity for them to give it up....

With my daughter, we had just come back from a long trip and she asked for it but it was still packed in our carry-on so I told her to wait a bit til we unpacked. She was surprisingly fine with that, so I didn't tell her when I unpacked and found it. She asked once the next day and I told her it was still packed, and she never asked for it again.

With my son, he wanted to move into a "big boy" booster seat. I told him that when he was a big boy and gave up his paci we could get the booster he wanted, and he took the paci out of his mouth and handed it to me on the spot and never asked for it again.

Go cold turkey! That is my best advice. My husband and I dreaded getting rid of my sons binky-he was 2 1/2 and hooked on it with nap/bedtime. We took it away one day and told him he was a big boy and didnt need it anymore. The 1st couple days were the hardest. I felt like he asked for it every second. But soon he didnt ask anymore. His little brother uses one for nap/bedtime too, so we would just keep those hidden. Now, he could care less. Good luck!

My baby sister was addicted to her pacifiers... she had like 3 or 4 of them... so what we did was just took them away one by in a short amount of time until she had one. We would tell her weird stories so she would be okay with it. When she was down to the last one, we told her the cat dragged it out into the street and a car ran over it... and she accepted it. She is well-adjusted today and teaches at Sac City!

Throw all the pacifiers into your outside trash with your child. Say goodbye. Two-year-olds are old enough to understand your explanation that pacifiers are going away. Be sure to offer other comforts, like a blanket or stuffed animal, that your child can use to self-soothe. You may have a couple of bumpy days, but then your child will probably be fine. Kids do adjust to changes in their lives like this one. Best wishes.