I Need Help - Mount Carmel,IL

Updated on February 01, 2010
M.N. asks from Mount Carmel, IL
13 answers

i put my daghter on her potty and she dosent go so i lever her bottemless cuz other wize she will remove the dipper or pull up then shortly after she pees on the carpet....she is 19mo. verry bright but just dosent want to pee on the potty or big potty only did it once but for her daddy and we reworded her with a sticker.and she was happy..how do i get her to go on the potty and not on the floor or her pants

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So What Happened?

just today she went in her potty 2 times she draged me to the tolet and said pee pee so i desided ok we will try and she went...i gave her tp and time alone and in 2 minnets she went i clapped for her and let her pick out her reword...her grandma was hear and said that i was pottie traind by her age....earlyer today i was joking and said well sins we converted ur bed will u start pee peeing in big gril tolet...she loves the bed cuz its low to floor and she can get out and in when she wants....its getting eassyer to potty train..because she loves to hear good job and we give her hugs and kisses for it

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K.E.

answers from Toledo on

I would say that she isn't ready. Just because she did it once. The more you push the more stressful it will be for both her and you. Take a break and try again in a few months or something.

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C.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

Sounds like she just isn't ready. :(

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J.V.

answers from Chicago on

Good for you for getting the potty learning going! Kids have a window between 18-24 month, so good for you for recognizing it! And yes, when they start taking off their diaper, it is time to teach --at least this is what we did as a society until very, very recently!

She goes shortly after on the carpet because of performance anxiety. It isn't that she doesn't want to do it, it's rather that she is just figuring out how to control those muscles. You are going to have to be patient why she figures it out. It took my daughter from month 15-17 to figure it out, and then, at month 18, she just started going on the potty. Now, at 22 months, she is almost completely done (including night). But, even though she is trained, when she was sick last week, she lost all control and we had tons of accidents. Controlling those muscles and being able to get to the bathroom in time isn't easy, so our job, as I see it, is to be very patient while they figure it all out and to just be there to guide them as they learn.

What you need to do is seriously just be patient. Play with her in the bathroom and try real hard to get her on the potty when she starts to go. Also, take her poop and dump it into the toilet, while telling her that poop and pee go into the potty --this really helps them learn what the toilet is for. Once I started doing this daily, my daughter started going on the toilet. Also, it is estimated that they need to get pee in the potty 12-15 times before they fully understand the process. So our job, as I see it, is to help them with the first 12-15 times, and then keep on helping them by encouraging them once they've got it.

Give her time. Since she is removing the diaper, she is totally ready, it's just a matter of being patient, not showing any emotion, and giving her the time she needs to figure it out. Potty learning is very much like them learning how to crawl or walk: they need practice, and lots of it, especially when they are little.

Once you've had her go a few times in the potty, then you need to put her on a schedule and establish hard core rules: you go pee when you wake up, after breakfast, before we leave the house, before we eat lunch, after nap, etc. To further encourage it, I'd buy a portable potty for when you leave the house to just help with the anxiety of public toilets. My daughter only used a portable for a few weeks before she wanted to just go on the regular toilets. Expect her to request going when you are out in public as part of the process of her learning about it all: my daughter asked to go at every single place we went, even if she didn't have to go, she was just curious as to what would happen if she did and we weren't at home.

Good for you for wanting to assist your daughter in this process!

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H.B.

answers from Portland on

I agree, she isn't ready. My daughter was 2 1/2 before she was interested and didn't really take to it until closer to 3. Don't hurry it.

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O.S.

answers from Charlotte on

i agree sounds like shes not ready

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B.B.

answers from Indianapolis on

Be sure to tell her when she goes to bed that you are so proud of her for going potty, and you really like it when she uses the potty like a big girl - that was awesome!! That serves to reinforce the good behavior.

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S.F.

answers from Columbus on

It could be she is just not ready. When kids are not ready to go to the potty, they won't and no matter how much you want them to, it just won't happen until they are ready. Put the pull ups or diapers back on and wait a couple more months and try again. Your only driving yourself nuts and things are not going to happen until she is ready. I have a girl too, and I understand that you want her out of the diapers, but it will happen all in good time.

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S.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

I really don't believe you have to wait for signs of readiness. We are about the only culture that waits for the child to be ready. Get a book on early training and keep trying without pushing and without making her feel bad for accidents. A simple "oops, we better clean that up" and having her help is sufficient.

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B.R.

answers from Columbus on

M.,

She's too young. When my son was young, I started to potty train him one week before he turned two. No luck! So I gave up and waited a week. This time it went smoothly with no problems! One week made a huge difference. I would wait until she's two.

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I.D.

answers from Dayton on

I agree with everybody else. It's great that she shows some interest but don't push her! In average kids get potty trained between 2 1/2 and 3 1/2. Putting too much stress might scare her from getting potty trained and might get you some gray hairs! If it seems hard then give it a few months then try again. If she doesn't seem interested then, then wait a few months more. I have 3 kids and my 2 girls didn't get potty trained until 2 1/2 and my son until 3 1/2. Potty training is a combination of muscle control, bladder maturity (to hold a good amount of pee in between) and understanding of how your own body works. Don't feel discouraged! It's a thing that you have to leave it to when she is truly ready even if she shows some interest now.

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K.Z.

answers from Cleveland on

If she has a friend of about her age or a little older who uses the potty or toilet, you could point this out, but very casually, e.g. when "Jane" is over at your house, ask, "Jane, do you need to use the potty?" and maybe let your DD see "Jane" using it. My mom tells me that is how I trained. Good luck!

K. Z.

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L.M.

answers from Terre Haute on

I would just keep introducing the potty, but not pushing it. I would say she's not quite ready, but keeping it in her head will help. After she takes her diaper off take her to the potty if she has already peed make her sit on the potty and just tell her that she is supposed to put the potty in their. Or maybe sit her on it at bath time. I have been potty training my 27 month old son for a week, and made huge strides. Very few accidents. When he pooped his pants, I dumped the poop in his potty and told him that is where he needs to put his poopy, and yesterday I was getting some clothes around to bathe him, and hollered in at him if he was ready and he answered "No, I poop" I found him on the potty red faced. Sorry so proud had to share. But he has actually started showing signs since before Christmas, but I knew then that I was too busy to put my whole heart and time into it with my other kids activities during that time and you really have to be available to sit them on the potty every 10 minutes and gradually increase that time and have a while to devote to it. Signs my son was showing was telling me after he went in his pants or just removing the diaper and saying yuck. He would be dry after a nap. Some people think in they should be dry in the mornings too, but I dont agree with that one all of my kids were trained during the day before they were holding it through the night. He would also go and sit on his potty when he saw me sitting on the toilet, and very interestedly watching his brothers when they potty. Just pulling the diaper off alone is not necessarily a sign,...it could be, but it could just be her learning something new. Undressing herself. Keep onesies on with her diaper, and it should keep her from pulling it off. That helped with my son anyway. Good luck.

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A.C.

answers from Cleveland on

It doesn't sound like she is really ready. It is best to wait until they are really showing signs of wanting to sit on the potty and can truly sense when they have to pee and poo. If she is going on the floor and in her pants, maybe give her more time to grasp the sensation and ability to hold :) We have 8 children and they each caught on in their own time but all of them had gotten in by the time they were 2 1/2.
Best of luck!

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